Collateral Damage
by Xx-Synthetic-Cyanide-xX
Summary: Silver liked to control everything in his life, from how often he changed his socks to his emotions and feelings. But one tiny decision can change the course of everything, and not always for the better. What happens when Silver finally realises that every action has consequences, and that fighting the feelings of love can only lead to collateral damage on both sides? COMPLETE!
1. So what if I like chess?

**Collateral Damage**

**Hello again everyone! Merry belated Christmas! and Happy New Year to you all! Ah, finally finished the first chapter to my new story. It will be quite a dark story, but there will be lemons so don't panic :)**

**It is mainly based on PreciousMetalShipping I.E GoldXSilver for those who don't know, but there will be hints of Polishipping and even some Originalshipping thrown in. Be nice to me I have never written from Silver's point of view before and that is how the story begins.**

**Oh and just to let you know I don't own Pokemon or make any money from this fanfic, or any of my other work. I don't want people suing me :P**

* * *

**Chapter One: So what if I like chess?**

Throughout my life I had always tried to control every aspect of it.

It ranged from the small things, such as how often I would wear a pair of socks or when I would wash my hair and for how long, to the bigger things like my emotions and feelings about other people. _Well... most of the time I didn't have those... feelings I mean._ It was like I was just empty, and that no-one mattered to me. I guess that now I had controlled so much of my life that I even managed to control my heart.

I have never felt love, or anything of the sort, I have never dated anyone or ever wanted to for that matter. To be honest I liked being on my own, it was safer that way, then no-one would get hurt in the process.

It was times like the present when I loved knowing I had control over a situation, a battle with some loser in the street, a fight with a tramp who stunk of body odour, or just to make myself feel good. As long as I knew I was the one in control then I was happy.

_Just like now._

Here I stood watching some loser,_ who was about ten? Eleven maybe?_ Trying to helplessly save his pathetic excuse for a Pokemon from my attack.

_ A Ratatta, so utterly pathetic._

It had no chance against me, but I waited.

I didn't deliver the finishing blow right away, no that would be too easy. I wanted him to suffer, to sink into the pits of despair while I knew deep within I had the power to either win this fight or lose it.

_ Ha! Losing wasn't an option, only weak people lose_.

"Sneasel, finish him off!" I commanded, watching my ice type use it's slash attack on the Ratatta.

It shrieked and was sent crashing to the ground. It's body trembled but it was unable to stand.

I was the winner.

The boy, actually let me correct that... the_ loser_ just stood there trembling like some stupid leaf in the wind.

_What, was I that intimidating? I sure hoped so._

"You... you..." He stuttered, trying helplessly to save what was left of his feeble Pokemon.

Of course, Pokemon are only as weak as their trainers, so it was only natural his would lose. I smirked and folded my arms.

"Yes, I know. I'm too good, you don't have to tell me that,"

The boy scowled as tears fell down his face.

"You... you treat Pokemon so wrong! You... you have no heart!" He cried out.

Like that would bother me.

_ Hell I knew that!_ I didn't give a fuck about it.

"Let me tell you something kid..." I muttered, walking calmly towards the cowering boy. "...Pokemon are only as weak as their trainers, so that means you must be one God awful trainer,"

His eyes twitched as fresh tears fell down his face, I could see he was trying to speak but no words came out of his mouth. I smiled again.

"Maybe you should just give up being a trainer, after all, you won't ever win a battle with weak Pokemon like that,"

Watching this loser break down in front of me was actually kind of appealing, to think that I had complete control over this situation. Again he remained silent and just cradled his pathetic Pokemon.

_What a loser._

"Take up another career maybe... like a Tree Surgeon," I commented, returning Sneasel to her Pokeball and taking my leave.

That was enough for today, I had caused enough chaos and was proud of it too.

All I could hear as I walked away were that loser's cries because he lost.

He should have expected it, that is what happens when you cross me.

* * *

For some odd reason I found myself standing outside Goldenrod's Pokemon Centre. It didn't seem such a bad idea to maybe rest there for a while, after all, it would give me a chance to warm up and my Pokemon to relax.

It was also my day off from work for a change.

Lately the Manager at the Goldenrod Department store seemed to give me the dodgy shifts, the one's that no-one else would do because they were either too God damn early or really late at night.

Oh well, not like I had that great a social life, and to be honest work was the only thing I slightly enjoyed right now.

I sighed, thinking about how stupidly late I would have to work tomorrow night.

_Until 10pm_? They were seriously pulling my leg, but I agreed to it. Turning down an opportunity for me to earn more money wasn't an option.

I entered the Pokemon Centre, realising that it was late afternoon so it was probably going to be crowded with other pathetic trainers who couldn't fight themselves out of a paper bag. Frowning to myself my eyes darted across the mass of people, all standing around, gossiping about the days events.

_Why the fuck were they in my way? Couldn't they see I was trying to get past?_

In annoyance I barged past a teenage boy who was in my way and stomped up to the counter. Nurse Joy smiled at me before she spoke.

"Hello young man, would you like me to heal your Pokemon?"

I just nodded and placed the Pokeball's on the counter.

Shoving my hands in my pockets I waited impatiently for her to finish so then I could sneak back off to my apartment, which luckily for me was in Goldenrod City. I needed to have a serous clean up, lately I had just gotten so messy and untidy because of work and since I had the day off it seemed a good idea.

Nurse Joy swiftly returned handing my Pokemon back to me with another smile.

"Have a nice day!"

I scowled and snatched the Pokeball's off the counter.

I just wanted to go home now, my deeds for the day were officially over and now I felt exceptionally pleased with myself.

As I was about to walk through the abomination of people once again I heard my name being shouted,

"Hey, Silver!"

I froze immediately, knowing exactly who the voice belonged to.

This was bad, it had been three months, maybe more since I had seen him and considering he was the only person who I could call an_ 'acquaintance_' then he would definitely want some sort of explanation.

It was Gold.

I slowly turned around to face the direction of the voice, feeling all the hairs on my neck stand on edge.

It was Gold and he was sitting at a table with Crystal. He was smiling stupidly again, just like how he used to and I really wanted to just turn and walk away.

I had no time for this.

"Don't just stand there! Come over here and sit down!" He called again, this time making Crystal wave at me.

Biting my lip I cursed myself.

_Why did I want to sit down and have a cosy chat with those two? Especially Crystal, she was hardly the easiest person to talk to. _

Sighing I admitted defeat and trudged towards them, knowing that if I did actually walk away Gold would never let me hear the end of it.

"It's been way too long Silver," Gold mumbled, trying to sound disappointed as I sat down uneasily.

I shrugged, not really caring how long it had been.

_ I was busy, you know working for a living and stuff like that._

"I see you are your same indifferent self," Crystal commented, still smiling like an idiot.

This was not what I needed right now, I needed to get home and clean my apartment. It was the only time I had to do it.

"I can't stay for long, I have more important things to do" I said sternly, folding my arms.

Gold seemed to pout at my words.

"But we haven't had a chance to catch up! You only just got here and you want to leave already? Oh come on Silver, don't be such a spoilsport,"

I sighed again, placing a hand to my head.

A catch up was the last thing I wanted right now.

"Yeah! We have tons of gossip to share with you!" Crystal beamed, nudging Gold in the ribs making him cringe in pain.

My eyes continued to flicker across both of them, still as annoying as ever.

"I'm not interested"

Crystal seemed genuinely hurt by my comment, not that I cared. She was of no importance to me. I just tolerated her because she was a good friend of Gold's, but then again... _why did I tolerate Gold? _It's not like we were great friends or anything.

In fact I don't really recall a time I was ever nice to him, when we first met I did push him over in front of the laboratory and several occasions after that.

"So... I hear you got yourself a job now?" Gold asked, his eyes looking directly into mine which made me cough uneasily.

"I have"

"Where?"

_ Like I was going to tell these two where I worked?_

I wouldn't get any rest and they would probably keep coming in the store just to annoy the crap out of me.

I huffed in annoyance;

"It's none of your business"

"I heard he's working in Goldenrod Department store..." Crystal tried whispering across to Gold, but I heard every word anyway.

I sighed.

"So what if I am? That doesn't mean you two can come and bother me at work"

Gold pouted once again.

"Do you really think we would do that?"

_ Did he want me to answer that truthfully? _

Instead I bit the inside of my lip and turned away, trying to think of a suitable excuse for me to leave, and quick.

"Anyway, Crys and I were going to stop here tonight to rest up for tomorrow, do you want to stop with us?" Gold asked, his voice sounding as if he was begging me to say yes.

"No"

"But why not? It will be fun!" Crystal joined in and I scowled at her, making her shut up immediately and look away.

"What is so fun about staying in a smelly Pokemon Centre stuck with you two?"

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot! You don't know how to have fun do you, Silver?" Gold joked, laughing after his words.

I guess he was right in a way. Fun for me was kicking the crap out of some loser in a battle, or being generally mean to strangers in the street, not staying in here with two babbling idiots.

"I think the only time I have seen him interested in anything other than battles is when I introduced him to chess..." Gold mused, making Crystal perk up again.

"I never knew you liked that sort of thing Silver," She said, her voice sounding pretty shocked.

Chess was okay, it was kind of like a battle and you could still kick your opponents ass at it.

"I didn't at first...but Gold kept going on and on at me to try it..."

"Yeah, I guess I did. I persuaded him to play with me. I suck at it, but Silver cottoned on pretty quick"

It was now I was noticing how quiet the Pokemon Centre had become.

"I am a fast learner, unlike you," I mocked Gold, who just laughed.

"But I taught you everything you know!"

"Like hell you did! I had to learn it properly from using books and the internet! You taught me things you are not supposed to do!"

A few snickers were heard in the Pokemon Centre and I tensed up slightly.

_ Why was everyone else so quiet? Was the conversation so interesting or something?_

"Ha! Yeah, sounds like me. But still, now I bet you could beat anyone at it,"

"I wouldn't go that far, it's not like I am a professional or anything,"

Crystal's face seemed confused for a second before she joined in.

"Have you ever thought about taking it up professionally?"

"Could you really imagine Silver doing that for a living?" Gold commented and they both laughed.

Well, at least I had a hobby and something I was good at as well.

"Shut up Gold, I could beat you any day at it."

"So... what got you so interested in it?" Crystal asked me, leaning on the table, looking at me with large blue eyes.

Surprisingly I had gotten into this conversation now.

"I guess it was the thought of having control over the other person, and knowing their every move and having something to come back with. Most people just think you need a lot of luck for things to go smoothly, but it's all about knowing the other person and what they will do,"

Loud laughter erupted in the far corner of the room, making me turn and scowl at whoever was causing it.

_ How dare they interrupt my conversation!_

"Yeah, Silver kind of goes into maniac mode every time. I mean when we did it the first time he was confused at first, but then he learnt faster than I did! It took me absolutely ages to figure out how to do it properly, but he's a natural"

The hairs on my neck stood on edge as I could feel everyone's eyes burning into the back of my skull.

_Why was everyone so interested?_

It was probably the most boring conversation ever to those losers.

I bowed my head, trying to ignore it.

"I could never do that, it's just so...difficult! I don't understand how anyone can do it..." Crystal groaned, probably feeling sorry for herself.

"Don't worry Crystal, I don't think it's for you anyway," Gold mused, patting her blue hair lightly in a patronising way.

It was still too damn quiet in here, I didn't like it.

My paranoia was acting up big time.

"So... when was the last time you did it? Properly I mean," Crystal asked me, obviously genuinely interested.

I sighed, not actually knowing.

"I have no idea, I think the last time was with Gold... a few months ago"

"I remember that, you absolutely owned me! I just had no way of fighting back. It was like it was over as soon as it started,"

Once again the laughter erupted throughout the Pokemon Centre and I suddenly went very quiet.

Things were starting to piece together in my mind. By the look on Crystal's face it seemed like she knew why everyone was laughing.

"Guys, I think we should change the subject..."

"Why?" Gold whined, turning to his childhood companion.

Coughing uneasily she looked around the room and whispered.

"Everyone is staring at us, especially at you and Silver,"

I had noticed it too, and it was extremely unnerving.

Gold smiled uneasily as the laughter died and was replaced with deadly silence.

Then it was like the penny dropped and I accidentally shouted out;

"Oh shit!"

Putting my head in my hands I knew exactly why people were laughing at us and staring.

"What's wrong?" Gold asked, seemingly worried.

"Think about it Gold, that conversation... it didn't sound like we were on about chess did it?"

And it sure as hell didn't!

_ It sounded as if we were talking about sex, and me doing it professionally and the last time I did was with Gold! Oh fucking hell!_

I tried hiding my face as Gold exclaimed;

"Well... I guess not now I think about it. It kinda sounds like me and you were..."

"I know! You don't have to fucking say it!" I literally screamed at him, keeping my face hidden in my arms.

"But does it really matter what they think? We all know you wasn't talking about that so why get upset over it?" Crystal tried making me feel better but the damage had been done.

_ I didn't want the whole fucking Pokemon Centre thinking I was gay and liked having sex with Gold! _

I already got teased about that because of how long my hair was and I hardly looked very manly did I?

I could slowly feel my energy draining away as my head ended up slamming onto the table.

"Silver... don't get so worked up about it. I don't care, It's kinda funny really," Gold chuckled, but I wasn't laughing.

_ How could I laugh about this?_

Everyone now thought I was some sort of faggot who enjoyed owning Gold's ass.

_ Hell, I didn't know the first thing about that sort of thing! _

And now I couldn't escape it.

"Gold... you wouldn't care if the Pokemon Centre exploded..." Crystal muttered under her breath loud enough for us to hear.

"I wouldn't go that far,"

"I don't want people to think I'm... I'm... gay!" I exclaimed, lifting my head up now to stare at both of them.

Gold shrugged, he obviously was unaffected by this.

"Does it really matter? You are probably never going to see these people again, and so what if they think that? You shouldn't get upset over it if it isn't true"

I scowled at Gold, biting the inside of my mouth, trying to come up with something vulgar and horrible to say back but, I just couldn't.

Of course it wasn't true, but I didn't want people to think that way about me.

Gold would probably act camp if someone accused him of being gay anyway, just to amuse everyone, but I wasn't like that. I took things too personal always.

I sighed, feeling the walls close in on me slowly.

"Come on Silv, cheer up,"

"Don't fucking call me that!" I spat angrily, glaring at the dark haired boy whose amber eyes widened at my words.

"Okay, okay!"

"It's fucking girly, Silv is a girl's name and I'm not a girl," I commented coldly.

He nodded, and turned to Crystal who just shrugged.

"I think we should go to our rooms for the night, at least then we won't have any more people staring at us,"

Now the idea of staying here didn't seem all that bad.

Truth be told I didn't want to walk through all the people and have them all judge me and mock me. Perhaps staying here tonight wouldn't be so bad.

"Is the offer still open?" I mumbled, hating myself for this.

"What offer?"

"The offer to stay here tonight..."

I watched as both of them smiled at me, and immediately I wanted to change my mind.

They had already caused me enough grief as it was.

"Of course it is!" Crystal beamed happily.

"Actually forget it... I'm going home!" I declared, standing up and almost knocking my chair to the floor.

Again everyone stared at me with those piercing eyes that literally carved into my withered soul. Closing my eyes I took a deep breath, wanting to ignore it.

_Why did my paranoia get so bad?_

Usually I wouldn't care if I was causing a scene, but not now. Not now everyone thought I was some sort of faggot.

"Silver, calm down. It's okay, you can stay here with us, we really don't mind" Gold said quietly, trying to get me to sit down again.

All the hairs on my neck were standing on edge as my head bowed.

As much as I hated this I hated the attention even more so reluctantly I sat down once again.

"Seriously, one of these days you are going to have some sort of breakdown..." Crystal commented, placing a hand to her head.

Folding my arms I ignored it, not wanting to say anything else. Seems like our conversation had already ended badly, and remind me never to speak of chess ever again.

"But we have a little problem Crys..." Gold said sheepishly, scratching the back of his head.

"What problem?"

"We only ordered two rooms for tonight..."

My eyes widened and I wanted to literally run out of the Pokemon Centre right now.

I didn't care if everyone mocked me or stared at me, the thought of sleeping in the same room as either of them was making my skin crawl.

_ Even worse if I stayed in the same room as Gold! _

There was no way in hell that was happening.

"Fuck no..." I murmured, shuddering.

"Crys, go to the counter and see if Nurse Joy can order us an extra room,"

I watched as the blue haired girl stood up uneasily and made her way over the the counter.

Sighing I could not believe how stupid I was, if I had just decided to go home instead of coming here then I would not have bumped into Gold and he would not have made me talk about fucking chess and make everyone think I was a faggot.

There was still time.

"Silver... I don't see what the big deal is," Gold mused, refusing to look at me.

"It's bad enough being stuck here with you two let alone sharing a room with you!"

I watched as the amber eyed boy just chuckled at my words.

Honestly I did not see what was so amusing. Then again that was just how Gold ticked, he found almost anything funny, and especially if it was aimed at me.

"Is it because you are worried that everyone will think you are gay?"

"Shut the fuck up Gold, you have no idea how I am feeling" I said coldly, refusing to look at him any more.

I guess it was a concern of mine, and the thought of sharing a room with either of them wasn't very appealing. Being in my apartment on my own in my own bed was more like it. So what it was just me in that apartment, but that suited me fine, in fact solitude was the only thing I enjoyed more so than working.

My eyes flickered upwards when I noticed Crystal returning to the table, her face looking a little solemn.

"Well?" Gold asked, nudging her slightly.

She sighed and shook her head.

"All the rooms have been taken, there is nothing she can do about it,"

"This is fucking great..." I muttered, biting the inside of my lip in annoyance.

There was still time to go home and leave these losers here and never have to see them again.

_Yeah that seemed like a pretty good idea, go home and clean my apartment. Right, now think of an excuse..._

"It's okay, I can stop in the same room as Gold if you like and you can have my room," Crystal offered, trying to help in some way.

_Shit, there was even an option for me now. _

My eyes watched Gold's expression.

It seemed he wasn't too keen on that idea for some reason, which was weird because they were such good friends. Maybe it was the whole male and female sleeping in the same room thing, I don't know.

"Forget it, I'll just go home,"

"Come on Silver! It won't be that bad!" Gold tried lightening my mood even if it was just marginally.

Those large amber eyes of his stared into my own cold silver ones and I couldn't help but look away.

Why did he always look like that when he wanted something? I was trying so hard to fight this, to say no, to stick to my guns and just leave.

_ Why was it so hard to say a simple word?_

"Besides... we need to talk about Gold's birthday!" Crystal beamed, making me flinch involuntarily.

_ Gold's birthday? Why on Earth did she want to involve me in this charade?_

Birthday's were a waste of time, wow you get a year older and twice as drunk, nothing really great to celebrate. I sighed, feeling as if my only means of escape was fading and now I would be stuck here for the night.

"Crys I told you not to make a fuss!" Gold said sternly, shaking his head.

"But you are only eighteen once!" She cried out, trying to get her point across.

It was stupid really, even though I wasn't best friends with Gold I could read him like a book.

He secretly wanted a big fuss made of him, to be centre of attention. The complete opposite to me, but sadly my birthday was Christmas Eve so usually everyone was making a fuss anyway.

"So.. will you help me with the birthday?" Crystal literally begged me and I sighed for what seemed like the hundredth time this evening.

I casually stole a glance at Gold and as expected large eyes stared back at me, making me look away instantly.

"No" I spat, making the blue haired girl's eyes widen.

"But why not?"

"I have more important things to do,"

Of course it was a lie, in fact the most important thing I did nowadays was go to work and do my dodgy shifts at the department store.

I just didn't want to be associated with this stupid idea and especially if Crystal was organising it.

Disaster was bound to strike.

"Oh Silv, you're killing me!" Gold wailed, pretending to be upset, quite obviously I might add.

I scowled in distaste.

"Don't fucking call me that!"

"Oops, my mistake," He chuckled, completely forgetting the fact he was acting upset less than a few seconds ago.

Stupid Gold.

I hated the way he acted so carefree, like nothing in the world fazed him at all.

I hated the way he could easily approach anyone and act like he had known them for years.

The main thing I hated though was his smile, that stupid goofy smile of his, it really ticked me off. If the world was ending he would still be stood there smiling like an idiot. _Not a care in the world, just happily going through life without any worries, a fucking perfect life..._

"Silver? Are you listening to me?" Crystal beckoned suddenly, making me snap out of my train of thought.

My eyes focused on Gold, who now looked kind of confused and a little worried.

"No... I guess not," I murmured, rubbing my head.

_What the hell just happened? Did I just space out or something?_

"Why were you just glaring at Gold?"

I looked across to Crystal, her expression seemed none to friendly.

"I was?"

I scratched my head, closing my eyes for a second.

"Yes! You were just glaring at him like he was dirt on the bottom of your shoe!"

Shit, seemed like my thoughts got carried away.

I never meant to glare, I guess it was just a part of me. Bowing my head slightly I bit the inside of my lip.

"I didn't know I was doing it..."

"Hey Crys, it's fine! No harm done! Silv's glare attack did not leave me paralysed, so don't worry!"

_ There he goes with the pet names again! Maybe he was doing it to psyche me out, was that it?_

Still, I decided against causing a fuss this time.

"That's not the point..." She continued, as large threatening azure eyes glared back at me.

Seemed like my actions had really gotten under her skin for some reason.

"Maybe he wasn't staring _at_ me, but _through_ me? Like when people space out or something, well I do it a lot..." I looked across at Gold, who was trying to come up with an excuse for me.

_But why? _

"I think we should all head up to our rooms, I'm getting tired," I murmured, trying to get rid of the tension that had leaked into the atmosphere so suddenly.

Not that I hated tension, usually it was one thing I loved, but not this time._ It just seemed... odd._

All three of us made haste and retreated up the stairs to where the rooms were located.

The Pokemon Centre was dimly lit as night time was setting in, leaving us to bathe in it's afterglow. The stairs creaked underfoot and a part of me wondered if they would just cave in and I would just plummet to my untimely doom.

"So, who's sharing with who?" Gold asked, standing outside two doors.

I didn't want to voice my own opinion so I remained quiet. My antics had caused enough chaos for one night.

"Well... I would rather not share with either of you," Crystal commented, making Gold nod respectfully.

That was exactly how I felt right now.

"Okay, then Silver can share with me,"

Somehow I managed to trip over nothing and almost ended smashing my face into the wall.

_Well, I had good reflexes sometimes... _

Regaining my balance and brushing myself off I waved my hand, showing I was okay. They need not worry about me.

"Yeah, we can talk birthday's tomorrow," Crystal beamed, now happy about the fact she had a room to herself.

I on the other hand was not so thrilled.

The idea of sleeping in the vicinity of Gold wasn't what I had in mind on my day off, but I just tried my best to accept it.

_ It was for one night, no big deal right?_

"Goodnight Crys!" Gold said, as both him and I watched the blue haired girl whisper_ 'goodnight'_ and retreat to the safety of her room.

Then it was just Gold and I, and the silence started to sink in, smothering every crevice of the hallway. I could just barely make out his expression in the dim light, it seemed like he wanted to say something but decided against it.

"Sorry about the room arrangements Silver," He eventually decided on saying.

I shrugged, trying to make out it was no big deal.

"It's fine, lets not make a habit out of it though" He smiled again and I cringed.

_Why? What the fuck was there to smile about?! _

He fidgeted in his pocket for a moment to get the key for the room. I just waited patiently, after all, I rarely had a decent night's sleep so this should be no different.

Slowly Gold unlocked the door and pushed it to, releasing a heavy creak as the wood scraped against metal. Seemed like this door hadn't been opened for years! It was in desperate need of repair.

With that in mind I followed Gold into the room and prepared myself for the night's events.

* * *

The room was actually okay for a Pokemon Centre room. Not up to hotel standard but, with a little more added luxuries it could come close.

It was quite large and airy, allowing lots of natural moonlight into the room.

The décor was not to my taste, but it was basic. Creams and whites, the same colour as the curtains.

If it was me I would've preferred black or red, at least red is a warm colour.

All this white was making me feel even paler than usual.

"See, it's not so bad is it?" Gold tried pointing out as I watched him dive onto the large bed, which was also coloured in sickly whites and creams.

Slowly my eye twitched as the realisation started to sink in.

_ This wasn't a single room! We had a fucking double bed!_

Closing my eyes and balling my hands into fists a part of me could not help but think Gold knew about this, and that was why he apologised outside the door.

Instead of pummelling seven shades of excrement out of him I walked over to the large window and sat down in one of the chairs.

I would stay here tonight, no questions asked.

"Silver? Why are you over there? The bed is real comfy!"

"I don't care," I spat, folding my arms and returned to gazing out the window at the hundreds of stars that illuminated the sky.

I heard him sigh behind me.

"So what, you going to stay up all night?"

"Maybe I will."

The bed creaked suddenly and I turned to see what he was doing.

He was now sat up on his knees, arms between his legs, looking at me with sorrowful eyes.

_Like I would fall for that look._

"But you'll get dark circles under your eyes and you'll get wrinkles if you don't get enough rest"

"I'd rather wither away than sleep in there with you!" I literally shouted.

Turning away I vowed not to look back, I would stay here just gazing outside, looking at all the stars and wondering if any of my old wishes would come true eventually.

It was silent for a while, it seemed like Gold didn't know what to say, and that was how I liked it. Sadly the silence did not last for very long.

"You like looking at the stars, huh?"

Bowing my head slightly I laughed nervously.

"So you noticed?"

"What's so interesting about them?" Gold questioned, making me reminiscence about the past for a moment.

The stars were always a comfort to me ever since I was little, and whenever I felt like I had nowhere else to run or turn to, I would look into the night sky and make a wish to the stars.

_ Now I think about it, it was really stupid._

"It's none of your business,"

"Come on Silver, don't be like that..."

There was another wave of silence, only this time the silence was even more awkward than the last time. It just made me want to tell him everything, about the past, about why I was so bitter and twisted.

Sighing I relaxed in my chair.

"It's just... something I do to remember the past,"

"But... why would you want to remember the past? Why not look forward to the future?"

I chuckled at his words.

_ Future? What future? What future did I have?_

I didn't, I would be stuck in the rut of going to work, coming home, cooking food, eating alone and then going to bed only to replay the same sordid routine day after day.

"The past is the only way I can remember my Mother..." I blurted out, forgetting that Gold was in the same room as myself for a second.

I placed my head in my hands, trying to block everything out, this room, Gold, this situation.

It was all a mess, I shouldn't be here, I should be at home on my own.

"So... the stars, are they some sort of comfort to you?" Gold's voice was soft and tender for once, which was strange.

I was so used to his annoying brash voice. I nodded, realising that he probably couldn't see me in the moonlight.

"Mom... used to tell me when I was younger that if I felt down or upset, or I felt like I was going nowhere to always look up at the stars and make a wish that things will get better,"

Now it was out in the open it actually felt like a weight was lifted from my weary shoulders and somehow I managed to find the strength to look over at Gold.

He was now sat on the edge of the bed, just looking at me.

"Now it makes sense, so basically you are feeling like that now?"

I scowled, not wanting him to know how I was feeling.

I should have complete control over this situation, over my stupid emotions or lack of them.

Yet, right now I didn't.

"I just find it helps sometimes..."

We didn't speak any more after that.

Gold eventually fell asleep on the large bed, snoring so loudly that I thought it might wake up Crystal next door.

I tried to get as comfy as possible in the chair, even though sleeping in such a confined space was rather difficult. Still, sleepless nights always haunted me so it shouldn't be any different tonight.

But before I tried to sleep I looked upon the brightest star in the sky, silently wishing for some sort of change in my life, for it to alter direction and maybe to eventually find some solace from somewhere.

Closing my eyes I smirked. As if that was ever going to happen to someone like me.

* * *

**First chapter finished! Brownie points for anyone who thought the chess conversation sounded dodgy anyway! Please read and review! It would mean so much to me!**


	2. Playing with Fire

**Hello again! It seems I have alot of ideas for this story hence the quick updates! **

**Thanks to everyone who has already followed this story and to my one reviewer! **

**It means alot! **

**Now, enjoy the next instalment!**

* * *

**Chapter Two: Playing with Fire**

It was the intense beams of sunlight that awoke me from my slumber.

Surprisingly I had managed to sleep all throughout the night without any problems, which was strange. Nightmares had constantly haunted my sleep ever since I could remember so to actually wake up without having horrific images taunting me all day was a pleasant change.

I yawned and stretched out my body only to realise I was not in the chair any more. Sitting up suddenly I looked around only to realise I had somehow managed to end up in the bed!

_Okay, now how the fuck did this happen?_

_ Did I sleepwalk or something? Oh God! Tell me I didn't do anything stupid!_

Luckily for me it seemed that Gold was not here, maybe he had gone out for breakfast or was using the public toilet. At least it would save me the embarrassment of trying to come up with some sort of excuse, even though I had no idea how I got here.

I closed my eyes and rubbed my forehead, praying to whatever God was out there that I did not sleepwalk here.

The door creaked suddenly, making me leap up and grip the bed sheets for dear life.

_Oh shit! What if it was Gold?_

And sadly it was, looking as cheerful as ever, and not even seeming bothered about the fact I had ended up in the bed.

"Gold... I am going to ask you one thing and I want a straight answer" I demanded coldly, narrowing my eyes at the dark haired boy.

He stood motionless, before nodding.

_ Maybe he was trying to figure out what exactly I was going to say?_

Taking a deep breath I closed my eyes;

"How the hell did I end up in here?!"

The boy flinched involuntary at the harshness of my words, but then again did he expect me to be so calm?

"You... slept walked," He answered simply, leaning against the wall, trying to distance himself as far away from me as possible. Probably for his own safety.

Smacking my hand off my head I cursed angrily.

_ How could I have been so stupid?!_

"It's okay though, I just left you in the bed and went for a walk. We didn't sleep together in the bed if that's what you are worried about,"

If my face could've gone any paler I'm sure it would have. Well at least we didn't end up sharing the bed, it was bad enough people assuming I was batting for the other team, let alone this situation making things worse.

I breathed a sigh of relief and relaxed in the bed.

_So I slept alone after all, thank goodness._

"What time did this happen?" I enquired.

Gold's eyebrow twitched.

"I would say about 4am? It was okay though, I couldn't really sleep anyway so I just went out for a walk,"

I eyed the amber eyed boy carefully.

_ Couldn't sleep? What reason did he have for being so restless?_

"Why couldn't you sleep?" I asked casually, trying not to make it seem like I actually cared, which of course I didn't.

Gold's eyes trailed downwards to the carpet before he decided to answer me.

"I don't know, I guess I just had things on my mind"

I just nodded, not wanting to get into detail, and I honestly didn't really care so I just left it at that.

Gold moved from the wall and cautiously sat on the edge of the large bed, which I had to admit was rather comfy.

_Goldenrod Pokemon Centre had gone up in my estimations._

I groaned in discomfort, feeling a crick in my neck. It must have been when I slept in the chair.

"So... do you have to work today?" Gold asked, obviously trying to make some sort of conversation.

I nodded, not enjoying the fact that I would be working until 10pm tonight, and probably wouldn't get home till about 11pm.

"Yeah, I am working late tonight. The Manager decided to give me all the dodgy shifts no-one else wanted,"

Scowling to myself I just knew why she did that.

I had to work with the new guy, some stupid ponce who seemed to charm the pants off the Manager at his interview. And now I was stuck with him, trying to teach him the basics of working in the store.

"Why don't you just say no then if you dislike them so much?" Gold asked, making me laugh slightly.

"Yeah, and if I start doing stupid things like that they will give me less hours and then I won't be able to pay my rent. Good thinking there Gold,"

He looked away, and sighed.

I knew I wasn't the easiest person to get along with but still, that idea was ridiculous, and besides, I reckon I could cope a 7.5 hour shift with some newbie.

It was no big deal.

"So... what area do you work in?"

I combed my fingers through my hair, feeling how tangled it had become during the night.

_God, I hated getting knots._

"I work in the scent department, it's fairly new and it allows people to purchase scents for massaging their Pokemon,"

_Yeah, I know it wasn't the manliest of positions, but at least I knew a lot about my job._

"Oh right, how come whenever I go in I never see you there?" Gold asked, his voice sounding a little disappointed.

I shrugged, not caring if I saw anyone while I was at work.

"I was probably busy in the stockroom sorting out the delivery, they always get me doing that..."

Clenching my fist I wondered why they kept sending me down to the stockroom to sort out the deliveries, I hated doing that. Then again I hated customers even more.

"Well, how about me, you and Crys go to the café this morning to have a proper catch up? I mean... last night didn't go down too well did it?"

I watched as the amber eyed boy chuckled after his words and I scowled.

I didn't find it funny at all.

"Don't remind me..."

"So, will you come with us?" He literally pleaded to me.

The idea of eating this early in the morning never appealed to me, but still it would be the last time I would see these losers for a while, so what harm could it do?

Reluctantly and a little hesitant I answered;

"Fine, but no talking about chess this time,"

"You have my word," Gold said defiantly, placing his hand over his chest like it was Scout's honour or something.

I rolled my eyes at the idiot and decided to get out of bed, even if it was really comfy. Way more comfy than my own back in my dingy apartment.

"So, I guess you don't fancy a game with me any time soon then?" Gold joked, smiling that stupid idiot smile as usual.

I glared at him, wishing that if looks could kill he would simply explode to smithereens.

"What the fuck did I just say?!"

"Sorry, my bad," Gold murmured apologetically, and lightly tapped the back of my shoulder with his hand.

I tensed up, hating any human contact.

_Why did people feel the need to touch others? _

It was disgusting and not necessary. Anyway I decided against biting his head off and stood up. I started brushing out the creases in my clothes and even tried to flatten my hair as best I could, considering I didn't have anything to brush it with.

Gold just seemed his usual bubbly self, even if he didn't have a good nights sleep. He still had that sparkle in his eyes and that stupid grin.

_God... I really hated that._

* * *

We left the room swiftly only to be greeted by a rather enthusiastic Crystal. She seemed even more hyper than usual, coffee fix perhaps?

Anyway I tried to ignore her whiny voice, going on about how happy she was that I agreed to go with them to the café. Why she was pleased I have no idea, unless the subject of birthday's was on the agenda again.

Gold and Crystal lead the way down the creaky stairs, which once again groaned with every step.

As we walked out into the Pokemon Centre lobby it was literally devoid of all human activity, apart from us and Nurse Joy. She smiled at us and waved a goodbye in respect.

Gold and Crystal said their goodbyes but I chose not to, to be honest I just could not be bothered to say goodbye to someone I probably couldn't ever see again.

Breathing in deeply I noticed that the weather was surprisingly pleasant.

It wasn't cold, but it wasn't very warm either, which suited me perfectly.

After all, having the curse of pale skin that refuses to tan and only burns in the sun meant that a day like this was my form of heaven.

"So...did you sleep well?" Crystal enquired as we leisurely walked towards where the café was situated.

I assumed she was talking to Gold and so did not answer. It was only when she looked at me with large questioning eyes and coughed uneasily that I realised she had asked me the question.

"It was... okay I guess,"

"Silver slept walked last night, but it was okay. I managed not to wake him up," Gold added to the conversation which made me bite the inside of my mouth in annoyance.

_ That's it, tell the whole fucking world!_

"Oh! Well... that's a relief! Waking someone up while they are sleepwalking is meant to be really dangerous,"

I huffed, shoving my hands in my pockets as a gentle breeze wafted through my hair. I hated this false pretence that just seemed to envelop us.

"To be honest Silver is dangerous when he is wide awake so I wasn't risking a beating," Gold joked, chuckling at his words.

Crystal even tried to stifle a giggle, obviously not wanting to displease myself.

To be honest I liked knowing that others found me intimidating, at least then no-one would mess with me.

"But still, I never imagined some-one like you to sleepwalk," Crystal said in awe, shaking her head slightly as the thought obviously had just sunk into the few brain cells she had.

"I'm just full of surprises..." I said, my voice laced with sarcasm.

Gold smiled and for some odd reason decided to ruffle my hair.

"Yeah! I was surprised when you said we can't play chess any more!"

In a temper I batted his hand away and glared at the amber eyed boy. It seemed like this whole chess conversation was going to keep haunting me.

"Oh what? That's dreadful! Why not?" Crystal joined in.

It was bad enough I was stuck walking between them not both of them talking through me as if I wasn't here. That just made it ten times worse.

_Oh why the fuck did I agree to go with them?_

"I guess Silver can't handle the pressure of my greatness, and obviously he knows he would lose next time," Gold mocked and instantly the light in my mind switched on.

_Try to mock me would you? I'll make you wish you had never been born!_

"If you seriously bring up this topic again I will rip your balls off and ram them down your throat..." I said calmly, which probably made it sound even scarier.

There was a brief silence and Gold's eyes widened considerably.

Of course I wouldn't ever do something like that, I would probably just beat him up and be proud about it, but what I said sounded better.

"Silver... you shouldn't let things like that provoke you or upset you," Crystal cooed sadly, her eyes focusing on the small stones in the pavement.

I huffed at her comment.

"I'm not upset! I told Gold not to bring it up and all he fucking does is talk about it!"

Now my voice was getting louder, I guess my patience was slipping.

"Oh come on Silv! I'm only pulling your leg!"

I could feel my hands balling into fists, ready to wipe that smug grin off his face if he used that pet name again. I assumed my face was going red from what Crystal said next.

"Gold, stop tormenting him. He might bust a blood vessel if you carry on,"

I just glared, and continued glaring.

He would rue his decision to continue mocking me, I wasn't something he could laugh at and make jokes about, and he would realise that.

* * *

The café came into view quite suddenly and it took me by surprise.

It was a new building and by the looks of it still hadn't been noticed by a lot of people. It was hidden away down a few narrow winding streets and wasn't pride of place, which most establishments were in Goldenrod. That being said it was quaint and quiet, just how I liked it.

I wondered how these two idiots discovered this place, they hardly had great map reading skills. An ordinance survey map and a compass could not be of any help to those two idiots. Still the silence between us was a comfort and all three of us made our way through the large oak doors.

The intoxicating stench of coffee and bacon overpowered my senses as I entered and made my stomach groan. I wasn't sure whether it was because I was hungry or feeling sick.

We decided to sit at a table situated by a large window, mainly because Crystal kept waffling about how beautiful the view was from the window and Gold just agreed with her. I wasn't fussed where we sat, it was of no importance to me.

_I don't even know why I came here._

"Isn't this place lovely?" Crystal beamed happily, looking around the café eagerly, breathing in the quaint atmosphere.

"Yeah, I'm just glad it isn't bustling with people. Silver wouldn't like that,"

I looked across at Gold wearily, raising an eyebrow.

_ I wouldn't like people being here?_

Well, I guess he was half right, it was only people I did not like or had no time for.

_Then again... that was 99.9% of the population..._

"So, shall I go and order some coffee?" Crystal asked us, looking at me expectantly.

I wasn't in the mood to drink coffee this morning, I only drank it if I had a morning shift at the store.

"I'll just have a glass of water,"

"Oh come on Silver! Have something a bit better than that! You can have water from the tap back at your place!" Gold exclaimed and once again I glared at him.

It was my own choice, he should seriously learn to butt out of my business.

Crystal noticed the tension between the two of us and decided to break it.

"It's okay, let him have what he wants! You want a coffee Gold?"

I watched the dark haired boy nod.

"Is it two sugars?"

"Yeah, with a little bit of milk,"

I rolled my eyes, as if he had a specification to how he liked his coffee.

_Pathetic. _

I watched as Crystal hastily made her way to the counter and started to address the middle aged man behind it.

I rested my arms on the table and then placed my head on them.

This was a waste of money and time.

"Why the hell do you always have bring the mood down?" Gold commented suddenly, making me raise my eyes to him. He was looking away, seemingly upset with how I was behaving.

"It's just who I am,"

"No Silver, it's who you make out to be. The only time I have ever seen the real you was when we used to battle together or play chess,"

I fused my eyes closed, trying not to allow my anger take over as that cursed word was released out into the open air once again.

_ Maybe he said it by accident this time? _

I breathed in deeply.

"You don't know anything about me," I remarked coldly.

"You won't let anyone know you or get close to you! I mean, Crystal and I we are meant to be your friends yet... you don't even see us like that. To you we are probably just people you tolerate"

I blinked suddenly, realising that actually Gold was right, and I hated the fact he was right.

I slammed my hands on the table suddenly, making a scene once again, _not that I cared._

"Shut the fuck up Gold! You have no fucking idea what it is like to be me! I don't have friends or family! I have no-one, and that's just how I like it!"

"You are wrong again, you believe that this is the life you want to lead, going to work day after day and just going through the same boring routine until when? Until you die, and then who will be there at your funeral? No-one. And you want to know why?"

I folded my arms and relaxed in my chair, hating this new argumentative Gold that just seemed to pop up out of nowhere.

"I honestly don't care, things like that are of no importance to me,"

"You just keep pushing people away, you push me away, you push Crystal away... and one day you will be left all alone, with no-one at all. Just you in your own sorry excuse for a life. But when that day comes... it will be too late to say you are sorry,"

Gold just stared at me, his amber eyes sparkling in either passion for his beliefs or maybe sadness, _but why would he be sad_?

After everything he had said it was quite obvious he didn't like me, and only tolerated me just like I tolerated him.

"I'm not sorry for who I am." I said defiantly. "...and if you don't like it then you know where the door is,"

Gold seemed taken back by what I said and went quiet.

I honestly wasn't going to apologise for being myself.

_So what if I was a heartless miserable bastard?_

It was better that way, then at least no-one would get hurt.

Crystal returned rather swiftly with a tray of drinks in her hand.

She smiled awkwardly at me as she handed the glass of water over. I casually took it out of her hand and started to drink.

I kept watching Gold, at how he still tried to put on a façade that everything was okay, when it quite obviously was not.

He sipped his coffee shallowly, complaining every now and again about how hot it was.

Crystal sat beside him, not touching hers for some time. She must have had more sense than him.

"I heard shouting when I was at the counter... is everything okay?" She asked, looking from me to Gold.

I shrugged and refused to answer and Gold seemed to mimic my actions.

_Was he trying to behave like me? _

She frowned and sighed, relaxing in her chair.

"Oh come on guys, don't be like this. You two are meant to be friends!"

"Tell that to Silver..." Gold remarked coldly, taking a small sip from his coffee.

I just held the glass in my hands and watched as the water swished against the sides. This was pathetic, and the sooner I got out of here the better.

"Why what happened?" Crystal pursued, obviously trying to get both sides of the story out in the open, but I did not want to talk about it.

What was said was done.

"He says he has no friends and likes it that way,"

"But we all know that is not true, don't we Silver?" Crystal asked, looking at me with those large azure eyes of hers.

It was like she was expecting me to disagree with what Gold said and set the record straight. All I did was shrug and take a sip from my glass.

"It's like... I don't know... he's trying to push us away," Gold mused quietly.

"If I was trying to push you away you would fucking know about it..." I said calmly, staring across at the amber eyed boy.

If I did not want to be here then I would not have agreed to it in the first place, so I guess a part of me could tolerate them to some degree.

"Can we please talk about something else?" Crystal interrupted, trying to lighten the mood.

_Right now the mood was so bitter it could give a lemon a run for it's money._

"Yes, why don't we talk about how Silver is so insecure and worried about what people think of him?"

I literally spat out my water in utter shock at what Gold just said.

_ Insecure? I wasn't insecure!_

"What the fuck Gold? I'm not insecure!"

"Bullshit! If you wasn't then you wouldn't have caused such a fuss yesterday at the Pokemon Centre"

I looked away, furrowing my eyebrows.

I didn't appreciate others talking about me behind my back that was all.

Placing my glass down on the table in fear of my throwing it at Gold's head I tried to remain calm.

"I don't appreciate people talking behind my back,"

"About what? About you being gay?" Gold shot back at me, which once again caught me off guard.

Crystal remained mute and just watched this scene continue to unfold.

I smacked my fist off the table in rage.

"I am not fucking gay!"

"So why get so touchy about it then?" Gold pursued, his eyes narrowing at me, trying to psyche me out.

This was not going to happen, I wasn't going to let Gold beat me like this.

"Everything isn't a joke to me unlike you, your whole life is a fucking joke Gold,"

I watched Crystal wince, like she felt the pain Gold felt briefly.

"How is my life a joke? I have a family that loves me, friends that would do anything for me and I treat my Pokemon with love and respect. What the fuck have you got?"

The metaphorical key on my back started to turn the more riled up I was getting.

_ Family... friends... I didn't need any of that! I was strong on my own!_

I could feel adrenaline pumping through my veins, making my fists tremble. I wanted to hit something, _anything._

"That is why you will always be weak, Gold," I said defiantly, and surprisingly calm too.

He blinked curiously, before almost knocking over his mug of coffee.

"The only person who is weak is you!"

_That was it, this was enough. _

I just wanted to leave and go home to sort out the mess I had left in my apartment and get all my work clothes ready for tonight's shift.

Standing up I knew that all eyes were focused on me, but right now I did not care.

"If you don't mind, I'm going to use the bathroom,"

Of course I really didn't need to, I just needed to calm down.

As much as right now I really wanted to punch Gold into the middle of next week something was holding me back.

_My pride maybe? _

I weaved around the table and headed towards the bathroom, breathing deeply to try and steady my nerves.

All the adrenaline rushing through my veins seemed to make every muscle and bone in my body tremble with anxiety. It was a feeling I was meant to be used to.

* * *

Pushing the door to the men's bathroom open in rage I stomped up to the nearest sink and turned the tap on.

Splashing my face with water cooled down that burning feeling I had received not too long ago. It always happened whenever I got angry, it's just my face would get redder and redder and then I would just explode.

As the droplets of water trickled down my face I placed my hands on the edge of the sink.

My eyes bored holes into my reflection in the mirror.

_God, I looked hideous._

My eyes were blood shot through my lack of sleep, my skin was now returning to it's usual sickly pale white colouring and my hair just seemed to keep getting brighter and brighter, not to mention frizzier.

_ I needed to change my shampoo._

As I rubbed my eyes, trying to get rid of that feeling of wanting to punch someone in the face I heard a creak behind me.

A part of me longed to ignore it and just remain like this, but the more curious side of me made me turn around in the direction of the creak.

_ And guess who the hell had just followed me into the bathroom?!_

"Just leave me the fuck alone Gold!" I spat, turning around once again to stare at my reflection.

"Crystal nagged me to check to see if you was okay,"

His voice was cold, not the usual jokey tone I was used to. I scoffed at his words, knowing that Crystal must have said something for him to start wanting to apologise.

"I don't want your apology..." I commented, refusing to look at the dark haired boy.

He inhaled sharply, as if he was shocked by something.

"Apologise? Is that why you think I am here?! I wasn't going to apologise! I stick by what I said"

I gripped the sink tightly, once again feeling my blood begin to boil in my veins and every muscle started to tense up.

"Piss off Gold, I don't care what you think about me,"

I heard him walk towards me and so I closed my eyes, praying for his own safety right now.

_ If he dared touch me or say anything else..._

"It's quite obvious you do," He said calmly, standing right behind me so I could see his reflection in the mirror too.

I just stared and noticed that he actually seemed a little sad about our argument.

_Well, I wasn't planning on fucking apologising!_

"You can't keep pushing us away Silver..."

"Just watch me," I spat, momentarily glancing over my shoulder before returning to look at my ghastly complexion in the mirror.

_ What had become of me?_

I felt Gold's hand rest gently on my shoulder for a moment before, in rage, I knocked it away.

_ I didn't want him touching me!_

"Why can't you just... talk to me?" He asked, his voice sounding as if he was almost begging me to.

I sighed and turned around, not looking at him directly in the face yet. I was still worried I might lash out if provoked.

"Just leave me alone!"

"Silver... I thought I was your friend?"

I bit my lip in annoyance.

_Friend... that useless and stupid word kept popping up all over the place._

I hated it, I loathed it with so much passion that I just continued to push people away. This was how I could control everything, my feelings, my emotions and the course of my life.

"...I have no friends!" I cried out, literally shouting right in Gold's face.

"This is all because of what happened in the Pokemon Centre, isn't it?"

"Why the fuck would it be about that?!" I spat, looking down at the amber eyed boy.

His eyes were narrowed just like before when we were arguing.

"You have been so edgy and off with all of us since that happened. What, did it hit a nerve or something?"

He was playing with me, trying to press my buttons so I could just flip out and smash his face in.

Again the adrenaline returned and my fists clenched.

_I didn't want to lash out, I was trying not to..._

"Shut the fuck up Gold!"

"Or maybe... it's because it's all true and you are in denial"

I just stared, wide eyed at the dark haired boy that stood before me.

_ Did he... just call me...?_

That was it, I couldn't stop it.

I swung my arm back and smashed Gold right in the jaw, watching as he stumbled backwards and clutched his face in shock.

His eyes were clouded with water, tears probably, not that I cared.

I stood there for a moment, just contemplating what I just did.

_ I actually punched Gold?_

My eyes diverted to my hand, to my knuckles which were now reddened and starting to hurt. Then my eyes shot back at Gold who just held his jaw and stared at me.

Now, he knew I had control over this.

"Don't you ever.. EVER call me that again! You understand?!" I said threateningly, watching at how crumpled he had become so quickly.

Maybe he never thought I would hit him, that he could constantly wind me up and I would just take it. I had a short fuse, it was just something I had learned to live with.

Suddenly, completely catching me off guard I was being grabbed forcefully by the collar of my shirt.

It was Gold, he was glaring at me with a slightly swollen and bloody lip.

I was being pushed up against the sink, feeling the cold marble dig into the back of my legs.

"It's true isn't it?! You faggot!" He shouted in my face, tightening his grip on my collar.

I wasn't scared, just shocked.

I gripped his arms tightly, trying to get him off me, to throw him onto the cold tiles and kick the shit out of him preferably.

_ No-one calls me that!_

My legs slammed back against the sink again and I bit the inside of my lip as cursed words swam around my mind.

_Why was I still holding back?_

Gold must have known by now, he knew how dangerous I could be if I wanted to be.

"You are nothing more than a pansy who looks more feminine than Crystal!"

I dug my fingers into his arms, hearing him inhale deeply.

I knew it was hurting him yet he continued holding me against the sink, trying to make it seem like he was in control.

_No, he just thought he was._

"And you are nothing more than weakling who can't handle a punch off a supposed_ 'pansy'_!" I shouted back.

* * *

Then it was as if my mind became fuzzed over by a black haze that clouded my vision and smothered by ability of speaking.

_ No wait... it wasn't haze that stopped me speaking! It was Gold!_

His lips were on mine hungrily, eyes closed and his grip on me was firm. But as my eyes widened at the realisation of what was going on my legs got weaker and weaker.

_What the hell? Why was Gold doing this? Why was he... kissing me?_

His grip on my collar tightened as he continued to crush his lips into mine, slowly draining the energy out of me.

_No... I wouldn't kiss back! I was not gay!_

I closed my eyes tightly, trying to block it all out. But I couldn't.

Gold's words kept haunting me, taunting me and replaying over and over in my mind.

_'It's true isn't it? You faggot!' _

Gaining some strength from somewhere I pushed the dark haired boy off me, watching as he stumbled backwards and almost fell into a nearby cubicle.

I quickly wiped my mouth on the back of my hand, glaring at him with intense hatred.

_Why the fuck did he just do that?! _

My eyes narrowed as a wave of anger washed over me.

_ No... I had no control over what just happened! That is not how things are meant to go. _

I scowled angrily at Gold, watching as he stood up straight and faced opposite me, completely unaffected by what just happened.

"Why the fuck did you just do that?!" I screamed in rage.

He merely shrugged.

"I was trying to see if I was right,"

My hands clenched into fists once again, and then something hit me.

_ No, violence was not the answer because Gold expected me to beat him up. No, I needed to think of a better strategy this time._

So, instead of pummelling him to death I just leaned against the sink and looked away. I had a feeling Gold would speak again soon, after all, he started this whole scenario anyway.

"So...perhaps I was wrong," He conceded defeat, sighing.

I eyed him wearily, deciding when to put my plan into action.

"You said it..." I muttered.

For an odd reason images of what just happened kept resurfacing in my head, and then it dawned on me.

_ Oh fucking hell, Gold just stole my first kiss!_

I didn't even have time to stop myself from crying out;

"You stole my first kiss you fucking ass hole!"

I watched as he smirked, obviously pleased with himself, which only angered me more.

"At least it will always be memorable"

He smiled, that stupid grin of his and then it clicked.

My plan would work right now! I would show him what it was like to be called a faggot, to be made a fool of and I wouldn't have to say a word.

I walked calmly towards Gold watching as he slowly and cautiously tread backwards, heading towards a wall, which was perfect.

My plan was morphing quite nicely.

His eyes were wide and his expression showed me just how unsure he was about the next scenario. Of course I knew what was going to happen.

Gold soon ended up being cornered between me and the wall and I watched as he swallowed hard.

Placing my hands on the wall on either side of his head I just glared at him. The small cut on his lip had reopened and fresh blood had smeared down onto his chin from where he kissed me.

_ This was great, I had full control of this situation._

"Look... hit me if you want, I deserve it," Gold mumbled pathetically, his eyes trailing down to the floor.

I moved closer, watching as he tried to shuffle his body away from me, only to succumb to defeat.

_Where could he go? Nowhere. _

I neared his face, looking into his eyes once again, feeling rather pleased with myself.

"You would expect that, wouldn't you?" I said rather coldly, almost feeling the other boy's shivers from this distance.

He weakly nodded and turned his head to the side. Now the tides had changed and obviously Gold didn't like this.

I grabbed a fistful of his hair and yanked hard, watching as he yelped like a puppy.

He tried to get my hand to let go but it was in vain, _of course I wasn't doing this to hurt him as such..._

"Ah! Silver! What the hell?!" Gold cursed, trying to keep his breathing at a steady rhythm.

"I'm showing you that you are the faggot!"

And with that said I crushed my lips into his and rammed his body against the wall.

He inhaled sharply at the pain that must have shot through his body.

My grip on his hair was still firm, but not as hard as it was before. I wanted him to admit defeat, I wanted to see whether he was the one who was the faggot.

Instead of watching him I closed my eyes, trying to block out the fact I was not only kissing another guy,_ but Gold!_

His mouth remained closed and firm, as if he was trying to stop me somehow, so I tried a different method.

My hand went limp in his hair and instead of yanking I just combed my fingers through it, trying to get him to loosen up a little.

_'This plan... it's got to work!'_ I mentally told myself, feeling Gold's body shivering under the pressure.

It was only a matter of time.

Then, he relaxed.

His lips actually started to shift against mine, and then I realised that _he was kissing me back!_

My eyes shot open only to find that Gold had his firmly shut.

_ Was he enjoying this? I couldn't help but feel this plan had backfired somehow... _

His hands gripped my arms as our lips continued to collide, and after a few moments I was starting to realise that... _I was actually liking this!_

_ NO! This was not meant to happen!_

_ And now Gold started to trace my bottom lip with his tongue!_

It made me shiver, and I wasn't sure whether it was a good thing or not.

My eyes remained open, watching the dark haired boy's every movements.

But not for long. I could not help but close them eventually and I could feel myself losing consciousness. It was as if it wasn't me doing this, like I was on ecstasy and everything just seemed so fuzzy.

Gold's arms wrapped around me, stopping me from moving. I could feel his tongue pushing against my lips eagerly and I shivered.

_What should I do? If I allowed this to continue then... Gold would be proven right! No... out of the question!_

"Hello?" A familiar voice called out in the hallway making both of us pull away instantly.

His eyes were wide and so were mine.

_ It was Crystal! _

Luckily she wouldn't come in here,_ but... oh fucking hell! This was such a mess._

Quickly I pushed Gold away, watching as he crashed into the wall again and groaned.

"Is everything okay in there?!" She bellowed again.

_Oh shit! This was bad! I didn't want Crystal knowing what just happened! I needed to get out of here now!_

I wiped my mouth on the back of my hand and decided to just leg it out of the bathroom, leaving a rather bewildered and confused Gold trying to recover from my onslaught.

I ran past Crystal who shouted after me but I ignored her.

I needed to get out of here, away from them for good.

_This just wasn't how it was supposed to be! Why did everything just go so wrong? _

Cursing myself I ran out of the café and made my journey back to the safety of my dingy apartment. At least in there I could hide and sort my head out until I had work later.

_ But what if I ran into Gold ever again? What would I say?_

I gritted my teeth, trying to ignore the images that raced through my mind, images of Gold kissing me.

_ It was wrong on so many levels! Why the hell had it even happened in the first place?_

Well, one thing was for certain, the control in my life seemed to keep slipping through my fingers.

* * *

**Authors Note: Ah! I enjoyed writing that drama! I actually kind of feel sorry for Silver to be honest... he is so misunderstood. But then again I like Gold too! I hoped you guys enjoyed the drama and please read and send me a review! I would love to hear your views on the story so far! **

**Oh and it will get darker as the story progresses, I can promise that.**


	3. Mixing Cyan with Silver

**Chapter Three: Mixing Cyan with Silver**

My legs burned with lactic acid as I continued running, back to my apartment. I needed to get back to safety, to get away from the horrible images that kept resurfacing.

The images of Gold kissing me, the images of me pinning him against the wall, _and enjoying it!_

I shuddered as I ran, hoping to never ever bump into him again. I was safe if he was not around, I could just stay in control of everything and that was how I liked it. Gold somehow managed to allow that control keep slipping through my grasp and that was something I hated.

My mind lingered on how,_ thankfully,_ Crystal intervened at just the right moment.

I dread to think what could of happened if she had just decided to leave us alone. But still, I had a feeling that I would probably see her again. She wasn't the sort of person to let things go, and she would just nag on and on until I told her the answers she wanted.

But I would never tell anyone about the kiss. As far as I was concerned it never happened.

Upon entering my block of flats and climbing up two flights of stairs I finally reached outside my apartment door. It was small, and a little dingy, but it was my home and the only place I actually felt safe.

_ Weird I know, no-one would ever imagine some-one like me to feel threatened or vulnerable yet out there in the horrible real world sometimes it did affect me... _

I fumbled for my keys in my jeans pocket, trying to get the lock open as soon as possible. My apartment was a mess and needed a good clean and since I had a few hours of spare time I believed that now was a good a time as any.

Entering my apartment I inhaled deeply, breathing in the scent of must and rotten food from the kitchen.

Sighing to myself I realised that my spring cleaning session would probably take longer than I first thought.

But still, I was back home and safe. I was away from Gold, away from his constant torment and probing questions and back to normality.

_Or as normal as life could get for me..._

I threw out the rotten food and then started to wash up the dishes, which had been gathering mould and dust for about a week.

Then I started to think.

I thought about what was said back at the café, the conversation, _or should I say argument_, about how I behaved around people. It wasn't something I could just switch on and off like a light bulb, it was learnt behaviour, something I just grew up with and it would take a long time for me to ever open up to people.

Honestly, I had no issue with how I behaved or the way I treated people, but it seemed Gold did and I just could not understand why.

_ Why would my actions affect him in anyway? Like he told me, he had a lovely caring family, a best friend in Crystal who hung on his every word, and he actually genuinely cared about his Pokemon. Why would someone as bitter and twisted as myself have any impact on his perfect life?_

I placed the cleaned plates in the dish rack to dry naturally before sighing.

Bowing my head I started to watch all the bubbles in the water disappear right before my eyes.

_I told myself I would not think about him! So why the fuck did he keep invading my head?!_

Gritting my teeth I slammed the dish cloth on the marbled counter and decided to tidy up the living room instead. I needed to occupy my thoughts elsewhere.

I polished the coffee table, which was thick with a week's worth of dust and grime, and dusted off the television. If I left it how it was I could probably write my name in the dust that had congealed on the screen.

I shivered at the thought.

_How had I gotten to be so untidy? Maybe... I was letting myself go a little, I mean what exactly did I have to live for? Nothing really, I had a job that paid well, but nothing else of importance. _

After emptying the rubbish and rearranging some of the furniture I finally decided to sit down on my sofa. It wasn't the most comfortable of sofas, the spring would occasionally attack your butt, but if you sat in the right place then it wasn't so bad.

Picking up the remote I switched the television on.

I didn't care what mind numbing programme was on, I just needed some sort of background noise right now.

Releasing a heavy sigh I rested my head on the back of the sofa, my eyes scanning the ceiling in thought.

_I can't believe I ran away... I never ever run away from anything! Yet, somehow Gold managed to make me a coward._

I bit my lip in annoyance and tried to ignore my own thoughts. I hardly noticed my telephone started to ring until the noise eventually reached my brain cells, making me turn to face it.

_No... I would not answer. It might be Gold wanting an explanation about what happened..._

I would just sit here and ignore it, if it was important they would leave a message.

And when my terrible voice recording had ended and the beep sounded some-one did leave a message.

_"Hi Silver! It's Crystal! I had to steal your phone number from Gold to find out if you were okay. I never got a chance to speak to you after your fight with him. Gold seems... a bit upset about what happened, but is too stubborn to say anything. It took me a while for me to get your phone number from him! I just... wanted to find out if it was something I should be worried about. Gold's lip was pretty badly hurt when I found him and he wouldn't tell me anything. Anyway... I'm rambling... if you get this message can you ring me back? I need to know if things are okay between you two. Anyway, I guess I'll say goodbye now then... bye!" _And the recording ended.

Well, at least it wasn't Gold, then again why did I expect him to ring me?

I sighed and rubbed my forehead.

_So Crystal discovered Gold's busted lip then?_

It really would not take a genius to figure out we had a fight, but Crystal was hardly the brightest crayon in the box. I glanced at the clock, now wondering if I should get ready for my shift at the store. My apartment block was not that far away but, it wasn't like I had much else to do, _and besides... I actually enjoyed my job_.

Getting to my feet I walked towards my bathroom so I could shower and freshen up. My hair was so frizzy it looked like I had been pulled through a hedge backwards so I really needed to wash it.

* * *

Once I was all showered and cleaned I walked into the bedroom, with a towel wrapped securely around my waist.

Now I had to find something to wear for my shift.

Luckily for me it was a pure black uniform, apart from a red and black striped tie. The colour scheme was red and black but, the Manager said my hair contributed to the uniform anyway so the rest of it could be black.

_I wasn't sure whether that was a good thing or not._

Walking into my bedroom I started to search my wardrobe for a long sleeved black shirt.

No way was I wearing short sleeves, not with how pale I was. The more of my skin that was covered up the better.

Once I found a shirt I threw it on my bed and started looking for trousers to match. Well, at least I felt comfortable wearing black and that might be one of reasons I liked work so much.

Once I had found some black trousers to match my shirt and grabbed some clean boxers from my chest of drawers I started to make myself look presentable for the shift.

If you didn't groom yourself to within an inch of your life then the Manager would have some sort of fit.

_Image was everything when you were serving customers apparently... maybe that's why she kept me in the stockroom..._

Still, when I had the uniform on and tied my hair up in a ponytail I didn't look that bad.

Okay, my complexion completely clashed with my red hair colour but, I couldn't help that.

_That was just bad genetics..._

Now I was ready to take on my shift at work, and ready to face the big bad world outside my apartment.

A part of me prayed that it would be quiet tonight and that we would not be inundated with customers. As much as I liked my job I loathed the customers. Not all of them, just the majority, mainly because they were rude, or made comments about my customer service skills.

_Well, I was hardly a people person was I? _

Tightening up my ponytail with my fingers and taking one final look in the mirror I decided that it was time to make a move.

This was the best I was going to look anyway.

* * *

When I actually got to work I was surprised to find that it was only the Manager and some person I had never seen before behind the counter.

_He must be the new guy..._

I forced a smile at her, watching as she finished putting stock on the shelves to come over and talk to me. Sometimes I wished she would ignore me.

"Ah Silver! You are rather early, your shift doesn't start for another half hour,"

"I know, I just thought I could start earlier and leave earlier..." I knew it was out of the question the way she raised an eyebrow at me and stared at me with narrowed sienna eyes, but it was worth a try.

"Well, never mind. Seeing as you are here I don't suppose you could take Cyan to the stockroom to start sorting through the delivery could you? It's his second day here, and I want him to know all the basics."

I glanced over at guy she called Cyan.

He was probably about my age, perhaps a little older and he was trying to smile at me.

He sort of looked similar to Gold, only he had really pale blue eyes instead of amber, and his hair was shorter and spikier.

I just grunted and nodded to the Manager.

I waited for Cyan to actually move away from behind the counter to stand next to me. Biting the inside of my lip I now realised once again I was stuck doing delivery.

_Did I expect anything less?_

"Oh, and Silver!" She called, making me turn around.

"Can you make Cyan feel welcome? He is still a little nervous."

I rolled my eyes.

_ Why did I have to do it? _

She knew how much I hated talking to people, let alone trying to make them feel good. In fact, I would probably make him quit sooner rather than later.

The Manager gave me the stockroom keys and I turned on my heel, not even telling Cyan to follow me, and just made my way towards the lift.

I assumed he wasn't as dumb as he looked and would follow me. And he did, even if it was a little reluctant.

My finger pressed the button for the lift to arrive and I waited, not uttering a single word to the newbie.

I didn't feel the need to converse with him, after all, I was doing him a favour right now.

"Ummm... thank you," He mumbled, his voice sounding extremely nervous and a little shaky. I just nodded.

I would talk when it was necessary.

* * *

The lift arrived and both myself and Cyan walked inside.

I pressed the button that let us go to the basement, because that was where the stockroom was hidden away. It was a pain in the backside however to get stock from the basement to the shop floor via this lift. It was temperamental at times, and had broken down on several occasions, usually leaving me stuck in the basement for hours until someone came to fix the problem.

I stood beside Cyan, watching as he fidgeted with his hands nervously and I just sighed.

He must have heard me because he spoke again.

"So... how long have you been working here?"

I grunted, but decided to answer this time.

"Since last September."

He nodded and that was all that was said.

The lift came to a halt and the doors opened.

The basement was being refurbished so there were a lot of workmen in hard hats aimlessly meandering around. The smell of must and cement was all that entered my nose as I lead the way to the stockroom. It was incredibly small and dusty so if this kid had an allergy to dust then he would definitely love it here.

A small smile crept upon my lips as I thought about that for a moment.

_ That would definitely be a laugh._

"So, what is your name?" Cyan asked me, breaking the silence for the second time.

I rolled my eyes, not feeling the need to introduce myself to some kid, even though he was probably older than me.

"Why do you care?" I replied coldly as I made my way up to the stockroom door.

"I was just... trying to be nice,"

I sighed and rammed the keys in the lock and turned.

The door swung open and the loud beeping of the alarm sounded.

Once I had turned the alarm off and switched the lights on the small room became illuminated quickly. Piles and piles of cardboard boxes stood right in front of me and this time there were probably hundreds.

"Oh for the love of Arceus!" I cursed, slamming the keys down on the desk that was beside the door.

I never realised it would literally take both of us, working together to get through this delivery.

"Is something wrong?" Cyan asked, making me turn to glare at the azure eyed boy.

I sighed and wiped my forehead, trying to calm down.

_It wasn't so bad, in fact I could probably make this newbie do most of the work..._

"Deliveries like this fucking take the piss..."

Cutting through cardboard boxes, ticking off the stock and putting it all away would take hours and hours, and now I regretted coming to work early. To add to matters I was stuck with someone who didn't have any idea what to do.

"So... what do we do?" He asked me.

"We open the boxes, take out the stock, tick it off the list and then put it all away,"

I watched as the shorter boy nodded in approval, like he knew what to do.

"...and what about the empty cardboard boxes?"

"You have to cut them up, flatten them and put them in the trolley outside so then we can take it to the waste disposal unit on the roof,"

I watched his face alter, not dramatically, just slightly, from happy to slightly unsure.

_Well, if we didn't get started we would be here a week past our death._

"Okay, to make things easier and so you learn what the fuck to do I'll open the boxes and take out the stock. I want you to tick it off the list on the desk and flatten the cardboard, okay?" I asked, surprised how well I was handling working with a total stranger.

Cyan nodded and smiled, which for that moment reminded me of someone.

_Gold smiles like that... that stupid fucking smile of his... it pisses me off!_

Grabbing a cutting knife, specifically designed to cut through cardboard I decided to make a start on the piles of boxes.

The cardboard would occasionally cut you and make it look like you were a self harmer but, it gave me an opportunity to let off some steam too.

"You never told me your name..." Cyan mumbled as I started to take the stock out of the box.

"...it's Silver." I said quietly, passing the now empty cardboard box over to the shorter boy, who started to dismantle it.

"Like the metal Silver?"

I nodded and started to open the next box.

I heard the now flattened cardboard being thrown into the trolley, and the scribbling of pen on paper behind me.

"That is such a cool name! My name is Cyan!"

"I already know that..." I muttered, piling up the stock that I was taking out of the box.

I wondered if this newbie was getting hurt by my words, or if he could take it.

"Yeah... this is my first proper job,"

_ Like I cared? Why did he feel the need to tell me his God damn life story?! _

I passed another empty box to him, trying not to make eye contact.

It was weird how similar he looked to Gold.

_They could probably pass for brothers or something..._

"So... are you a Pokemon trainer too?" He continued probing me for answers and I paused in opening the box.

_Why twenty questions? And why about me? Couldn't we talk about something better?_

I glanced at the azure eyed boy momentarily before resuming my work.

"Yes, and so what if I am?"

"Me too! My brother is too, but right now he's taking a break from battling..." He trailed off, as if deep in thought or reminiscing about something.

_Taking a break? Like a vacation? _

Now for an odd reason I felt the need to know more, maybe it was just the nosey side of me.

"Why is he taking a break?"

I watched as Cyan broke down the cardboard box and threw it into the trolley.

He sighed and then I wondered if the subject was something he did not want to talk about.

"He battled a trainer yesterday and told me that this trainer told him to give up battling,"

As I started to open another box I dropped my cutting knife onto the floor, hearing it crash against the tiles.

I froze, thinking back to yesterday's events.

_I had battled someone, and I had told them to give up battling..._

Swallowing hard I tried to find out more.

"Did he tell you... what the trainer looked like?"

There was a pause.

"No, he just said this trainer had a Sneasel and completely crushed him. Then once the battle was over the trainer told him to give up being a trainer, it's horrible isn't it?"

I bent down to retrieve my knife, my body shivering slightly.

Small world it seemed, what was the likeliness of me meeting that little runts older brother?

_Well, at least I was safe for now. But still, it seemed his brother had taken my words too literally.._

"Yeah... awful..." I murmured, taking stock out of the box to preoccupy my thoughts.

"My brother was really upset about it, and I promised him if I ever come across a trainer like that then I'll smack some sense into him!"

_Oh really? Well here I stand!_

Of course I didn't voice my thoughts, I just tried not to smile about it. Right now I had to play it cool and not let on about it.

"You should be careful though, sometimes trainers like that can be dangerous..."

It was my way of warning him without actually going up to his face and coming right out with it.

I passed Cyan the empty box once again and watched as he started to dismantle it.

"I suppose so, but seriously... what kind of person says that to a ten year old kid who has just started their journey?"

I bit my lip and just nodded.

_A person like me?_

"There are some nasty people in the world..." I murmured, starting to cut through a rather large box.

I heard the boy sigh again.

"I know, I just hope my brother doesn't do anything drastic..."

I paused, my eyes widening at his words.

_ Drastic? Was it really that bad?_

I turned to face Cyan, seeing a broken look in his eyes. Seems like he was really concerned about this.

"Drastic? Like what?" I enquired curiously, watching the shorter boy comb his fingers through his hair uneasily.

"I don't know, but... he really took it badly, and maybe I am just over thinking about things..." He trailed off, trying to smile at me.

Now, for an odd reason I was starting to feel guilty.

Usually I would not care if some-one got upset over what I had said or done to them, but this time it just seemed different. It was like I had made the wrong decision.

"Yeah, just see what happens tomorrow. You never know, he might just get over it,"

I returned to cutting the box.

Of course I had a gut feeling that this would not be the last I heard about my incident with his brother. I had the distinct feeling that things could only get worse.

* * *

It took us approximately two hours to finish getting through the delivery, ticking it all off and putting it all away in the right places.

The trolley was full of flattened cardboard and rubbish and was piled so high Cyan couldn't see over the top of it. So that is why I ended up volunteering to take it to the waste disposal unit on the roof.

Not that I minded, it gave me chance to think about things.

_So... my actions had made an impact on some-one else, some-one I would have to work with on numerous occasions. _

I couldn't quite believe it.

Right now the choices and decisions I had made seemed to drag me down a course of uncertainty.

As I started to empty the trolley of rubbish my mind wondered back to yesterday, about the battle, about going to the Pokemon Centre, and bumping into Crystal and Gold.

_Gold..._

I shook my head in annoyance.

_ Why the fuck should I care about that loser anyway? _

He wasn't a friend of mine, just someone I tolerated.

_But why? I never tolerated anyone! _

If I didn't want to be by them then it was quite obvious, yet on several occasions I had put his wishes before mine.

_That is just not like me..._

I rubbed my forehead, cursing at my over-active mind.

I needed to stop thinking about him but, it didn't help having Cyan here. They looked so similar it frightened me, but Cyan wasn't as cheerful or annoying as Gold was. Gold used to wind me up just by looking at me, or by saying the wrong thing on purpose. This kid was just kind of normal, too normal in fact.

I shuddered and started to push the now empty trolley back towards the lift.

At least being at work stopped me bumping into Gold and I just hoped it was a long time before I saw him again. It would give me time to figure out my perfect excuse for me kissing him.

Did I even have an excuse?

_Well yes, it was all part of a plan you see... a plan to prove that he was the one who was gay and in denial..._

Only sadly, it had backfired so badly.

As I entered the lift and pressed the button for the basement I thought about the scene in the café Gold had started the argument and made me so fucking angry that I smacked him in the face. At how I instantly regretted hitting him and secretly wanted to apologise but wouldn't. And how he forcefully tried to kiss me.

I bit my lip, feeling a sudden need to punch something.

_He took advantage of me! He stole my first kiss and was pleased about it!_

It probably didn't even bother him, he had probably kissed lots of people, but I hadn't.

I had never even hugged someone properly!

_Sad... I know, just human contact was a little... weird for me to deal with._

With my own thoughts keeping me company I soon re-entered the stock room to find Cyan sitting down on a fold away chair by the desk, reading through some paperwork.

He glanced up at me with large azure eyes and I just paused.

_What was I meant to say?_

I pushed the trolley outside and closed the door, leaving a blanket of silence to consume both of us.

Cyan returned to reading whatever it was that was in his hands while I awkwardly stood and leant against the desk.

I'm sure he would speak to me first if he wanted to.

"So... do you live local?" He asked, and the question seemed to come as a shock.

_How random, and why would he ask that?_

"Yes, I live in Goldenrod."

He nodded and placed the papers on the desk.

Again he looked at me and I had to look away.

_God... he looked like Gold so much..._

"Is something wrong?" Cyan asked, soundly genuinely concerned about me.

I chuckled and shook my head, trying to preoccupy myself in tidying up the stockroom. Moving boxes of plastic bags from one place to another, just to look busy.

"I'm fine," I issued sternly.

"It's just... I have noticed occasionally you can't seem to look at me. Have I.. done something wrong?"

I sighed, putting down the box I had in my hands.

This runt continued to pester me and torment me for answers. _Why couldn't he just leave me alone?_

"Just leave it, okay? I am fine," I said coldly, deciding that it might be beneficial if we went back up in the lift to the shop floor.

I grabbed the stockroom keys off the desk and cleared my throat.

"We should head back..."

"Oh yeah..."

Cyan stood up and folded away his chair, making it seem like he never even sat there.

I rolled my eyes and waited for the shorter boy to leave the room before resetting the alarm and locking the door behind me.

* * *

Once we got back onto the shop floor and behind the counter it was like a heavy weight was lifted off my shoulders.

Now I wouldn't have to talk to Cyan, I could just busy myself in my work and ignore him for the rest of the shift.

The Manager quickly left when some-one from another department was called in to cover. Apparently a senior sales person had called in sick earlier today so we were short staffed.

Not that I minded. Not having her looking over my shoulder constantly and nagging on at me on how I spoke to customers was a relief.

The person she called from another department was a guy I had seen before but never spoken to. He usually worked in the Technical Machine department and did look out of place behind the counter. He was older than me and extremely quiet and reserved.

Nothing seemed to bother him, not even when customers were rude or made comments. Many times he would just speak very slowly and calmly to them, as if they were merely naughty school children.

"Now play nicely boys, Red is doing us a massive favour in covering this shift so don't give him a hard time. Especially you, Silver"

I rolled my eyes.

_ Like I would do that? She had so much faith in me. _

I watched as the tall older woman left the building to attend some meeting. Not that I cared, at least I knew how to run the kiosk in her absence.

"So... do you work part time?" Cyan asked Red, who hadn't said a single word since his arrival. He just seemed so indifferent, like nothing mattered in his life.

I was sure it was this guy that Gold tried to battle once on Mt Silver and had failed miserably.

_So... he was some hot shot, huh?_

"Yes... Green told me off for staying on Mt Silver for too long, so I said I would get a part time job instead..."

Even his voice was monotone and boring.

_ God, I thought I had issues._

"Oh! You are _THE_ Red? The champion who keeps himself locked away on Mt Silver?!" Cyan exclaimed.

I sighed, not quite believing how stupid this kid was.

I watched the older male nod and scratch the back of his head.

"I suppose I am."

"Are you guys going to do any work, or are you just going to keep gossiping?" I spat, watching as both males looked at me, one in shock, the other in annoyance.

"Ummm.. yes, sorry Silver..." Cyan mumbled, moving away to start cleaning one of the shelves.

It felt good to boss people around, maybe that's why the Manager liked this job so much.

"You seem very familiar..." Red mused, looking at me through narrowed crimson eyes.

I raised an eyebrow in thought.

_ Well it wasn't as if I just blended in a crowd, I stuck out like a sore thumb._

"Do you know anyone named Gold?"

My whole body tensed up at the mention of his name.

_ Even at work I couldn't escape it!_

Biting the inside of my lip I just weakly nodded, trying not to mouth off or scream and shout. Red was still doing us a massive favour by covering the shift.

"I thought so... friend's right?"

"... something like that," I murmured, trying not to make eye contact with the older male. I didn't want him start quizzing me on my behaviour.

* * *

Suddenly I watched the department store's doors swing wide open and a flash of blue darted through them. Then within a matter of seconds I was greeted by an exasperated Crystal, panting and out of breath.

My eyes widened.

_Why the fuck was she here?!_

"Why the hell are you here?! Can't you see I'm working?!" I said fiercely, watching her every facial expression.

It seemed like something was wrong, or she needed to tell me something. Probably nothing that would concern me.

"Silver, I came to talk to you... can you... take a break?" She panted, leaning on the counter dramatically.

I sighed and turned to Red.

His eyes glanced from me back to Crystal, then returned to me again.

"Can you cover just for ten minutes?"

"I'm sure I can cope." Red said, his voice never altering pitch at all.

Reluctantly I walked from behind the counter to where Crystal was still trying to get her breath back.

Rolling my eyes I started walking out of the large doors, Crystal following me.

When we got outside the weather was cool and fresh, with a gentle breeze wafting around our faces. It was also starting to get dark already.

My eyes focused on Crystal, who by now seemed to be able to breathe properly.

"So, what the hell is so important?" I growled, folding my arms and leaning against the wall.

"You never returned my phone call! I needed to talk to you about what happened with Gold, so I figured to come to your workplace instead."

_So it was about Gold yet again. Why couldn't this just leave me alone?_

Frowning to myself I decided to make myself quite clear.

"I don't want to talk about him..."

"And he doesn't want to talk about it either! I need to know Silver! Gold was really shaken up when he came out of the bathroom... his lip was split and he had blood all over his mouth. I figured he hadn't fallen over and hit his head, and that you must have hit him."

I looked away, not wanting to explain myself for my actions.

_Was she even aware of the fact he kissed me?_

_I bet he spared her that detail..._

"So what if I did? He deserved it..."

"But, how did it start? I know you two argued when I went to buy the drinks but... you two never have fist fights any more. It was just... a shock."

I raised my gaze at her, watching at how her azure eyes sparkled in sadness. She was after all Gold's best friend, so it was probably natural for her to want to know the truth, only I wasn't prepared to give it.

"You should ask Gold about that..." I muttered.

"I have tried... but it's like he is frightened to talk to me about it."

_ Did I really scare him that much? Was that why he refused to tell Crystal, or was he ashamed? I bet he was ashamed, because I definitely was. How could I live with myself knowing I had kissed another guy?_

"You shouldn't let him wind you up Silver, you know he only does it to get a reaction out of you."

"... and it fucking works too..." I cursed angrily.

I knew that Gold loved winding me up and pressing all my buttons to see how far he could push me. Only this time he had obviously pushed too far.

"But... you two are meant to be friends! Gold is probably the closest person you have in your life, so don't throw it away because of some petty fight."

_ Ha... friends... we wasn't friends! Friends don't go around kissing each other!_

Of course, I didn't say that out loud.

The last thing I wanted was Crystal finding out about that.

"I will do what the hell I like." I told her severely, wondering if my break was over and I could return to work.

She sighed and rolled her eyes.

"Well anyway, I spoke to Gold today and after some persuasion he agreed to meet you half way and talk it over. He is going to visit you tomorrow morning at your apartment..."

My eyes widened and my mouth seemed to go very numb.

_Shit... he was coming to my home? The only place I felt safe... and he was going to destroy it all, once again. _

I shook my head, wanting to escape this somehow.

"NO! I don't want to talk to him!"

"He is very sorry about what happened and wants to sort it out, and I know somewhere down in that cold heart of yours... you do too..."

I frowned, trying to think of an excuse, trying to get out of this terrible situation, but the words seemed to evade me over and over again.

I sighed, not liking the fact I would be reunited with Gold a lot sooner than I thought.

_No matter what I did things just seemed to keep getting worse and I knew that tomorrow morning would be the worst day of my entire life..._

* * *

**Ah~ poor Silver! Cyan is actually an important character for the progression of the story, and there is a reason to why he looks so similar to Gold. You will find that out later! And Red made an appearance! Next chapter will be very exciting, just what will happen when Gold and Silver reunite?**


	4. Dominance

**Chapter Four: Dominance**

Work just seemed to drag on ever since Crystal spoke to me about tomorrow's events.

_ That was the last thing I wanted! I didn't want to see Gold and 'talk things over', like what the fuck does that even mean? Does it mean try to think of a good enough excuse so we wouldn't feel awkward around each other? _

Well, I don't know if Gold actually was awkward around me now, it was just an assumption.

I literally started to count the seconds on the clock in annoyance while I stood behind the counter, trying so hard to ignore Cyan's voice. He just continued to bombard me with questions and right now I really did not want to answer anything.

"So... that girl, is she your girlfriend or something?" Cyan asked, making me start to lose my patience.

He hadn't stopped yapping ever since I returned and it was really grating on my nerves.

"Leave him alone, he has things on his mind right now..." Red answered for me and slowly I raised my eyes to him.

I watched as Cyan nodded and then literally pounced on a customer that walked up to the counter. I sighed, wishing I could just go home and lock myself away forever.

Even here things were getting worse.

"I'm guessing what happened wasn't good, was it?" Red questioned quietly, signalling to me.

I shrugged, again not wanting to talk about my stupid problems.

_How on Earth was I supposed to talk about this?_

"Well, bottling it all up inside isn't the best option you know. Sooner or later you will just explode and do something you will regret,"

Yeah right, I never regretted anything I did.

_That was until earlier today when I fucking kissed Gold, yeah I regretted that so much. _

I tapped my fingers on the counter impatiently, my eyes wandering to the clock again. Only half an hour left to go then I could go home and wallow in my own self pity.

At least for the time being I would be safe there.

"I just... want to go home..." I managed to mumble, wondering why the fuck I wanted to talk to someone who had the personality of a brick wall.

"That is not the only reason for your misery, is it?" He pursued, and I should have expected it.

My expression was hardly very pleasant right now, and all I could think about was tomorrow morning and what the hell I should expect.

"I don't think it's any of your business..." I grunted and turned away, trying to busy myself in rearranging stock on the shelves.

Red sighed and folded his arms.

"Perhaps... but still, you can't keep all of your anger bottled up inside forever."

"Just watch me,"

"Okay then, just don't say I didn't warn you."

His voice was starting to annoy me, it was so monotonous and dull that if he kept talking it would probably send you off to sleep.

_ Not good when you have a job to do. _

Frowning to myself I tried to fight off the thought that continued to ravage my brain.

_Tomorrow was still a while away yet, so what was the point in worrying over it?_

* * *

To my surprise half an hour passed quite quickly.

We had more customers to keep us busy and the lack of conversation was actually music to my ears. At least it gave me time to relax a little and focus on what I would do tomorrow.

Once the three of us had locked up the kiosk and had grabbed our things we bid our farewells and headed off home.

Luckily for me both of them lived far away so the walk home was very peaceful. I didn't know whether walking home in solitude with my own thoughts for company was the best idea.

But sadly for me that solitude was broken by a loud voice that made me leap ten foot in the air.

"Silver! Wait up!"

I paused, not even knowing why the fuck I did. Clenching my hands into fists I realised who it was that was calling me.

_ Fucking Cyan... I thought he lived in Ecruteak?! _

I watched as the dark haired boy bounced up to me, panting like he had just run a marathon. I frowned at him, watching as he smiled at me like an idiot.

"I wanted... to apologise..." He muttered in between breaths.

I shrugged and folded my arms, not wanting to hear it to be honest. All I wanted was to get home, have something to eat and go to bed.

"It's fine," I grumbled, not even looking at the azure eyed boy.

"It really isn't, it wasn't any of my business and I kept going on and on at you. I am sorry if I annoyed you."

I smirked.

_Well, it must have been so obvious by my expression, or maybe Red had told him off when I had gone to the bathroom or something?_

"Yeah... you did," I spat, now deciding to look at him.

It was probably the worst decision I had made because for that split second I didn't see Cyan standing beside me any more_... I saw Gold, and that fucking stupid smile of his!_

My eyes widened and I turned quickly on my heel, wanting to get the fuck out of here.

"So, I'll see you at work tomorrow?" He asked and I nodded.

"Yeah, same shift..."

"Cool! Take care and I'll see you tomorrow!"

I looked over my shoulder to see him running back the way he came, in the direction of Ecruteak City. Once I was back in my solitude I rubbed my eyes.

_What the fuck just happened? Why did I just imagine Cyan to be Gold? He isn't anything like him... really, okay he looks like him but, that's it! _

Grumbling to myself I walked quickly back to my apartment, wanting to feel safe and secure once again because out here on the streets of Goldenrod I sure as hell wasn't.

Opening the door the my apartment was the best thing I had done all day. At least here I was safe and sound, I was away from Cyan, away from Red and away from Gold.

_ For now... _

Switching the light on illuminated my living room and carelessly I threw my keys down on the coffee table, watching as they somehow managed to not fall off.

My eyes were then diverted to my answer machine, which was flashing wildly.

_So I had another recorded message? _

Reluctantly I decided to see who it was, it couldn't be Crystal again could it? Pressing the button I waited for the message.

There was a pause before a too familiar voice sounded throughout my living room.

_"Hello? Silver are you there? It's me Gold! Well... I guess you are not at home right now, or you ...don't want to talk to me. Anyway, I was calling to... kind of ask if things are okay right now, like... between us? You kinda freaked out and ran off in the café, and I didn't know why, so... I guess a part of me has been worrying a bit. Crystal has been worrying too, and she has been nagging on at me to apologise if I have upset you, and to talk things over. So, I'm coming over tomorrow morning. I hope I catch you at home, but maybe... you will hear this message and stay out on purpose to avoid seeing me... yeah, maybe. Anyway, again I am sorry if I have upset you in any way... and I don't want this to affect our friendship. Well... I'll see you tomorrow then... bye Silver."_

And the recorded message ended.

_So, he was coming over. _

I sat on the arm of my sofa, rubbing my forehead with my hand, trying to think of something, anything right now.

_He said he was worried about me, and that he was sorry about upsetting me? Why the hell should he be concerned over me?! I always act like this anyway, did he expect anything less? And also, we were not friends! _

That was something I needed to tell him tomorrow.

Frowning to myself I wondered about what I did back at the café. Perhaps if I had acted differently then things would not have escalated to that level, and then I wouldn't be in this situation.

But still, I couldn't do anything about it now, I just had to wait for tomorrow morning to come around.

My stomach started growling and then I realised I hadn't eaten anything for a while.

Standing up I made my way into the kitchen and made myself a cheese sandwich. It was probably the only thing I could stomach right now.

As I started to slowly eat I couldn't help but continue worrying over tomorrow.

I hated sorting things out, I just wanted it all to go away and never be brought up again. Of course having Gold around would mean that was totally impossible.

I sighed and leaned against the marbled counter, trying desperately to think of something to do, or say tomorrow.

_I didn't want to lash out again, or even worse blurt out that I actually liked kissing him! God this was such a freaking mess! _

Once I had finished my sandwich I decided to get ready for bed, after all it was almost half past eleven at night and I had no idea how much sleep I would get.

Sleepless nights seemed to be a reoccurring thing right now.

I stripped myself of my work uniform and threw the garments into the laundry basket. I could wash them tomorrow sometime. As I sat down on my bed I grabbed an old t-shirt from my bedside drawer and pulled it on. It was far too cold to sleep only in my boxers and I didn't fancy catching a cold.

Once I had finally settled into my bed I tried my best to get some sleep, at least while I was asleep nothing could affect me or torment me.

_That was unless the nightmares returned..._

* * *

I was woken up by loud banging coming from the living room, which made me jump up suddenly. Turning to glance at my alarm clock it read the time 7am.

_What the hell was going on at 7am? It was far too early to be awake._

I rubbed my eyes sleepily, trying to wake myself up somehow when I heard the banging again. It was now I realised it wasn't banging, but knocking at my front door.

It was starting to give me a headache so I pulled the pillow over my head, attempting to drown out the noise. It was in vain, as the next sound I heard was not knocking, but a voice.

"Silver! Open up, it's me Gold! I know you're in there!"

I ended up throwing my pillow across the room, watching as it hit my wardrobe and fell limply to the floor.

_Why the fuck did he have to come round so early?! And I wasn't even dressed! I swear to God I was going to give him a piece of my mind..._

I struggled to get up, yawning and stretching in an attempt to wake me up properly.

I squinted towards the bedroom door and reluctantly trudged over towards it. Self consciously I pulled my old black t-shirt further down my body so it was starting to look more like a dress than a t-shirt and walked towards the door.

The knocking started again.

"Alright! Fucking keep your hair on!" I shouted in annoyance, sighing to myself as I grabbed my keys that were lying on the coffee table to open the door.

When I actually managed to open the door there he stood, large as life.

I wanted the ground to open up and take me away forever, the way he was looking at me was like he was going to laugh or something. I tried to fight off the urge to scream and shout at him.

"Wow... bad morning huh?" He commented, smiling that fucking smile of his.

I grunted and rubbed my eyes, trying to get the sleep out.

"Shut the fuck up Gold,"

"So, you gonna let me in or what?"

I moved to the side allowing the dark haired boy inside and quickly closed it behind him.

_I wondered if he had noticed my attire yet? _

I watched as he flopped down on my sofa, only to wince at the spring that had probably attacked him. A smirk crept across my face, _good old sofa,_ giving Gold payback when I was far too sleepy to.

"What the fuck is with this sofa? It's a death trap!" He cursed, now deciding to move and sit on the arm instead.

I shrugged and moved to stand by the wall, which was opposite his position. I needed to keep as much distance between us as possible.

"Not in the mood for talking huh?"

_No, I wasn't. If I had my way I would still be asleep, or at least trying to sleep. That was better than being woken up by this dumb broad._

I watched as his gaze fell to the floor and he swung his legs backwards and forwards like a little child.

"Silver... I'm sorry okay? I never meant to..."

"To what? To hurt me? Don't make me laugh Gold..." I interrupted him, turning away to gaze at an uninteresting spot on the wall.

Anything was better than his face right now.

"I am sorry though, but I don't even know how it got to that. Why couldn't you just... let it go?"

I bit the inside of my lip and folded my arms.

"Let what go? Let go of the fact you were basically insulting me?!"

"Well... just chill out a bit, like Crystal said... you will have a breakdown if you are not careful,"

"I don't give a fuck about what she said, or what you have to say for that matter!" I growled, now deciding to glare at the amber eyed boy.

His face appeared crestfallen for a moment before he furrowed his brow in thought.

"I don't see why you got so touchy about it... you know me by now Silver, you know I joke around and say things just to wind you up. Most of the time I don't mean it in a nasty way."

"To be honest I couldn't care less..." I mumbled, now trying to plan an escape route somehow.

I needed to get him out of my home so I could be safe again.

"It just seems..." He paused, as if trying to think of the right words to say. "... like I don't know... maybe you are in denial..."

I jolted upright, unfolding my arms.

_How could he even say that? He kissed me first!_

"What?! You kissed ME!"

"And if I remember correctly you kissed me afterwards too..."

I clenched my hands into fists, hating the fact he was so fucking right.

I did, I was trying to prove a point to myself, to prove he was the one who was in denial. Instead I ended up making it seem like I was.

"It was to prove a point... to prove that YOU are the one who is in DENIAL!" I screamed angrily, feeling adrenaline start to build up once again, the same feeling I had back at the café before I smacked him in the face.

He sighed, and combed his fingers through his mop of black hair.

"Well... it sure backfired didn't it?"

He chuckled and I couldn't help but glare at him.

I hoped he wasn't going to test my patience, I did not want to hit him again.

"So why the fuck are you here Gold?! Are you here to gloat about it?" I cursed, turning away so my eyes were now looking at the floor.

My hair had fallen over my face so hopefully he could not see my expression.

"I came to apologise and hopefully sort out our problems... but it seems you are still hung up over it..."

"I am not fucking hung up!" I growled in annoyance.

I heard him chuckle at what I just said.

"Well, you must be the best actor in the entire world then, because it sure as hell seems that way."

I lifted my head up, allowing my hair to fall back into place and just stared at him.

I needed to prove I was over this, that I could talk to him and be around him like normal again.

_But, could I?_

It seemed like ever since the café incident it just kept haunting my mind over and over again.

"I just... want us to be friends again Silver..."

His eyes seemed to sparkle after he said those words and he had to turn away quickly to avoid me seeing it. Of course I did, and to be honest I couldn't ever imagine us being friends.

We were only acquaintances, I just tolerated him because I knew him. _We were not friends._

"I was never your friend..." I murmured, trying to finally let it sink into his thick skull.

Gold shook his head.

"Of course you was, I have known you for almost 8 years! We have practically grown up together, so don't tell me we aren't friends because you know that is a lie."

I frowned, thinking about what he just said.

_Yes I guess we did grow up together, but it's not as if we went and played football together or had sleepovers, when I saw him I was just civil, well as civil as I could be._

"Friends don't kiss each other..." I muttered, hating myself for saying it.

I knew he would have some comeback for that, something witty to say, to make it all seem a joke. But to my surprise he didn't.

"I guess not-"

_ He actually agreed with me, which was quite a shock. _

I watched as he started to take his muddy shoes off, obviously he thought he was staying for a while, _which he wasn't._

"-but... still, it was a one off so I wouldn't let it upset you. It's not like it's going to happen again is it?" He commented, pushing his shoes underneath the coffee table and relaxing on the arm of the sofa.

I grunted and turned away.

_I would never let something like that ever happen again, I hated human contact so to have someone kissing me... was just... a big shock._

"So, will you accept my apology, and can we be friends again?" Gold asked.

Out of the corner of my eye I could see him giving me doe eyes and trying to get me to say yes. A part of me wanted to I suppose, just to get this all over with, but another just could not find the strength to. My mind just continued to replay what happened and it would not go away.

_Maybe Gold was right, maybe I was hung up on it?_

"I think you should leave..." I murmured, wanting to get out of this situation.

"But why? You haven't accepted my-"

"-and I won't. Now I want you to kindly get the fuck out of my apartment." I spat, standing up straight from the wall, trying to get the dark haired boy to move.

_And he did._

He stood up and shook his head.

"Silver... you over think about things, you know?"

"I said... leave..."

I tried to remain calm but it was so fucking difficult. Everything just seemed to be a joke, like nothing I did was having an effect on him.

I watched as he walked closer to me, making me back up against the wall.

_Don't fucking come near me!_

"Okay, scrap the_ 'maybe you are in denial'_, you definitely are!"

He chuckled and it made my face start to burn.

_Why the fuck did I just do that? _

My hands clenched into fists as I glared at him.

"Get the fuck out of my face Gold!" I cursed, hating how close he was to me.

"Why? You worried I am going to kiss you again? Or maybe that is what you want me to do?"

My eyes widened at his words.

_ I could not believe he just said that! Why the fuck would I want him to kiss me?! _

In anger I pushed the amber eyed boy backwards, trying to get as much space between us as possible.

"Try it, I fucking dare you!" I shouted, watching his expression change from calm to annoyed in a matter of seconds.

"You would love that wouldn't you? I know last time you enjoyed it."

Feeling my heart beat ever faster in my chest I protested.

"I fucking did not!"

"You so did, I could tell. Maybe that's why you are acting like this... because you want me to kiss you, because you enjoyed it!"

For that moment I actually was made speechless and no words would come out, it just seemed to become a strangled whine in my throat and that only made me more angry.

My hands clenched into fists, getting ready to punch his fucking face in if he dared say that again.

"Say that again... I fucking dare you! SAY THAT AGAIN!" I shouted, now feeling my adrenaline run through my veins, making my body tremble.

He smirked, like he was ready for it, ready for the punishment.

"You want me to kiss you because you enjoyed it!"

* * *

I couldn't control it any more.

I swung back, ready to smash his fucking face in only I was stopped.

His hand had grabbed my wrist and stopped me from hitting him. I frowned and struggled, trying to get loose.

_He was fucking touching me again!_

"Get the fuck OFF ME!" I cried, pushing and pulling against the dark haired boy.

"What, and let you punch me? I don't think so."

He pushed my wrist back against the wall so I could not move.

I had my left hand free but I never punched with that hand, it would just be pathetic if I tried. I glared at him, wanting him to get the fuck out of my apartment and to never come by me again.

_ I hated him, I hated how he made me feel, so fucking useless._

"Why don't you just admit it?" Gold cooed in a patronising tone, smiling at me as if I was some naughty child.

"I don't fucking LIKE YOU!" I screamed out in rage, trying to get the boy off me and to get my right hand free so I could pummel him into the ground.

Suddenly my power of speech was taken away from me as he crushed his lips into mine.

My eyes widened and I continued to struggle against him.

_ Why the fuck did this keep happening?! _

After a few seconds his lips softened and it wasn't harsh or fierce any more, it was gentle and it was making me start to relax.

_No... this is not right! I shouldn't be doing this! _

His lips moved against mine, softly, making me close my eyes in defeat.

_ Why did it feel different this time? Like he actually wanted this? _

His hand let my wrist go and reattached itself in my hair to pull me closer. A small whine escaped my throat as I was suddenly being embraced by the boy who I was cursing at a few moments ago.

All my fight was slowly being drained from me, all my control was once again being taken away from m_e... but I was enjoying it!_

I felt his tongue gently brush against my lips, which made me tense up slightly.

_What was I supposed to do? If I let him then... was I?_

I greeted his tongue nervously with mine, hearing a small muffled groan escape his lips.

Soon enough I was being completely overpowered by this intoxicating kiss, after all, it was my first time kissing someone like this. Right now I did not care that it was Gold, I did not care if it was so wrong, I just needed this.

My hands clutched his t-shirt tightly as he continued to explore my mouth with his needy tongue.

_God... how had it come to this? I could even feel my boxers becoming tighter... wait! Did that mean... I was aroused?!_

Without thinking I pulled away, watching as Gold opened his eyes to look straight at me.

He was a little breathless and his cheeks were tinted with a red hue, but I bet that was nothing compared to how I looked right now.

I just froze, not quite believing that we had kissed,_ again! _

_And he was right... I did enjoy it, too fucking much it seemed..._

"Ummm..." Gold murmured, trying to think of something to say.

Of course neither of us could.

It was such a weird situation, and even weirder now I had an erection, that you could clearly see through my boxers. Even so, my lips felt weird when they were not connected to his.

I tried to move into a better position so my erection would not be noticed. Of course Gold was usually a very observant person.

"Bastard..." I muttered, annoyed with myself yet again.

I had allowed him to take my control away, and willingly so. It was unfair.

"I know, but you enjoyed it," Gold teased, still embracing me like I was a porcelain doll or something.

I looked away, hating the fact he was right_, and it was so freaking obvious too!_

My eyes widened suddenly as I felt hot breath on my neck and then lips attaching themselves to the skin.

I leapt up, only to be held in place by Gold as he started to suckle my neck. Closing my eyes tightly I tried to ignore it, to block it out.

_God... why? Why was he... tormenting me like this?_

"G-Gold... get... off... aaahhh... me!" I tried to protest, only to moan halfway through my sentence.

Of course he didn't, in fact he probably suckled harder.

My fingers dug into his arms, trying to inflict some sort of pain to get him off me, but it failed.

_Nothing was working! _

I was stuck between Gold and the wall and I could not escape. I could feel my face burning at the contact on my skin, and I could feel my erection pushing against my boxers.

_ No! This is... not meant to happen!_

"G-Gold... stop..." I groaned, my struggles becoming less and less.

_ I needed to get him off me, but how? This wasn't how things were meant to go! I was meant to smash his face in and kick him out of my apartment... but instead here we were indulging in slightly illicit activities._

Slowly I felt his mouth remove itself from my neck which made me gasp in shock.

A slight ache consumed the area he had just assaulted and instinctively I clasped my hand over it.

_ Fuck! He had just marked me the bastard! _

My breathing was a complete and utter mess so I couldn't help but pant like I had run a marathon.

He smiled at me.

"Do you accept my apology now?"

My eyes widened at his words.

_ So, he was doing this so I would forgive him? _

For an odd reason I could feel my legs begin to tremble, as if they would just collapse and I would tumble to the ground.

_Right now... I had no control whatsoever._

"I...I..."

I couldn't even speak.

His arms were still around me, holding me and I just did not know what to say. My heart was still racing inside my chest and my erection was still pushing against my boxers.

"I'll take that as a yes" Gold chuckled, his face still sporting that red glow, probably just like mine, only mine would be worse.

Having red hair isn't the best when you blush, it makes you look like a freaking tomato.

I turned away, feeling very embarrassed right now.

_ As if I had allowed him to violate me like that!_

Then I felt something else, something warm gently touching my crotch, rubbing ever so softly which made me jolt upright.

My eyes diverted towards to see that it was Gold's hand _and he was rubbing my erection through my boxers!_

"Are you excited Silver?" He practically cooed down my ear, which made me erupt in Goosebumps.

I closed my eyes, trying to block out the feelings that he was giving me, but I couldn't.

The motions of his hand were just_... making me even more aroused!_ But I didn't have the energy or the will to tell him to stop.

I gasped as I felt him grab me roughly through my boxers.

"Want me to help you out?"

I was trying so damn hard to breathe.

I had to keep reminding myself because for minutes at a time I would hold my breath and pray that I would pass out or something.

_His hand on my crotch... was doing weird things to my brain. It was like I couldn't think straight, like nothing made any sense any more._

I gritted my teeth, trying to suppress any kind of noise that wanted to come out of my mouth. He was not going to win, I would not let him.

* * *

Suddenly it was as if my body became paralysed or something. and I could not move.

Gold had slowly pulled my boxers down with his fingers and had left me feeling terribly exposed right now. I closed my eyes, wanting to do something, anything right now but I couldn't.

My heart was rattling angrily inside my chest and there was nothing I could do about it. I refused to open my eyes, I did not want to see his reaction or anything, as far as I was concerned this was not happening.

_But oh God it was! And I knew it so well._

"Ah!" I gasped, my eyes shooting open only to find that Gold was no longer standing in front of me.

He had gotten down on his knees and what had caused me to gasp was his tongue.

_ He was... oh God! Was he giving me a blow job?! _

I turned my head towards the ceiling, biting my lip as the feelings continued to escalate.

His mouth had completely consumed my erection,_ and fuck... it was so hot, as in literally!_ It was like too hot and I could feel myself sweating already.

I could feel my body trembling slightly with every stroke of his tongue against my sensitive organ.

I was determined not to let him know it was affecting me in any way even if it was really difficult.

"Fuck..." I groaned, _hating myself for liking this! _

I should have been kicking his head in by now_, so why was I not? _

I grabbed a fistful of his hair and pulled hard, hearing him inhale sharply.

_ I couldn't help it! Why was this even happening in the first place?! _

My other hand steadied myself against the wall as I continued to not make eye contact.

_ I didn't... no I couldn't watch him do this to me..._

"Mhmmmm..." Gold hummed against my erection which made me jolt upright again.

_Shit! This was not good! I could feel myself getting closer to the edge, and I didn't want that! _

I tightened my grip on his hair, fusing my eyes closed.

My whole body was trembling and I was worried that if I wasn't keeping myself pressed against the wall I probably would have collapsed.

"G-Gold~!" I cried helplessly, hating how it sounded out loud.

_So fucking desperate, so fucking wrong on all levels._

Gold's mouth pleasured me in a way that I had never ever thought was genuinely possible.

_Well.. I had never believed something like this would ever happen to me!_

As the pressure continued to build to a level I could not even begin to describe a part of me wondered how it had got to this, _to Gold giving me a blow job in my apartment like some filthy whore? _

I knew Gold better than that, and this was something he wouldn't do. Yeah, he was a joker and would probably make comments about it, _but I never dreamed he would actually do this..._

"Ahhh... shit!" I cursed, trying so hard not to explode right now, but the longer this went on the more control I was losing.

A small part of me wanted to do something, anything to get this to end.

_We couldn't go back from this could we? Friends don't do this to each other!_

"G-Gold~!" I moaned as my eyes widened and I could not hold it back any more.

I could feel my erection twitching uncontrollably as wave after wave of ecstasy just washed over me, making me breathless.

At that moment I didn't even think about the fact I had just released inside Gold's mouth, _and fucking enjoyed it too!_ But, after he pulled away and wiped his mouth on the back of his hand realisation hit me in the face like a rock.

Trying to get my breath back I felt his fingers pull my boxers back up, to once again cover up my shame, my guilt. I released my grip on his hair, watching as it fell back into place.

Again I felt paralysed, like my body would not function properly.

My eyes locked together with Gold's for a moment before he looked away.

_ Maybe he was ashamed?_

"I'm..." He murmured, but no more words entered my ears.

My legs just seemed to collapse underneath my body weight and I fell to the ground, my eyes still staring into nothing. My body continued to tremble violently, not quite knowing how to deal with what just happened.

_I could never come back from this..._

"Silver? Are you okay?!" I heard Gold's desperate voice and saw his figure rush to my side, looking over me worriedly. I couldn't even muster the courage to speak.

_Once again he had managed to take away all my control... only this I doubted the possibility of getting it back._

"Hello? Is anyone in there?" He continued, gently tapping my forehead with his hand.

No strength entered my bones, I just felt heavy and weak and immobilised. My heart had stopped ramming itself against my chest and now felt like a dead weight, keeping me down on the ground.

_Maybe that is where I belonged..._

I felt his arms hook under mine as Gold tried to lift me up off the floor and drag me to my sofa.

I didn't make any noise, or movement, I just allowed him to drag me along the carpet.

_ My pride, my dignity was basically gone anyway, so why should I even bother?_

"You big useless thing..." Gold muttered as he finally managed to push me upright on the sofa.

Getting a little breathless he combed his fingers through his hair and just looked at me. I never responded, I just stayed in this statuesque state.

_How could I even begin to ask questions about what happened?_

"Silver... you are starting to worry me..." He pursued, trying to get me to say something.

He sat beside me, those amber eyes of his probably keeping an ever watchful eye over me in case I flopped back on the floor again. I was glad I was worrying him, after what he did he deserved to feel like shit because I sure did.

I managed to frown at my thoughts, and decided I did not want him near me a second longer.

"Get... out..." I managed to mutter, hoping he heard me and made a swift exit.

_Sadly, that was not the case._

"What did you say?"

So now I would have to repeat myself and risk my voice completely failing on me.

I clasped my hands together in between my knees and bowed my head, allowing strands of red hair to fall over my face.

"I said... get out..."

He didn't move at all, he just stayed sitting on my sofa, watching my every move. Now I was starting to lose my patience.

At least my temporary paralysis was gone.

"Silver... if it's about what happened... I'm..."

"...out..." I continued to repeat, not wanting to hear his pathetic apologises that didn't mean shit to me.

"But... I-"

"OUT!" I shouted, finally losing all sense of control.

I watched as he leapt up in shock and got up off the sofa.

My eyes narrowed as I followed his every move. He quickly put his shoes back on, not even looking at me the entire time. He was probably too scared to.

Once he put his shoes on he smiled at me awkwardly and made haste towards my front door.

"I'll... see you around Silver..."

And he left, just like that.

I was all alone once again, like nothing ever happened, like it was all a horrible twisted nightmare.

Putting my head in my hands I felt a knot in my stomach, causing me to feel sick. I wanted to vomit violently, to try to remove that horrible feeling that had consumed me.

_Why was it I was powerless around him? _

That was just not like me, and I wasn't going to stand for it. I dug my fingers harder into my scalp trying to inflict some kind of pain, to feel something, but the only emotion I felt was guilt.

That was it, I wasn't going to just sit around and feel sorry myself._.. no, I had to think of something, a plan to ensure my control would come back and for good this time. _

There was no way Gold was going to keep making me feel like this, and I hoped that this time my plan would be a success.

* * *

**OMG! LIME TIME! There is a reason why I didn't write a full lemon :) You'll find that out later on! Hoped you liked the session in the apartment and review! Let me know guys! Thank you so much!**


	5. Spreading the Disease

**Authors Note: Hello all! I am so pleased about how this is going right now! This chapter should definitely please you fan girls out there!**

* * *

**Chapter Five: Spreading the Disease**

It seemed like I was in the shower for days not merely minutes. Even now after that event my body still continued to spasm and go into temporary paralysis.

_ I didn't even know why._

As the water crashed downwards on my body deep inside I still felt dirty, ashamed and guilt ridden.

Gold had violated me, he had taken away a part of me that no one was meant to uncover or ever see.

_ How could I forgive him for that?_

I rested my hands on the wall, trying to steady my trembling legs. I could wash myself a million times with the strongest soap in the entire world and I would still feel used and filthy. Nothing would change that.

I was glad I managed to kick him out of my apartment, but that was just the beginning.

_What if I bumped into him again? He needed to be aware of the fact it was never EVER going to happen again, and if he brought it up into conversation then he was on my hit list for life_.

_'Why did I let it happen? I could've stopped him at any moment if I really wanted to... yet I didn't. Is he right? Am I truly in denial about myself?'_

I hated thinking about things, it just made me feel like shit and replayed the events over and over again. About how he had so effortlessly winded me up, saying I enjoyed our kiss at the café and how I had taken the bait. Hook, line and sinker.

I frowned and slammed my hand off the wall, hearing the noise resound off the walls.

The water wouldn't be able to wash away the sin, even if it would offer some form of comfort. It was like an incurable disease that continued to spread throughout my entire body.

Closing my eyes I tried to think of something, any rational thought or explanation to my actions.

I couldn't, and that's what aggravated me. Deep inside I needed to do something about this, I needed to make sure Gold knew where he stood with me. That I wasn't some play thing he could toy and mess around with and then throw away when he eventually got bored.

I was a human being, even if I didn't act like it most of the time.

_He needed to know that I was the wrong person the fuck with._

I managed to muster some courage to get out of the shower and dry off. I threw on an old t-shirt and a black hoody, accompanied with black jeans.

Deep inside I decided I would phone him, seeing him face to face would just be awkward and too mentally demanding so through a hand held device would be just fine. As I dried my hair off in a towel I wondered if I should ring his Pokegear or his house phone.

_If I rung him at home then his mother might answer and what then? Would I have to explain myself? But, if I rung his Pokegear then it might seem too unofficial and then he might think it was all a big joke again._

Gritting my teeth I put my head in my hands.

_Why were the simple things in life getting so difficult? It was just a stupid phone call, what the hell was the big deal about it? Was it that I didn't want to hear his voice because it would remind me of what happened? Was it that he might suggest we talk it over and try to sort it out, again? _

Raising my eyes to my bedroom wall I frowned.

Why couldn't I just sort this out? Usually things like this would be so simple to overcome, just kick the shit out of him and leave him to rot in hell, job done.

_Only not so fucking simple this time... Gold had gotten right underneath my skin, pressed all my buttons and now I found it almost impossible to be like that around him. _

Standing up I tossed the towel onto the bed and decided that now I should make the phone call.

_'I'll phone him at home because then it seems more formal and he might take me seriously, for once. If his mother answers then I'll just say I am a friend of Gold's or something. Urghhh... friend... did I really have to fucking do this?'_

I left my bedroom, combing my fingers through my wet hair and headed towards my phone, getting ready to ring that stupid idiot and tell him exactly where he stood. I wasn't nobody's bitch and he needed to be aware of that.

"Hello this is Dodgy Deals Limited, how may I be of service?" Was what I received when I rang his house phone.

_What the hell did I just hear? Was Gold saying that? Then again it shouldn't have surprised me really._

"Dodgy... deals?" I enquired incredulously, hearing Gold inhale sharply as if he was thinking _'oh shit!'._

"S-Silver?!" He exclaimed and I sighed, wondering why the fuck I was doing this.

"I'm not even going to ask why the fuck you just said that to me..."

"Well... we keep having prank phone calls... so I always wind them up and pretend to be different services. Ummm... sorry,"

I rolled my eyes, trying so hard not to just hang up there and then.

"It really doesn't surprise me..."

"So... why are you calling me?"

He sounded surprised, and he probably was.

I don't remember the last time I actually took time out of my busy social life to phone him. _Did you sense the sarcasm there?_

"It's about what happened-" I managed, before Gold's loud voice burst through the receiver.

"-look I am so sorry! I never meant... I never... well,"

It was as if he had no idea how to explain himself and he probably didn't. Gold never thought about the consequences of his actions, he would do stuff and think later.

"Yeah..."

"Ummm...yeah..."

_Seems this conversation isn't going very well, but did I expect it to?_

"So... what's up? You okay?" Gold asked, trying to make small talk and to try to remove the awkward tension that seemed to shroud the conversation.

I inhaled deeply, it was now or never.

"I just called to say you better forget about what happened today, I don't want you to keep bringing it back up or throwing it in my face. It should not have happened, and it DEFINITELY will not happen again! I just wanted you to know that."

There was silence and deep inside I wondered if he was genuinely upset with what I just said, or if he was doing this on purpose.

_He would do that, wouldn't he? Or he would just be totally okay with it, like before..._

"...you should come over to my place."

My eyes widened as I almost dropped the phone onto the floor.

_Did he really just suggest that?!_

"W-what?!" I exclaimed, wondering if I had heard that correctly.

_I had just told him to forget about what happened and now he invites me round to his house? He can forget it!_

"I said you should come over to my place, you know to try to sort things out..."

His voice sounded nicer this time, like he genuinely meant what he was saying, but no I won't let him do this.

"No, I can't. I have things to do...important things," I add on the end to try to kill the conversation.

Of course as expected Gold is better than that, he would totally see through my deception and continue harassing me.

"Like what? Sulk in front of the television until your crappy shift starts at the department store?"

_Okay, he got me with that one._

I sighed, combing my fingers through my hair.

"I'm... just busy, okay?"

"You can come over right now," He pursues, making me bite my lip nervously.

I never usually feel like this! I wished I could just be my usual arrogant ass hole self again, but it just seemed to have died since the whole café incident.

"My Mom is here anyway so you haven't to worry about me jumping your bones... again."

_ He is still trying to get me to come over, but why? I thought I had said everything I needed to, I didn't need to see him again to bring up all the guilt and the shame._

"I... don't know..." I mumbled, feeling so fucking pathetic right now. I hear him sigh on the other end of the phone.

"We need to talk Silver, we can't just pretend that it never happened. You can't just phone me and tell me to forget all about it like it was nothing. This is serious and we need to sort it out."

I frowned.

_Yeah, he was right I suppose. _

I hated having this dark cloud looming over my head because of how hung up I was over it. I needed closure and if that meant seeing his goofy grin one last time then I was prepared to do that.

"Fine..." I admitted, feeling defeated.

Rubbing my forehead I wondered what the hell he would say next?

_Like come over right away or in a few hours?_

"Alright, get here whenever you can."

I immediately hung up, not wanting the conversation to go on any longer.

As the silence consumed my living room once again realisation started to sink in.

_I actually said I would go to his house! His house is freaking miles away from me! _

That means it would take me hours to walk there and I would be exhausted when I finally arrived. Furrowing my brow I wondered if this was all part of a devious plan, so when I arrived I would be too tired to go home and he would offer for me to stay the night, and bingo! I have lost once again.

Shaking my head I decided that to have the upper hand in this argument I needed to think tactics, and also transport.

Who had transport that I could easily steal... I mean_ borrow,_ off?

* * *

"You want to use my bicycle?!" Crystal practically screamed down the phone as I wondered around the kitchen, trying to juggle cooking and talking at the same time.

"Yes, is it a problem?" I said coldly, hooking the receiver between my shoulder and my ear as I stirred spaghetti in a pan that was cooking nicely.

"No... it's just a shock that's all..."

"And why is that? Because I never ask for anything?" I muttered, hearing the blue haired girl sigh on the other end of the phone.

"Well, yes... and the fact you haven't even told me why you need it!"

"I... just need it, okay?"

I didn't want her knowing details, after all, Crystal was renowned for her ability to gossip about everything and let her mouth run away with her millions of times.

As I stirred the ropes of spaghetti to and fro the conversation continued.

"... have you made up with Gold yet?"

I paused, not knowing how to answer.

Well, yes and no. If having a blow job off your _'supposed' _friend is making up then yes we were best buddies now.

"Kinda..."

"...kinda? What the hell is that meant to mean? Is it a yes you have, or a no you haven't?"

I sighed, hating how persistent she could be. She was like a dog with a bone sometimes.

As I scraped the coils of spaghetti into a bowl I decided to just tell her we have made up.

"Yes... okay? We made up."

"Oh that is great news! I know Gold will be happy now you two are friends again! Oh, that reminds me! I need to talk to you about his birthday,"

I rolled my eyes as I walked over to the sofa, bowl of spaghetti with fork in hand.

"Don't get me involved in your stupid plans..."

"Oh Silver! Don't be like that! Gold would definitely want you there at the party, if you wasn't then it wouldn't be the same..."

I sighed, placing the bowl down on the coffee table and using my fork to spear some of the coiled pieces that had stuck together.

"I said I'm not getting involved!" I said defiantly.

"Silveerrrrr!" She whined, making me cringe. "You are so mean sometimes! It's his eighteenth birthday! Give him a break, and just... come to the party! It will be fun!"

As I scooped spaghetti into my mouth I tried to think of some great excuse, something like _'I really can't make it, I have to take my pet Magikarp for a walk' _

"...he better not expect a present off me..." I mumbled.

I could practically hear her scream in delight.

"Oh, thank you so much! You are the best!"

_Wasn't I mean just a few seconds ago?_

"So... about that bicycle..." I tried changing the subject, and besides, the party was ages away yet. There was no point in thinking about it.

She paused, as if trying to remember the past conversation we had

"Oh! Yeah... bicycle! Want me to bring it round?"

"If you wouldn't mind..."

I hated asking favours, but I didn't want to walk to Gold's place. At least if I cycled there it would be quicker and it would give me less time to think about it.

"Yeah, sure. I'll be round as soon as I can!" She beamed down the phone and it did make me want to smile.

Crystal was always renowned to have a heart of gold, I just never saw it most of the time, and she was the sort of person you could easily take for granted.

Now I frowned.

_Yeah... I did that all the time._

"Okay..."

I hung up and continued eating my bowl of spaghetti.

At least now I had transport, but even so a part of me was literally screaming not to go. It was way too soon after what happened. That one part of me that I was so conscious about had been unmasked and I couldn't hide anything any more.

Knowing him he was probably sitting at home feeling proud about it, like he had won.

So that was why I just had to go, and prove that he hadn't. If I had downright refused then he would definitely think something was wrong, or he could brag about the fact he sucked me off, like it was some sort of award or something.

_Bastard..._

Once I had washed up the bowl and my hair had finally dried off I heard knocking at my front door. It must have been Crystal with the bicycle.

Taking a deep breath I decided that it was now or never.

I grabbed my keys off the coffee table and unlocked the door.

There she stood, smiling wildly with blue bicycle in tow. She actually got here quite quickly.

"Hello!" She said happily, waving sheepishly.

_It wasn't as if she just disturbed me masturbating or something._

"Hi..." I muttered, sighing under my breath.

Crystal seemed to notice because her smile changed to a frown.

"Is something wrong?"

"No... just tired..." I lied, placing a hand to my head in annoyance.

Now I had no way of getting out of seeing Gold again. The bicycle was here and ready for me to use, there was no point in putting it off.

"You never told me why you needed my bicycle," She cooed, looking at me with large azure eyes.

I folded my arms, trying to get some sort of defence between us.

"... I have to go somewhere..."

"Where?"

"...Out of town."

"Can I come too?"

I blinked at the blue haired girl, trying to think of the reasons to why she just said that.

_Since when did Crystal ever want to go anywhere with me?_

"W-what?!"

"...can I come too? Or is it a secret errand?"

_ Well, maybe if Crystal accompanied me part of the way I could fight off my inner thoughts and use her as a barrier against it? Yeah, I guess it wouldn't be so bad. _

I looked away.

"I have... to see someone, and... I have to go past your house anyway..."

She clasped her hands together, letting the bicycle fall out of her hands onto the ground with a crash. She winced but didn't pick it up.

"So, does that mean I can come with you?"

I rolled my eyes, hating how I was willingly agreeing to this. Crystal had a tendency to annoy the ever loving crap out of me, but this time I could probably cope.

"Sure, but just this once! Don't get any ideas!" I warned her.

She continued smiling at me, before turning to pick the bicycle up off the ground.

"We could both share the bicycle!"

"What?! No way!" I cursed before thinking.

It was out of habit.

I watched as her face crumpled in sadness and her eyes diverted to the ground.

"But it has stunt pegs on the back... I could stand on them and you could peddle..."

Once again I sighed, _how had I become so fucking weak?_

"FINE!" I growled angrily. "But I'm cycling and that is final!"

Once again her face transformed from sad to happy within seconds.

_How could she turn her emotions on and off like that? It was some form of sorcery I was sure of it._

"You're being really nice today Silver, has something happened?"

_Yeah, something did happen... but I wouldn't call it anything good to smile about._

"...guess I can't say no to the girl who actually lent me the bicycle in the first place." I lied.

I just needed a way out of this, I actually wanted Crystal to accompany me there. It would stop me having second thoughts and heading off home.

As I stepped out of my apartment and locked my front door deep within I wondered what would await me at Gold's place.

_Was I walking into a trap?_

* * *

Crystal was, as expected, extremely talkative throughout the entire journey. It wasn't so bad, at least it stopped the dreaded silence taking hold of me, causing my mind to over think about things.

"So you see... I don't know what to buy Gold for his birthday. I thought about clothes, but he's so picky! So then I wondered if I should buy him everyday stuff like socks, but then I thought no way! His mother would buy him that sort of stuff! Then I wondered if I should get him jewellery or something, you know... something that he would always remember..."

"Crystal I am sure whatever you get him he will like, I mean come on it's Gold. He is easily pleased." I grumbled, trying to stop her waffling on about presents and about Gold.

All she spoke of was him the entire journey, _I mean I know they are best friends but come on!_

"Yeah! You are so right!" She agreed, her voice sounding incredibly high pitched.

I rolled my eyes as I continued cycling towards my destination, her fingers gripping my shoulders for dear life.

"Besides... he should be fucking grateful he even gets a birthday party," I spat, hating how everyone was making a massive fuss over a stupid birthday.

I never had a fuss when it was my birthday. I just got drunk and tried to forget about the fact I was a year older.

"Silver... that's a bit mean..."

"No it isn't. I never got a party, hell I have NEVER had a party! I have never wanted one... so he should be grateful he is getting one."

For the first time in a long time I actually made Crystal go quiet.

_Maybe she felt sorry for me? Not like I needed her sympathy. I was used to it, and I liked it._

"...Silver..."

"I don't need your apology's or anything, I'm not a charity case." I said defiantly.

I wanted her to know that. Birthday's to me were nothing special, so it was strange for anyone to make a fuss.

"I never said you was..." Crystal murmured.

"Anyway... like I said I will turn up at the party, but that is it. Don't expect me to be the life and soul because I won't."

And again there was silence and it continued for a while until I turned into her street.

It was her stop and then I was on my own. I would have to face this problem on my own, I wouldn't have anything to fall back on or anywhere to run to.

"Thanks for letting me come with you!" Crystal beamed as she got off the bicycle and stood at her gate.

I nodded, hating all this credit I kept receiving.

_It wasn't like I was a nice person._

"I was going this way anyway..."

"Yes but you could have still turned me down." She pointed out and it was very true.

I could've made her walk back home even after she had been kind enough to lend me her bicycle.

"You'll get your bicycle back tomorrow."

She nodded and smiled.

"It's fine, keep it if you need it. I have a spare anyway!"

I couldn't help but watch her intently, as if she was a test subject in a science experiment.

_How was it she could still be nice to me even after everything I had done? I wasn't the nicest person in the world and there had been times I had been really horrible to her. How did she have the courage to keep smiling, and to forgive me? _

I looked away, trying to concentrate on my main task, arriving at Gold's house.

"Anyway, I'm sure I'll see you around!" She called after me, waving her hand as I was about to continue onwards to my destination.

"Yeah... bye."

And with that I left, back on track towards my untimely doom.

A part of me dreaded that this was a ploy to lure me out of hiding, out of my comfort zone so he could take advantage again.

_Well, that was not going to happen. I was prepared for the worst._

* * *

It just felt like guilt and shame was written all over my face, like I was the one who had done something wrong and not the other way around.

_ Why can't he feel like I do? Why do I have to carry this guilt everywhere? _

Maybe I should go in there, beat him to a pulp and leave, not like he doesn't deserve it. Fucking ass hole. He needs to know he can't just do anything he wants with me.

As I rode up to the front gate I inhaled deeply.

_Shit... I was here already? I had forgotten how close Crystal's and Gold's houses were..._

But I couldn't turn back now, I needed to do this for myself.

As I parked the bicycle up outside the gate I nervously pushed it open, hearing it creak loudly. There was still time, I could still get back on the bicycle and leave, and never consider seeing that jerk again.

But time was slipping away the closer I got to the front door.

It was a simple choice, stay or go.

I lifted my finger and pressed the doorbell, hearing it's annoying sound resonate through the walls of his house. It's too late now.

I bowed my head, not wanting him to be the one to open the door. It would be better if his mother answered to be honest.

_ But no such luck._

"Hello! I didn't actually expect you would come round..." Gold muttered, and I could feel my body tensing up already.

"Are you just going to stand there, or are you going to invite me in?" I replied coldly, lifting my head to watch the dark haired boy move to the side.

I walked inside his home, studying the floor intently.

It had been years since the last time I had been here, it felt so strange returning to a place that linked to my childhood memories.

Still, I felt awkward being around him now.

Gold knew almost everything about me!

_He knew what I liked, he knew how I tasted, he knew... what I sounded like when I got aroused..._

"Are you feeling okay? You are looking a little pale, well... paler than usual..." He commented, making me swiftly turn around.

He was looking at me with those amber eyes of his, studying me, taking in every inch of me. I shook my head, desperately trying to get rid of his gaze.

"No... I'm fine..."

"You sure as hell don't look like it to me. I'll get you a glass of water."

I watched as the shorter boy rushed past me into the kitchen.

_Since when had Gold become so conscious of my feelings? Usually he was so bull headed he would just do whatever he felt like and think about the consequences later._

"Where's your Mom?" I asked, feeling a little nervous about the fact it only seemed like the two of us were here.

Gold turned the tap off and walked towards me, glass of water in his hand.

"She just popped out for some milk and bread, she will be home soon."

In one swift motion he handed me the glass and I took it, grateful to have an object to steady my trembling hands.

_ Since when did I get like this?_

"You can sit down, you know? You don't have to stand around like an idiot. I invited you here so you are a guest!" Gold gestured with his hand for me to sit down and lamely I did.

It was so awkward sitting down on his sofa, which was a million times more comfortable than my own. I couldn't say I liked the colour scheme though, it was so white and pastel blue that it was making my stomach knot violently.

That must have been what his mother liked.

"So... do you want to start talking about this, or do you want me to start? Do you even want to talk about this...?" Gold murmured, looking away.

_ Maybe he definitely was ashamed, just like I am? _

I studied the carpet once again, keeping the glass firmly in my hands. The liquid inside made my hands to get cold.

"It's just like what I said when I called you... can't we just forget about it? I don't want to keep... remembering it."

I turned to face Gold and watched as he shrugged, like he was completely unaffected by this.

"Say we do forget about this, what then? Would we ever go back to being friends, or would there be a constant reminder of what happened in the back of your mind? Would you ever be able to trust me again, or even want to for that matter?"

I blinked, hating what he just said.

_We were not friends! And even if we were... we could never go back to that! Gold knew about my personal space, he knew almost everything about me now and there was no way we could sort this out._

"I don't know... I just don't think we should even think about it any more. I know for a fact we are both ashamed about it, and it was one mistake too many. We should just try to move on, but I doubt we could ever be..._ 'friends'_ again."

I watched as his face literally crumpled in front of me, like I had just told him some-one had died.

_Seriously, I wasn't that important to him was I?_

I took a sip of water and placed the glass down on the coffee table. He clasped his hands together between his legs as he looked up at the ceiling.

"I am so sorry Silver... I acted so stupid. I never seem to think before I do things, I just go ahead and do it and then it's too late. I guess... I expected you to freak out or push me away, or beat me up like usual..."

He chuckled a little, trying to relive some of the built up tension that had shrouded both of us.

I frowned.

I could have stopped it at any time, I was stronger than Gold so I could have thrown him off me and prevented this terrible mistake.

_But I didn't..._

"We are both to blame..."

"You should attack me! Punch me! Be angry Silver! Why are you just sitting there like a broken china doll?" He literally pleaded to me, eyes sparkling in sadness.

To be honest all that fight inside had wilted away like a dying flower. I just felt defeated, used and abused.

There was no way of redeeming myself.

"I could have stopped you if I really wanted to..." I muttered.

"Yes, but you didn't! And that is my fault! If I had stopped teasing you about that stupid kiss then this would have been avoided..."

_ Well yes, I could agree with that definitely._

I shook my head, hating how everything is now Gold's fault, when it was both of us. In fact if I hadn't have kissed him back in that café then we wouldn't have needed to sort it out, and then the whole ordeal would have been avoided.

"I kissed you back in the café... that is what started this whole mess off..."

Gold paused for a moment, as if he was trying to re trace his steps over the past few days.

"Oh yeah, you did."

He chuckled, only I was not in the mood for laughing.

My stupid plan got me wrapped up in this soap opera in the first place and now it was too late to go back.

"Let's just agree to disagree on this, we were both fucking idiots and now we should just try to forget about it."

I tried to move this conversation along because the more it was brought up the more images that kept resurfacing in my mind. It really wasn't helping me right now.

Even Gold didn't seem too relieved.

"Silver... I am so truly sorry about what I did. I was meant to be your friend and then... I go and take advantage of you. I guess... I just got so wound up and lost it, but that is no excuse-"

He paused, looking up at the ceiling, trying to think of the right words to say.

"- aside from the whole collapsing act you did afterwards I can honestly say that...I don't regret what happened. Honestly, I was okay with it...but I am still sorry it happened when it shouldn't have, and I am sorry that I have made you feel like this. But...to me it was okay, I wanted to do it Silver..."

I just sat there motionless, not knowing what to say to that.

_So hang on, let me back up a little here... Gold just basically admitted that he enjoyed what happened, and he is just sorry because I didn't feel the same way? Does that mean... my plan did work after all, and he was the one who is gay?!_

"So...you don't regret attacking me?!" I said, my voice sounding a little dangerous for the first time in a long time.

I watched as the dark haired boy shrugged, eyes not meeting mine.

"No, and I know somewhere deep inside you don't either..."

"W-WHAT?!" I cried out, almost jumping off the sofa and bolting out of the front door.

_He was being serious wasn't he? Well... how the fuck was I meant to act when someone is doing that?!_

"Like you said... you could have stopped me at any time, you could have kicked the ever loving shit out of me if you wanted to... so why didn't you? Were you too ashamed? Or was it the fact that you secretly liked it, and didn't want me to know?"

His eyes burned into my very soul, opening up my insides.

Now I did feel like a china doll that had been smashed on the ground, never possible to put back together.

"I...NO!" I cried out in defence.

_ He was wrong! He had to be!_

"Just get over yourself will you? It's okay to admit it if you like someone, I know for you it's probably the most difficult thing in the world, but... just try to accept it. There is no point in fighting the inevitable..."

"I do NOT like you!" I blurted out, watching every change of expression on his face.

Gold seemed to get closer within a matter of seconds, which made me back up against the sofa.

I needed distance.

"You are not going to lose anything by admitting it to yourself you know?"

I felt Gold's fingers remove a strand of my hair away from my face and I flinched, moving away.

_ I didn't want him touching me!_

"What exactly am I supposed to admit?" I muttered, hoping he didn't try any funny stuff again.

Gold's amber eyes narrowed as he stared at me, silence consumed us for what seemed like an eternity before he said the words I didn't want to hear.

"You're gay."

* * *

That was it, I just lost it.

I literally pounced on Gold in anger, pushing him down on the sofa with my hands around his neck. I wanted to choke him to death, to watch as he whined like a pathetic puppy dog for air.

_ I was not his bitch! He needed to know that! I was in control, I always would be! _

As I pushed down with all my weight Gold just smiled at me, maybe he liked this, being dominated by me.

_That smile did weird things to me... and my glaring act soon changed to feeling rather exposed right now. What the fuck was I doing?! _

My hands softened around his neck, but remained there. If he dared try anything I would kill the bastard.

"Well... this is a pleasant surprise." Gold joked, smiling that smile I hated so much.

I hated him so much right now, more than I hated anything in my entire lift yet still, I couldn't put any effort into choking him. It was as if my energy was gone.

Then I felt Gold's hand's rest on my hips, not moving just remaining there.

I closed my eyes, not wanting to feel his hands on me.

_He had touched me enough already!_

"So, are you going to do something?" Gold asked, raising an eyebrow at me which made me bite the inside of my mouth in annoyance.

_I wanted to, I wanted to punch his face in! But I couldn't. I was paralysed once again._

My body jolted and I released his neck when I felt his fingers trace smooth circles along my hips, caressing gently.

_ Did he have no shame?! _

I closed my eyes, trying not to get wound up, to remember to breathe at all times.

_But, his hands continued to wonder... they wondered over my hips to the base of my spine, massaging and caressing without mercy. Then they moved lower..._

"Get the... hell... off me!" I managed to blurt out, not wanting to open my eyes.

I didn't want to see his smug expression, I didn't want to keep feeling his hands all over me.

"Make me." He replied dangerously, grabbing my butt roughly through my jeans which made me yelp like a dog that had been kicked by it's owner.

_What the fuck was he doing? And why did he have control yet again?! _

Then I felt him lift his hips upwards so he was grinding his midsection against mine, slowly, teasingly.

I stifled a groan that wanted to escape my lips, but I wouldn't let him win.

_I wouldn't allow him to do this to me! _

Before I knew it I had buried my face into his shoulder, trying to hide my expression from view. His hands were still on my butt, moving my body in time with his grinding action and it was driving me to distraction.

_What if his Mom came in now?!_

"S-stop..." I pleaded, hating how desperate it sounded.

"You know you want this Silver..." He cooed down my ear, causing my body to erupt in Goosebumps.

Then I felt him place a kiss dangerously close to my cheek which made my face feel like it had just caught fire.

_Why did he keep doing this? I didn't want this..._

"If you wanted me to stop... you would've made me by now..." Gold moaned in my ear, causing my body to tremble.

_Was he right? Did I really want him to stop, or was it to stop myself from feeling ashamed?_

I raised my head now allowing myself to look into his eyes, searching for the answers I needed. Amber eyes were clouded by lust, half lidded and his breath was hot on my face.

_ This was so wrong...yet... so right..._

"I want you... to..." I murmured, placing my hands either side of his head.

"Want me to what?" Gold asked.

As I neared my face to his I swallowed hard, wondering if this was the right thing to do.

"...kiss me..."

And he did.

It all happened so fast.

His mouth was on mine hungrily, and his hands had now wondered to my back and had stayed there. It didn't take long before he tried slipping his tongue inside my mouth.

A part of me didn't want to, but another wanted this more than anything.

So I let him win, I let his tongue slip inside so he could explore every inch of my mouth in this domineering way. I groaned as the feelings erupted all throughout my body.

_I never thought it would feel so good to do something so wrong. My paranoid self wants me to stop, but I can't. I am aloud to do this, Gold is letting this happen so why stop it? _

Even though right now I felt helpless I didn't want to put up a fight this time.

Gold's hands massaged my thighs, moving over my ass once again which made me push my body down closer to his. He inhaled sharply as we continued kissing, then his hands moved again.

They went down in between my legs, stroking that sensitive area that he had already assaulted.

"A-ah..." I moaned into the kiss, hating myself for it.

For an odd reason my erection seemed even more needy than it did earlier this morning and I could not help but grind harder into the dark haired boy.

He broke the kiss almost immediately as he groaned out loud and then started to plant kisses all along my collarbone.

I tried to tell myself to keep breathing, but it was so damn hard when Gold's hands were everywhere.

But still, I couldn't let his reign of dominance control me for too long.

I grabbed a fistful of his hair to pull his mouth off my neck.

He groaned in discomfort before I attacked his mouth forcefully. I pushed my tongue inside his mouth, wondering if it was okay to do this to your supposed _'friend'_. But it felt okay right now, even if there was a terrible gut wrenching feeling that continued to harass me, to tell me it was wrong.

Gold moaned and his back arched slightly as I tugged his hair once again.

_ Seemed like I wasn't the only one losing control here..._

* * *

What happened next just seemed like a blur.

I hardly remember when Gold lead me into his bedroom, closing the door behind us. Even if no-one was home.

I wasn't even aware of the fact he was stripping me, taking away all my defence and leaving me so utterly exposed. I think my clothes must have been thrown onto the floor and I don't even recall Gold taking his off, but I do remember when his naked body lay down on top of mine.

_I do remember when I pulled the dark haired boy into another kiss and pushed our bodies closer together..._

_I was supposed to teach him a lesson! I was supposed to do something about this, not end up in bed with him!_

"G-Gold..." I whined pathetically, feeling how smooth his skin was against mine, and the seeing the contrast of our colours.

I was such a sickly pale white, whereas he was a lovely honey colour. It was making me giddy.

"So... are you going to make me stop?" He asked me dangerously, sliding a hand up my leg slowly.

I bit my lip, hating how weak I had become.

_I could always turn the tide of this... but then, I could get the blame. No... maybe I needed to think strategy here..._

"No..." I murmured, wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling him close so our lips collided together once again.

Our erections brushed together which made both us us moan into the kiss.

_It was weird... this feeling was so intense I just wanted to scream. I wanted to scream until my lungs burned. I wasn't going to lose... this time. I promised that._

Gold's hips rocked with mine, smooth legs entwining together, _while his mouth continued to devour my ear... my neck... my mouth, whatever he could get close to._

He was making my skin wet from the kisses and his hot breath that washed over my skin.

I desperately held onto his hips while his hands became lost in my hair. As our hips grind together once again I couldn't help but groan.

_This was too much, and I needed to keep it in control! _

Then everything just seemed to happen to fast.

I was so aroused I couldn't stop myself even if I had wanted to and I still had that chance when I watched Gold use some Vaseline that was lying on his bedside table to coat his erection.

I still had time to stop him as he just steadied himself against me.

But I didn't have any more time left when he pushed himself inside me and caused me to shriek out in pain and pleasure.

I never imagined myself having sex with anyone, not even a girl, but having sex with a guy just seemed unimaginable. That was until now.

His hands were holding my hips roughly as time after time he plunged deeper inside me and I could feel it, I could feel every inch and it was a little unsettling.

_Gold... he was fucking me... and I was enjoying it!_

"G-Gold..." I moaned, closing my eyes as my body was thrust into the mattress time and time again.

I continued to have my fingers buried in his hair, pulling his head downwards so he couldn't look at me. I didn't want his amber eyes to watch me.

"A-ah... S-Silver..." He groaned desperately as time after time he thrust deeper and harder into me.

I could feel it, my release was building in the pits of my stomach with every thrust and I hated myself for it.

_I was meant to control this, to be the one sorting this mess out, instead I was going to the point of no return._

"Shit!" I cursed as he had managed to hit something deep inside that just made my whole world turn on it's axis.

It was as if I was on ecstasy or something. The whole room seemed to spin and I was getting giddier and giddier.

"Oh God... S-Silver... I'm gonna... i'm gonna..." Gold pleaded, his whole body trembling against mine.

I couldn't even breathe right now, everything was just taken away from me.

My eyes had rolled backwards and all I could understand was this incredible feeling that had seared through me.

I bit my lip, not wanting to scream out when I did eventually release.

But I did, I screamed so loud it was a wonder the neighbours didn't complain.

I tugged on his hair hard as that wave of euphoria washed over me. It only lasted for a few minutes and then I heard Gold's desperate cries.

"A-ahhh... S-Silver!"

His erection twitched violently inside me as he released and once I had managed to figure out how to breathe again a cold sweat consumed me.

_I actually did it... I actually had sex with Gold... _

My eyes widened as he lay on top of me in a sticky mess, trying to get his breathing back to normal.

_He was here... accepting what we had just done._

And now I had to accept it too.

_I'm into guys...I am somehow attracted to Gold out of all people, and not only have I just slept with him I wanted to keep doing it, over and over again!_

As Gold rested his head against my tense shoulder I needed to think of something, anything to get my sanity back.

_I would have to avoid Gold from now on, there was no way we could even try to be friends any more... and I would have to avoid Crystal too, just so she wouldn't nag on at me about stuff. It was for the best anyway..._

* * *

_**Authors note: Oh My God! Silver you dirty little whore you! :) See, not even you can resist Gold ;)**  
_

_**I hoped the lemon was okay, it was hard to describe it considering as it was from Silver's point of view, but i hoped I did okay :)**_

_**Please read and review! :) I love hearing what you guys think!**_


	6. Opening Wounds

**Authors Note: Hello again! Ah, already on chapter six?! Man time flies! No sexual tension or anything in this chapter, mainly based on character building and feelings. Enjoy anyway!**

* * *

**Chapter Six: Opening Wounds**

_Just keep peddling! Don't even think about turning back! No! You have to keep going Silver!_

_ Forget about what just happened, you didn't go to Gold's house to try to sort it out and ended up sleeping with him. You didn't! And you didn't enjoy it either, no... definitely not! You hate him so much right now... yes, so fucking much!_

_ So... keep peddling... forget about it... forget about Gold..._

I didn't give Gold a chance to try and explain anything after the _'event'_ happened, I just bolted out of his house and tried to get away as quickly as possible. I didn't want to be reminded of it, of what Gold did to me.

_Why did I let it happen?!_

Biting my lip I peddled as fast as I possibly could, wondering about where I should go.

_ If I went back to my apartment Gold might figure that out and follow me there... no I had to think differently... maybe if I went to work early..?_

I couldn't be bothered to go home and get changed into my work uniform, I needed to avoid Gold and Crystal now at all costs. If they saw me again then I might have to confront this problem in the face. I didn't want that, so I figured avoiding them for the foreseeable future was my best option.

Especially Gold.

There was no way I could go back now, no way we could attempt to normalise our friendship, or whatever it was that we had. It was gone now.

_But... why didn't I stop him? I could have pushed him away, I could have knocked him out or something, why didn't I?!_

_ Why did I let him seduce me, and take me to bed? Was it after the whole blow job thing? No... it couldn't have been that. Was it because I actually liked it? I actually liked having sex with Gold? NO! I didn't! Stop thinking about it! _

_Stop thinking about the way he kissed me... the way his body moved against mine... how fucking hot it is to hear him moaning in my ear... how amazing it felt when we fucked in his bed..._

"Watch out!"

I snapped out of my thoughts to try to figure out what had just disturbed me, but it was too late.

Within a split second I had to swerve the bicycle from hitting someone in the street and ended up falling off. I crashed into the rough and cold pavement, scraping the side of my arm in the process.

The bicycle crashed into the distance, hitting off a lamppost and just fell limply to the ground.

I winced.

_Fuck! What just happened?_

I placed my hand over my elbow, feeling it throb in anger.

_It hurt like hell!_

Removing my hand I noticed it was stained with a red liquid.

_Shit, was that blood?!_

"Silver!"

I heard a familiar cry only I was too stunned to make a move. I just stayed on the ground, feeling a crowd of people start to consume me.

_I wasn't an invalid! Stop fucking staring at me! _

As I raised my eyes to the direction of the voice I noticed it was Cyan, and he seemed concerned.

"I'm so sorry! I didn't know it was you! What the hell were you doing riding a bicycle at that speed?!" He cursed, kneeling down beside me to check if I was okay.

I grunted and tried to ignore the burning sensation in my elbow.

"What the fuck do you care?!" I growled.

Cyan frowned and shook his head.

"You scared me half to death! I thought you were going to crash into me! Luckily someone shouted otherwise I might have ended up in hospital."

I kept my hand over the wound, hissing to myself at how much it fucking stung. I probably needed to go to get it treated or something.

"Why the hell were you on the streets anyway?!"

Cyan blinked, as if I asked something stupid.

"I was going to the Pokemon Centre before starting my shift at work"

He paused, azure eyes looking at me all over.

I mentally flinched.

_I hated being centre of attention. _

Then I felt his fingers hook around my arm to lift me off the ground.

"You're hurt... come on. Let's go to the Pokemon Centre. They can treat you there."

"I don't need your help!" I replied callously, removing my arm away from his grasp as I managed to stand up. It was now I also noticed the crowds were dispersing.

I watched as his eyes looked over my wound and he shook his head.

"But you're bleeding... why won't you let me help you?"

"I am perfectly fine by myself..."

As I was about to walk off his hand grabbed my wrist tightly. I watched the dark haired boy shake his head.

"No you're not... you're acting strange. Come on, let's go and get your wound treated and then you can tell me all about it,"

"I don't think so..." I remarked, hating the feeling of his fingers around my wrist.

_It was reminding me of Gold... _

Good job that Cyan's personality was different to Gold's, otherwise this whole situation would've been harder to deal with.

"I'm trying to help you..." Cyan's voice was quiet, like he was genuinely upset.

_ Why would he try to help me? Little did he know I was the one who messed up his little brother's head! Why the fuck would he care about me?!_

"Why would you want to help me?"

Cyan smiled, and once again I saw Gold, standing there smiling like usual.

It made me look away.

"Because I want to, and besides... you were nice enough to help me yesterday at work, so I figured I should repay the favour."

_Okay, I was worn out, and I couldn't be bothered to argue any more. So what if I did go to the Pokemon Centre with Cyan, it would be okay right?_

Feeling defeated once more I nodded weakly and allowed myself to be dragged towards Goldenrod's Pokemon Centre, having a weird sense of deja vu.

* * *

Once Nurse Joy had cleaned my wound and had bandaged my elbow Cyan and I decided to sit at a table and relax until our shift started at the store.

It was weird, sitting at the same table, in the exact same seat as before. When the whole chess conversation occurred and ruined my life.

"So... why were you cycling for your life earlier?" Cyan asked, looking at me from across the table.

I had a feeling he would be nosey and try to stick his nose into my business, but then again he didn't know me, or Gold so it was okay, _wasn't it?_

"Long story..." I murmured, gazing out of the window at the blue sky. It was actually a nice day, given how I was feeling.

"I have time to kill." Cyan beamed.

I rolled my eyes, wondering how I could get out of telling him my problems.

_Or maybe... I could twist things a little?_

"I don't really want to talk about it..."

"That bad, huh?" Cyan enquired, raising an eyebrow at me.

I couldn't help but study him carefully.

_God, why did he look like Gold? Why was his hair the same colour, only shorter? Why was his skin the same tone? It was only their eyes which differed. Okay... this was freaking me out._

"...why are you just staring at me?" Cyan asked, looking a little worried.

I shook my head.

"Nothing... you look like someone..."

"I do? What, as in someone you know?"

I nodded, not really wanting to say exactly who it was. I hoped he would just leave the subject right now.

"Is that a good thing?"

_Ha, well not really, but I couldn't say that could I? Well, I could..._

"Yes... and no..."

Cyan blinked and coughed uneasily.

"Your friend that I look like is a guy, right?"

I nodded and Cyan seemed to relax a little.

_Why, did he think I had compared him to a girl or something?_

"So why is it a bad thing? Hang on, do you not like him? Or is he a relative that you hate?"

"What? No, don't be so fucking stupid..." I mumbled, not realising what I had said until it was out in the open.

_Did I just say that I liked Gold? Well, not as such but in a sense? Oh God... what the fuck?!_

"So... you like this guy?

"NOT LIKE THAT!" I cried out defensively.

Cyan's eyes widened at my out burst and then he shook his head. I really wanted to glare at him, but he had been the only one to give a damn about me.

_ Not that I cared, it was just a change of pace._

"Okay, okay! Chill out! I didn't mean like that... because then that would mean that you liked me too... and that is just weird..."

He chuckled and it caused the side of my mouth to morph into a small smirk.

_Hell, I wouldn't smile at him, no way!_

"And besides... you don't look gay."

"I... don't?"

Now this got me interested.

_ So if Cyan thought I didn't give off an impression of being gay, then that was good, wasn't it?_

Cyan smiled and relaxed in his seat.

"Of course not! You're way too angry and violent to be gay"

_ Okay, this did make me want to smile. He had got my personality down perfectly right now._

"Is that meant to be a compliment?"

Cyan laughed a little at my words.

"I suppose so, unless you wanted me to think you was gay?"

"Fucking hell no!"

"So yeah... take it as a compliment."

While I was actually enjoying this conversation it didn't take long for my mood to go sour.

The Pokemon Centre had become crowded once again, considering it was afternoon. And it was full of people I saw yesterday, people who mocked and laughed at me.

I tensed up in my chair, hoping to ignore their presence.

"Silver... is something wrong?" Cyan asked and I just remained quiet.

I could overhear their whispers and snide remarks. I hardly blended in a crowd and was easily forgotten about, was I?

_"Hey... it's the red headed guy again... the one who likes fucking guys"_

_ "Oh yeah! And he's with someone else today! Man... what a man whore!"_

_ "I know right? Maybe we should go over there and see if he wants to fuck us too?"_

_ "Ha! No way, look at him! Way too high maintenance..."_

I balled my hands into fists, feeling my body tremble as I could hear all what they were saying. Cyan however didn't seem to notice.

"Silver? What's wrong?"

I glared across at the group of Pokemon trainers that were situated by the counter, most of them were guys all around my age or younger.

_I could go over there and beat the ever loving crap out of them, couldn't I? Maybe that's not such a bad idea!_

"Silver... you are worrying me..." Cyan mumbled.

I turned to look at him momentarily.

_How dare they even think I would consider fucking a guy like this!_

"Those fucking pricks over there...think they own the fucking place!" I cursed, feeling myself get angrier and angrier.

Cyan glanced over his shoulder, and I watched as they started to laugh amongst themselves.

"Who? Them? Ignore them, they aren't affecting you are they?"

_Easier said than done..._

"Yes, they are. They think they can laugh behind my back, and talk shit. I'm in the right mind to go over there and fucking smash their faces in..."

"Now Silver, don't start a fight in here. It's really not the place for it." Cyan warned, trying to get me to calm down.

It was no use, I could still hear them jeering and laughing at me.

"They deserve it..." I murmured, feeling adrenaline pump through my veins.

"Do you want to go somewhere else?" Cyan asked, looking at me through large azure eyes.

Well, if I was here by myself then I probably would have gone over there and caused a scene, but I had the option of leaving with Cyan to go somewhere.

_Maybe I should take the easy option this time?_

"Where?"

Cyan shrugged.

"The National Park? It's pretty quiet there around this time and there would be no annoying groups of people there..."

It actually sounded like my sort of thing.

I nodded and stood up, now feeling eager to leave this place. It had been a while since I had been to the National Park, and besides it was a nice day so why should I be stuck indoors?

O_h yeah... I was hiding from Gold and Crystal._

As Cyan and I headed towards the doors I overheard a remark which made me almost lose faith in humanity.

_"Fucking disgusting faggots."_

I paused and clenched my hands into fists, trying so hard not to just flip out.

_ I wasn't going to let people call me names like that! _

Cyan stopped too, _maybe he overheard what they said?_

"What the hell did you just say?" Cyan asked, looking extremely confused.

I bit my lip in annoyance.

_Come on! Say something else you prick! I'll be all too glad to smash your head in!_

"You two, it's disgusting! Don't you have any morals?"

"I don't quite follow... what's wrong with hanging out with a friend?" Cyan defended both of us, but I really needed to punch something, anything, preferably their ugly faces.

I stood motionless, back facing towards them. I could feel my temper increasing, with every jeer, every laugh.

"It's quite obvious dumb ass, why can't you fags go somewhere else? It's fucking gross to hear you guys flirting with each other. God, just go somewhere and fuck already!"

I didn't wait for the information to sink into Cyan's brain cells before I acted.

I couldn't help it, I needed to do something.

I turned on my heel, glaring at the boy who had said Cyan and I were gay for each other.

I wasn't going to let him say that stuff about me, or him for that matter.

"Say that again... I FUCKING DARE YOU!" I roared, my eyes narrowing dangerously as I took a step towards the cocky trainer.

He had short blonde hair with piercing green eyes. He was shorter than I was so that was an advantage.

"Silver... please don't fight..." Cyan muttered weakly.

I watched the trainer smirk.

"That's it, listen to your boyfriend and run along now!"

I heard everyone laugh and that was it.

I saw a red mist in the Pokemon Centre as I lunged at the trainer.

My fists rammed downwards on his face in a flurry of rage. I couldn't even remember why I was hitting him in the end. I was so overcome by fury.

_I wanted the fucking bastard to die, or at least suffer. He would rue the decision to cross me!_

I watched as he wailed and struggled on the floor whilst my knees dug into his ribs, and I continued punching the ever loving shit out of him.

_Seemed like his so called friends didn't care enough to help._

"That's ENOUGH!" Came an authoritative voice.

I paused in punching his face again and just looked up.

It was Officer Jenny, and I just thought to myself_ 'Oh shit'._

"Officer... that trainer started on Silver first!" Cyan literally begged to the police woman.

I sighed and got off the blonde haired trainer, who seemed to struggle for air.

"Care to explain what the hell is going on here?!" She demanded.

I bowed my head and shrugged.

_ It was really none of her business, and who the hell called the cops anyway?!_

"Silver... he defended me..." Cyan continued to keep pestering the Officer in my defence and I had no idea why.

He could've let me take the flack, and my punishment, after all I did attack the other boy.

I watched her eyebrow twitch as she looked at me up and down. I didn't have any marks on me but the other boy did, he was almost vomiting on the floor of the Pokemon Centre.

"Violence is never the answer! You boys should have known better!"

I wasn't in the mood to explain myself, as long as I wasn't getting arrested then that was okay.

"I am really sorry Officer Jenny, it won't happen again," Cyan mumbled as he grabbed my arm forcefully.

At least I made my point clear, I doubted that the boy would ever cross me again, or if he did then he was a dead man.

Officer Jenny sighed and decided to let us off with a stern warning, but let us leave anyway. I was actually grateful for Cyan sticking by me, he could have ran away or left me there to sort it all out by myself, but he didn't.

_ It was weird... usually people just... left me._

* * *

"You were so lucky she let you off with a warning!" Cyan grumbled as we sat on a bench in the National Park.

It was a lovely crisp afternoon, and the sunshine wasn't that intense so I didn't have to worry about being burnt. The breeze was cool and gentle, and it actually made me feel calm for a while.

"I don't care, that bastard had it coming to him."

"But still, you really attacked him! You wouldn't stop punching him! I thought his face would be unrecognisable!"

I smirked, happy that I had done so much damage.

_ Oh well, it was nothing surgery couldn't put right._

"He called you a fag, I wasn't going to just stand there and let him say that!"

Cyan smiled and relaxed on the bench.

"He said it about you too, but honestly I don't care if people insult me. I've been bullied most of my life anyway, so it's just something I have learnt to deal with"

I looked across at Cyan, wondering how he could stand to be bullied.

_If anyone said bad stuff about me then, well... I would just hit them or something. How did he manage not to be angry over it?_

"You shouldn't stand for it you know... you should stick up for yourself."

"I do, but I don't use violence. Violence doesn't solve anything."

I grunted.

_Well, it made me feel tons better, so it worked for me._

"Why did you get bullied anyway?" I asked, actually longing to find out.

Cyan sighed, as if he didn't want to tell me.

"... it was basically the same as what happened just now. People accusing me of being gay, calling me names, saying I was having a relationship with my best friend and that we were screwing in the boy's toilets,"

My eyes widened to the point where they were almost watering. I couldn't believe it.

_So this wasn't a one off, this had happened before?_

"That's fucking wrong, I can't believe you didn't do anything! What, so you let them insult you and call you names?!"

He shook his head with a small smile.

"No, I did the opposite. See, they insulted me because it was all a rumour, so I thought _'well if there is no rumour then the bullying would stop'_, so I ended the rumour and said that it was all true."

I almost fell off the bench after what he told me.

_So he agreed to it? How on Earth did he do that?! Man... I could have never been like that, I get too angry._

"What the fuck?!"

"Weird isn't it? Reverse psychology is a wonderful thing"

He smiled at me, and it was a genuine one too. He was happy about what he had done, regardless of whether it was true or not. He had stopped them from bullying him.

I turned away, clasping my hands together.

"So... basically by agreeing with someone when they are being horrible towards you makes them nice?"

"Not always, you have to know the person literally inside out, know what makes them tick. Then you can figure out whether or not by agreeing with them will make them either continue with it, or find another rumour to busy themselves with."

Now it sort of made sense to me.

_So... if Gold ever insulted me again and called me gay I should just admit it? Then he wouldn't have nothing to tease me about! I could see this working! _

"Yeah, actually that's not a bad idea..." I mused, thinking about if I ever saw Gold again I could try the whole reverse psychology thing.

Cyan nodded.

"It made that one person stop, and then eventually I just blended into the crowd and became a nobody again. So, I don't regret agreeing with the rumours..."

"Were they literally just rumours? Or was there any truth behind them?" I enquired, feeling strangely curious.

Cyan chuckled, like what I had just asked was something stupid.

"I'll leave that for you to decide."

"But that is not fair!"

"Well... you hardly open up to me, do you?" He shot back, looking at me through ice cold azure eyes, and I froze for a moment.

It wasn't like I could help it, I just shut off from people and never found it possible to talk about my problems. I had always been this way.

"It's just who I am... don't take it so personal."

"I don't, I just wish you could talk you know? You are a very interesting and complicated person, but deep inside I know your not that bad. In fact I think you are quite a nice person."

If I had water in my mouth I would have spat it out in shock.

I wasn't a nice person, and never have been.

_ Just yesterday I had so effortlessly insulted his younger brother, and been proud about it! He just didn't know that yet... _

I frowned and looked away, my eyes diverting to the cobbled footpath.

"I am not nice..."

"You defended me from those guys back at the Pokemon Centre, so I would say that was a very nice thing you did. You could have walked away... or joined in with them, but you didn't..."

_Well duh! They were saying it to me too! _

I rolled my eyes, hating taking all this credit for nothing. It was my anger that clouded my judgement yet again.

"Whatever."

"And I know that something really bad has happened either today or yesterday hence the whole bicycle incident, but I understand that you don't want to talk about it, or whatever." Cyan mumbled, glancing at his wrist watch.

We had some time left before we had to go to work, and besides would it be so bad to actually talk about it?

_Well, not ALL of it, but it seemed like he would understand._

"It's nothing to worry over anyway..."

"So you always ride a bicycle at that speed? It was as if you were trying to get away from something, or someone."

I frowned, hating how cowardice I had acted.

_ Why did I run away? I should have dealt with it head on and took the consequences. Instead I ran away like a fucking coward._

I swallowed hard.

"Yeah... maybe..."

"Like I said... I understand that you don't want to talk about it."

I put my head in my hands, rubbing at my temples in annoyance.

_Now I couldn't stop thinking about what happened! I wanted to forget about Gold, forget about what happened... but now I couldn't._

"Anyway... maybe we should head off to work?" Cyan suggested, and that didn't seem such a bad idea.

At least there I would be too occupied to think about Gold or anything else for that matter.

"Yeah... we should."

As we both stood up I couldn't help but feel a little awkward.

_How had we got to this? I actually spent time with Cyan and wasn't annoyed at him. How strange. Maybe I was learning to deal with people, or people who were like him_?

The only thing that I still couldn't deal with was the similarities between himself and Gold. It was so weird how they weren't related at all.

_Maybe I should bring that up sometime?_

* * *

When we finally got to work I discovered that Cyan was stuck doing delivery today whilst I managed shop floor.

Red was covering again and so I was stuck with Mister_ I-Have-No-Personality-Allow-Me-To-Bore-You-To-Death_ for a while.

Sad really, at least I could talk to Cyan a bit more now after our incident.

I was of course lectured about my attire, once or twice, but that was it.

_At least I was wearing black!_

"I didn't think you would be working today..." I shot coldly at red, whilst I started to clean the shelves and rearrange stock.

"I had to cover another shift, seems there is a stomach bug going around."

I rolled my eyes, great just what I wanted.

_ I didn't want to be sick, I always got so irritable when I was ill, well even more so than usual._

"By the way I saw Gold earlier..." Red mused which made me almost drop the can of polish out of my hands.

_Why couldn't he just leave me alone?!_

I grunted, hoping Red didn't pick up on my reaction.

"That's great..." I mumbled half heartedly.

Red sighed a little.

"Yeah... he mentioned something about looking for you..."

I shot up and turned around, facing Red immediately. His crimson eyes were narrowed as he stared at me.

_Gold was searching for me?! Oh shit!_

"Looking for me?!" I repeated.

Red nodded and folded his arms.

"Yes, he said something about... what was it now... oh yes, about sorting something out that happened this morning..."

I frowned and slammed the can of polish down on the counter.

_That was his fucking answer to everything wasn't it?! That we could always sort it out, not this time!_

"I don't want to see him..." I murmured.

Red chuckled, which was the first time I had seen or heard any emotion from him.

"Seems he wants to see you... is it really that bad?"

I closed my eyes, trying to keep calm and composed. One fight was enough for today.

"Yes, now will you just drop it and leave me alone?" I spat in distaste, now continuing to clean the shelves.

I tried to keep myself busy, I didn't want to keep thinking about what happened. It was driving me insane, and I needed to make sure I didn't bump into Gold.

"I did tell him you were working tonight..." Red added in as an after thought, which this time made me drop the can on the floor in shock, and horror

"WHY THE HELL DID YOU SAY THAT?!" I growled angrily, as I turned around to glare at the older boy.

He shrugged, like he didn't care.

"He asked so I told him... "

"Oh for fuck's sake!" I cursed.

_This was a mess! Gold would definitely come here if he knew this was where I was hiding._

"Have you two had a lover's spat?" Red said matter of factly.

I turned away almost straight away, not wanting to tell this loser anything.

_It wasn't any of his business! How dare he do this to me!_

"It's none of your fucking business!"

"That is very true, but you can't hide away forever. You will need to face up to it, whatever it is."

I grunted, hating the fact that he was probably right. I would need to face up to it, and sort it out even if I did want to hide myself away forever.

"If he comes in here... just tell him I'm in the stockroom or something. I don't want to talk to him right now" I found myself pleading to the boy who's personality bored me to death.

He shrugged, but I had a feeling he would do it anyway.

"Sure, if you think it's going to help."

"Yes! It definitely will!"

Red rolled his eyes and then pointed out.

"... you dropped your can..."

Once again I found myself cursing under my breath as I knelt down to retrieve the dropped can of polish and continued cleaning the shelves.

At least with Red on side I didn't have to worry about seeing Gold here, or worry about bumping into him. That was a relief.

* * *

Weirdly enough Gold never made an appearance all throughout my shift.

Cyan left work earlier than I did so it was Red and I who shut up the kiosk.

I didn't even both to say goodbye to him as I grabbed my hoody from my locker and started to make my way out of the building. Even though he said he would cover for me I still felt like he was always judging me.

_Maybe it was because he was the 'champion' or something, and he felt the need to look down on me._

As I literally just stepped out of the department store and started my journey off home I heard an all too familiar voice, then I heard running.

I just froze, not being able to move another inch.

_Shit... I was so close..._

"Silver!" I heard Gold yell as now I managed to walk, and continued walking ever faster away from his voice.

_I needed to get away, right now!_

"Silver, where have you been?! I have been trying to call you! Why are you avoiding me?! HEY!"

His voice sounded desperate, like he hated the silent treatment I was giving him.

I just continued to walk, feeling the cold breeze wash over me, chilling me to the bone.

"What did I do Silver? What the hell's wrong? Hey! Wait up!"

Gold managed somehow to catch up to me and now was purposely blocking my way.

I closed my eyes, trying so hard not to flip out again.

_I didn't want to see him ever again! I didn't want to relive those memories._

"What the hell is wrong with you Silver? Why are you acting like this? Is it because of this morning? Is it because we-"

"SHUT UP!" I yelled angrily, not wanting to hear any more.

He had said enough.

I closed my eyes once again and tried to breathe properly. Seemed that this irregular breathing routine was becoming something of a habit.

_I have to do what Red says! I have to face up to this! I need to tell Gold!_

"We can't ever be friends any more!"

Gold looked hurt by what I said, like he didn't know it was coming.

_Did he really think it would be so easy to turn back time and forget about the fact we had sex with each other?_

"What do you mean? I thought... we were okay? I thought you wanted us to move on and try to sort it out?"

"What constitutes to being okay Gold? The fact that we had sex means it sure as hell isn't okay! Supposed_ 'friends'_ don't do that!"

"But... I thought that maybe things were better because of that...because you wanted it too..."

I bit the inside of my mouth, suppressing the need to curse at the amber eyed boy.

I made an attempt to move away from him only Gold blocked my path once again. I glared at him.

"Don't be a fucking idiot for once in your stupid life, and leave me the hell alone!"

For that moment Gold looked like a dog that had been kicked by it's owner and was trying to make things better. That would never work.

I managed to push past Gold, making my way back home.

I didn't want him anywhere near me ever again.

_I can't even look at him, because if I do that 'scene' replays in my freakin' head! Over and over again!_

_Just keep walking, ignore the shouts and cries behind you, ignore the fact he is still trying to get your attention, and please ignore the fact he is running after you! Just get home, get back to normality and safety. Forget about Gold... forget about everything, because if I keep opening up this wound it will never heal. Never._

* * *

**Authors Note: Oh what will happen next? Seems like Gold won't let this die will he? Awww nice that Silver and Cyan are getting along :) Read and review please! Thank you!**_  
_


	7. My Perfect Muse

**Authors Note: Hello! Short chapter but it's Lemon time! :)**

* * *

**Chapter Seven: My Perfect Muse**

I had only been in my apartment for about ten minutes, and Gold had been knocking my front door for at least five. I rolled my eyes, keeping my back against the door, feeling every tremor his fist rang through the wooden frame.

_Why wouldn't he just give up? Couldn't he go and bother someone else? I'm sure Crystal would have loved this attention._

"Silver, quit being a stuck up prick and open the door!" I heard Gold yell as he rammed his fists against my door for the hundredth time.

I prayed that some-one in the apartments above would hear his yelling and report him or something. At least then he would be off my door step.

I sighed, placing my hand to my head.

_Why couldn't I just move on? Gold just had to make this situation worse._

"I'm not going to give up, you hear that?! I'll keep knocking your door until the cops literally drag me away!"

_Okay so the begging didn't work, the nagging didn't either, so what was he going to demand for me to let him in, or even attempt to threaten me? _

_Yeah, he would do that wouldn't he, because that would probably piss me off the most._

I hated how he knew exactly what buttons to press, all the damn time.

"Silveeerrrrr!" He whined.

_Fucking hell, he's whining like a dog now!_

The banging continued and it was starting to give me a headache.

_God, he is so stubborn! Most people would have got the hint by now, but not him. _

"Please let me in..."

His voice was quieter this time, maybe because he knew the neighbours would complain or call the police. I placed my ear against the door, feeling the tremors subside.

_He stopped knocking?_

"If you let me in... we could play chess?"

My eyes widened as I knew exactly what he meant.

_He didn't mean play chess in the literal sense, no... he meant the way everyone else saw it back at the Pokemon Centre!_

I bit my lip, trying so hard not to open the door and punch him square in the face.

_He knew that got to me, that's why he did it! _

"We could start off nice and slow... and I'll even let you decide who goes first"

I balled my hands into fists as I could feel my body trembling.

_Was it with rage? I wasn't so sure. _

Gold's voice was low, just loud enough for me to hear, but still did he really think this would achieve anything?

I looked up at the ceiling, wondering what exactly I should do.

_Should I let him continue begging?_

"You know you want that Silver..." He cooed from behind the door and a cold shiver washed over my body.

_His voice... it did weird things to me, especially then._

It was a low and seductive tone I have never heard from him before.

I swallowed hard, trying to block out the mental images that haunted my mind.

_Images of us kissing roughly on his living room sofa... images of him leading me into his bedroom... and images of Gold fucking me in his bed..._

"Come on Silver...you know you want us to do that again... we could fuck in your bed this time... wake up the neighbourhood... no-one needs to know about us..."

I fused my eyes shut as his voice continued to taunt me.

Those blasted images returned, and with a revenge. My mind was a blur of both reality and fantasy, and the longer this progressed the more sanity and control I was losing.

_No-one would need to know?_

"I promise I'll make you feel good, and we could do it anywhere you want to..."

I placed my hand to my head, tightening my grip on my hair, wanting to drown out his voice with anything right now. My heart was starting to pulsate faster in my chest with every passing second, and I had no idea why.

_Was it the fact that I had Gold eating out of the palm of my hand right now? He was at my front door, begging me for sex, and I hadn't done anything. Maybe this plan could work... _

I waited a little longer, for him to say something else, and he did.

"It could be our dirty little secret..." I heard him chuckle afterwards and I knew it was all a big joke to him, but it still got to me.

I frowned to myself, hating how wound up I had become.

_Teach him a lesson Silver! Make him rue his decision for messing with you!_

Slowly I unlocked the door, wondering if Gold seemed relived right now, or worried.

_Maybe a bit of both?_

When I opened the door I saw him sitting on the floor, back towards me, not even paying attention.

_Was this some sort of trick?_

I nudged him in the back with my foot, watching as he turned around quickly. His amber eyes widened as immediately he got up off the floor and brushed himself off.

I narrowed my eyes at him, wondering what the fuck I was doing.

"Don't you have anything better to do than pine at my front door step?" I shot coldly at the dark haired boy.

He scratched the back of his head nervously.

"Not really..."

"Go home Gold... you're making the place look untidy."

He frowned and pouted at my words.

_Why the hell was he doing that?!_

"Why would I want to go home when I can stay here tormenting you?"

I glared at him and folded my arms.

_So that's what it was, tormenting?! That's it! I'll make him pay for that!_

"Is that all it is to you? So, you don't actually want to fuck me then?"

_I could've smiled so wide just then. The look on Gold's face was priceless._

His mouth opened and closed like a fish, like he had no idea what to say to that. He looked away, almost embarrassed at what I said.

"I... never said that..."

"So, you do want to fuck me then?"

I watched as his cheeks got redder and redder and I knew I had him right where I wanted him. I raised an eyebrow at the amber eyed boy, watching how he got so flustered over what I said.

He was definitely in denial, no doubt about it.

"Well I... Ummmm..."

Sighing to myself I reached out and grabbed Gold by the collar of his t-shirt and dragged him inside my apartment, shutting the door behind us.

Once we were both safely inside I let go, watching how his face continued to change expressions. One minute it would be confused, the next it would be embarrassed.

"You said I get to decide when and where..." I said dangerously.

Gold looked up at me through large amber eyes. He almost looked a little worried.

_Now why would he be worried?_

"You're being serious, aren't you?"

"Were you being serious when you were begging me to open the front door?" I shot back, nearing my face to his.

He looked away, almost frightened to get close to me. Maybe he knew I had my control back, all thanks to him.

Gold remained silent, like his lips were stitched shut and he couldn't open them. I smirked, happy with what I had accomplished already.

_But no, this was only the beginning._

* * *

I grabbed hold of his wrist and lead the way to my bedroom, wishfully hoping that Gold was shitting bricks right now.

Last time I wasn't prepared, I wasn't ready for his advances. This time he had left himself wide open, and I had a back up plan.

I pushed the dark haired boy down so he was sitting on my bed, looking up at me with a startled expression.

_Did he think I was going to murder him or something?_

"You don't have to look at me like that, I'm not going to murder you or anything..."

I moved to sit beside him, watching how he had started to shuffle away.

_Oh, having second thoughts are we?_

"I just didn't think... you would... wanna..."

"I wouldn't what? I wouldn't want to do it again?"

I watched as he swallowed hard, now realising he had nowhere to go.

My fingers hooked around his wrist as I moved closer to the dark haired boy. I neared my face to his, watching as his eyes became half lidded. Our lips were barely inches apart, but he still tried to fight back.

_He won't take the bait just yet, will he?_

"So... you do?"

I rolled my eyes and just attacked his lips forcefully.

A muffled noise escaped Gold's mouth as the weight of my body pushed him down onto my bed.

_ It is weird, to actually be the one to start it off this time, I know that I have kissed him before but this time it feels different. I feels a lot more controlled._

It took a while for Gold to relax into the kiss, but when he did he wrapped his arms around my neck, pushing our mouths even closer.

After a few seconds Gold decided it was time to take it to the next stage and slowly manoeuvred his tongue inside my mouth. I inhaled quickly, trying to remember to breathe at all times. I didn't really fancy the idea of passing out half way through.

My hands reached up and started to tug on Gold's t-shirt. It was just instinct and at the time my mind was so fogged over I couldn't even think straight.

My fingers pulled the garment further up his body as the kiss intensified. His skin was so much darker than my own, and the contrast was extremely noticeable.

_Don't get me wrong he wasn't toned in anyway, he was just average, but there was something pleasing about seeing tanned skin underneath me._

His arms untangled themselves from around my neck and his hands started to pull on my jeans.

_ Looked to me like some-one was eager._

With my free hand I helped the dark haired boy unbutton the item of clothing and felt his fingers slowly and tentatively drag them down my legs.

I closed my eyes, shuffling slightly to kick off the annoying piece of clothing onto the floor, and started to suckle on his tongue. Gold inhaled sharply and groaned into the kiss, hands wondering all over me, from up my back to towards the base of my spine.

Eventually they stayed on my butt, slowly caressing and massaging.

I tried so hard not to make some sort of noise, I didn't want Gold to know he was actually affecting me.

Breaking away from the kiss I sat upright, my legs being either side of Gold's body.

His lips were reddened from where we had kissed and his eyes were narrowed with lust.

Smirking to myself I started to slide his t-shirt up his body once again, secretly admiring the tanned skin underneath. It didn't take long for Gold to catch on and, with a little help from him the garment was tossed onto the floor.

I decided that it would be me who would remove my black hoody, given my injury.

Slowly I pulled the zipper down and started to take it off. Gold's eyes stayed glued to me, like I was everything to him for that brief moment.

_ Then everything shattered._

"What happened to your arm?"

I glanced at the bandage for a moment before shrugging it off.

"Nothing major, forget about it..."

My fingers brushed over his as I grabbed his hand, moving it closer towards my own t-shirt.

"Do you want to help me take it off?"

Gold didn't say anything, he didn't have to.

Within a matter of seconds I was sitting on top of a flustered dark haired boy shirtless.

_It was weird, usually I would have been so terribly self conscious over this, but right now I didn't feel judged. I felt in control._

I started work on dragging his shorts down, wanting him to be just as exposed as I was right now. Gold didn't object, he allowed me to strip him of his defence.

_Maybe he was enjoying this too much?_

Once the shorts were discarded along with the rest of our clothing I pushed my body closer to his, hearing him inhale sharply.

Our eyes met and I knew deep inside that my plan was going to work this time.

_After this Gold would ultimately be MINE_.

Our mouths connected again as his fingers became lost in my hair.

Meanwhile I had other plans.

My hands had wondered and now started to pull Gold's white cotton boxers downwards, slowly. I could feel his erection rubbing against my leg so I knew he was more than just a little excited.

I smirked into the kiss, hearing the amber eyed boy groan as his boxers were left dangling around his ankles. Right now I felt so in control it was unreal.

I grind my hips into Gold, hearing him breathe deeply as his erection brushed against my leg once again. His fingers let go of my hair and danced down my spine, sending a shiver through my body.

His hands moved lower until they were just above the waistband of my boxers and he stayed there. It was like he was waiting for me to do something, or say something.

Burying my fingers in his black hair I pulled him deeper into the kiss, allowing my tongue to tease the contours of his mouth. A gasp escaped into the air as he allowed his hands to wonder underneath my boxers in an attempt to pull them down.

_ I never really imagined that this would have become part of my plan in the long run, luring Gold into having sex with me, and then ultimately becoming my bitch. But, it seemed like the best option right now. _

As I broke away from the kiss I felt Gold begin to slide my boxers down my legs, sending a cold shiver to dance throughout my body.

When I had managed to kick the annoying item of clothing off I moved to lie beside Gold, pulling our bodies closer together.

"Do you want me, Gold?" I asked in a low voice, hoping it really got underneath his skin like he had been doing to me.

His eyes widened as a small faint blush tinted his cheeks.

_Maybe he was unsure of what to say? Did he think I would go mental if he said yes, or no?_

"Well... I..."

"It's a simple question Gold..."

I shuffled closer to the dark haired boy, feeling our erections brush together slightly. The feelings that coursed through me were a combination of lust and of course pride, I was proud of the fact I was controlling this.

"I... y-yes... I do..." Gold finally answered, moving his face closer so he could kiss my lips again.

My hands crawled up his back, feeling soft skin underneath my fingertips. At least I knew he definitely wanted me.

I broke away from the kiss once again, loving how I had him right where I wanted him.

Closing my eyes I muttered a little breathless.

"Then touch me..."

Gold seemed a little hesitant, like he was unsure whether or not he should actually do it. His hand was resting on my hip and stayed there, even though I wanted him to touch me.

Rolling my eyes I hooked my fingers around his wrist and pulled his hand closer to my erection, watching his eyes widen.

_ Did he really believe I didn't want this?_

"Touch me Gold... you know you want to..." I cooed down his ear, placing his hand over my sensitive organ.

I helped him slide his fingers around my length, and prompted him to move. Closing my eyes I relaxed into the pillows, my hand releasing his as the motions caused a hurricane of emotions to wash over me.

_ Right now I didn't think about Gold, I didn't think about what we were doing, all I could think about was this indescribable feeling. _

The movements were slow and gentle to start off with, but soon enough the pace quickened. I groaned, pushing my forehead against the crook of his neck as my hands clutched his shoulders tightly.

_God... this was so..._

"Silver..." Gold murmured quietly into my ear as the motions of his hand was slowly driving me to distraction.

Sweat beads were beginning to form on my body as I tried so hard not to show it was affecting me. I needed to be the one in control here.

_But... oh God... he is so good at this!_

"G-Gold... remember your promise?" I managed to say in between deep breaths.

His hand stopped moving around my erection, which throbbed violently. I refused to look at him and remained concealed from his view.

"My promise?" He repeated.

I nodded and shuffled closer, rubbing my nose into his neck gently.

"You promised me... that you would make me feel good..."

I felt his body move away which made me open my eyes.

_That look in his eyes, I had seen it before. He was thinking...no contemplating his next move. Was it because he was unsure of what to do?_

His hand released my erection and I groaned.

Right now I needed more, the lust was clouding my thoughts.

Gold's hands manoeuvred my position so I was lying on my back and he was above me.

"You really mean this?" Gold asked, his hair now flopping over his face as he leant over me.

I rolled my eyes.

_No, of course I was joking. _

Wrapping my arms around his neck I pulled his face closer.

"Yes... I do."

I relaxed into the pillow, closing my eyes to the rest of the world.

I didn't need to see what was going to happen I just needed to feel it, I needed to know my plan was working.

_And it was, beautifully. _

Slowly and nervously I felt one of Gold's fingers push against my entrance. I tensed slightly but found myself settling down.

_ Wasn't I the one in control of this situation?_

Once he had successfully pushed inside I took a deep breath.

_Man, this was weird...but still, remember to always breathe!_

I tightened my grip on his neck, pulling his head lower to me as he started to wiggle his finger inside me.

_It was like he was testing the water in a hot tub or something. _

In response I found myself biting down on Gold's neck in annoyance. I was growing impatient.

I heard him yelp slightly but once his finger moved rhythmically inside me I found that my mouth just stopped working.

_Oh my God...why is he doing this to me?_

After a while I decided that I wanted more than what Gold was giving me. He needed to know that I was in control of this whole situation.

Grabbing his hand I looked deeply into his eyes, knowing that simple look said it all to him.

_I wanted more._

Without words he withdrew his hand, leaving me feeling exposed.

"Do you... umm... have any... ummm.." Gold muttered, looking around my bedroom aimlessly searching for something.

Then the penny dropped.

"I have some hand lotion in my bedside drawer..."

I watched as the dark haired boy leant over my body to reach the drawer, rubbing his sun kissed skin all over me.

I closed my eyes and bit my lip, hating how turned on I was right now.

Once he finally managed to retrieve the bottle he just looked at it in amusement for a couple a minutes.

"Strawberry scented?"

I opened my eyes to glare at him.

_What, I liked moisturising and smelling good, okay?_

"Just shut up and use it!" I spat, watching as Gold did as he was told.

He was careful not to use too much in case I shouted at him again but not too little. Closing my eyes I decided I had seen enough of Gold's idiocy and just wanted to enjoy the moment.

I wanted to enjoy knowing Gold would never be able to get over this, no matter how much he tried.

My ears detected the hand lotion bottle hit the floor so I assumed he was done. Opening my eyes I saw Gold gently and nervously move my legs so they were parted and those amber eyes of his were just looking at me, taking in every inch.

_Why was he looking at me like that?_

"Are you going to do it, or what?" I said, feeling impatient.

Gold nodded obediently and slowly steadied himself against my entrance.

Biting my lip I waited for the initial shock to my system.

_I don't regret my command, even if if feels a little uncomfortable. I know Gold is doing everything he can to be gentle, but he can't do everything can he? _

Once the whole of his length was inside me Gold waited for me to say or do something, a look of approval or a noise of some sort.

I closed my eyes, taking deep breaths.

"Move..."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure! Now move!" I commanded forcefully, gripping the bed sheets with my hands tightly.

Gold's body rocked in a smooth rhythm as he thrust into me over and over again, reminding me of when we did this earlier today.

_Only this time it felt different... it felt way more controlled and less sporadic._

"A-ah..." I groaned, wanting him to speed up.

_There was no way I was going to release at this speed!_

Gold's hands were either side of my head, holding onto the pillow I was laying on. His body moved against mine and all I could think about was this feeling that was coursing through my veins.

_God... he was so good at this..._

"Faster..." I demanded once again feeling his thrusts increase in pace almost immediately.

I couldn't open or close my eyes at this point. They were just left to roll to the back of my head while I tried to fill my lungs with oxygen.

_ Breathe! God damn it!_

"G-Gold!" I cried, hands tightening their grip on the bed sheets as the pleasure continued to sear through me like a bullet.

His breathing was heavy and laced with moans, it was driving me insane.

_God... his moans were so hot..._

"S-Silver... aahhhh..."

_ When he moaned my name like that I almost lost it, almost... _

With every thrust it was sending me closer to the edge and I couldn't quite believe Gold and I were fucking, yet again. I could feel myself losing control and Gold was just enjoying the hell out of it.

_Then again he was the one begging me for sex on my front door, wasn't he? Seems like we were playing 'chess' after all._

* * *

After a few more minutes of thrusting I found myself crying out as I released all over Gold's stomach and my own.

The thought of being covered in a sticky mess didn't seem to register right now, all that registered was the fact Gold and I had just had sex, again, and he had caused me to have one of the best orgasms in my entire life.

It didn't take long for Gold to release either, after a few more desperate thrusts he cried out as he violated me with his seed.

_I tried the whole breathing thing... didn't work out. _

Now I was left panting like I had run a marathon while Gold just shivered on top of me. He rested his head on my shoulder as he too tried to get his breathing back to normal, but I couldn't help feeling a little dirty.

_ Once again... Gold had managed to get me into bed... only this time I was prepared. And now I will never look at my hand lotion in the same way again. _

I kept my hands at a distance so I wasn't touching or hugging Gold.

It wasn't as if we were lovers or anything.

"Oh... my... God... that was... wow..." Gold murmured in between breaths.

I rolled my eyes and shuffled, feeling rather uncomfortable having Gold's weight pressing down on me.

"We need to do that again..."

"Get off me..." I mumbled, pushing him up into a sitting position as I started to get up.

I shivered as I felt warm liquid trickling down the back of my leg.

_Instant reminder..._

"What? Where are you going?" Gold asked, watching me with large amber eyes as I headed towards my bathroom. I needed to shower.

I also needed to get Gold out of here.

"I'm going for a shower, you should get dressed..."

As I walked towards my bathroom naked I heard Gold's voice call out to me.

"Can I come too?"

"No! You have done enough damage for one day. Just go home!"

I closed the door behind me to my bathroom and looked up at the ceiling.

_ I needed to control this... Gold needed to know his place. I wasn't his lover, or his boyfriend... we just had sex that was all, no feelings or emotions were involved._

Placing a hand to my head I waited for what seemed like forever for Gold to say something else, anything to indicate he was leaving.

"Okay... I'm going to leave now... Silver?"

_ It's like he thinks I can't hear him or something_.

"Silver?"

"Alright! Just get out of here! What part of that didn't you understand?!"

I heard my front door open and close and I knew he had actually gone, just like that.

Rubbing my forehead I wondered if my plan had actually worked, did Gold know his place now?

Did he know that I was the one in control of this '_arrangement'_?

_Still... I couldn't help but feel like this was just beginning of things. Did I really know what I was letting myself in for?_

* * *

_**Authors Note: Oh dear... poor Gold, whatever will he do next? He should have tried to resist... ah to hell with it! :P Please read and review! XD Thank you!**  
_


	8. The End of Innocence

**Authors Note: OMG! I want to thank everyone for all the reviews! I know we have some SilverXCyan shippers now! Well, whoever wants to think of a name for that is more than welcome! This chapter might be emotional so if you need it grab a tissue! Enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter Eight: The End of Innocence**

I couldn't sleep even if I had wanted to.

My dreams continued to be haunted by images, and not just images of what Gold and I had done. It was far more serious than that.

Every night without fail I would wake up in a cold sweat as images of the past continued to resurface._ Even after eleven years I couldn't get over it. I hoped some day I would. _

I sat up in my bed, rubbing my eyes, wondering what time it was. It was probably early in the morning, and all throughout the night I had been tossing and turning in my sleep.

Sighing to myself I combed my fingers through my hair, wondering if there would ever be a time I could sleep peacefully through the night. I doubted that.

_Memories don't just disappear._

Glancing over at my alarm clock it read the time 8am, once again way too early to be awake.

Grumbling to myself I snuggled into my bed and closed my eyes, attempting to go to sleep again. Of course it was stupid.

The noise from my telephone ringing in the living room made me decide that there was no point in trying to go back to sleep.

Groggily I shuffled out of my bed, stretching my limbs as I made my way into the living room, ready to give whoever was calling a piece of my mind.

When I finally got to the telephone I sighed, wondering if it was Gold ringing me. If it was then I definitely would not be happy.

Sitting down on my sofa I answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey Silver, it's me Crystal!"

I blinked, not quite sure why she was calling me so early in the morning.

"Is there something you want?" I asked coldly.

_ It was probably about her bicycle... oh shit! The bicycle! How was I going to explain that?!_

"Yes there was actually... you see... I need to talk to you, about something important..."

"Can't it wait? It's 8 o'clock in the morning!" I cried out, rubbing my forehead with my other hand in annoyance.

_Why did she need to talk to me? I was renowned to be a conversation killer._

"Please Silver... I just think you would be the best person to talk to about this..."

I sighed, knowing for a fact she heard me.

_Why couldn't she burden Gold with all her problems? Still, I guess it wouldn't hurt to just talk._

"Go on then..."

"Not over the phone! I need to see you... can you meet me in the café in half an hour?"

I rolled my eyes, not quite believing this.

_I had bad enough memories at that God forsaken place! Unless this was a trap to lure me and Gold together?_

I wanted to refuse, to just hang up on her, but her voice sounded pretty desperate.

_Maybe it was something bad?_

"Why the café?"

"Because it's isolated and the best place to talk. Please Silver... I wouldn't ask if it wasn't serious..."

Deep inside I wondered since when did I become a wet lettuce around women?

_Then again I did owe her I suppose... after the whole bicycle thing._

"Okay then... see you there..."

I hung up immediately, hating myself for agreeing to this!

_I swear to God if Gold was there... I would hit the fucking roof!_

But still, it didn't seem like she just wanted a cosy chat, something seemed different about the way she sounded.

_She sounded... upset._

Now Crystal never usually got upset over anything, even if I insulted her constantly. Nothing ever seemed to bother her.

_Okay, now I needed to find out._

* * *

Once I had motivated myself to get dressed into my black attire, and leave my apartment I was running fifteen minutes late.

_Oh well, if it was serious she could wait couldn't she? After all, why should I be rushing around for her?_

I grumbled to myself all the way to the café, hating how as soon as I set eyes on the place all those memories resurfaced.

_The memories of Gold kissing me in the bathroom..._

I shook my head, trying to ignore them for once. I wasn't here because of that, I was here because Crystal desperately needed to talk to me about something.

_Oh shit.. what if she knew about our 'arrangement'? What if she knew Gold and I were fucking behind her back? Would she be okay with that? Well, I couldn't see why not... it wasn't as if she was Gold's girlfriend or anything._

Taking a deep breath I pushed the large doors open and stepped inside.

The exact same smell as before wafted around the room causing my stomach to growl. I looked around trying to find Crystal.

There weren't many people here, just like the last time, and it was extremely quiet. I was almost frightened to breathe in case I got kicked out.

Then I spotted a flash of blue hair by one of the tables and decided to approach her.

As I walked closer to her I noticed she was on her telephone.

Pausing I watched as her body language signalled something was very wrong. Her arms were raised and her voice got louder.

_Was she shouting?_

I got closer, wanting to listen to the conversation without being noticed.

"What do you mean, it's over between you two?! You can't do this to us! Mom needs you! You know that! She loves you so much, does that mean anything to you?!"

Slowly and cautiously I sat on a chair beside her, leaning my arms on the table. I continued to listen.

"No! Don't tell me to calm down! You don't care about us! If you did then you wouldn't be leaving us!"

I frowned, having an idea to what she wanted to talk to me about.

Looked to me like her parents were splitting up and of course I would know all about that.

_Still... why would she want to bring up all those painful memories?_

I glanced over at the azure eyed girl momentarily before she noticed me.

"Look... I'll call you back. Don't think this is over!"

She hung up and sighed as she sat on the chair beside me and placed her head dramatically on the table.

Trailing circles on the surface with my finger aimlessly I decided to speak up.

"Problems?"

"Yeah something like that...and you finally decided to show up huh?"

I glanced at the clock on the wall.

_So I was twenty minutes late, so what?_

"Be grateful... usually I don't do this sort of thing..." I grumbled.

"Oh right, and am I supposed to ask what's wrong with your face?"

I refused to look at her, knowing she was in one of those argumentative moods right now.

"Nothing is wrong...why would anything be... wrong?"

I could feel my patience slipping for some unknown reason.

"Oh... no reason... just your usual sunny demeanour seems to be dampened" She shot back sarcastically.

I rolled my eyes at the blue haired girl.

_Ha, sunny demeanour indeed..._

Calmly I responded.

"You have obviously got a lot going on in _'Crystal world',_ so I wouldn't want to add to your problems..."

_Okay maybe that was a little harsh. But still, get over it! So what... her parents were splitting up, at least they still loved her._

She leant over to me, her voice dropping an octave,

"Is that you trying to be funny or something?"

I scoffed at her remark.

"No... that was me being sarcastic if you didn't know..."

I looked at her, watching as the look of disgust smothered her petite features.

_She should have known me better by now, being woken up by her stupid telephone call asking me to sort out her family shit, I didn't need this_!

"Haven't you got anyone else to bother right now?"

I watched as her eyes widened significantly.

"Is that what you think this is all about? To just bother you?!"

_God... this was going to be annoying._

I looked away, not wanting to hearing her scream and shout. Instead her voice sounded pained.

"Do you think that you are the only one that can have a bad day? That you are the only one who can lash out at the world and all is forgiven? Well, let me tell you something Silver... lately every single day is a struggle in '_Crystal world'_... just trying to keep everything from falling apart..."

I looked downwards at the scratches on the table, hating how everything just seemed to be about her right now. I know I was here for her, but still.

_Things weren't that bad! Now I knew what bad really was. Try growing up in a broken family._

"So what... you paint on a fake smile and pretend everything is rosy?" I enquired.

"Yes... I paint on a smile.. and try to forget about the fact my family is slowly falling apart. That my dad... wants to leave my mother for some... stupid cow! And I can't do anything about it..."

_See, what did I tell you? So what, her dad wanted to leave... at least __he still loved her, at least he wouldn't ever hurt her. What the hell did I have?_

I remained silent as I just watched her, I watched as her face started to crumble in front of me.

"...so you can stop stomping around like you own the place... just because you have had a row with Gold, or because your hair is too fizzy, or because your daddy didn't love you enough... but you have no idea what it feels like to hurt... and I mean really hurt!"

Tears started to form in the corners of her eyes as she attempted to wipe them away.

_Oh... I had no idea did I? Of course not, I mean I had the greatest childhood ever. Sense the sarcasm there? _

I looked away, diverting my eyes to the ceiling as I felt my heart become as heavy as stone.

Maybe she needed to know more about me, about what I went through?

_I wasn't prepared to let her insult me like this, of course I knew how she felt! I knew all too well what it felt like to hurt!_

I weakly nodded my head to what she said, preparing myself for what I was about to say. I had never said this to anyone, and now for an odd reason I felt compelled to.

"...when I was eight years old... my '_daddy'_ physically abused me for the first time..."

I turned to look at her watching at how her eyes widened and her mouth dropped.

_Did she really not expect me to say something?_

She must have known pieces of my past that I had accidentally dropped out into conversation in the past.

I kept my eyes glued to the table as I literally sprawled myself across it.

"... I used to hear him coming up the stairs after work... there were times when I actually felt safe...when I thought he would just go to bed or have another drink... but then over night... it all changed..."

Crystal stayed quiet, like she had no idea what to say.

Lowering my voice I continued.

"...there were times when... if he was in a foul mood or had a bad day I would... pretend to be asleep...it didn't make a difference. In fact the beatings were usually worse... then...I would just close my eyes and try to block it out... tell myself that it wasn't my fault... over and over again in my head..."

"Oh God..." Crystal murmured quietly as I covered my head with my hands, not wanting her to see me.

Right now I felt so exposed to her, I felt like she was burrowing into the very core of my soul.

But she was just listening, not judging me.

"You didn't... tell anyone about this?" She asked me, large azure eyes looking into my soul.

I shook my head weakly.

_How could I have said anything? All along I felt like it was my fault that the beatings happened, that he was angry at me._

"No... in my own head there was nothing to tell... "

I glanced at her for a second, watching as she refused to move from her seat. She was fixated on what I was saying.

"...when I was in Pokemon trainer school... I smacked this kid for mouthing off at me... I smacked him hard and got into serious trouble with the teacher. I remember... he asked me.. _'what's wrong Silver? Did something happen back at home? Do you want to talk about it?'._..."

I smirked as I was re-telling the story, hating how it was sounding.

Even back then people patronised me, made it out like everything was my fault.

"No... I didn't like that... I hated it even more when they said '_Silver... you are one nasty, screwed up kid... your daddy is going to sort you out when you get home'_...and I was the only one who knew what that meant..."

I looked at Crystal, seeing that she was crying.

_She was crying for me!_

Her eyes were slightly red and her nose was stuffy.

_Why was she crying for me? I didn't deserve her sympathy._

"...how often did he... beat you?" She asked quietly, trying to keep it together.

I sighed, not even remembering. Once it happened the first time I just lost count.

I looked down at the table once again

"...I stopped counting..."

There was a pause before Crystal asked again.

"...your Mother... did she?"

"No... she didn't know... and she still walked out on us... on me..."

I watched as Crystal outstretched a hand and placed it on my arm.

_She was actually here for me, when I was meant to be here for her! How had it come to this?_

"...when did it stop?"

I glanced up at the ceiling, once again feeling my heart get heavier and heavier inside my chest.

Shaking my head weakly I responded.

"It doesn't stop... not really... not in your head... not where it really matters... but maybe I deserved it..."

"What?!" Crystal exclaimed, wiping her face on the back of her hand. "... that's not true, you are not a bad person!"

"You don't believe that do you? I'm sick... I'm twisted... a freak, a monster..."

Crystal shook her head desperately.

_Again why was she defending me? I knew what I was, I knew my flaws. That was why I needed to control literally everything! He took that all away from me..._

"You are nothing like that!"

"Everything... I touch or anyone that gets close to me... I infect...like Gold...he will realise that soon enough."

Crystal's eyes pleaded to me for that moment, like she was thankful I actually told her all this. That I saw myself as a freak, as a twisted sick person who loved ruining everyone's lives.

"Tell him.. tell Gold what you have just told me..." She said quietly.

I shook my head, not wanting Gold to get any more control over me than he already had.

"No... I can't..."

I watched as she squeezed my arm gently, making me turn to face her once again.

Tears trickled down her face as she said the words.

"...he cares about you..."

I turned away once again.

Gold didn't even know the meaning of the word.

"Let Gold know about the real you... let him in... he needs to know the truth. He needs to know why you are so angry at him sometimes... he will understand..."

_Ha! Gold? Understand? Give me a break!_

I frowned to myself.

I never wanted to tell anyone any of this, let alone him.

"...after everything you two have been through... do you really think you can scare him away? He has put up with you through thick and thin, through the good and bad times... I think he deserves to know a little bit more about the real you..."

"That is not going to happen Crystal... I've just told you because you were having a go at me for not knowing how you felt. I just made sure you knew exactly how I felt, and that your problems are nothing compared to what I went through"

She seemed taken back by my words, but decided against arguing with me.

She bowed her head and nodded.

"Okay... if that's what you want to do..."

"Yes... it is. And I don't want you telling him any of this conversation." I warned her, trying my best glaring face I could muster.

_How could I glare at the girl who I had told my past to? _

She was here for me, the only person who actually sat there and listened to me.

"I won't, it's not my place to say anyway. What sort of friend would that make me if I went and spilled your secrets to everyone?"

I looked away, smirking slightly.

_There it was again, that word... friend... seemed to be making a regular appearance._

"Yeah... good..." I murmured, wanting to thank her but not having the courage to actually say the words.

She smiled at me, sniffling a little now her tears had dried on her cheeks. At least she wasn't crying any more.

"Well... this was productive..." She commented about our conversation, giggling to herself afterwards.

"It sure was..."

"And yet... somehow you have made me feel a whole lot better!"

I rolled my eyes, wondering why.

Then again anyone would feel better in comparison to my horrible memories. At least she had a good childhood and was old enough to understand why her mom and dad wanted to divorce. I never got that option. My chilld hood was full of bad memories and it was forced on me, unexpectedly.

_ Mom just left and never said a word, leaving me with him..._

"I am glad you spoke to me about it though..." She added in.

"...I didn't really have a choice... I wanted you to know my life has and always will be a thousand times worse than yours..."

I combed my fingers through my hair as her hand left my arm.

She shook her head once again, obviously she was going to disagree with me yet again.

"Silver... that is the past! Your dad will never hurt you again, you are not that same eight year old kid who used to get beaten up... you are an adult now. All you need to do is concentrate on the future."

"And what great future is that?" I shot back, turning to look at her through narrowed eyes.

She shrugged.

_ Okay... she was only trying to make me feel better. Why did I have to be so negative?_

"Whatever you want it to be. You make your future Silver, you make decisions or choices in life and whatever path that takes you down you have to follow it, whether it be good or bad."

She was right, and lately I had made some real bad choices.

_Did that mean... my future was doomed?_

* * *

After another half an hour of normal chit chat, and trying my best to apologise to Crystal about her bicycle I finally decided to leave the café and go back home.

She actually took it well, not that I was surprised.

She was so laid back most of the time, and somewhere deep inside I was secretly glad I made her feel better about the divorce. It just wasn't right if she was upset.

As I started my journey home, hands in my pockets I lifted my head up so my eyes watched some cotton white clouds float by.

Once again it was a beautiful crisp summer day, not too hot or cold. Just perfect.

When I focused my eyes back on the footpath I noticed a very familiar figure standing by the Pokemon Centre.

As I squinted my eyes I discovered it was Cyan.

_Was he stalking me?_

It didn't take long for him to notice me,_ then again with this hair colour did I expect any different?_

"Silver!" He called out to me, bounding over to where I stood.

I sighed, wondering what the hell he wanted now.

_Okay... maybe I should try being a little nicer._

"Are you like my personal stalker or something?" I commented calmly.

He smiled sheepishly.

"Damn, I didn't think you would find out about my little secret..."

I watched as the blue eyed boy chuckled and playfully hit my arm.

"Just kidding! No, I was just healing my brother's Pokemon at the Pokemon Centre for him. I have been helping him out with training..."

"Why can't he just do it himself?" I asked, not realising how cold that sounded until it was too late.

Cyan seemed a little shocked, but soon recovered from my outburst.

"He's... not feeling too good right now..."

"As in sick?"

"Something like that... guess that battle and what that trainer said is still affecting him..."

Feeling slightly guilty right now I turned to look away from the dark haired boy. There would be a time when I would confess about it, just not now.

It might never come down to that anyway.

"Oh right..." I mumbled.

"Hey! You busy right now?" Cyan asked me, his voice pleading to me.

I slowly turned to face him, raising an eyebrow.

"I might be..."

"Oh... well that's a shame..."

"Why? What did you want?"

Once again he smiled like an idiot, instantly reminding me of Gold for a split second.

I swallowed hard and tried to ignore it.

_ Cyan was not Gold, and never would be!_

He shifted uncomfortably on his heels.

"I was going to invite you around to my house... you know... that's if you want to..."

I folded my arms and just looked at him.

_Okay, this kid had only known me for like five minutes and already he was inviting me to his house? Wait! Did this have a hidden meaning?_

"You're not asking me out, are you?" I asked.

Cyan laughed loudly at what I just said and shook his head.

"Don't be silly! Besides... you're not my type anyway..."

I must admit that last part did make me smirk.

_But still, going round someone's house? I had only ever been to Gold's, and even there I felt uncomfortable. Maybe I should just go home..._

"I can't anyway... I have stuff to do..."

"Oh...I just thought it would give us a chance to get to know each other, and become better friends..."

_That word... yet again. Frendzoned much?_

But still, was it really so bad? I didn't want to run into his brother again though, that would definitely put the Meowth amongst the Pidgey's.

I sighed.

"Is your brother there?"

"No, he's staying at Mom's house for a few days until he feels better..."

Well, that was a relief.

_So what if I said yes? What could be the worst that could happen? _

I rolled my eyes, knowing that Cyan was literally begging me to say yes. I had no idea why, I wasn't good company at all.

"And if I say yes... will you promise not to harass me constantly? And stop stalking me! Seriously, every time I step out of my apartment you are just... there!"

Cyan chuckled at me like I was being stupid, but then again maybe I was.

He wasn't stalking me, after all he worked in Goldenrod City, it was only natural to bump into him every now and again.

"You have my word!"

I rolled my eyes, finally deciding to be a little nicer to him.

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to have some-one other than Gold and Crystal as a friend.

_Well... whatever that word meant._

I mean Cyan could be as annoying as hell, but he also seemed understanding. That was a good thing.

* * *

We finally decided to walk to Ecruteak, considering we both lacked any mode of transportation right. Not that it bothered me, in fact I rather enjoyed the walk.

_ It was a lovely day, no fear of being burnt by the sun, no fear of having windswept hair... just perfect._

"Well... at least you seem happier than you did yesterday, did something happen?" Cyan enquired as we walked.

I pushed my hands into my pockets, not looking at him the entire time.

"Yeah... I guess so..."

"I couldn't help but notice yesterday...when I left the Pokemon Centre after work some dark haired boy was arguing with you outside the department store... is everything okay?"

It took almost all my energy not to scream_ 'stalker!'_ at him, and smash him in the head. But I remained calm.

_ He didn't know Gold, or our arrangement so it was okay._

"Yes, it's all sorted..."

"Good... only it looked kind of serious. I was in two minds whether to do something about it... but I figured you would hate me for it if I did..."

I scoffed at his remark, loving how already Cyan seemed to know a lot about my personality, and what pissed me off.

"Too right. I can fight my own battles."

"I have no doubt about that... I just don't want other people giving you a hard time over things."

_A hard time? No one was doing that, did I give off that impression?_

"No-one is giving me a hard time."

"...it looked like it last night..."

I rolled my eyes.

_Okay it probably looked bad, what with me trying to push past him and all, but seriously it was fine! I can deal with Gold._

"Don't worry about it, everything is fine..."

"Is he like a friend or something?" Cyan pursued, and I knew why.

He was trying to filter me for information, anything that he could use so we could be better friends. But knowing about Gold wasn't really the way to do it.

I sighed.

"Yes... a very stupid, immature and annoying friend... who doesn't know when to quit"

"I see..."

I turned to look at Cyan. His face seemed troubled, like he wanted to say something else but didn't know whether it was his place or not.

"Are you two... close?"

I raised an eyebrow at the blue eyed boy.

_Close? What did he mean? Close as in best friends? _

I shook my head.

The only way we were ever close was when we slept together. That was probably the closest we have ever been.

"Not really..."

"But, you have known him for a long time, right?"

"I don't see how my relationship with Gold is any of your business."I remarked coldly.

Cyan shrugged.

_Maybe he was just trying to make small talk or something? But still, why did he keep bringing up Gold?_

"You're right, it isn't any of my business. But, did you know that he is really into you?"

I had to stop myself from tripping over my own feet in shock.

_What?! Into me?! As in what? Oh God... please how the hell did Cyan know? He knew about us?!_

"D-don't be so stupid!" I cursed, trying to recover from my tripping incident.

Cyan chuckled.

"It's so obvious Silver... anyone can see it! Have you seen the way he looks at you? Even when you two were arguing you could easily tell he was hurting deep inside"

_God, first it was Crystal telling me how Gold cared about me, now this guy? He didn't know anything about me, or Gold, or our relationship!_

I bit my tongue and stopped myself from saying anything out of turn.

_So what, maybe Cyan was seeing things or signs that were not there? Or maybe I could lie? Yes! Lie about him, say he is Crystal's boyfriend! Great idea Silver!_

"Gold is dating Crystal... that blue haired girl who you assumed was my girlfriend"

I watched as Cyan's expression changed from neutral to shocked.

"Never! Well, that still doesn't change the fact he likes you. So what, he is dating a girl right now, it doesn't mean he is 100% straight does it?"

I frowned, hating how this kid always had something else to come back at me with. He kept finding flaws in what I was saying and I didn't like it.

"Shut up Cyan, Gold and I are friends and that is all we will ever be."

_Oh God... I just called him a friend..._

I watched as the dark haired boy smirked.

_It wasn't a satisfied smirk, it was slightly unsettling._

"Even your names go together! It's so ironic and corny! Like something out of a cheesy romantic comedy."

"That doesn't mean shit."

Again Cyan shrugged, trying to suppress a chuckle from his throat.

There was something in his eyes that was really starting to unsettle me. It was like I could literally see the gears of his mind working behind those blue eyes.

"Oh well, it really doesn't bother me whether you are with Gold or not, but you should stop lying to yourself."

"I'm not lying! And we are NOT together!" I cried defensively.

_ But we weren't! We wasn't in a relationship, we fucked occasionally, usually when we were at a loose end. That was it, no emotions or feelings were involved._

Cyan raised an eyebrow at me and smiled, and it was the first time I didn't see Gold behind that smile.

_I saw something that chilled the very core of my soul..._

* * *

Once we finally arrived at Cyan's house it took me about five minutes to recover from the initial shock of seeing how magnificent it was.

There was no way I would ever in my lifetime be able to afford a place like this. It looked like it belonged in a film or something.

It had large bay windows at the front and a lovely pebbled driveway.

_ It made my dingy apartment look even more worthless._

"This is your house?" I enquired.

_Now it seemed like a privilege to be invited here!_

Cyan smiled.

"No, this is my Grandparent's house... but I live here"

I watched as the shorter boy just walked up to the large oak door and pushed it open.

All the hairs on my neck stood on edge.

_How could he just do that?! He should have knocked! Now... I couldn't just walk in! _

"Why didn't you knock?"

Cyan looked over his shoulder at me.

"Grandma doesn't like it when I knock, it annoys her..."

"But... is it okay for me to even come inside?" I asked, feeling very self conscious right about now.

I watched as he latched his fingers around my wrist.

"Come on! They will be glad to know I have made a friend..."

And somehow I managed to let myself be dragged inside.

I felt so incredibly uneasy walking across the wooden floor towards the living room.

Everything was so quiet, too quiet. At least Cyan was here, and even though I didn't really know him it sort of helped me right now. I didn't want to be judged, I hardly fitted in a place like this.

Cyan opened the door to the living room first and called out;

"Grandma... I'm home!"

As I peeked from behind the door I couldn't help but feel a little light headed.

_The room was unlike anything I had ever seen! I thought Gold had a pretty decent house, but this... was something else. _

Large French windows were situated at the back of the living room, allowing lots of natural sunlight into the room. The colour scheme was of soft creams and browns, and it smelled of freshly washed laundry. My eyes diverted to an armchair situated by the French windows where a lady was sitting, reading a magazine.

This must have been his Grandmother.

She turned around to look at me as I stood beside Cyan.

I took my hands out of my pockets immediately, trying not to get kicked out of here immediately.

"Ah, I see. How wonderful!" She remarked kindly, slowly getting out of her seat to approach me.

She had jet black hair with a wisp of grey streaked through the middle. She had the same blue eyes as Cyan and was extremely short.

_I guess old age does that to people._

"I am so pleased my Grandson managed to make a friend."

"Grandma!" He cried out, obviously feeling embarrassed.

_Wait, I was his only friend? Oh yeah... the whole bullying thing!_

"Are you staying for lunch dear?" The lady asked me, looking at me through kind narrowed eyes.

I shrugged and turned to Cyan.

"Am I?"

"If you want to, I'm sure Grandma wouldn't mind"

I heard her chuckle and shuffle towards the living room door.

"It's no trouble at all dear, is there anything in particular you would like?"

_Okay, I felt like I was staying in a five star hotel or something. Was I really being asked what I wanted to eat?_

I looked at the carpet nervously, not quite knowing how to handle this situation.

"Do you like pizza?" Cyan asked me.

I looked at him momentarily before nodding.

"Well that's settled then!" The old lady beamed happily as she stood by the living room door.

"Why don't you show your new friend your bedroom?"

Cyan smiled and nodded as his Grandmother left the room.

It was such a beautiful room, I felt like I was bringing down the feel of this house just by being in it.

"Come on! I'll show you my room!" Cyan literally sang as he grabbed my arm and dragged me away.

* * *

There were so many rooms in this place I was worried I would get lost.

Once I managed to climb the staircase there were five rooms just staring at me. It was like a game of chance to me, and if I picked the wrong door then I would be sent to my untimely doom.

_Okay, I was being stupid. _

I followed Cyan to the door on the far right and watched as he pushed it open.

When I stepped inside I couldn't believe it.

T_his was his bedroom? It looked like a hotel room! It was so spacious, and clean! He even had a king-sized bed to himself! Lucky bastard. _

I had to stay cramped in my single bed in my apartment.

The windows were large and we had a great view of Ecruteak City, and he even had a desk with a computer stuffed into one of the corners. I think Cyan noticed how I was gawking at the room.

"Have you never see a room like this before?"

I shook my head, watching as he sat on his bed.

"No... I have only ever been to Gold's house..."

_I couldn't help it! I felt like I shouldn't be here. So Cyan's family seemed nice, maybe it wouldn't be so bad to be this kid's friend?_

"You can sit down you know..." Cyan mumbled, moving slightly so I could sit beside him.

Warily I managed to sit down on the bed, feeling how incredibly soft it was.

_How was a bed this soft?! It was unreal!_

"Do you sleep in this bed all by yourself?"

Cyan looked at me like I had asked something ridiculous.

"Well obviously, considering you are the first friend I have ever bought to my Grandparent's house..."

"It must get lonely... sleeping by yourself I mean..."

I didn't want to make it seem like I cared about him, even though a part of me did feel sorry for him.

He found it difficult to mingle with people, he got bullied by others and still managed to keep smiling.

_How did people do that?_

"I suppose it does sometimes, but I don't think about it. I don't mind being by myself."

"I guess you're used to it, huh?"

Cyan smiled and looked downwards at the carpet.

"Yeah..."

"We aren't that different, you know?" I mused, watching as the blue eyed boy glanced at me momentarily.

_And we weren't. We both were used to being by ourselves, we both liked it that way, and we both got bullied. Only I got bullied by my own father..._

"Well, we are. I don't stay angry at the world and blame everyone else for my own problems. It is my own fault I ended up this way..."

Now this got me interested.

"What did you do?"

Cyan sighed and looked up at the ceiling in thought.

"It's what I didn't do... you remember when I told you yesterday about the bullying back at Pokemon Trainer School, and what they said about me?"

I nodded, cringing silently to myself.

_How anyone could be bullied over a couple of stupid rumours was beyond me._

"...well like I said I went and agreed with the rumours... I agreed about what they said about me and my best friend...but I never told him about it...so the bullying stopped for me, but it got worse for him..."

I listened intently to what he was saying, watching his expression change to sadness.

_I thought he had no friends?_

"...they used to tease him about it at first, call him names and make up stuff like I was planning to seduce him when we got home... it was all bullshit... but it really got to him. He got so angry at me... he said I ruined his life for going along with it and making it seem like we were really gay for each other. Of course... it didn't matter what I said...he had made his mind up. The bullying got worse day after day... I used to hear them shouting out horrible names to him... writing 'fag' on his locker in black permanent marker pen... and scribbling all over his workbooks... but I didn't do anything to stop it! Now I wasn't the target I just blended into the crowd and became a nobody... whilst he got all the abuse..."

Now it was starting to make sense.

So his best friend hated him for not doing something about it when the bullying started on him, instead Cyan ignored it because it wasn't affecting him.

"What happened?"

Cyan swallowed hard, trying to keep it all together.

"...things went from bad to worse. I noticed that he stayed away from me at all times, he wouldn't even look at me in the end. I suppose he blamed me for the bullying in the first place...but... when some-one's friend died at the school all the bullies started saying that it should have been him who died... because he was gay and that straight people don't deserve to die. It was horrible... the way they used to torment him, and keep telling him over and over that he should have died instead...of course what happened next... I should have seen it coming..."

"Bastards..." I mumbled under my breath, all of a sudden feeling very angry.

_How could anyone say that! Just because that kid was gay, there was no need to say he should die!_

"...he took a bunch of pills in the park and took his own life..."

My eyes widened as I watched Cyan's shoulders tremble and his head was bowed downwards.

_Was he crying?_

"...and that is why you have never had another friend?" I asked quietly, watching as he nodded weakly.

"I...couldn't save him..."

"It wasn't your fault that he committed suicide! It was his own choice!"

Cyan put on a smile and shook his head.

As he looked at me I could see he was crying. Tears had dribbled down his face and had left tracks on his cheeks.

"I could have stopped it... I could have done something...I didn't..."

"It's not your fault! Stop blaming yourself! It's the past now... people have to learn from their mistakes..."

Right now I felt like such a hypocrite.

_ I was still hung up on my own sordid past, but then again... maybe that was just me. Even so, I didn't actually like seeing him cry. It was like watching Gold crying..._

"So... I am nothing like you..." He finalised, wiping his face with the back of his face, trying to keep it all together.

I frowned.

We had all done bad things, or stuff we regretted.

_ Especially me, I was renowned for messing up._

"Is that why you are so protective over your brother? Because of all the things that happened to you?"

"Yes... I don't want him to go through what I did. I don't want him to get bullied, to feel like killing yourself is the only option, to feel that no-one loves you enough..."

"But he has a good family supporting him! That must account for something, right?"

_ Apparently not. _

I wouldn't know about that, I hardly had the best upbringing. But I never once thought about killing myself.

Cyan shook his head lamely.

"That makes it worse... you don't want to be a failure... to let everyone down by telling them you messed up..."

"They are your family, they are meant to love you"

I watched as he shrugged indecisively.

"My Grandparents are the only ones who have ever stuck by me through everything. My dad walked out on my mom when I was very young, and mom goes through fazes of manic depression...yes I guess they do love us in their own little way, but sometimes it's not enough..."

Maybe he was right.

_Everyone didn't have a perfect life, or a perfect family. I constantly lashed out at the world, and for what? About a whole façade that linked to perfection. Seemed to me that everyone around me was suffering, and I wasn't doing anything about it._

"Why would he think about suicide? He's a kid!"

Cyan rolled his eyes and chuckled, trying to stop another rogue tear from falling down his face.

"You would be surprised what goes through people's minds when they are desperate..."

I felt my heart sink as realisation started to sink in.

_ He said his brother was sick... he never meant as in vomiting or an illness...no, he meant psychologically sick...and it was me who had put the tin lid on it. _

I swallowed hard and looked away, finding it hard to be near the dark haired boy.

_How could I ever own up to that? That it was all my fault his brother was suffering?_

I clasped my hands together between my legs and bit my lip hesitantly.

"I wouldn't worry too much about it..." Cyan comforted, trying to fake a smile.

I knew that he was still broken inside, and it seemed the more time I spent with this guy the more I was inclined to think if I wasn't such a fucked up mess we could have been really close friends.

"Still... I am glad that I met you though" He added in cheerfully.

My eyes widened.

"Why the hell are you glad about that?"

"Because your not that bad. I know you pretend that you're Mister I-Have-No-Heart-So-Leave-Me-The-Hell-Alone... but deep inside your actually nice..."

I rolled my eyes and placed my hand to my head.

_Why did people keep calling me nice?! I was not nice! Far from it!_

"I don't pretend..."

"So why did you actually accept my invitation? If you really were heartless you wouldn't have cared if I got upset... you would have declined anyway."

Okay, he got me.

_But still, I was killing time that was all! And it kept my mind off Gold, so it was all good._

Even so, Cyan still reminded me of him but the more I got to know him the less Gold reappeared in my mind.

"Shut up..."

"See? You're pretending again!"

I watched as he smiled wildly and playfully nudged my arm. I couldn't help but smirk.

_This kid... he was as weird as hell but he wasn't so bad._

Feeling so mentally and physically exhausted I flopped backwards onto the bed, enjoying how soft it felt.

I closed my eyes momentarily before feeling the bed move once again.

Opening one eye I saw that Cyan had done the same. He was lying on his back, looking up at the ceiling.

"Thanks..." He mumbled.

"For what?"

He turned to me and smiled.

"For being here, for letting me talk to you..."

I snorted at his remark.

_Well, I could have probably gone to sleep and woken up, and he would have still been talking._

"I didn't really have a choice... you never shut up"

Cyan leaned over so he was on his side and looked at me like he was shocked, and then once again playfully hit my arm.

"That's mean!"

"It's the truth!"

"Oh... well I am sorry I talk so much!"

"Yeah... you need to learn when to shut up..."

Cyan's eyes narrowed as he neared me, leaning on his hand.

I just watched him and saw some sparkle in his eyes that had been lost all throughout our conversation.

"...why don't you shut me up then?" He replied dangerously.

I raised an eyebrow at him and rolled onto my side to face him properly.

_Did he mean...?_

"What, by punching you in the face?"

Cyan slowly shook his head.

"Isn't there another way you could shut me up?"

_Right now... I was feeling a little unsettled._

_Did he have Scitzophrenia or something? One minute he was fine, he was crying and everything... okay that's not FINE, but you get what I'm saying?! _

I took a deep breath, and shook my head.

_I didn't want to believe that this guy was hitting on me. No..._

"...looks like I'll have to show you then..."

"What?! No... I really-"

_Somehow, I'm not quite sure how this happened but why was Cyan kissing me?!_

My eyes widened as I felt his lips brush against mine, slowly, longingly.

_This was wrong! I wasn't kissing Gold... this definitely wasn't Gold!_

Coming to my senses I forcefully pushed Cyan off me, and sat up quickly.

I wiped my mouth on the back of my hand, feeling my heart rattle angrily in my chest.

_What the fuck?!_

I heard Cyan shift into a sitting position beside me and I could feel his eyes boring holes in my skull.

"What the fuck is wrong with you?!" I cried at the blue eyed boy.

He shrugged and smirked.

"Come on, you didn't know? After everything I have told you... about the school rumours... did you think they were merely rumours? Did you think there was no truth behind them?"

I watched as he raised an eyebrow at me, obviously pleased with what he had done.

_That was it! _

I swung my fist and smacked him square in the face, watching as he fell back on the bed with a groan.

"I'm not GAY!" I shouted out.

My fists were trembling, my whole body was trembling.

_Oh my God... why did people keep hitting on me?! _

I watched as Cyan groaned and held his nose. My knuckles started to hurt after where I punched him, and suddenly I was receiving deja vu.

_When I punched Gold..._

"You have some mean punch... you know that?" Cyan grumbled, trying to stop the blood from seeping out of his nose.

"I swear to God... if you do that again... I'll KILL YOU!"

I stood up, feeling very trapped right now.

_ I needed to get out of here!_

Cyan smirked.

"Awww... it's really sweet that you only have eyes for Gold... how touching..."

"We are NOT together!" I cried out.

Cyan rolled his eyes and groaned, looking at his hand to see it was covered in blood.

"Then why get touchy about it? It was just a kiss... no big deal..."

I bit my lip, trying so hard not the scream and shout when actually I should have!

_ I was just trying to be nice... I'm never doing that again!_

"I am not interested in you... or anyone else for that matter!"

Cyan wiped his nose once again, and started to pinch the bridge to stop it from bleeding.

"Come off it Silver... you aren't fooling anyone. You have got gay written all over your forehead..."

"If you have any fucking sense in that brain of yours I would shut the fuck up right now!" I warned.

I could easily punch him somewhere else next time. That was if he even dared to do anything.

"I know I look like him... I look like Gold... why don't you just pretend I'm him. It could be fun"

"You are nothing like him!"

"And how would you know that?"

His voice was playful, like he was toying with me.

Once the bleeding had stopped he continued to look at me through narrowed eyes.

"Gold is a thousand times better than you would ever be!"

I watched as he laughed.

"Now how can you say that when you haven't tried it?"

I could feel my bones start to ache and my muscles tighten.

_Why was he doing this? Why did I feel trapped? I had to do something! I needed to stay in control!_

"Cyan... if you don't want a black eye to add to your injuries I would keep my mouth shut if I were you." I said calmly, and yet I think it had more of an effect.

He just shrugged and sighed.

"It's such a shame... I thought you were a virgin..."

"I'm warning you Cyan..."

"Tainting unclaimed territory is so much more... satisfying..."

_ That was it, I lost it. _

I swung at him again, and continued to hit him repeatedly in the face with my fists.

I saw red, I couldn't help it.

_How dare he talk about me like that! _

I watched as he squirmed on the bed, crying out as I couldn't stop hitting him!

_I thought his face would literally be unrecognisable! _

But I did stop. I had to. I had to stop myself otherwise I could get into serious shit here.

I watched as Cyan groaned on the bed, suffering from my assault, and feeling like rabbit in headlights I fled.

I ran down the stairs as fast as I could, ignoring everything, just trying my best to block it all out.

Once I was out into the open air I ran, and I didn't stop running.

I ran until I thought my feet were bleeding.

_I needed to get away from there, away from Cyan... What was up with him? One minute he was fine, the next he went all psychopath on my ass! _

_Maybe I needed to watch my back when he was around..._

* * *

**Author's Note: OMFG SHOCK! :) Now... what will happen next? Will Silver tell Gold, or will Cyan tell him first? Who knows? Please read and review! :D**


	9. Alibis

**Author's Note: Hello all! Wow, I can't believe how much positive feedback this story has been getting! Thank you all! Anyway, last time we left Silver running away from Cyan. What happens next? Will Cyan call the police on him, and what's this about needing an alibi? Find out!**

* * *

**Chapter Nine: Alibis**

My heart felt like it would literally burst out of my chest.

_ I don' t think I have ever run that fast from Ecruteak back to Goldenrod before... but I had to. _

I needed to keep away from him, from Cyan.

_Well... that was easier said than done. I had to work with him! He could definitely call the police, and then I would end up going to jail for GBH... not something I had in mind right now. _

It felt good to finally be in my apartment again, to feel safe.

It took me a while to get my breath back from all that running, and yet still those horrible images continued to resurface.

_ Why did he do that to me? I was beginning to think he was actually a nice guy, and then... he just changes completely._

_ I hated how he kept talking about Gold... like he was better than him in every way. Now Gold isn't perfect, he's far from it... but he is probably the only person who can actually get under my skin without me wanting to kill them._

That must count for something.

I sat down on my sofa with my head in my hands, wondering about what I should do next.

Later on I did have to work my shift at the store, but maybe I could call in sick?

_ At least it would give me time to sort everything out in my head, and besides... I could afford to lose a day's pay anyway._

Seeing Cyan so soon after what had just happened wouldn't do either of us any favours, and Red would definitely be asking questions about his busted up face.

_Yeah... I'll call in sick... _

I took a deep breath, trying to conjure up some sort of excuse.

I needed to sound sick at least, or cough a lot to make it seem plausible. But, Red wasn't very responsive so if I just said I was sick he would probably just believe me straight away.

_Okay, it was now or never._

Chewing the inside of my lip I picked up my telephone and dialled the department store's number. I only had to wait a few seconds before someone picked up.

"Good afternoon Goldenrod Department, Red speaking, how may I help?"

I cringed.

_ Man he sounded like he really didn't want to be there..._

"Hey Red... it's me..." I croaked out, coughing dramatically afterwards.

_ Maybe that was too much?_

There was a pause for a moment.

"Hello me..." He replied in a monotonous tone of voice.

I rolled my eyes.

_Okay, he was doing this on purpose._

"It's Silver you idiot!" I shouted into the receiver, and then I instantly remembered I was meant to be_ 'sick'_ so coughed loudly afterwards.

"I knew it was you..."

"Anyway... I was calling to tell you... I can't come to work today..."

I coughed once again, hearing Red sigh on the phone.

"You sound awful... well... more awful than usual..." Red replied sarcastically, and I literally wanted to go over there and give him a piece of my mind.

"You really know how to make someone feel good about themselves, you know?"

"So I am guessing you are sick then?"

I nodded, then realised Red could not see my actions through a phone.

Coughing again I responded.

"Yes...I've been like it all day..."

Deep inside I was smiling.

_ This was too easy, Red was so gullible._

"Then get off the phone and rest you moron" Red whined, and I immediately took offence to being called a moron.

"I had to call you to let you know! I can't just stay in bed and not tell anyone!"

I could imagine Red shrugging right now. He didn't care about anything, so he definitely didn't care about if I had called in sick or not.

"We can manage, you're not that important..."

I clenched my hand into a fist, longing to throw the receiver against the wall in rage.

_How dare he say that! He was only covering shifts! It was him who wasn't the important one! Still... I was sick remember?_

"Good... I'll see you tomorrow then..."

"I won't hold my breath."

Then he hung up on me.

_Wait, I normally hang up! HOW DARE HE DO THAT?! I always hang up on people!_

I just looked at my receiver in shock.

I swear Red had it coming next time I saw him.

Once I placed the receiver down I relaxed on the sofa, wondering about what I should do for the rest of the day.

I couldn't go out in case anyone at work saw me, or in case Cyan was stalking me again.

Shuddering to myself I closed my eyes.

_The way he kissed me was so horrible...nothing like Gold. Gold's was tender, gentle... like he genuinely cared, Cyan's was... forced, like he was trying to control me._

I frowned to myself, hating how I didn't know it was coming.

I should have seen that look in his eyes, I should have known from those smiles he was giving me what his intentions were.

Opening my eyes I looked up at ceiling, suddenly feeling like I needed something, or more importantly someone.

_Since when did I ever get emotionally dependent on anyone? Well... since I allowed him into my life in a way I couldn't control any more._

_Truth be told... I needed him... I needed Gold here, I wanted to tell him what happened, I needed him to give me an alibi in case Cyan shopped me to the cops about me hitting him. Prison didn't sound like my cup of tea, to be honest._

Chewing my lip in annoyance I reached for my phone again, and then withdrew my hand immediately.

_ What the hell was I doing? I didn't need Gold here! I could fight my own battles!_

I sighed, and ran my hands through my hair, trying to fight this ongoing battle in my head.

A part of me wanted to call him, to hear his voice again... yet another part wanted to just ignore everything and hide away in here for the rest of my life. Of course that was impossible.

Once again I outstretched my hand towards the phone, and paused.

_What would I say? _

_Did I just want to talk? _

_Did I want to see him? _

_Oh God... why are things like this so damn complicated? _

I swallowed hard, keeping my hand hovered over the telephone receiver, trying to edge myself to actually dial his number.

_ But, what was holding me back?_

Gold and Cyan were similar looking, yes, but their personalities were very different.

Gold was the joker, the one who could literally get away with blue murder, and had a smile like butter wouldn't melt.

_Cyan... I had him so wrong._

_ I thought he was a genuine person, some-one who was like me, someone who got bullied and managed to cope with it. No, he was just trying to screw with my head, and for what?_

_ Did he know it was me who messed up his brother?_

I dug my fingers into my head while I finally managed to pick up the phone.

_Yes, I wanted to see Gold. _

I needed to get those images of Cyan out of my head.

Slowly I dialled his number, and placed the receiver to my ear, hearing it ring.

It only rang for a few seconds before someone picked up.

"Good afternoon, this is Penis Enlargement's For You... how may I help?"

My eyes widened as I heard those words.

_What the fuck? Oh typical fucking Gold!_

I sighed, trying to hold back my annoyance in some way.

I should have expected this kind of response.

"Gold... DO YOU DO THAT EVERY FUCKING TIME SOME-ONE CALLS?!" I bellowed into the receiver, knowing he was probably holding it at arms length right now.

_As if I had been worrying over this phone call, only to be greeted by that..._

"SHIT! Silver?! I am so sorry! I thought you were a prank caller again..."

"Yes, because I obviously have nothing better to do than prank call people..." I shot back sarcastically.

There was a pause.

_ Why couldn't he think of something better to say than Penis Enlargment Services? Then again... I suppose the prank callers would not phone again if they heard that in their ears._

"I am sorry... and anyway, why are you calling me? I thought you made it quite clear you didn't want to talk to me, or see me after what happened..."

_So did I. _

_Seemed like I actually needed him more than I would like to admit._

"I need to see you..." I mumbled, hating how it sounded.

It sounded like I couldn't cope without him being here, which was bullshit.

_I only needed to make sure he would cover for me, and give me an alibi about the Cyan incident. _

Gold chuckled down the phone.

"I never thought I would see the day that you would phone me and ask to see me."

"Gold, I am being serious. I need to talk to you about... something..."

I wouldn't tell him over the phone, that could wait until he got here.

"...about what we did?"

"No, not about that. About.. something else..."

I was getting frustrated with myself.

_ How had I let myself lose control like that, and hit Cyan?_

He had probably already called the police and told them everything, and that was why I desperately needed Gold's co-operation.

There was another pause.

"... what have you done now?" He asked me, his voice sounding patronising.

"I don't want to discuss this over the phone! Can you.. come over?"

I seriously hoped he didn't have a busy schedule for today. Usually he never did anything, but it would just be my luck if today he was.

"I can...but you have to tell me what it is about."

_I couldn't believe this!_

I didn't want to tell him over the phone, but he was so stubborn.

_ Why was I even bothering?!_

"Just forget it! I don't need your help!"

There was a pause.

"Silver... calm down. I will come round as soon as I can. Just try not to burst a blood vessel..."

I exhaled deeply, not realising I was holding my breath yet again.

_ Did I really care that much? _

I placed my hand to my head, still not understanding my reasons behind wanting Gold here.

_ Yes I needed an alibi, but it wasn't that important, was it?_

"Okay...try not to be too long..."

I didn't want to hear any more so I hung up the phone, glad that he wasn't the one who hung up on me.

* * *

I took a deep breath, and relaxed on my sofa, my eyes scanning the ceiling.

_What would happen if I saw Gold, and for that moment I saw Cyan again? Or visa versa? I don't think my mind could cope with that trauma. _

I rubbed my forehead, feeling like I was a trapped animal in a cage.

There was no way I could escape this problem, Cyan was not going to let this drop as easily as I would have liked.

No, I was sure he would continue to bother me, to harass me at work.

_ Maybe I needed to work somewhere else? _

_I could get a transfer to another department store... but the travel costs would be a serious injury to my bank balance. Was Cyan really affecting me that much?_

I closed my eyes for a moment, wanting this agonising feeling to go away.

It was eating me up inside.

How I had foolishly believed everything Cyan had told me back at his house, how for that split second I was starting to sympathise with him.

_ I should have trusted my instincts, they were very rarely wrong. And even though today I could avoid him at work, I couldn't do that forever... there would be a time where I would have to see him again._

I sat up quickly and got to my feet, walking over to my living room window.

Moving the curtain aside I watched life pass me by.

There were lots of people bustling around to and fro, all of them seeming to be content with life right now.

I frowned.

They were out enjoying the great weather, and I was stuck hiding indoors.

I leaned against the wall, my eyes searching for any sign of Gold.

_He said he wouldn't be long, but he did live quite a distance... unless he flew here or got a lift somehow. No, I wasn't that important in his life, he would probably just walk here. _

As I sighed, and was about the walk away from the window I noticed a figure getting out of a car right outside my apartment.

It made me squint my eyes to see the figure clearer.

And then I swear I felt my heart flutter for that moment.

_It was Gold... he was actually here..._

I moved away from the window quickly, taking a deep breath.

_Okay, I needed to figure out everything I wanted to say to him. Everything about Cyan... about how he told me his life story, and then about the kiss. Would he hate me? It's not as if I kissed him back in anyway... _

I scratched the back of my head nervously, waiting for the knock at my door, waiting for any sign that Gold was here.

I didn't have to wait long.

I leapt up in shock when I heard his distinct knock on my front door, and for some odd reason found myself rushing to open it.

As I grabbed my keys out of my pocket and unlocked the door my world just seemed to turn upside down.

I had to hold onto the wall to keep my body upright.

My eyes widened as I felt my heart creep into my throat, starting to suffocate me.

_I couldn't breathe!_

"Hello... Silver..."

_I didn't see Gold any more... I saw Cyan, standing there, with that same look in his eyes._

I froze, trying to force my lungs to breathe.

_ It wasn't working..._

My legs felt like a dead weight as I diverted my eyes to the ground.

I couldn't look at him any more.

"Silver? Hey, are you okay?"

I closed my eyes, now fully hearing Gold's voice in my ears, and instantly I could breathe again.

My heart rattled angrily in my chest as relief washed over me.

_Thank goodness...it wasn't Cyan._

"What the hell has got into you?" Gold asked, sounding rather concerned.

I managed to look up at his face, feeling relieved that it was definitely Gold standing here.

I didn't say anything, I couldn't. My voice felt like it would just fail me even if I tried.

So instead I just weakly moved to the side, watching as the dark haired boy walked inside my apartment.

As I closed the door slowly I paused, taking a deep breath.

_Why did I see Cyan?_

"Silver...you are worrying me. What's wrong?"

I turned to face him, looking into his amber eyes that sparkled in sadness.

He was genuinely worried over me.

I weakly shook my head.

"Nothing... it's nothing..."

"It seems like something to me, has something happened?"

I turned my head to the side, trying to remember to breathe at all times.

It seemed the incident had affected me more than I thought.

I felt Gold's hands on my arms, gently rubbing up and down, trying to get me to say something else.

"I...I can't..."

"It's okay, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to..."

I couldn't do it any more.

Limply I rested my head against his shoulder, while my heart weighed me down again.

It seemed like I was sinking into a pit of despair once again.

Then I felt his arms actually wrap around me, embracing me.

_I had never been properly hugged before...I usually never let anyone hug me...but it was Gold, I could let him..._

"Something is definitely wrong... usually you wouldn't let me do this to you." Gold joked, chuckling a little as he embraced me.

I ended up doing the same, only instead of hugging him it was more like clinging on for dear life.

_Why was I falling apart? I never fall apart._

"Something... happened..." I murmured quietly as I could, feeling Gold's soothing heartbeat against me.

Slowly he started to rub my back.

"You can tell, me you know?"

"I... know..."

I closed my eyes, trying to figure out where I should start from.

_From the beginning?_

"...at work there was this... new guy...his name was Cyan..."

"Like the colour?"

"Yes... and he seemed really weird at first, and annoying as hell... but the weird thing was that he looks... just like you..."

Gold's body stiffened against me as I retold the story.

"...he doesn't act or sound like you though... and yeah it freaked me out at first...but after a while he didn't seem that bad. Then... this morning he goes and invites me to his house...and for some stupid reason I said yes...and he ended up telling me his life story... about how he got bullied and stuff, just like me...and when I actually thought he was an okay person...he..."

Gold moved slightly so he was looking at my face.

"Did he do something to you?" He asked sternly, a tone I had never heard in Gold's voice before.

I shook my head, and then realised that he actually did do something!

Gripping Gold's t-shirt I explained as best as I could.

"...he tried to kiss me..."

"What?"

I closed my eyes, wanting to block out the mental image that suddenly resurfaced.

"Yes... but I pushed him away. Then... he kept taunting me... talking about how he was better than you and that I should pretend he was you... so I ended up attacking him..."

Gold narrowed his eyes as I finally managed to look at him.

He seemed slightly confused, as well as annoyed.

"You attacked him, and you're feeling sorry about it? Can I ask why?! You attack me all the time and I usually haven't done anything, so God help that kid!"

"He might report me to the police for attacking him..."

Now Gold seemed to understand, and just pulled me closer into the hug, once again his hands gently stroked my back in smooth circles.

"...is that why you wanted to see me?"

I nodded weakly, feeling so very pathetic right now.

_Was this what it felt like to break?_

"Well...I won't let that happen. You wouldn't survive five minutes in prison."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence..." I shot back sarcastically, but deep within I was glad Gold was doing that.

_Even though I had treated him so bad lately, and basically used him just for sex he was still here, comforting me when I actually needed it. _

That meant something.

"Well... if it comes down to it I'll say you were with me the entire time, so then you won't get into trouble..."

I nodded again, closing my eyes as I inhaled deeply.

_Okay... maybe I was secretly liking these hugs too much. I hadn't had a proper hug since my Mom left._

"But... still, if you ask me he got what he deserved!"

"I know...but I don't think this is the end of it..."

Slowly I moved away from the embrace, not wanting to be a complete idiot right now.

Gold just looked at me, his face expressed genuine concern.

"What, do you think he will try it on again?"

I shrugged, not really sure.

_It could be worse next time, he could even try taking it out on Gold to get to me. _

That was something I didn't want.

"I have a feeling things are going to get worse..."

"Did you tell him... about us?"

I smirked.

_What the fuck was I supposed to tell?_

Slowly I walked away, and sat down on my sofa, clasping my hands together.

"And what would I have said? We aren't in a relationship, we aren't lovers... we just have sex occasionally? Yeah, that would have made everything worse!"

Gold sighed and I heard his muffled footsteps edge closer to me.

His figure sat on the arm of the sofa, obviously not risking getting another beating off the springs.

"I suppose that is true...well maybe you should have lied?"

"I did lie! I said you were with Crystal!" I blurted out without thinking.

Gold's eyes widened as he tried so desperately hard not to burst out laughing.

"You said... Crystal was my... girlfriend?"

"I had to! He kept saying that you were really into me, and that we should be together and stuff! I had to think of something to get him to shut up!"

There was a brief silence as my eyes diverted to the carpet again.

_Yes, okay it was stupid to say that, but I wasn't great of thinking up excuses on the spot._

I felt the sofa move again and Gold sat beside me, a little too close for comfort.

"How the hell does he know what we do?! Is he some crazy stalker or something? Or does he have a camera in your bedroom?"

I looked at Gold incredulously.

_ Cyan wasn't that bright, he would never be able to get away with doing that._

"I don't think either of us are that important for a camera show Gold..."

Gold placed a hand to his chin, raising his eyebrows.

_Okay, he was seriously thinking about that?!_

I sighed, and placed a hand to my head in disgust.

"Don't even think of saying anything!" I warned.

He just shrugged and smiled.

"What happened to the soft side of Silver I saw a few minutes ago?"

I frowned.

"That was a one off...I don't make a habit out of hugging people"

Gold's smile seemed to get wider, if that was possible.

"...but why? Didn't you like hugging me?"

_That wasn't the reason! I couldn't go around doing that all the time, people would start thinking I had lost my touch or something. _

_I was desperate for that moment, that was all._

"Gold..."

"I liked hugging you..." He murmured in a quiet voice.

"You like a lot of things Gold..."

He nodded in response.

"Well... I like doing a lot of things with you..."

I turned to face him, watching his expression.

He was deadly serious.

_Was Cyan right after all? Was Gold really into me? Did he like me more than just friend's with benefits?_

I watched as he raised a hand to gently touch my face.

I moved away in response. It was just out of habit.

"...I know you like doing things with me too..." He cooed softly, withdrawing his hand.

I looked away, knowing exactly what he meant.

_Okay... yes... I did enjoy it when we had sex... only because he was so good at it._

"Are you trying to suggest something here?" I enquired.

Gold shrugged, but continued to smile.

"Maybe I am...and it might help you take your mind off things for a while..."

_He did have a point, but still...why was I having second thoughts? _

_Usually it wouldn't have mattered, Gold would have just casually lead me to my room and then we would've fucked senseless all afternoon._

_No, this time I felt like I couldn't do it._

_ Gold had come here to listen to me, to be here for me. To just use him once again... I didn't want to do that._

"I can't..."

I felt Gold's hand rest on my shoulder, and I tensed up immediately.

"Why not?"

"It just feels... wrong..."

And it would.

_Now, when I hugged Gold that actually felt right. To have sex with him with it meaning nothing? I wasn't sure if I could do that any more._

"But... I thought you liked it?" Gold asked, not seeming to understand where I was coming from.

_ Were things really that simple for him? _

I brushed his hand off my shoulder and sighed.

"I did..."

"So what's changed? Is it because of that Cyan guy?"

I frowned.

_Was it? Was that what the problem was? Maybe I just needed to relax or something..._

"You seriously need to relax...it's not going to do you any favours by over thinking about it..."

"Don't you think I know that?" I retorted in annoyance.

_It wasn't my fault that the images in my head wouldn't go away. _

_It wasn't my fault that I was worried I would see Cyan fucking me instead of Gold._

_ It wasn't my fault..._

"Then let me help you..." Gold cooed into my ear, which made me look at him.

He was deadly serious about this.

_Maybe he saw this arrangement as literally just sex, no feelings involved, no strings attached. But, my conscience didn't like that._

So, I needed to prove to myself that I felt something.

I needed proof that if I kissed Gold, and it literally made my heart flutter then there were feelings there, feelings I couldn't just ignore any more.

"Gold..." I mumbled, not feeling like I could go ahead, and just kiss him.

I needed him to make the first move.

"What is it?"

I closed my eyes momentarily before looking back into his.

"...kiss me..."

He paused for a moment before realising I was being serious.

Slowly his face neared mine as I watched his eyes close.

I took a deep breath, hoping, praying that it wouldn't mean anything, that I wouldn't feel anything.

But as his lips slowly and delicately brushed against mine I couldn't help but feel slightly light headed.

_This hadn't happened before... usually it was fierce, lust driven and messy...no, this was... different._

I closed my eyes wrapping my arms around the dark haired boys neck, pulling him deeper into the kiss.

I never realised all the small details until now.

_I never realised how soft his lips were against mine, how good he tasted in my mouth, and how my heart was slowly losing the will to live._

_ It was only a sex arrangement, nothing more...so why was I feeling these... feelings?! _

I fell backwards on my sofa, pulling Gold with me so he was laying on top of me, fingers now becoming lost in my hair.

I opened my mouth slightly as his tongue effortlessly entered my mouth.

_I didn't want this to stop... I didn't want Gold to go and leave me all alone in this dingy apartment any more. I didn't want to keep hitting him, or lashing out at him. _

_Maybe... I needed to do this for myself, to finally be able to accept some-one. _

I heard Gold groan into the kiss as his body weight pushed me deeper into the sofa.

I didn't care though, in fact I was enjoying this.

My heart quickened it's rhythm in my chest, making me feel a little nauseous.

_ Well, I wasn't used to this!_

As we both broke the kiss for that moment I just stared into his eyes, hating myself for feeling so attracted to this idiot.

He smiled, and for that moment I wanted to smile too.

But I couldn't.

I was so unsure of how I felt right now, how Gold was affecting me so much.

_This wasn't me losing control any more, this was me being honest with myself. It was the hardest thing I would ever have to do._

"Wow..." Gold mumbled shyly, aimlessly playing with strands of my hair.

A part of me wondered if he was aware of what he was doing.

But I didn't care.

_ And now I wanted to. _

_I wanted to forget about all that had happened today, and Gold would be the only person capable of doing that. _

Tugging on this t-shirt desperately I literally pleaded;

"Take me to bed... Gold..."

His eyes widened.

"Are you serious? But... I thought you-"

"-you heard me. I want you to make me forget..."

* * *

I didn't need to ask him twice.

I watched as he grabbed my wrist, and pulled me off the sofa so he could so effortlessly take me to my bedroom.

Once again, he was in control of this, but this was what I wanted. I didn't want to be the bad guy this time.

Laying down on my bed I released a sigh, still feeling a little tense about the whole Cyan thing.

Gold didn't lie down beside me, he sat up and looked at me.

I watched as he smiled.

"Still worried about that Cyan guy, huh?"

I just weakly nodded, wanting to punch myself for agreeing.

But Gold didn't say anything.

Instead his fingers started to unfasten my jeans.

I felt my face heat up even more than what it was, and a violent flutter surged through my stomach.

"Gold!" I instantly cried out, _wondering how the hell my voice got that high pitched._

"What?" Gold asked innocently "I know you enjoyed this the last time..."

His eyes focused back on the task at hand, and nervously I bit my lip.

_ It really was just a sex arrangement wasn't it? No feelings, no emotions, no anything._

Soon enough I discovered that he had pulled my jeans and my black cotton boxers down, and they were limply hanging around my ankles.

I lay back on the soft pillow, looking up at the ceiling, trying to steady my breathing.

That was working fine, until I felt Gold's lips around my semi hard erection.

I closed my eyes immediately, feeling myself harden almost straight away.

_Why did Gold always do this to me? Did he have the devil in him today?_

I also had no idea what to do with my hands right now, a part of me wanted to hold him in some way, but right now they were just hanging limply at my sides.

_ Okay, I'll grab the bed sheets instead._

As his tongue continued to tease my sensitive organ I could feel myself wanting to moan, wanting to create any sort of noise to let Gold know that I was really enjoying this.

_He was so good... the feelings he gave me...it made me want to scream until my lungs burned...but it was only a release, it didn't mean anything..._

"G-Gold..." I groaned, feeling his hands start to gently massage the inside of my thighs.

_This was torture! _

_It felt twice as good this time than the last, maybe it was because Gold knew my body better, he knew what I liked, and how to make me scream._

_ It wouldn't take long... _

I tilted my head back further, now burying my fingers in Gold's black hair, trying so hard to keep it all together.

My hips accidentally bucked upwards causing me to thrust gently into his mouth.

_I couldn't help it! I was so close..._

"Shit, Gold," I breathed, biting my lip "...I'm... gonna..."

I was cut off almost immediately by the overpowering euphoria that flooded my system.

I couldn't help but moan out loud, tightening my grip on Gold's head as I released.

Once I finally managed to breathe again I let my hands fall limply to my side, and opened my eyes.

My once hard erection was still twitching but, was now starting to become limp.

Gold wiped his mouth on the back of his hand, and just looked at me.

My heart continued to pound in my chest as I tried to get my breath back.

As I looked into Gold's eyes, I swear I saw something, _a small glimmer of hope._

"Gold..." I murmured, struggling to even speak right now.

"Yes?"

A part of me didn't want to say this, but I had to.

"Did you...feel anything while doing that to me?"

I watched as he raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"Feel.. anything?" He repeated.

"Yes, like... feelings... or emotions..."

Gold went silent, like he was almost afraid to tell me what was on his mind.

His eyes diverted away from me.

"It's just a sex arrangement Silver...isn't this what we both wanted?"

And as I felt a part of me die inside I struggled to nod weakly.

"Yes...it is..."

* * *

And as the afternoon slowly faded into evening, and my bedroom starting to become cloaked in a soft blanket of darkness I watched the dark haired boy sleep soundly in my bed beside me, completely unaware.

_It was just sex...it didn't mean anything...so why did I keep thinking about it?_

It was amazing when I felt him inside me, it was as if we were complete, a whole, like it was meant to be.

And then, it was so easily ripped apart again.

_But this was what we both wanted, that was true. So why couldn't I sleep? _

_Why couldn't I rest in my bed with Gold? _

_We had just had the best sex ever and now...I felt like I just couldn't relax again. _

I kept replaying in my head, over and over again.

_ At how he held me while we kissed..._

_How he so gently entered me and made sure I was okay before he made any attempt to move..._

_How he would kiss my cheek or my nose when he was thrusting effortlessly inside me..._

_How I would moan so loud and hold him so close to me, praying that a part of him felt what I did at that moment,,,,._

_ How good it felt to release, knowing he was the one who had caused it..._

I frowned, looking at Gold sleeping soundly amongst my bed sheets.

What was I supposed to do now?

_Right now, I just wanted to do the most unexpected thing ever. I wanted to snuggle against him, to feel safe..._

_Maybe this wasn't just an arrangement for me...and the more this went on the more likely that was becoming._

_ It was true. _

_Deep inside I was almost sure that I was falling...so uncontrollably in love with him..._

* * *

_**Author's Note: Credit to my silly boyfriend for the Penis Enlargement prank :) It made me laugh, so I assumed you guys would too. Poor Silvy, looks like things are started to make sense for him. He's falling in love with Gold. What will he do? Will he confess? Thanks again to all of you!**  
_


	10. Devil's Eyes

**Author's Note: Oh dear...this will be a fun filled chapter for all you Cyan haters out there. I am going to call CyanXSilver...Stalkershipping :D It seems to fit the bill quite nicely. Of course it'n only Gold he has eyes for. Anyway enjoy the next chapter!**

* * *

**Chapter Ten: The Devil's Eyes**

**_"...a blank, pale, emotionless face...with blackened eyes...with Devil's eyes..."_  
**

_The room was dark...too dark for my liking, yet I knew some-one was here. It was like I could almost feel another heartbeat echo in the emptiness. _

_Was this a dream? _

_Then I felt soft gentle lips brushing against my own, longingly, teasingly. I closed my eyes, feeling something warm push itself against me, and hands became entwined in my hair._

_ Was I dreaming of Gold doing this? _

_I never dream of him... _

_An inviting tongue traced over the contours of my mouth before plunging inside, causing me to moan softly. I was losing the will to live right now, like whoever was doing this was literally draining my life._

_ I held onto whoever it was in the darkness, pulling them closer as I realised that both of us were naked. Our obvious erections brushed together as I whimpered slightly._

_ God... it felt so good to dream of Gold after we had just done it..._

_Breaking away from the kiss I felt those lips reattach themselves to my neck, suckling softly._

_ "G-Gold..." I moaned, curling my toes slightly as my erection throbbed angrily. _

_Even in my dream world I got so fucking aroused..._

_ "S-Silver..."_

_ His voice sent shivers down my spine as his hands wondered from my hair down my back, to rest on my butt. Slowly, and delicately massaging circles into the skin._

_ I tilted my head back so he could gain more access to my neck, but that wasn't the only thing he wanted it seemed. _

_I found myself being flipped onto my back, staring into a black abyss. _

_It seriously seemed like no-one was there, but I could feel him... hear him... taste him..._

_ "I want you..." Gold moaned into my ear, causing goosebumps to erupt all over my body._

_ God... I wanted him too, just like before. _

_I closed my eyes, trying to steady my breathing, trying at least to calm down just a little. But it was hopeless. _

_I felt one of his fingers slip inside me causing me to gasp involuntarily. _

_I wish he would have warned me!_

_ "A-ah... I... want you too..." I groaned out loud, feeling as his finger pushed deeper inside me, as if he was testing how far he could go. _

_I really wanted this...I wanted my dreams to be good for a change, and not full of misery. _

_Another finger entered me and I gripped his shoulder's tightly, biting my lip. _

_God...this was torture. I was so fucking turned on right now... I just wanted him... _

_ "Oh God...a-ahhh..." _

_His other hand started to gently stroke my erection in a teasing action. Running ever so softly over the tip and down again. _

_I swear I was going to make my lip bleed with how hard I was biting into it. _

_ "G-Gold...please..." I whimpered, hating,yet loving how it sounded at the same time. Usually I didn't like being so utterly submissive, but I did when it was with Gold. _

_His hands continued to pleasure me entirely, causing my eyes to roll backwards, and me to moan out loud._

_ Oh my God... I couldn't hold on for much longer..._

_ "I want you to moan my name Silver... I want you to scream it so loud the neighbourhood hears it..." He cooed into my ear, tracing his tongue over it seductively._

_ I shivered, feeling my release approaching rapidly. _

_I needed to stop him! _

_Luckily for me he paused, removing both of his hands so he could open my legs wider._

_ I didn't want to imagine him looking at me over like I was a piece of meat, I just wanted to feel this moment, to feel him inside me. _

_God...why did it always feel so good?_

_I cried out when I felt him enter me, once again feeling complete. _

_I closed my eyes, trying to breathe once again. But I couldn't. _

_With every thrust I being pushed closer and closer to the edge._

_ "Gold~!" I cried out, just like he wanted, hands gripping his shoulders for dear life._

_ I still couldn't see him, it was so terribly dark I couldn't even see my hand in front of my face. But I guess that added to the thrill._

_ As he thrust harder and deeper into me, causing my eyes to open only to roll backwards I heard him speak again._

_ "You're my bitch now!"_

_ What? What did he mean?_

_ And as I opened my eyes I noticed that light had started to seep into my dream scape. I could see Gold, looking at me through narrowed eyes, wearing a smile that just didn't suit him._

_ Even though my heart was increasing rapidly inside my chest the feelings were still so immense I couldn't help but moan loudly._

_ "Oh God... Gold..."_

_ "That's it Silver... moan for me. Let everyone know that you are my bitch now!" _

_And as my orgasm was vast approaching I noticed Gold's eyes change colour. _

_They switched from that lovely soft amber colour to a sickening ocean blue, and his hair got shorter, and his face twisted into a horrible heartbreaking smile._

_ My eyes widened as realisation hit me._

**_ IT WAS CYAN! _**

_ "No... no..." I mumbled, hating this dream now and wanting to wake up. _

_I wanted to get him off me, to escape this somehow. _

_Cyan smiled and continued to thrust harder into me. _

_I hated the fact that I was still enjoying it! I didn't want him doing this to me!_

_ "You can't escape me Silver..." He cooed, laughing afterwards. _

_I shivered as my eyes stared back into his._

_ Devil's eyes... that's what they were._

_ And as I felt my release taking over me I cried out loudly;_

_ "No...no... NOOOOOOOO!"_

* * *

I shot up out of my bed, panting loudly like I had just run a marathon. Beads of sweat covered my brow as I looked around my darkened room in a panic.

_Cyan was not here, he was not fucking me, and I was safe in my apartment. That was a relief. _

I wiped my forehead, trying to get my heart to calm down. It felt like I was going to have a heart attack.

Then I felt something shuffle beside me.

It was Gold, and he was just waking up from his sleep.

His eyes were half lidded, and he yawned loudly.

"Silver...?" He grumbled, rubbing his eyes with one of his hands.

_ I seriously couldn't tell you how grateful I was to discover Gold beside me than Cyan. Man... that was a really bad nightmare._

"Sorry... I had a nightmare..."

Gold sat up, looking at me through sleepy eyes.

"What about?"

I shuddered at the thought of re-telling it.

_No, I better not._

"...it doesn't matter..."

"Come back to bed..." Gold cooed softly, wrapping his arms around me sleepily as he pulled me down back into the bedsheets.

I watched as he rested his head against my shoulder and closed his eyes, ready to go back to slumber land.

My heartbeat quietened down the longer I watched Gold drift off to sleep.

He was so peaceful, so at ease.

_How was it he could have a peaceful night's sleep and I couldn't? Not even he could fight off the nightmares in my mind._

I sighed.

I just wanted to snuggle against him, to feel safe, to feel like no-one could get to me or hurt me.

But, I couldn't.

I wanted to tell him everything, I wanted to be honest with how I felt.

But, I couldn't.

I knew that the longer this arrangement lasted the worse this would be for me. We had no friendship any more to fall back on, if I called it quits on our sex arrangement then we were over.

I shifted into a sitting position again putting my head in my hands.

_I hated feeling like this. _

Gold shuffled once again, and leant on his elbows.

"What's wrong?"

I closed my eyes, taking shallow breaths.

_It just seemed like solutions were never simple for me, that no matter what I did some-one always got hurt. If I was horrible, or if I was nice...people got hurt._

I felt Gold move into a sitting position, and his hand placed on my shoulder.

He was here for me, he always was.

"I can't...sleep..."

"Well... we did sleep for most of the afternoon."

I heard him chuckle.

_Yes, it was probably only around 8pm, that's probably why I didn't want to sleep. Also, there was no way I could sleep after that nightmare. I swear that was worse than any of the others I have had._

"You seem tense..." Gold murmured quietly, causing me to face him.

My eyes took in every little detail of his face.

At his large amber eyes, at how his bottom lip was slightly bigger than the top, like he was almost pouting all the time, at how his hair was so messy when he just woke up, and how beautiful his tanned skin was.

I found myself frowning at my thoughts.

_This was wrong. I shouldn't be thinking about Gold like this. _

Snapping me out of my daze I felt him place his warm hands on my cheeks, causing me to blush a little.

"This isn't like you Silver... usually you would have kicked me out by now, or would have swore or cursed at me. What's happened to the Silver I know?"

And he was right.

This wasn't me.

This was because of my stupid feelings, somehow they were messing with my personality.

I didn't flinch or back away as his thumbs slowly caressed my cheeks lovingly, I didn't protest when his lips gently brushed against my nose, softly kissing it.

_Why would I? Deep inside... this meant something to me. Was it love, or was it my definition of it?_

"Gold..." I murmured, trying to steady my voice.

He looked directly into my eyes, his attention entirely focused on me.

"Yes?"

I needed to ask him how he was feeling right now. If he felt anything for me, or for our arrangement.

If not, then I needed to sort it out before it got too out of hand.

"Do you... feel anything for me?"

He had a wounded expression for a moment.

"What the hell made you ask that?"

I shrugged as Gold moved his hands away from my cheeks.

"Curious I guess..."

"Well... I am curious about a lot of things, you don't see me asking about them...no scratch that, I usually just do it."

He chuckled, and I hated it.

_I was trying to be serious here! _

I looked away, sighing to myself. This was ridiculous.

_Did I expect a straight answer from Gold? Pardon the pun there..._

"Just answer me..." I said sternly.

Gold raised an eyebrow, and then seemed to actually think about his answer before blurting it out.

"Well... I would have to say yes...it's a stupid question really..."

"How is it stupid?" I shot back, wanting to know.

Gold shrugged.

"Well, I must have some feelings for you otherwise this_ 'arrangement'_ would never have happened. I don't go around losing my virginity with anyone, you know...?"

It took all my strength not to fall off the bed in shock.

My eyes widened to the point where I felt they were starting to water.

_Gold...was a virgin before he had me? Did that mean...?_

"You are joking, right?"

I hoped he was, if not then that meant this was way too serious.

He casually shook his head.

"Nope. I was all sweetness and innocence until you corrupted me..."

Now I folded my arms.

_Didn't he corrupt me?!_

"You corrupted me you idiot! You started this whole thing!"

I was starting to feel like my old self was returning.

Gold smiled wildly.

"Oh yeah... you're right. Oops! Looks like I corrupted both of us then..."

A small smile crept upon my lips for that moment before it disappeared again.

I was glad that he did that though.

Now I knew I wasn't in a long line of previous fucks, and that I was his first, it did make me feel better.

"But... why did you...lose your virginity to me? I mean...I thought you... weren't a virgin and all..."

"Silver... look at me, and then ask that question again. Who the hell would want to fuck me? Apart from you..."

I rolled my eyes and punched him playfully in the arm.

He dramatised the whole scene by falling onto the bed, screaming and wailing like a baby. Once again I sighed.

_He couldn't be serious for long, could he? _

I watched as he smiled and got up, pretending that nothing had just happened.

"Not even girls?" I pursued.

"Definitely not girls! I'm not really their type am I? I don't have a washboard stomach with toned abs, or great muscles... and I am hardly the best looking guy in the world, am I?"

I hated how he was putting himself down.

_See, to me I liked all that. All the imperfections were somehow perfect to me. _

"...I like how you are..." I mumbled, not realising what I had said.

I quickly placed my hand to my mouth in shock as I watched Gold's eyes widen.

Seemed like he never expected it either.

"...are you seriously okay? Are you sick, or something?" Gold asked, placing a hand to my forehead.

I batted it away in defence, trying my best to scowl.

"Shut up! I...never meant to say that!"

"Yes you did!"

"I didn't!"

Gold wiggled his eyebrows at me, and nudged my arm gently with his elbow.

"Are you trying to butter me up with compliments so you can have round two with me?"

My mouth dropped open for that moment.

_I couldn't believe he just said that!_

My heart fluttered for a few minutes before returning to it's usual beating rhythm.

"It is, isn't it?!" He cried out, smiling wildly.

Shaking my head I wanted to protest, but why even bother?

A part of what he said was true.

"Since when did you become a little sex kitten?" He asked me.

_A sex kitten? Ha, I had been called a lot of things but never that._

I shrugged and slowly settled back into the bed, feeling Gold's body heat next to me.

"Since when did you become annoying... oh wait... since you were born."

I watched as Gold settled down beside me, resting his head on the pillow.

"Hey! That's cruel!"

"It's the truth you mean..." I mumbled, lying on my side to face him.

He smiled at me.

"See? This is the real Silver..."

He outstretched a hand and gently brushed away a few strands of hair that had fallen across my cheek.

Involuntarily I flinched again, wondering why.

_I was used to Gold touching me now, why was I still flinching around him?_

"And anyway... where did that conversation come from? Why are you asking me if I have feelings?"

I closed my eyes and shrugged.

There was no way I would ever open up and confess about this, after all, this was only a sex arrangement.

"Like I said...I was curious..."

Gold smirked at me and then snaked his arm around my waist, pulling my naked body closer to his.

"Do you have feelings Silver?" He cooed into my ear, causing me to shiver slightly.

_Damn it, what was I going to do now? I couldn't admit it, that would just give me away. _

_Maybe I needed to do something to distract him? _

_Something I had never done, or thought about doing before. _

Slowly and cautiously I allowed my hand to wonder towards his stomach. As I wondered lower I discovered that Gold was already semi-erect.

Maybe because we hadn't been awake for too long.

Closing my eyes I started to stoke him gently, wondering if I was doing it right.

_ After all, usually Gold touched me._

"S-Silver..." I heard him groan softly as his body grind against me.

I continued moving my hand in a smooth motion, focusing on applying enough pressure near the tip because that was when Gold groaned the loudest.

I figured he liked it there.

"God... Silver...you're...turning me on..." Gold moaned again, tilting his head back so his neck was exposed and his breaths were heavy.

His hands were holding my hips tightly, like he was frightened to let go in case he would just hit the roof or something.

_But still, this wasn't so bad. _

Hearing Gold's moans I was beginning to get aroused myself.

As I quickened the pace I felt his body stiffen slightly, like he was trying so hard to keep himself under control.

I smirked.

Now it was pay back for all those times he did this to me.

"A-ah..."

His fingers dug harder into my hips, his whole body shuddering against me, and it was at that moment I thought I had tortured him enough, and slowed right down to a stop.

I watched as Gold's head moved back to look at me, he was panting and had a look of sadness in his eyes.

"Why...did you... stop?" He whined.

I removed my hand and shrugged.

"Felt like it..."

Then I was completely overwhelmed when Gold clambered on top of me, making it hard for me to move.

His erection brushed against mine gently, and I whimpered quietly.

_God... I never realised how aroused I had got._

"Okay... now I feel like fucking you senseless..." Gold murmured.

My heart started to quicken the pace as I was told to lie on my stomach instead.

_ I didn't like this, I couldn't see Gold. _

_All I could see were the pillows in front of me. _

So I closed my eyes, feeling Gold shift his body weight back on top of me so he was sitting on my butt.

His erection pushed against me and I shivered.

_I had never done it this way before, was it just as good? _

There was a pause so I figured Gold was getting prepared, once again with the land lotion.

_Man, that smell would haunt me forever, and I could never use it on my hands again. _

Then I felt him push one of his fingers inside me.

I kept my eyes closed, feeling as it twisted and turned inside, trying to ensure I was prepared for this.

Lately I was always prepared, after all, it was only a sex arrangement.

_So it was okay to constantly fuck each other right? No harm done? _

I bit my lip as I felt him remove his finger, and slowly pushed his erection against my entrance.

He wasn't inside yet, but I knew what it felt like.

That's what was so arousing to me.

And as he finally pushed himself all the way inside me I tried to remember to breathe.

_God...I just had a nightmare of Gold and I fucking and him changing to Cyan, and now we actually were! Just don't think about it!_

My hands gripped the pillows tightly as slowly I was being thrust into the mattress, causing my bed to make this horrible creaking noise.

_Since when did it do that?_

"God... S-Silver..." Gold moaned out loud, his hands holding my hips steady as he continued thrusting into me.

I was literally gasping for air every time he plunged deeper into me.

I was trying so hard not to make any noise, to not let it take hold of me.

_But I couldn't._

"G-Gold..."

The thrusts got harder and faster, causing my erection to rub against the mattress.

He was killing two birds with one stone here.

I gripped the pillows harder as I heard the dark haired boy moan louder.

_It was so fucking hot! I swear Gold's moans were like ecstasy to me._

The room would start to spin and my mind would just became fogged over with lust.

"You're... so good..." Gold groaned, tightening his grip on my hips as he plunged deeper inside me.

My eyes were unable to open or close, instead they were just rolling around like I was dizzy.

My mouth hung open limply as breathless moans continued to escape my lips.

I couldn't help it.

It felt so good doing it this way.

He was reaching deeper inside me and it felt indescribable.

"A-ah!" I cried out suddenly, my eyes shooting open as Gold suddenly managed to hit something deep inside me that just turned my world upside down.

As my body continued to grind against the mattress, and my erection was getting more eager for release I felt him speed up again.

_How did he do this?! Did he have countless supplies of stamina?_

"G-Gold...harder..."

I wanted him to hit that spot again and again.

And it didn't take long.

I gripped the pillows so tightly I was twisting them out of shape as uncontrollable noises continued to escape my lips, over and over again.

I wasn't even sure what I was saying.

_Was I pleading to him? Was I praising him? No idea... All I knew was I was getting close...so close..._

"Oh God...I'm...I'm gonna..." Gold cried out desperately, as he thrust harder and faster.

Seemed like he was going to release too.

"G-Gold...oh God... GOLD~!"

And after a few more precious thrusts I felt my body shudder violently as I released all over the bed sheets and mattress below me.

My breathing pattern was a mess as I literally gasped for air, feeling Gold's body twitch as he orgasmed just after I did.

I closed my eyes as I tried to ignore the horrible sticky mess that was underneath me.

_Oh my God... that was the best orgasm I have ever had in my entire life..._

"Shit..." Gold groaned as his erection shivered inside me.

And at that precise moment I just felt like I wanted to cry.

I just knew that moments like this were never meant to last, that I could never tell Gold how I felt.

I could never be honest with him, or with myself, because if I actually admitted it out loud then I would have to accept it.

There was no way I could do that.

* * *

An hour or so passed, and as usual I showered, trying so desperately hard to peel off the horrible sticky goo that was covering my stomach.

Gold had offered to change the bed sheets, which was nice of him.

_I just wondered if he even knew where to find them? Oh well, I'm sure he would find them eventually. Gold was relentless after all. _

Once I was all clean and the incriminating bed sheets were thrown into the washing machine we finally both sat down on the sofa.

It was 10pm now, and my stomach was making horrible growling noises.

_Man... I was hungry. But I hadn't got much in the house to eat._

_ I needed to go shopping, and soon._

"You have just reminded me why I hate doing laundry..." Gold whined as he relaxed on the sofa.

"Shut up Gold... it was your fault anyway..." I retorted, folding my arms.

I didn't like being hungry, I got even more irritable than usual.

Gold looked at me with a shocked expression.

"How was it my fault? You were the one who made the mess!"

"Yes, because YOU made me!"

Sighing to myself I knew that this was normal for me, Gold and I sniping at each other occasionally, and then managing to have the best sex ever.

That was life right now.

He smiled and wrapped an arm around my shoulder.

"I'll take that as a compliment."

"Whatever..."

Then my stomach made the loudest grumbling sound ever, loud enough for Gold to hear. He chuckled.

"You hungry?"

"..maybe..." I murmured, hoping he wouldn't make some terrible joke about it.

"Well... why don't we go out and grab a pizza or something?"

That didn't seem like such a bad idea, and besides the shop was literally a few blocks away from my apartment.

_It would be okay to go out that far, wouldn't it? _

"...I'm not paying for it..." I grumbled.

It was his idea so he could pay.

Gold's eyes widened as he scoffed at my remark.

"Hello? You are working and have regular income? Why do I have to pay when I am basically broke?"

I knew he was joking, Gold always managed to survive somehow.

If he didn't have any money he would either beg off his mother, or if that failed try to butter up Crystal.

_Or me..._

"You suggested it..."

"I did...but that doesn't mean I should pay for it!"

I unfolded my arms and just looked at the dark haired boy.

"So...I let you fuck my brains out, and yet you won't buy a pizza? I'd say you owe me."

The look on his face was priceless. He had no idea if I was joking or just being rude.

Maybe it was a bit of both, but it was also true.

_Why should he be stingy, and why should I always let him have whatever he wanted?_

I watched as he sighed.

"...alright, you got me there..."

So that was how I got Gold to buy me a pizza.

_Guilt tripping.. such a wonderful thing. Whoever invented it I seriously would have shook them by the hand._

But, still I felt a little uneasy about leaving my apartment for obvious reasons.

And the horrible gut feeling I was receiving didn't help matters.

Once Gold and I finally decided to leave my apartment it was dark outside.

The sky was devoid of clouds so you could see the moon. It was still pleasantly warm, considering the sun set a few hours ago.

We walked side by side, keeping a suitable distance apart so no-one would suspect anything.

_Actually, that was just to make me feel better. I didn't want to walk too close, or too far apart in case it seemed too suspicious._

As we finally turned the corner and saw the shop in sight there was a crowd of people outside.

It seemed like some sort of commotion had happened, or was happening.

"What's going on?" Gold asked, probably to himself, but he always said things out loud.

I rolled my eyes, not really caring.

_Maybe they found a bomb in the pizza shop... yeah a totally plausible idea._

Even so we ended up walking over to find out what the problem was.

There were a lot of trainers hanging around, all of them talking amongst themselves about some sort of tournament.

I didn't catch all of the conversation, but what I did notice was a girl who was taking photos of everyone.

_Was she a reporter? A photographer?_

"Well...shall I go and order?" Gold asked, indicating with his thumb to go inside.

"Yeah... I'll wait here..."

He nodded and entered the shop, leaving me outside with all these people.

I still had no idea why they were gathering outside a pizza shop. Outside the Pokemon Centre would have been better, _well, for me anyway._

I sighed, feeling the wind tousle my hair before disappearing into the atmosphere.

It was so loud around all these people, I could hardly think straight.

That was it, I needed to walk.

And I did.

I just walked up the street so their voices all merged into background noise, and finally I could think again.

For a moment I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

_Maybe a part of me was worried, worried about bumping into him..._

"Hey!"

I leapt up in shock when a voice entered my ears.

Turning swiftly on my heels I discovered it was only the girl with the camera.

She smiled at me, holding the camera tightly in her hands.

"Are you here about the legendary tournament too?" She asked me, and straight away I was thinking '_what the fuck is she talking about?'_

"What tournament?"

I watched as the wind tousled her long black hair as she pulled out a newspaper from her handbag.

Slowly and cautiously she handed it to me.

"It's in here! I've been sent here to take photos of all the competitors for the local newspaper, and of course the legendary guest"

And it was true.

Apparently some amazing tournament was being held in Goldenrod starting from tomorrow.

_I wonder who the main legendary 'guest' was... considering Red was working here. _

I rolled my eyes and shoved the newspaper back into her hands.

"... not interested..."

Her large emerald eyed sparkled as she looked like I had just crushed all her dreams.

"But, you are a trainer right?"

_And what if I was?_

"...yes I am..."

"And, you are a strong trainer too, correct?"

"Look... I already said I am not interested, okay?"

I wanted to stay calm, I really did.

Once again she looked hurt, like she almost expected me to jump at this chance.

She shrugged weakly.

"Alright then... sorry for bothering you..."

And I watched as she walked back to the crowd of bustling trainers.

It still didn't make sense to why they were congregating outside the pizza shop.

I folded my arms and leant against the wall, waiting for Gold to hurry up.

_Seriously... were they going to Italy for this pizza?_

"...well this is a pleasant surprise..."

All the fine hairs on my body stood on edge as my eyes slowly and mechanically moved to the direction of the voice.

_I knew that voice... too well._

I unfolded my arms, standing up straight as the figure approached me.

Feeling my heart speed up dramatically in my chest I realised that it was Cyan!

_Stalking me yet again it seemed._

"...and here I was thinking that you were too ill to make it into work today?" He mocked me, smiling.

Looking at his face I noticed all the visible bruises that smothered his features.

He had a cut lip which had swollen slightly, there was dark bruising around his left eye and there was dried blood just underneath his nose.

_I did all of that?_

"Get the fuck away from me!" I cried out, wanting this freak to leave me alone.

Cyan chuckled.

"...aren't you pleased to see that I am okay after that terrible beating you gave me? Now... what would the police say if reported it as physical abuse?"

He was taunting me, trying to get a reaction out of me, and it would not work.

_I had an alibi, so it didn't matter what he did._

"I don't care what you do, I am not scared of you"

"I never said you were scared Silver..." He said coyly, standing right in front of me, with his hands in his pockets.

"Have I really fucked your head up that much?"

I glared at the blue eyed boy that stood right in my line of fire.

_I could hit him... I could..._

"If you don't want to end up in hospital I suggest you get the fuck out of my way." I warned, feeling adrenaline start to flood my veins with every second that passed.

I watched as Cyan shook his head.

"Is violence always the answer for you? Well...I shouldn't be surprised really. No wonder no-one loves you, or wants to be around you... you're a psychopath!"

I felt my hands clench into fists.

_No... that wasn't true. Gold did, he wanted to be near me, he cared for me, and that was all I needed._

"...and no wonder your brother wants to kill himself because he has to put up WITH YOUR SHIT!" I spat.

Cyan's eyes widened for a moment before he frowned.

"Now that was a low blow, even for you...but still, at least I know who it was who told him to quit being a Pokemon trainer..."

For that moment I felt a part of me die inside.

_Shit! He knew it was me? Or was he bluffing so I could confess?_

_ No, that wasn't happening!_

"...and why the fuck are you telling me this?"

Cyan's eyes narrowed in disgust as his face neared mine.

"Ever since that day... all he has done is beat himself up about it...he tried to release his Pokemon... and he even tried killing himself today..."

_Shit, this was way out of hand. _

_Why on Earth would some kid want to try to end his life over something I had said? It was ridiculous. _

I kept up this façade as I glared at Cyan.

"...I repeat, why the fuck are you telling me this?!"

Cyan's cold blue eyes diverted to the floor, before turning to glare at me with disgust.

"...he tried overdosing on a bunch of pills, and because he didn't die straight away his liver is basically useless now. The doctor's said he urgently needs a liver transplant otherwise he will die!"

_And this was all because of me? _

_Was that why Cyan hated me so much?_

I took a deep breath, hoping Gold would seriously hurry up right now.

"Oh right..."

"...is that all you have to say?! Just **_'oh right'_**?!"

Cyan got closer to my face, and if looks could kill I would have died a thousand times over.

"...I knew it was** YOU** who told my brother to quit being a trainer!"

Without realising it I had been backed up against the wall, trying so hard to keep it all together.

_How did he find out? Did his brother give him an accurate description or something? _

_But still, I was way stronger than this prick so what if I did say all those things? _

_He couldn't do shit to me._

"So what if it was me? What exactly are you going to do?" I challenged him, narrowing my eyes at the shorter boy.

Deep inside my heart was thundering against my ribcage, in anger and shock.

I couldn't believe he found out.

**"HEY!" **

I heard a voice which made both Cyan and myself turn to face that direction.

It was Gold, _minus the pizza for some reason._

I rolled my eyes.

_Great... things were definitely going to get worse now_.

As he ran over to us he looked from me to Cyan, and then back to me.

"What the fuck is going on?" He asked.

Cyan smiled, and looked at Gold.

Now he must have realised that he looked just like him.

"Ah, here he is... the infamous Gold... the person who is better than me apparently..."

It didn't take long for Gold to figure out what he meant.

"So, you are the guy who tried to kiss Silver?!"

_He sounded angry... why? We weren't a couple or anything. _

Cyan kept that evil grin on his face as devil eyes glared into Gold's soul.

"I am... and what of it? You couldn't do anything more to me than Silver already has."

Deep inside I knew he wasn't just talking about his face, he was talking about his brother, and how I had somehow created that chain of events to unfold.

"..and besides, why would you defend him? After all, you two aren't a couple, nor do you have any feelings for each other..."

I wanted to speak up, to put my point across, but Gold beat me to it.

"Yes we do!"

My eyes widened as I listened to what he said in my defence.

"...Silver can be really horrible sometimes, even a little heartless... but I know that deep inside he is a good person. He does have a soft side, a caring side no-one ever sees because he is too scared to open up to anyone. And we do have feelings for each other... well I know that I have feelings for him...and that is why I will defend him..."

Gold looked across to me for a moment.

My heart was dying, deep inside.

_I wished he hadn't said that, I wished he would have denied it. _

_Cyan knew now, he knew how important we were to each other. That just played right into his hands._

"...interesting..." Cyan mused, looking from me to Gold, and back again.

Then he smiled, a wicked smile.

"You faggots are all the same...always thinking with your fucking dicks..."

"WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY?!" I bellowed, taking step towards Cyan.

_I would have willingly busted up his face even more. _

_Seriously, it would have helped me right now._

"Silver... calm down, I can handle this..." Gold issued calmly.

"Awww... I must admit this is a very touching scene...too bad all good things must come to an end at some point..."

_What did he mean? Was he going to try to split us up?_

_Wait, what? _

_We aren't even a couple!_

"What the hell is that meant to mean?" Gold asked in annoyance.

I watched as Cyan started to laugh.

"Let's just say Silver won't be in Goldenrod City for much longer..."

There was no way I was going to let this ass-hole drive me out of this town.

I had lived here a lot longer than he had worked here.

_I wasn't going to be dictated to by this little prick._

"...and how do you figure that out?"

Cyan eyes narrowed dangerously.

"...I got you transferred to Kanto instead... Celadon to be exact, so you won't be working in Goldenrod any more."

I felt a part of me sink into a never ending pit of despair.

_Kanto? There was no way I could commute to work... it would cost too much, and that was why he did it!_

A feral growl emitted from my throat as I was trying so hard not to flip out, and kill this punk right here.

"Kanto? Why the hell did you do that?!" Gold blurted out, his voice sounding pained.

_Now I knew...I knew he felt something for me_.

This was so wrong, and it was going to end badly I knew that now.

Cyan's mouth twisted into a grin once again, seemingly pleased with what he had achieved.

"...that's what he gets for trying to kill my little brother..."

"W-what? Silver would never kill anyone!"

Gold continued to defend me and a part of me wished he wouldn't.

_I could defend myself, I didn't need him trying to fight my battles._

"...looks like you don't know your boyfriend very well then, do you?"

_So that was it...I was going to be working in Celadon City? _

_How the hell had this happened?_

"I know Silver better than you ever will, just because you are jealous he chose me over you..."

_It felt weird having people fighting over me... _

Cyan's eyes twitched as his voice rose in pitch.

"I am **NOT** jealous!"

Gold raised an eyebrow at the blue eyed boy.

"Oh really? Then why did you try to kiss him? You don't try to kiss people you don't like, and you have only acted like an ass since he pushed you away. I would say that's either jealousy or desperation to me..."

I looked across from Gold to Cyan, hating how they looked so very similar.

At least now I could look at Cyan and not see Gold. I just hoped that when I looked at Gold I wouldn't see Cyan any more.

And the fact I had that nightmare about him.

"Well... if I am desperate you must be desperate too for actually defending this guy!" Cyan retorted, pointing to me.

_Hey! Don't bring me into this!_

"...If you seriously want to keep your balls in perfect working fashion I suggest you SHUT THE FUCK UP!" I yelled angrily.

It was now I noticed the group of Pokemon trainers had started to take a keen interest in our heated argument.

They watched, seemingly intrigued, but didn't dare make any noise.

"...and you would know all about that, wouldn't you? Just face it, both of you, you are nothing more than a cheap fuck, and a lifetime of regret"

I really was losing my patience here, I was doubting the likeliness of me holding back for much longer.

"At least we can get laid... you would probably have to pay some-one to sleep with you, and even then they would be paying you to keep your fucking clothes on..." I spat vehemently, feeling proud of my insult.

I watched as Cyan's eyebrow twitched in annoyance.

Then just before he was about to say anything I heard a voice interrupt our argument.

"Excuse me? Can I take a photograph of you?"

It was the dark haired girl with the camera, and she was speaking to Gold.

I watched as he blushed slightly.

_Well, Gold loved being a little attention whore at the best of times, and given a photo opportunity he was there. Like a moth to a flame. _

Then I diverted my gaze to Cyan, watching as he got angrier and angrier.

"What the fuck woman?! Can't you see we are arguing?!"

Her emerald eyes blinked at Cyan for a few moments before shrugging.

"I can see that, now if you'll excuse me I have a job to do..."

_What, was Cyan going to start insulting an innocent girl now? _

Gold smiled sheepishly as she readied her camera to take a snapshot of his goofy grinning face.

That was until Cyan forcefully knocked into her, causing the camera to fall onto the ground with a crash.

_That was it. _

_I had lost it._

"WHAT THE FUCK IS YOUR PROBLEM?!" I screamed at him, grabbing the blue eyed boy my the scruff of his t-shirt.

I watched as he just smirked.

He had no remorse, no guilt, no nothing.

He was hollow inside, with the blackest eyes.

_With Devil's eyes..._

"...if my brother dies because of you I swear I will destroy everything and everyone you love!"

I tightened my grip on him, really wanting to smash his face in yet again.

I didn't think I could damage him any more though.

_He could try, it's not like I loved anything._

"Good luck with that... I don't love anything or anyone in this world"

And then I watched as Cyan's eyes shifted from me to Gold, and then back to me.

He smiled again, sending a horrible shiver throughout my body.

"...for now..."

In rage I let go of him and pushed him forcefully backwards.

Cyan glanced at all of us before deciding to leave the scene, tail between his legs.

_That's it. Run you little fucking Buneary...while you can. _

I turned on my heel to face Gold, who was helping the girl pick up her camera, and attempting to fix whatever it was that had fallen out.

"Fucking ass hole...why did he have to go and do that?" Gold grumbled.

I didn't offer to help pick up the pieces of the camera.

I did my heroic scene for the day.

She tucked a piece of black hair behind her ear as she smiled kindly at Gold. Obviously she was grateful for his help, even though it was me who chased Cyan, the poison boy away.

"It's okay...he's obviously on his man period." She mumbled, giggling afterwards.

"He's on something I'll give you that..."

I folded my arms and leant against the wall, feeling the wind tousle my hair once again before disappearing into the atmosphere.

_He would destroy everything I love? How would he do that? _

_And besides, I didn't love anything, or anyone... did I?_

"Thank you though... both of you... for stepping in and sending that freak packing." The girl thanked us as she stood up, camera seemingly fixed.

Gold smiled while I just shrugged it off.

Compliments were wasted on me.

"Thank you for interrupting... I swear he was beginning to annoy the ever loving crap out of me." Gold joked, pulling a funny face that was supposed to be Cyan I assumed.

He started to mimic his whiny voice, pretending to argue at me, and of course I just ignored him.

_At least Gold could find the funny side of everything. _

The emerald eyed girl smiled.

"You two are so cute together, you know that?"

My eyes widened as slowly and mechanically I turned to face Gold and as soon as our eyes locked I swiftly turned away again.

_ Me and him... cute? Okay... this girl was high or something..._

"You really think so?" Gold asked, obviously curious and I just rolled my eyes.

_That's it Gold, give the game away why don't you? _

She nodded.

"Oh! How rude of me, I haven't introduced myself properly! My name is Violet. I work for the local newspaper and I am here to take photographs and gain information about this tournament that is being held tomorrow."

"Tournament...?" Gold questioned, turning to look at me.

I waved him off.

_ Like it was my thing? Especially if the legendary guest was the great champion Red. _

_Mister-I-Have-No-Personality-Please-Worship-Me. I don't think so._

"Yes! Great trainers of Goldenrod are gathering to test out their skills against our legendary guest"

Placing a hand to my head I could just picture Red's face when he actually discovered how many people were here because of him.

_Probably as expressive as orange peel..._

"Sounds interesting..." Gold mused.

"Sounds like a waste of time..." I added in.

Violet looked to me, her face expressed nothing but shock.

_Did she even know Red, like know him properly? Seriously, if she did and she still liked him... then there was something wrong in that girl's head._

"...but you don't know who the mystery guest is!" Gold exclaimed dramatically, like it was the biggest kept secret ever in the history of Goldenrod.

It was so blatantly obvious even an idiot could figure it out.

_So that made Gold an even bigger idiot._

"Do you really care?"

Gold pouted like a child.

"It might be some-one famous..."

"...or some-one who's personality is as dull as dish water..."

"Hey! Don't speak about Red like that!" Violet blurted out accidentally, and then quickly covered her mouth with her hand.

I rolled my eyes.

_So much for this famous guest keeping everything under wraps._

"Red is the legendary guest?!" Gold exclaimed.

_I didn't know why he was so excited._

_ He saw Red just the other day when he was searching for me. _

Violet nodded and smiled.

"Yeah! Everyone is super excited about meeting him. He hardly ever ventures away from Mt Silver so for him to be in Goldenrod is a big honour for us"

I placed a hand to my head.

_For fuck's sake... it was only Red...no big deal. So what, he was the Pokemon Champion, he still ate, pissed and slept the same as anyone else._

"No wonder all these trainers look excited..." Gold mused.

I watched as Violet smiled.

"Anyway... I really should be getting back to taking photograph's of the competitors..."

_Thank God for that..._

Gold's face expressed confusion for a moment.

"Oh... okay..."

The emerald eyed girl held her camera tightly in her hands.

"...but as a thank you gift for getting rid of that arrogant prick from earlier I would like to take a photo of the two of you to put in the newspaper"

_Fucking hell no! I wasn't going to let anyone take a photo of me! Especially with Gold, he ruined so many photos as it was..._

"Really?! You would do that?!" Gold sounded excited.

_Like I said... attention whore. _

Violet nodded.

"Of course! You two really helped me out so it's the least I can do!"

I didn't really have much a choice.

Gold seemed to have decided for the both of us. He wrapped an arm around my tense shoulder and smiled his goofiest smile yet, while I just remained indifferent, not expressing any emotion whatsoever.

I watched as Violet took the photograph, and the flash blinded my eyes for a second.

"Look out for your picture in tomorrow's newspaper!"

"We definitely will!"

It was now I noticed Gold still had his arm around my shoulder, and it stayed like that even when Violet bid her farewells and jogged back to the group of trainers.

At least they weren't staring at us any more.

I sighed.

_Great, everyone was going to see my ugly face in the paper, and know of my apparent heroic act. _

_It wasn't heroic, Cyan was just a bastard._

"...what a weird day..." Gold commented, looking at me.

_Yeah, that was true._

"I can't believe Cyan... fucking getting me transferred..." I groaned.

Not that I had an issue with working somewhere else, and usually nothing would have kept me tied down to this place.

_But this time there was. _

I needed to do something about that.

"What's going to happen?" Gold asked, his voice sounding pained for a moment.

I knew that he didn't want our arrangement to end, or whatever it was that we had.

Gold even admitted that he had feelings for me yet again, in front of Cyan!

_Were we more than just an arrangement? _

I shrugged, leaning against Gold's side as I sighed quietly.

"...I don't know..."

"Do you want to go?"

Weakly I shook my head.

_ I didn't want to leave him... I didn't want to leave what we had. It was good, it made me feel slightly more happier than if I was alone. _

_Gold was the only constant thing in my life. If he was gone... I don't know how I would cope..._

"...then stay here! Go to the department store tomorrow and tell your Manager everything that Cyan has been doing to you. The stalking...the obsessive behaviour...he will sure as hell get fired for that!"

I felt Gold's other arm wrap around my shoulder so he was hugging me in the middle of the street.

And I did the same, clutching his t-shirt tightly.

My body trembled slightly as the realisation of what Cyan had done was sinking in.

_He was trying to get back at me, trying to make me feel as worthless as he did right now._

"...why should I stay Gold? What do I have keeping me here?"

I wanted him to be honest with me and hoped he said that he was the thing keeping me here.

Instead he didn't say anything and just hugged me tighter.

I closed my eyes, feeling my heart get heavier and heavier.

"You can't let Cyan win..."

"...I won't..."

"But if you go to Celadon then he has won!" Gold argued and he was right.

_Maybe I needed to get away? So then I could ignore the horrible sickening feeling that continued to creep up into my throat, suffocating me. _

Every time I looked at him my heart would thunder in my chest, I found it so hard to breathe, and my personality just broke apart into thousands of tiny pieces.

I needed to stop that from happening.

I didn't want to fall apart.

"It doesn't matter if I go anyway, you will move on and get over it. Crystal will be there for you and soon you won't even remember what we had..."

I tried to kid myself into thinking this.

_That if Gold somehow agreed with me then I wouldn't feel so bad. Going to Kanto would mean it would be harder to travel back here. Money would be the issue, as it usually is, and as much as I wanted to stay I still needed to pay bills. _

Gold moved away from the embrace with a hurt look in his amber eyes.

"It doesn't matter?! It will matter! Silver, the past few days have really made me realise how much I need you in my life. What we had...have...it's special to me, and always will be. You have never allowed anyone to get this close to you, and that means something to me. I always want to be that one person who you let hug you when you're feeling down, who you let kiss away all your problems, and who you wake up to in the morning when you have a nightmare..."

I could feel my throat tighten up, like I couldn't breathe.

My heart hurt with every beat and I closed my eyes.

_Slowly... I was falling apart. Who was I kidding? I loved Gold...I knew that now, and Cyan knew it too. He would do anything to make sure I was miserable, that I couldn't have the one person who actually mattered to me. _

Slowly I leaned back into the embrace, feeling Gold's arms tighten around me protectively.

"I...need you too..." I mumbled quietly, clinging onto the dark haired boy for dear life.

_If he wasn't in my life then who did I have? I had no-one, Gold was the only person who cared about me._

_ He could deal with my mood swings and hateful comments._

_ He could deal with my abusive nature and argumentative personality._

_ He could deal with my weaknesses... better than I could. _

Taking a deep breath I tried to steady my nerves, it was hopeless.

I wanted to tell him.

_Just tell him! Tell him you love him! Tell him now! _

I opened my mouth, but no words came out. Instead it just sounded like a whine and I sighed.

It was useless.

But as I felt my heart slowly sink deeper into despair I felt it jolt back into actions when I heard Gold mutter the words;

"...I love you Silver..."

_And as I closed my eyes tightly I was sure I felt a single tear fall down my face..._

* * *

**Author's Note. :'( Poor Silver! He loves Gold but cant' say it! And Poor Gold too! Cyan is a home wrecker and is trying to ruin poor Silvy's life! Will he managed to get Silver transferred to Kanto? Please drop me a review, and please rant and rave all you want to about Cyan. ^^ It actually makes me smile.**


	11. Karma, take me away

**Author's Note: Man... this chapter seems to have taken forever to write! The title is based off a song that I love and I thought it fit pretty well with this chapter. So.. try to enjoy what I have planned for all of you ^^;**

* * *

**Chapter Eleven: Karma, take me away**

_I wanted time to just stand still, never to move forward. _

I never wanted realisation to hit me like a rock in the face that when tomorrow came around I would be commuting to Kanto for the foreseeable future.

But time didn't drag, nor did it come to a standstill, in fact it quickened to a pace I was never going to get used to.

Before I knew it Gold had left me back in my apartment to go home. When we kissed each other goodbye it really did feel like the last time, and a part of me sunk into a never ending pit of despair.

And now it was the early hours of the morning and once again I could not sleep. My mind was full of uncertainty, full of questions that desperately needed answers.

_What was I supposed to do now? It was too late to take any of this back, to try to mend what was broken. I was so uncontrollably in love with that idiot Gold it was hurting me with every moment we were apart, but what could I do?_

_ Nothing. _

_I had to go to Kanto, I had to keep earning money to keep my apartment, with or without Gold in my life..._

I placed my head in my hands, gripping it tightly as I bit my lip.

_I should have just told him last night, when he confessed to me... I should have been brave enough to admit it. But I didn't. _

And now I was sitting here at 4am in my dingy old apartment thinking about everything I should have said or done, and there was no way out.

Slowly my ears registered a knock at my front door which made me look up immediately.

_Was it Gold? No, it couldn't be. He would be home by now, tucked up in his lovely warm bed, sleeping peacefully. Unlike me. _

I combed my fingers through my red hair uneasily, hearing the knock at my door yet again.

Well, I couldn't just ignore it.

I stood up, pulling my usual black t-shirt I used to sleep in further down my body self consciously as I left my room. I guess it was out of habit.

Taking a deep breath I picked my apartment keys up from the coffee table and made my way over to the door.

I hoped to God it was either Gold or someone I knew. I didn't fancy having another encounter with Cyan right now.

I pushed the key into the lock and turned, slowly pulling the door open with bated breath.

My eyes were greeted by a flash of blue hair, and narrowed azure eyes glaring right into my soul.

_It was Crystal, but why? It was 4am!_

She folded her arms as her questioning eyes scanned me from head to toe.

_Crap...I was only wearing an old t-shirt and my boxers..._

"Are you going to let me in?"

I moved to the side and watched as she stormed past me like the door frame was about to explode.

She was nervous I could tell, but she was trying to hide it.

As I closed the door and turned on my heel I was greeted by that questioning gaze yet again. But she didn't talk. She just watched me, so I decided to break the ice.

"What the hell are you doing knocking on my front door at 4am?!"

Crystal frowned at my question, like it was a pointless thing to ask. Her eyes watched me for a while, she was waiting for me to say something else.

Then she shook her head slowly;

"...I came here to talk to you..."

"Okay, but you could have picked a more sociable hour..."

Crystal sighed in disappointment. Like she expected me to put up more of a fight or something.

"...I know what you are doing to Gold...simply because you can... because he is an idiot for letting you..."

_Wait what? I am not doing anything to Gold! We just have an arrangement that is all, unless he has told her a different version of events._

She paused for a moment, staring at me with chilling blue eyes, then diverted her gaze away.

"...I'm asking you to stop this, whatever _this_ is. You're hurting him, and I can't think why you would want to hurt him more than necessary"

I don't dare say a word.

I just continued watching her change of expressions.

Blue eyes continued to delve into the very heart of my soul, like she was hoping I would simply say yes and move on. She was aware of our arrangement then. I didn't want to come across as being mean, but truth be told I needed to have Gold in my life.

Now more than ever.

"Anything else?"

Crystal's face looked hurt for a moment before that hurt turned to annoyance. Then it became nothing but anger.

"Look here Silver...Gold is a mess right now, going on about you leaving to go to Kanto, and that he's in fucking love with you?! How the hell did this even happen?! So... you're going to leave him alone... it's the least you can do for him after everything you have done to him."

Her cheeks were red with fury and I couldn't help but feel sad and defeated inside.

Gold told her everything, even the fact he loved me. He must have gone to Crystal's house straight after he left me.

My eyes trailed downwards to the floor.

"...right. I don't see why you are here though."

"Leave Gold alone... for both of your sakes!" She cried out desperately.

_Maybe she saw this as an emotional roller-coaster only headed for disaster, but I didn't. There were ways around this predicament but still, leaving Gold alone forever? Was that what was truly necessary for him to be happy again?_

"I am..." I murmured.

Crystal snorted at my remark.

"You are fucking every five minutes!"

"But it's just sex... it doesn't mean anything..." I lie, and lie to myself.

_Of course it means something! But I can't tell Crystal that can I? She already thinks I am the bad guy here for messing up Gold's head. What about my head? That's just as messed up._

"Yeah, I understand that was the original plan, but in reality this whole arrangement has turned into a big horrible emotional mess! And you need to leave him alone before things get even worse!"

I knew Crystal was doing this for both of us, yet I couldn't help but hate her a little. I was selfish, I didn't want to let Gold go, not yet, not ever.

"I am not responsible for what goes on in his head Crystal..."

I watched as she paced up and down my living room in annoyance, almost laughing at what I just said.

It was obvious she didn't believe a word of it.

_Her eyes diverted everywhere across my room apart from me, the window, the wall, the television set... anywhere but me. _

Then she stood still in front of me, sighing.

"...he loves you, you know?"

I looked away, hating this horrible churning feeling in the pits of my stomach.

_And I loved him. So much. _

Momentarily I closed my eyes, trying to ignore all these emotions that were dragging me down into despair.

"...and I know you care about him too, I just saw it in your eyes..." Crystal remarked.

_Maybe it was so obvious not even I could hide it any more?_

Slowly I walked to the wall resting the back of my head against it as I released a breath I was holding somewhere deep inside of me. My eyes scanned the ceiling, and the only emotion I felt right now was pain.

Crystal sighed and bowed her head.

"Don't you get it? Gold really cares about you, and all you are doing is stamping on him like he doesn't mean anything. You guys don't even have a friendship any more. When you two first met... Gold fought so hard to get you to be his friend. He would never give up, even if I told him countless times to. You were worth fighting for in his eyes. He was so determined, so patient and so stubborn with getting you to open up to him. I'm not judging you for ending your friendship, but you can't kill it with what you are doing now!"

All throughout this my voice wouldn't work, like if I even tried to speak the words would become a tangled mess in my throat.

_It was useless._

_ But she was right._

_ Gold did fight for our friendship when we were kids. I was hard work, and Gold never gave up, and now she wanted me to give up on him so that he could move on, and be happy? Did I deserve to give him that at least?_

My eyes continued to scan the ceiling as Crystal's hands held my arms gently.

"Silver, what is going on inside that head of yours? I got the whole fighting thing, and even the whole avoiding thing. Even the slip ups and the fucking agreement to some degree. But you have an alternative now to save you both from this pain. I can see that you are not happy with this either..."

She wanted me to admit that she was right, she wanted me to agree to this.

_But what was the point? I was leaving for Kanto this afternoon, so the likeliness of this arrangement still working even though we were both in different regions was pretty slim. _

I sighed.

"I don't know what you are talking about, everything was fine until people started interfering..."

I wasn't aiming it her, even though she probably thought I was.

_No, I was talking about Cyan. Ever since I first met him he followed my every move, knew almost everything about me, and now was aware of the fact I loved Gold._

Crystal looked sad as I finally managed to look into her eyes.

"Fair enough. I don't care what you do, and you can continue tricking yourself into thinking things are fine for the rest of your life. But, leave Gold out of your problems. He doesn't need any of this."

I frowned.

_ Did Gold even know Crystal was here trying to get me to back off? I bet he didn't, and she just did this to try to play the role of supportive best friend. _

I folded my arms, brushing her hands off me.

"Gold may be stupid but he knows how to say no, and he knows when to quit. If he was so upset about this whole thing he could've have told me to my face instead of sending you round here like a lapdog..."

Her blue eyes widened considerably as those words stung her ears.

_Okay, lapdog might have been a bit harsh._

"Are you telling me there is nothing wrong with what you two are doing to each other?"

I rolled my eyes, not wishing to have this conversation at 4am in the morning. I should have at least attempted going back to sleep, even if it would have royally failed.

"We have sex, that is all it is. No emotions, no feelings, no nothing. I know to you that might be a little weird, or even fucked up, but it's none of your business..."

"Don't you even think about throwing the homophobe card in my face! You are the most homophobic person I have ever met in my entire life!" She cursed at me, wagging a finger dangerously in my face.

I shrugged.

_ I was over that. I was over that the minute I realised I loved Gold, so why was I keeping that important bit of information to myself? Should I tell her about it?_

"That doesn't bother me any more... I accepted it... I accepted it the minute I..."

I stopped, not wanting to continue.

Crystal looked into my eyes expectantly, wanting me to continue.

But I didn't. I just went quiet.

"You accepted it the minute what... Silver?" She pursued and I felt my heart rattle angrily inside my chest.

_Why couldn't I just be honest and tell her? Was it so hard to just tell her that I was in love with Gold? Was it so hard to admit that I needed him in my life? _

I swallowed hard, feeling my throat tighten up like I couldn't breathe any more.

_I love him... so much..._

"...I love him!" I blurted out.

Crystal's eyes widened and then something weird happened.

I just started crying, I didn't want to but I couldn't help it.

_Gold... was so important to me...and yet I would have to put all that aside just so he could be happy._

"...you love... him?" She repeated, and slowly I nodded.

I closed my eyes, trying to fight off these horrible tears that continued to fall down my face.

Usually I never cry over anything.

_Last time I cried over something was when my dad started to beat me...so it had been ten years since the last time I have cried..._

Then I felt Crystal wrap her arms around me, cuddling me.

Normally I would have pushed her away, or made some horrible comment.

Not this time.

I just broke down, hating feeling so weak and pathetic.

"Why didn't you tell me you felt the same way?" She soothed, her voice sounding calm now.

I clung to the blue haired girl like she was a lifeline.

_What else did I have right now? _

As the tears fell down my face I tried my best to tell her my reasons.

"...it's complicated..."

"How so? I would have thought the most complicated part of all this was being able to admit to yourself that you loved him..."

_That was also true. It took a while for me to realise that when I was with Gold in a weird yet wonderful way I was happy, genuinely happy. _

_I also knew that if Gold wasn't around any more... that happiness would fade away. _

I sniffled.

"It was...but now things are even more complicated..."

I felt her small hands rub small circles on my back as I tried so hard to stop crying.

_ Why was I even crying? Was it because I was going to Kanto? Was it because I knew that if I let Gold go it would be for the best? Or was it because I was scared?_

"Tell me Silver..." Crystal murmured quietly.

I took a deep breath, trying to steady my nerves.

_I needed to tell her all about Cyan, about his psychotic tendencies and how Gold might be in danger if he stayed with me._

"A few days ago... I battled this kid...and as usual I said some really nasty things...I just thought nothing would come of it, but I was wrong. Then...I find out that I am working with his older brother... Cyan... who seemed okay at the time...that was until he somehow found out it was me who hurt his baby brother..."

I pulled away from the embrace, watching as Crystal looked deeply into my watery eyes.

"...then what happened?"

I cleared my throat.

"...it turns out his brother tried to kill himself over what I had said... and Cyan went crazy. He's been stalking me and watching every move I have made...it's really creepy. But, last night...Gold and I were going to get a pizza... and we bumped into Cyan...he goes mental, saying he knows it was me who hurt his brother and that he is going to destroy everything I love..."

I watched as Crystal gasped.

Now she understood why I was getting so upset over this whole situation.

I never wanted to drag Gold into my problems. That was never my intention.

"...and that means Gold, right?"

I nodded.

"Yes...Gold basically told Cyan he loved me...and I could see that glimmer in his eyes that he might target Gold to get at me. I don't want that..."

My eyes trailed downwards to the floor as my heart felt like it was made of stone. All because of my own stupid actions I had caused my own downfall.

"All the more reason to let Gold go while you still can..." Crystal encouraged and I knew she was right.

_As much as I hated it, and I didn't want to let Gold go I knew I had to. His welfare was far too important to me, not that I would ever tell him that though..._

I wiped my face and sniffled, relieved that the tears had finally stopped.

"I... can't..."

"You haven't even tried to..."

"I can't!" I cried out pathetically, making Crystal jump in shock.

I ran my fingers through my messed up red hair, biting my lip hard.

_I needed him...without him I was nothing..._

"...Silver..." She murmured sadly, placing a hand on my arm.

As her fingers rubbed my bare arm slowly her soothing voice lulled me.

"...if you love Gold... you can let go..."

It wasn't that simple.

_In my head Gold was the only constant thing in my life, like time. If time came to a standstill nothing would work any more, everything would stop... and that would happen to me. My life would come to a standstill...unable to cope with anything any more._

"...you need to see Gold one last time and tell him that you can't continue this arrangement any more..."

"I can't see him... no way..." I mumbled, knowing if I did I would probably die more and more inside until there was nothing left.

Crystal nodded weakly and continued to rub my arm affectionately.

"...I know this is hard for you Silver..."

"You have no idea how this feels..."

_Crystal lived this amazing life, yeah okay her parents were getting divorced, but she was lucky. Lucky that she was so naïve not to fall in love with a complete and utter idiot. _

_Unlike me._

_ So she had no idea what it felt like._

"But... if you stay with him... and continue this arrangement what if Cyan hurts him? Won't you feel guilty about it? Regret your decisions?"

I rolled my eyes.

I already regretted my decision when I said those horrible things to his brother.

"...don't you think I know that?" I snapped, not meaning to.

Crystal moved her hand away and sighed softly.

"Talk to Gold... tell him all this, and he might see sense..."

I chuckled quietly.

_ Gold and sense in the same sentence? Please..._

"He doesn't want me to go to Kanto, he has already made his feelings quite clear... so if I turn around and tell him I don't want to see him again...it will hurt him..."

Crystal looked up at me with large azure eyes that sparkled in sadness.

"...but being with him will hurt him too..."

It was a no win situation.

He would get hurt regardless of the outcome, so I had no choice.

_ I would have to see Gold one last time and make sure that I ended this arrangement, even though I honestly didn't want to. Just thinking about it was causing my heart to slowly tear itself apart. Why was life so cruel?_

* * *

Before Crystal left she mentioned about Gold's birthday being only a week away, and that she understood if I didn't turn up to the venue.

_ Like I could anyway! I would be in Kanto, working no doubt. And it wasn't like anyone expected me to show up. Since when did I become the life and soul of any party?_

When she left I allowed myself time to steady my nerves and try to understand all the information.

_I had to do this, for myself and for Gold, as much as I didn't want to. _

So when I finally mustered the courage I phoned him.

Once again I was greeted with the usual_ 'prank call'_ voice, this time it was something along the lines of '_Asylum Seeker's Refuge'_.

_ Like I should have been shocked about that? _

But, still I managed to persuade Gold to meet me by the bridge that linked Goldenrod and the next town even though it was still early in the morning.

I half expected him to groan about it, or make up some sort of excuse, but he didn't. It was like he wanted to see me.

And now I had to fight the battle in my head.

_Should I cut Gold loose from my problems? Was that what he needed?_

I got dressed in my usual black attire, packed a few items of clothing into a rucksack, and tried to at least flatten my hair. Usually it never listened to me anyway, and would just stick up in odd directions or become frizzy for no good reason.

_Still, why was I concerned over my appearance? It wasn't a date, it was to tell Gold I couldn't see him any more. I was going to Kanto, and that was that. _

I frowned at my reflection in the mirror.

_Since when did I become so ill?_

My skin was so pale it was almost transparent, my eyes were so dull and grey they could be mistaken for a zombie or something, and a few spots had erupted on my forehead.

_Great...just what I needed. _

Sighing to myself I decided that I needed to do this.

Crystal was right, Gold was in danger if he spent any more time with me, especially with Cyan sniffing around. I owed him that much at least.

_If I loved him I could let go... _

Taking a deep breath I quickly left my apartment, wanting to get this all over and done with as soon as possible.

The journey towards the bridge was a drag, in fact it felt like I had been walking forever.

_ Maybe it was all in my head? After all... the bridge wasn't that far away from my apartment block. _

I wished it was a million miles away just so it would prevent this from happening just for a few seconds or minutes longer.

I didn't want to see the look of hurt on his face when I told him, I didn't want to see him get upset or cry over it. That was something I would never forgive myself for.

_But still... this was my mess and I needed to sort it out, even if it meant hurting the one person who had always been there for me throughout my life. _

_Sometimes you had to be cruel to be kind in life._

In annoyance I kicked a stone into the gutter as I gripped the straps of my rucksack tightly, feeling the cool summer breeze waft through my hair. The sun was starting to rise high in sky, illuminating the soft white fluffy clouds that passed by.

_Why did it have to be such a lovely day?_

Sighing to myself I watched the bridge come into view as I walked closer.

No-one was there so I was early, which probably wasn't the greatest option in the world.

_Being alone with my own thoughts for company was just blatant suicide right now. I might even think my way out of doing this somehow, trying to find a way out of this mess, to try to sort it out without losing or hurting Gold._

As I walked up to the bridge and leant against the railing I sighed in defeat.

It was useless.

_This whole scenario was nothing more than a game to Cyan, a twisted game of chess, and Gold and I were nothing but pawns. Soon it was going to be checkmate, and game over for both of us..._

"Silver!"

I swiftly turned around feeling my heart sink like a wounded battleship at sea as my eyes met a pair of amber ones, and a crazy grinning face.

It was Gold, as happy and as stupid as usual.

_And I was going to destroy all of that within a few minutes... _

I nodded weakly, watching as the dark haired boy bounced up to me happily.

"...wow... you don't look well at all..." He commented quietly, as if he was trying to spare my feelings.

I shrugged, not caring about myself right now. I knew I looked hideous, tell me something knew.

"...I'll deal with it..."

Gold raised an eyebrow at me as he stood beside me.

"Why did you want to see me so urgently?"

I felt a lump congeal in my throat, making it harder for me to breathe.

_Why did I actually want to see him? Was it because I wanted to hear his voice, or see his face again? Or did I really want to break him apart?_

He watched me expectantly, edging me to talk to him, but every time I tried I couldn't muster the courage to say the words.

_When did I become this weak, pathetic person? _

I looked at the ground in sadness, gripping my hands on the railing tightly, frightened that if I let go I might just collapse in a heap on the floor.

"...Silver?"

I felt Gold's hand on my shoulder and once again I tensed up.

_How could I allow this to happen? If I let Gold keep touching me, to keep feeling sorry for me there was no way he could move on from this. _

I bit my lip hard, knowing that I would draw blood if I wasn't careful.

"...I can't..."

"You can't what... Silver?" Gold pursued.

_I hated myself for this. _

_I hated how I couldn't just come out with what I wanted to say. Usually being horrible to anyone came as natural to me as breathing, but not any more. He had crawled so deep underneath my skin I didn't want him to not be there. _

_Things would not be right. _

Leaning on the railing with my head on my arms I sighed.

"... I can't do this... any more..."

"Do what?"

I raised my eyes to his concerned face.

"_This!_"

I emphasised by waving my hand around at both of us, and then the penny dropped.

His expression changed from concerned to saddened in a matter of seconds.

_Please... don't look at me like that..._

"Why not? What's changed? I thought... this was what you wanted?"

"It was..." I mumbled, keeping my eyes focused ahead of me, trying to ignore those amber eyes that were burning into my very soul.

"...I don't understand...I love you Silver..." Gold murmured, and I could hear his voice breaking.

I swallowed hard, closing my eyes tightly as my throat seemed to just close up, stopping me from breathing.

_Just breathe! You have to do this! You have to..._

"...we can't do this any more..."

I could feel my eyes begin to sting and I knew that I wanted to cry, to let it all out, but I couldn't. This was bad enough without me breaking down.

I pressed my forehead against my arms again when his voice entered my ears.

"Is this about that Cyan guy? If it is... we can get through this!"

I felt Gold's hand hold onto my arm desperately, trying to find a way to sort this mess out, but this was for the best.

_ Crystal was right, I was infecting him, poisoning him and dragging him into my mess. He didn't deserve this. _

As my heart continued to hurt with every beat I swallowed hard.

"...if you are with me... he will hurt you..."

"I don't care! I don't care...as long as I'm with you..."

His voice went quiet, like he was trying to keep it all together.

Still, I kept my eyes closed, trying to breathe.

_ It was so hard... I knew this was hurting Gold... and hurting me too. He wouldn't let this go as easily as I would have liked._

"...you know that can't happen..." I murmured.

Suddenly my body was being pulled off the railing to turn to face the dark haired boy. His eyes were clouded over with tears as his bottom lip quivered ever so slightly.

"But it can! Together we can get through anything! You know that as much as I do!"

I shook my head weakly, hating how he was looking at me.

_Please... don't look at me like that Gold..._

"...I have to sort this out Gold... and this shit is happening because of what I did! I won't drag you into it..."

His hands held my arms gently, and I felt his body trembling under the pressure.

He was breaking, and I was witnessing it all.

My eyes diverted to the ground, unable to keep eye contact with him any more.

_It was killing me..._

"...you know I won't give up on you... I won't give up!" He cried out.

I looked at his face momentarily, just enough time to witness tears fall down his face.

_And now it felt like my heart was being ripped from my chest. _

_Gold would never give up, I knew that... even if I walked away he would probably follow me to Kanto and back. But, I couldn't let him do that. He was in danger if he was with me, Cyan would target him and then I could never forgive myself. _

_No, I had to do something._

"...what if I want you to give up on me?" I muttered quietly.

Gold shook his head desperately as more tears fell down his tanned cheeks. Inhaling deeply he tried to steady his wavering voice.

"...no...I can't do that... I love you!"

His hands tightened their grip on my arms as he leant his head against my chest.

I felt his body convulse, and his chest heave painfully with every breath he took.

_Why was I doing this to him? To the one person who I genuinely loved? Yes... I knew why I had to do this.. because I did love him, and I needed to cut him loose from me and my poisonous life._

"...I'm going to Kanto Gold... and you can't stop me..."

His hands moved so he was now holding me tightly in a vice-grip hug, and refused to let me go. I could hear the sniffles from his nose, and the slight hiccup in his voice.

"...then I'm coming too..."

"No! You need to stay here!"

He shook his head against my chest.

"... I don't care... I'm not leaving you..."

I sighed softly, nuzzling into his mop of dark hair, inhaling the scent of shampoo, strawberry shampoo I might add.

"...don't be an idiot for once Gold..."

"You're the idiot for running away... thinking it will solve everything. The problems will still be here when you come back..."

_And he was right, but who said I was coming back? _

_What if I liked being in Kanto? I would be away from Cyan, away from the guilt he caused me, and I could start a new life. I knew people over there too, like Blue... she was still in Kanto somewhere and I hadn't seen her for a long time. _

_There were still options._

"...I won't be coming back..."

Gold pulled away forcefully from the embrace to look into my eyes.

His were sparkling in sadness as fresh tears dribbled down his cheeks. He bit his lip, trying not to cry out in agony.

I frowned, not at him but at myself.

_Why was I doing this? I was being so horrible to Gold, but I had to. He would follow me to Kanto... I knew that, unless I made it obvious that I didn't want him around. Maybe I needed to lie to Gold..._

"W-what? B-but... you can't! You can't...l-leave forever! I won't let you... I can't..."

"There is nothing you can do or say that will change my mind..." I remarked coldly, hating myself for it.

Gold's countenance just became a crumpled mess in front of me as he wiped his face on one of his hands.

"...I'm still coming with you..."

"No you're not!"

I watched as he just looked at me and I sighed.

_You have to be cruel to be kind... cruel to be kind..._

"...I don't want you to!" I spat vehemently.

His eyes widened as his lip quivered yet again.

"...w-what? But... I thought you..."

"Thought I what? You thought that I loved you? Just because we fuck occasionally doesn't mean I am the fucking love of your life!"

I hated myself so much for doing this, but I had to, even if it was all bullshit.

_I loved Gold so fucking much! But he needed to think I didn't, he needed to hate me, or dislike me so then he would back off and have a chance to live a normal healthy life. Without me infecting it. _

Once again his face crumbled.

"...but... I love you..."

"I don't care, loving me is just a waste of time because you know that I wont ever love you... no matter how fucking good you might be in bed"

With every horrible word I said I could feel myself dying more and more inside.

_ It was horrible, watching Gold fall to pieces right in front of me, to witness his heart breaking at the seams. It was all my fault...karma was biting my ass so hard right now..._

"...I..." He mumbled, not quite knowing what to say as sorrowful amber eyes looked at the ground.

I bit my tongue, trying to hold back the tears that were beginning to form.

_Keep it together...keep it together..._

"...just leave me alone Gold..."

And with that said I pushed past him, trying to escape this scenario.

I headed towards the Magnet train station, the only transportation that we had to get us to Kanto in the quickest time.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath only to be caught off guard yet again.

Gold had grabbed my wrist, and refused to let go.

"...I know you feel something for me... somewhere down in that cold un-beating heart..."

I looked at the ground, hating yet loving the warmth of his fingers against my skin. I would miss that.

"We were just a sex arrangement Gold, and that was all it was ever going to be..."

"...you're wrong. It might have been that at the beginning... and yeah it probably was for both of us... but not now...now I know that I can't imagine living in a world without you! I don't want to be in a world without you Silver... no matter how bad our lives would get.. or if we were constantly on the run from the police...none of that matters to me..."

I turned to look at the dark haired boy.

His tears had dried on his tanned cheeks, but his eyes were still sparkling and he sniffled every now and then.

I could feel my heart decay inside my chest, pulsating poison through my veins. My throat tightened up, feeling as if I couldn't breathe.

"...stop making this difficult..." I murmured quietly.

"How am I making things difficult? I am offering you an alternative here... stay with me and forget about Cyan... forget about everything...please..."

I hated hearing him beg like that, it just wasn't him.

_Gold was usually a joker, a person who would laugh at nothing and never take anything too serious. Now he was so serious it wasn't him any more. Did I really mean that much to this idiot?_

"...let me go Gold..." I murmured quietly.

He desperately shook his head.

"...no... I won't... I can't let you go..."

I tugged slightly trying to get the dark haired boy to loosen his grip but it failed. He was determined, and I didn't want to fight him off me.

_This was so hard... seeing those eyes... hearing his voice... I just wanted Karma to take me away... I deserved it._

"...how many more times do I have to tell you? I DON'T LOVE YOU!" I literally screamed at him, watching his eyes widen in shock.

_Please... hate me Gold... dislike me... run away... anything... just don't stay here..._

"Silver..."

"Now, if you don't mind I have a train to catch..."

With one swift motion I yanked my arm out of his grasp, watching as his hand fell limply by his sides and his eyes clouded with tears again.

_I was causing this... but I had no choice. I needed to keep Gold safe, and if he was with me he would always be in danger. _

Adjusting my rucksack on my shoulders I turned away from the love of my life and started to walk away.

With every step my heart ached, yearning to be with him, to just turn around and ignore everything.

But I couldn't.

_ For once in my stupid life I was going to make the right decision, I was going to make things right for Gold. Without me infecting his life he would move on and be happy again, Crystal would make sure of that. _

As the wind tousled my hair I heard Gold's voice behind me.

"...I'll wait for you..."

And as the train station came into view I smiled to myself.

_No... he wouldn't wait for me because I wasn't coming back. I would live a whole new life in Kanto, I would arrange for someone to pick up the rest of my stuff from my apartment and find somewhere new to love, hang around with new people, work in a new department store...without Gold. _

I clenched my hand into a fist, feeling a single tear dribble down my face as I walked further away from Gold, further away from the only person I have ever truly loved.

As my eyes diverted to my old department store I saw Cyan behind the counter, serving an old lady... then cold and evil azure eyes burned right into my soul, and a Devil's grin smothered his face.

_Yes... he had won this game right now... he had given me no other choice..._

_I had to do this... for us... for Gold..._

* * *

**Author's Note: :'(... tissues much? Poor Gold and Silver! What will happen to them and will Silver ever come back from Kanto? Find out in the next instalment. Please read and review! :) It would make a little girl very happy face ^^**


	12. As you go

**Author's Note: Hello everyone! Ah, another slightly quick update! Last chapter was so incredibly sad! D: Even I got sad T_T but this one might be a little better :) enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter Twelve: As you go**

It was now I realised why I hated trains so much.

_Being stuck on a platform for seemingly hours, and crushed up against people who obviously didn't own a bath or shower, or literally poured cologne over themselves. It was my idea of hell. But still, there was no turning back now._

The Magnet train would be arriving soon, approximately ten minutes according to the overhead digital sign.

Sighing to myself I moved to sit down on a bench, removing my rucksack from my aching shoulders.

So this was it, I was going to Kanto to start a new life, to forget about everything, to erase Gold from my life and to try to move on.

_Yeah, like that would happen. _

_It wasn't like I could just delete him like a file on a computer, it wasn't like I could right click on my recycle bin and remove him from my mind forever. Things just were not that simple. _

Feeling a slight ache in my heart, and wanting to talk to something I pulled out a Pokeball from my pocket.

I released my Sneasel, who just looked up at me expectantly, usually she only came out when there were battles to be won, not just for my own selfish needs. But right now I just wanted some-one to talk to, some-one to cuddle and to not feel like I was drowning in my own self inflicted misery.

I smiled at her awkwardly, watching as she clambered up on the seat beside me, large eyes looking directly at me, it was as if she wanted to know why I was hurting.

_ Could she feel it?_

"...am I doing the right thing? If I leave Gold alone... will it be the right thing to do?" I asked her in a quiet voice, sighing under my breath.

She frowned and gently nuzzled against my arm.

At least I still had my Pokemon in my life, but somewhere deep inside my iced over heart Gold had sparked a fire that was slowly melting it all away. But now he would be gone, so that ice would take over once again.

I placed my head in my hands, feeling my throat burn as tears stung my eyes once again.

_ No, I didn't want to cry any more... I was done feeling so shit about this, I didn't want to feel this pain any more. _

I felt Sneasel's claw gently rub my arm in comfort, and for that moment I was glad she was here.

Sneasel's personality was usually as cold as my own, probably because she had always witnessed me being horrible to others so she used to do it herself, but now she was showing a sensitive side no-one else ever saw. It was a rare occurrence, but maybe, just like myself she was mellowing too.

But luckily for her she had never felt love, or had any experience in the matter so right now she had no idea how I was feeling.

I glanced up at the digital sign that hung on the wall, indicating when the train would arrive and all the stops along the journey before it would reach it's main destination of Saffron City in Kanto.

Combing my fingers through my hair I wondered what it would be like in Kanto, to work there with new people, to be around others who had different accent's and to experience a different climate.

Johto was usually warmer in Summer than Kanto, so I wasn't sure if that was a good thing or a bad thing. My skin never reacted well with sunlight or heat, but then again I despised the cold too.

_Guess my body was just weird._

"Snee!" Sneasel called out, pointing through the crowd, seemingly excited for some reason.

I glanced at the direction she was pointing to only to feel my heart die a little inside.

A mass of dark hair wondered past the coffee stand, heading towards me.

_ Was it him? Was it... Gold? _

I wanted to stand up, to get a better view, but why bother?

If Gold had followed me then I would just have to tell him again to leave me alone. It wasn't like this arrangement could work after all.

_Still, I would be lying if seeing that mass of dark hair didn't cause my heart to swell in my chest._

As my eyes followed the one who owned the black hair I wanted him to come closer so I could find out for definite if it was Gold, or just some-one who had a similar haircut.

But no such luck it seemed.

_"The next train approaching is the 8:30 Magnet Train service to Saffron City"_ I heard the blaring mechanical voice over erupt in my ear canal and I winced.

Ten minutes had gone by so fast! But still, I had to get on this train and quickly if I wanted to sit down for the journey.

Slowly I grabbed my rucksack and placed it on my back, still aimlessly looking around for the dark haired stranger.

It seemed he had given up the ghost and left.

I frowned, feeling Sneasel clamber onto my rucksack.

_What if that was Gold? Did he want to find me to stop me? Or did he just give up? _

Sighing to myself I watched as the train pulled into the station, coming to an abrupt halt.

As the large doors swung open I was almost trampled on by the stampede of people trying to get on board. It was like being attacked by a herd of angry Tauros.

Helplessly Sneasel clung to my rucksack with her claws to avoid being swept away in the crowd as I managed to get on board the train.

* * *

To my dismay most of the seats were already taken, and immediately I cursed under my breath.

Standing the whole way wasn't something I had in mind.

Re-adjusting the straps of my rucksack on my back I walked down the train, trying to find a seat, but most of them were taken.

Some of them weren't even filled by people, some were filled by shopping bags, or just overly large people who had to take up two seats.

I combed my fingers through my hair, trying to suppress a groan that threatened to escape my lips.

_Why did I want to do this again?_

"Sneasel!" She called out, once again pointing a little further down the train.

I followed her direction, wondering what had caught her interest, but soon enough I discovered the reason.

There was a seat next to a young male, who was reading a newspaper.

_Thank God Sneasel was so observant._

Silently thanking the ice type Pokemon I shuffled into the seat and removed my rucksack, now inhaling the scent of very strong cologne.

It must have been radiating off the guy sitting beside me. But still, it wasn't a horrible smell, just strong, like he literally bathed in it.

I rested my head back against the seat, pulling Sneasel into my lap as the train started it's long journey to the Kanto region.

My eyes slowly flickered across to the guy sitting beside me.

I noticed long spiked brown hair erupting from the newspaper that he was reading, and the fact he wore a high collared black shirt.

Deep inside I had a feeling I recognised this boy, but I wasn't sure where from.

Instead of wanting to start off a conversation I just relaxed in my seat, holding Sneasel comfortably in my arms and feeling the soft movements of the train.

"...wow...a tournament in Goldenrod City, and the main guest is Champion Red?! This is quite the read..." The guy mused quietly as he turned the page of his newspaper.

It was now I noticed the thick accent that laced his voice. He was most definitely from Kanto, like Red, only Red's accent was softer and less noticeable.

"...it's weird if you talk to yourself, you know?" I mocked, hearing Sneasel giggle.

The guy with the wild spiked hair pulled the newspaper down to look at me.

It was now I noticed narrow emerald green eyes staring at me with annoyance, and now the gears of my mind started to piece together just who this was.

But, it seemed he knew who I was too.

"Silver? You are Silver... right?"

I blinked, almost falling off my seat.

_Was I that memorable? Then again with this hair colour was it that surprising? _

_Now, I know I only have eyes for Gold, but still... this guy was so beautiful it was just unreal. Like most girls would be jealous of how beautiful he was._

He had perfectly shaped emerald green eyes that just seemed to melt your soul every time he looked at you, absolutely flawless skin with no blemishes or spots, or any other imperfections, and hair that should have been used in a hairspray commercial or something.

It took me a while to even say anything.

"...y-yeah? I am, and what of it?"

The emerald eyed boy raised an eyebrow at me, and then back to the newspaper he was reading.

"Did you know your ugly mug is in the newspaper?"

I felt my eyes widen as the realisation hit me.

_Of course! Violet took that photograph of me and Gold yesterday, and she did say we would be in the newspaper. _

Hastily I snatched it out his hands, as Sneasel moved slightly so the paper wouldn't smack her in the face.

And he was right.

The photograph stared back at me, of Gold having his arm around me smiling that stupid smile, and me being my usual grumpy self.

"Hey! What the hell?! You can't just go around snatching other people's property!" He growled, trying to snatch the newspaper back, but right now I wouldn't let him.

I wanted to read about what Violet had written.

_'Trainers Gold and Silver, who intervened when unruly bystander tried to assault our reporter'_ that was the caption underneath the photograph, and I would be telling a lie if I didn't feel my ego swell right now.

But I also felt sad.

Seeing Gold's face in the newspaper was making me miss him already, even though I was the one who literally watched him break in front of me.

_I didn't deserve to miss him. _

I sighed, swiftly pushing the crumpled paper back into the emerald eyed boy's face.

"...stupid Gold..." I mumbled to myself, pulling Sneasel back into my lap as I nuzzled the top of her head.

"...Gold... Gold... ah yes! The guy who challenged Red on Mt Silver?"

_Is that what he would always be known for? For challenging the magnificent Red? Red wasn't even that great, and his personality was so boring I would have preferred talking to a brick wall. I might have got more conversation out of it. _

I sighed.

"...I wish everyone would stop talking about that guy... he's not even that great... he's the most uninteresting person I have ever met..."

"HEY! Don't talk about Red like that!" The boy growled in defence, now deciding to read the remaining pages of the newspaper.

_ Oh great, another one of Red's many fans, just what I needed. But still, this guy seemed vaguely familiar._

"I have to work with him!" I defended, watching as emerald eyes burrowed deep into my soul.

The boy shook his head.

"...and I have known him almost all his life... so shut the fuck up before I make you myself"

His voice was threatening, and now I was sure this guy wasn't just some follower, or a fan. He must be a friend or something, maybe even a relative.

Sneasel relaxed in my arms so I assumed she had drifted off to sleep.

"And who the hell are you anyway?"

The boy closed the newspaper loudly, placing it down on his lap.

His eyes were closed momentarily before he looked at me again.

"I am Green... the only person who can seem to smack any sense into Red"

Now it made sense.

_Red did speak of Green, claiming that it was him that suggested getting a job and to stop hiding away on Mt Silver. In my opinion he should have stayed there._

"...so why are you going back to Kanto if you live there?" I questioned, not even knowing why.

_ Why the hell did I even care? _

Green smiled, allowing his whole face to lighten up like he was the only light source in the room.

"I went to see him before the tournament... to offer some support and to see how he was getting on at his new job..."

_So was Green his best friend or something? I mean I had a best friend once, and nowadays I didn't even know if she was still alive. I guess I was just that sort of person. Maybe Green liked to make sure his friends were alive and well, unlike me..._

I slowly patted Sneasel's head as I spoke.

"...so are you like the supportive best friend that would do anything for him?"

Green chuckled.

_Okay, maybe I was wrong?_

"...something like that I suppose..."

"So I repeat, why are you going back to Kanto when you can just stay with Red for a while?"

I watched Green's expression.

He seemed a little disheartened about what I just said, and I had no idea why. It was quite simple to just decide to stay there for a while, not like anyone had anything important to do nowadays.

He sighed and looked up at the ceiling.

"... I have my own job to do, things just aren't that simple."

"Try being in my shoes, then you will know what it feels like for things not to be simple..." I groaned, feeling a wave of sadness wash over me.

_ I really missed Gold. I missed kissing his soft lips, feeling his arms around me, and hearing his stupid laugh. That was just something I needed to get used to._

"So, why are you going to Kanto?" Green asked me.

I sighed, not really wanting to tell him the whole version of events.

_ I guess I could just simplify everything, couldn't I?_

Suddenly before I had a chance to even open my mouth a terrible ringtone emitted from Green's Pokegear.

_Saved by the bell... or in this case by the phone._

Green sighed.

"Excuse me while I take this call..."

I shrugged, holding Sneasel comfortably in my arms, feeling the soft rise and fall of her chest as she slept.

Green swiftly answered the device, his face expressing annoyance.

"Hello?"

There was a pause.

"...ah hello! What...? He hasn't turned up? Well... wait half an hour, after all he isn't due into work until 9:30. Yes, yes I know..."

I wondered who he was talking about, and more importantly who he was talking to.

_ Maybe a girlfriend or something, or a work colleague. Did Green even have a job? Well, he did mention something along the lines of that..._

I watched him as he sighed, like he was being dictated to.

"...alright I will go through the health and safety procedures and show him around the place. I swear you worry too much Blue..."

My eyes widened as that last word escaped his lips.

_ Did I hear that right?! Blue?! He was talking to my old best friend Blue? No way... _

A part of me wanted to talk to her, to hear her voice again, but another part didn't want to.

Maybe because I was worried she would totally flip out on me for basically ignoring her for almost two years.

"...yes, I know. I have some stuff to do beforehand though so I might come in around lunch time..."

The conversation continued while I listened in, hating myself for being so nosey.

But I had to.

_ He was talking to Blue, so that meant they knew each other. _

Another thought hit me.

_SHIT! What if Blue was Green's girlfriend?! Oh hell no! That... just...no! Blue had better standards, didn't she? _

I looked at the floor, feeling the steady movement of the train.

"...alright see you later. Bye"

And with that said he hung up.

I watched as he sighed and leaned back in his seat, eyes flickering up to the ceiling.

"Trouble?" I enquired curiously, wanting to know more about this, _like how the hell did he know my Blue? Well... she wasn't mine... but you know what I mean!_

"...not really, just a complication, nothing I can't handle"

I frowned, wondering if Green noticed.

_How dare he call Blue a complication! _

Chewing my lip I responded.

"... I never realised you knew Blue"

Green's eyes wondered to my face, and slowly I watched a smirk creep upon those perfect features.

_I was so fucking jealous right now._

"Of course I know Blue! We have been friend's for years!"

At that point I felt a part of me die inside.

_ Blue had replaced me with him? Green was nowhere near as good as me! Well, okay he might be better looking and have a lot of charm, but he wouldn't stick up for her and protect her like I would. _

Subconsciously I cuddled Sneasel closer, wanting to have some form of comfort right now.

"...oh..." I murmured.

"...do you know Blue too? Or do you two have some kind of history?"

I turned to face him, and watched as he wiggled his eyebrows at me.

My mouth gaped open in shock.

_WHAT?! Me and Blue?! No fucking way!_

"W-what?! NO! NEVER!"

"Alright, chill out! It was only a thought, I never actually said you did... " Green said in defence, holding his hands up, still wearing that stupid smirk on his face.

A growl erupted from my throat as I shuffled in my seat to turn away from the boy with the wild hair.

"...Blue was like my sister you moron..."

"Was...? Why isn't she now?" Green enquired, and to be honest I didn't want to tell him my fucking life story.

"...does it matter?" I shot back, glaring at the emerald eyed boy.

He just shrugged , resting his arms behind his head.

"Not really, can't say I am that interested in your social life, or rather lack of it..."

At that moment I seriously wanted to punch him, but I just didn't have the energy.

_ So what if Green and Blue were more than friends, why should I interfere? It was none of my business. Maybe I was just feeling down about leaving Gold. I missed him so much... _

Sighing to myself I rested my chin on Sneasel's head.

"...seems to me like you have problems yourself..." Green commented quietly, his voice sounding like he actually cared.

_Maybe he was just toying with me, yeah that was the most likely explanation._

"...so what if I do, it has nothing to do with you..."

"Well...whatever... but it must be something bad if you are running away to Kanto"

I closed my eyes momentarily before cursing under my breath.

"I am not running away!"

I heard Green chuckle, which made me turn to face him.

_Did he even care about anything?_

"...whatever helps you sleep at night..."

I really wanted this train journey to end now just so I could go to work, sort out my living arrangements and expenses, and move on with my life.

I didn't need this shit right now.

_Now I wanted to take back what I said about Red. At least Red didn't talk much._

"Are you staying permanently there?" Green continued to bombard me with questions, like he was interrogating me for a crime I didn't commit.

I gritted my teeth, starting to get annoyed.

"...so what if I am?"

"Well... do you even know where you are staying?"

No I didn't, but I could sort that out when I needed to.

_ For a couple of night's I could just bunk at the Pokemon Centre. It was no big deal. And besides... why the fuck was Green concerned about where I was staying? _

I shook my head to his question, and watched as he sighed in disappointment.

"...what is it about you teenagers who never think about the more important things?"

"Shut the hell up Green...I didn't ask for your opinion" I shot back angrily, watching the older boy back away.

At least he had sense.

His eyes narrowed at me before he sighed yet again.

"Believe it or not I am trying to help you...but obviously you are too bullheaded to even see that."

_Bull headed? What did that even mean? And I didn't need his help! I could survive on my own, I always did before so what changed now?_

Scowling I replied;

"I am fine by myself..."

"Who are you trying to lie to? Me... or yourself?"

His voice softened, allowing that Kanto accent to dance off his tongue.

Luckily for me I understood him quite well, _maybe that was because I had been around Red..._

"...I am fine!" I repeated, louder this time.

Green rolled his eyes and started to gaze out of the window.

"Alright then, don't say I didn't offer."

"I wont..."

Grunting to myself I felt Sneasel shuffle in my lap.

She was waking up from her power nap.

"Sneee~" She cooed softly, stretching out her clawed limbs, causing Green to watch her intently.

_Had he never seen a Sneasel before?_

"...are you only horrible to people?" He asked quietly, watching the ice type as she happily nuzzled against me.

I furrowed my brow in annoyance.

_I wasn't horrible! Well... I could be... but I didn't like people interfering in my life. Lately that was all that kept happening._

"...some people..." I replied.

Green smiled softly.

"You know if you just stop being so quick to temper and relax a little... you might find that more people would like you"

I snorted at his remark as I gently patted Sneasel's head.

_ I didn't want people to like me. The only person who I cared about was now gone, and I had broken his heart so willingly. I was truly a bad person._

"..I don't care..."

"...and you never know, you might even grow to love some-one..."

He chuckled after his words, causing me to glare at him.

_He didn't even know the first thing about me, or how I felt! Yes, I knew what love felt like! I hated it! All it managed to do was make me feel like shit, go weak at the knees and cause my personality to alter completely. Love wasn't something I liked right now._

"...and I bet some-one like you has never been in love either..." I mumbled.

I heard Green sigh, and it was deep and meaningful.

_Was he in love with Blue? Oh tell me he wasn't... please!_

"Actually... I have believe it or not..." Green mused softly, emerald eyes gazing into mine before looking away.

His voice sounded pained and it made me wonder if he felt what I did?

_If he felt the Butterfrees in his stomach whenever he saw them, if he felt like fainting every time he heard their voice, and if his heart melted every time he kissed them. Okay... I was getting sad now. _

I frowned, nuzzling Sneasel softly.

_Man... I missed Gold so much!_

"...is it Blue?" I managed to say, before hearing the brunette erupt into laughter.

_What the hell was so funny? Blue wasn't ugly! In fact Green should have been proud to have her as a girlfriend... that was of course is she was his girlfriend._

"Blue?! What in the world made you say that?" He asked, still chuckling at what I said.

Frowning to myself I shrugged.

"...it was just a thought..."

"Well you thought wrong..."

I honestly couldn't tell you how grateful I was to hear that news.

_ Blue was not Green's girlfriend. Thank God for that. Then who the hell could it be? Well... if I looked like Green maybe I would have lots of people swooning after me, I mean he was in another league completely compared to me._

I was so plain, and so uninteresting in comparison.

"Then who?" I asked, not realising how rude it sounded until Green raised an eyebrow at me.

"Nosey aren't we?"

"...actually don't tell me... I don't care anyway..." I mumbled to myself.

_Why should I even care in the first place? _

I heard Green sigh.

"Why do you always do that?"

"Do what?"

"Deny it afterwards when some-one basically tells you to butt out of their business?"

_Did I really do that? It was just force of habit really, or self preservation whichever you prefer._

Huffing to myself I cuddled Sneasel, hearing her mewl quietly.

_Maybe I hugged her too tight?_

"...it's just who I am... deal with it..."

Green rolled his emerald eyes but smiled nonetheless.

He didn't say anything, or make any horrible comments for a while.

We just sat in comfortable silence.

That was until once again the annoying ringtone of Green's Pokegear blared loudly.

I sighed.

_Why couldn't he have a better ringtone?_

"Sorry..." He mumbled as he answered.

"Hello?"

Once again there was a pause, and a part of me wondered if it was Blue yet again.

_She was the sort of person to badger you for information until she got what she wanted, but still... maybe she had changed?_

"...Red?!" Green's voice raised in pitch and instantly I turned to face him, wanting to listen to the conversation.

I watched as his face expressed anxiety, like something was troubling him.

_Had something happened?_

"...why are you calling me? I thought we said we couldn't call each other during work hours?"

Slowly I raised an eyebrow.

_ This all seemed a little too secretive for my liking. Why was it so bad to call someone when you were at work? Green wasn't even at work!_

"...oh I see..."

Green's eyes flickered across to me for a moment.

"...yes... he is right here..."

_Were they talking about me?_

"...some-one to speak to him? May I ask who it is?"

My eyes widened.

_So Red was calling on someone's behalf? And who the hell would want to talk to me? Unless..._

"I see... yes okay..."

Green handed me his Pokegear and I just held it in confusion.

He smiled awkwardly at me.

"...someone wants to talk to you..."

He shrugged and just relaxed in his seat.

_I sighed, hoping to God it wasn't who I thought it was... _

Clearing my throat I managed to allow some words to escape my lips.

"Hello...?"

"...Silver?!"

The voice sounded desperate and immediately my heart started to sink.

_No...it couldn't be..._

"...G-Gold...?" I mumbled, hearing my voice stutter.

_No... why? Why was he doing this? I needed to get away, I wanted him to move on and live a normal life. Calling me via Red was not the answer. _

Green's eyes burned into me as the conversation continued.

"...Oh my God! Silver! I am so glad you answered! I didn't know what else to do..."

His voice sounded broken, like he had been crying.

I swallowed hard, feeling Sneasel move in my lap in concern.

"...why are you calling me? I told you to forget about me..."

"...I can't! I can't just ignore you Silver...and I didn't know who else to help me call you..."

I sighed softly, smiling awkwardly at my ice type, who looked at me with a worried expression.

There was nothing to worry about, I was fine.

"...Gold..." I mumbled, combing my fingers through my hair.

"...please... come home...don't go to Kanto..." He literally begged me, and I winced at hearing his voice.

I hated hearing him beg like that, it just wasn't like Gold. Gold usually would bluff his way through life, not caring about anything.

Not right now however.

"...you know I have to do this..."

There was a pause.

"You don't! You can come home... and we can sort this out... we always do!"

I looked at Green momentarily, feeling sympathy radiate off him.

I didn't want his condolences.

"Not any more..."

_ I hated this! So fucking much! Fucking Cyan... and his fucking suicidal brother... and his fucking psychopath ways! Why did he have to ruin the best thing to ever happen in my life?_

Gold took a deep breath, as if he was trying to stop himself from breaking down.

"...but what about my birthday? You said... you would be there..."

And at that moment I felt my heart literally split in two.

Tears stung my eyes as Sneasel worriedly nuzzled my face, letting me know she was here for me.

But it wasn't enough.

_ He wanted me there... at his birthday party... me...the one person who would probably ruin it. _

I placed a hand to my head, trying to fight off the tears that threatened to fall from my eyes.

"...I'm sorry..." I mumbled pathetically.

"I love you Silver..."

And I knew he meant it.

_I knew he loved me every time we kissed, every time he smiled at me, and every time we had sex. There was meaning behind the actions. _

I bit my lip, suddenly feeling a hand on my shoulder.

It was Green.

_Maybe he knew I was struggling to keep it all together?_

"...stop saying that..." I muttered, not wanting to hear him say that any more. It was too painful. He needed to try to move on and forget about what we had.

And I had to do the same.

"...but it's the truth!" Gold cried out desperately.

"...and please don't call me again..."

I took a deep breath, feeling a single tear escape my eyes before quickly wiping it away.

_ No, I wouldn't cry. Not on a train with hundreds of people, and not in front of Green. _

There was an uncomfortable pause.

"...is that what you want...?"

I nodded weakly, realising that I needed to voice my actions.

"Y-yes...it is..."

"...I won't give up on you Silver... I won't!"

He sounded determined, and I hated that part of his personality.

Gold would never know when to quit, when he had lost the match. He would always keep pursuing his ideals without a care in the world, only this time he would have to let go.

He had no choice and neither did I.

"...you have to..."

"I won't! Not when I know you love me too!"

I paused, trying to think of something to say without my voice dying on me.

_Yes... I did love him, more than anything in the entire world. I realised that, and when I did Cyan shattered it to pieces. There was no way back from this, not unless Cyan was out of the picture for good. But even so the idea of killing him off didn't seem too appealing._

"...it's not enough..."

Green's hand gently rubbed my tense shoulder as Sneasel looked up at me with large eyes.

I smiled at her, trying to ease her thoughts.

She was another one who cared about me too much.

Gold took another deep breath.

"...I will never let you go..."

I couldn't take it any more, slowly I was falling apart and I needed to stop it.

_The only way to end this whole situation was to hang up on Gold, but then.. he would feel even worse. I didn't want to crush him completely, but what other choice did I have?_

"I have to go now..." I mumbled, hoping Gold just dropped the subject.

But I knew he wouldn't.

"NO! Silver... please don't hang up on me..."

Closing my eyes I inhaled deeply before hanging up, hearing Gold's voice fade from my memory.

_That was it now, it was over. _

I slowly handed Green back his Pokegear as Sneasel snuggled against me sadly, hoping to cheer me up somehow.

_ Maybe she felt my pain? _

My breaths were shaky every time I inhaled.

I couldn't believe I managed to hang up on him, on the one person who I loved more than life itself.

Green frowned as he shoved the item into his pocket.

"...I'm not going to even bother asking you what happened..."

At least he knew when to butt out of my business, and besides I doubted the likeliness of being able to talk to anyone about this without breaking down.

_ Lately it was so hard to just breathe without wanting to collapse on the ground in a heap. Gold had been my constant support, and now I was walking away from him on my own. It was daunting._

"...if he calls again...please...tell him to leave me alone.." I asked Green, watching the older boy nod sadly.

_Did he know what was going no between Gold and I? I hoped not. The last thing I wanted was to be teased about being gay._

But he didn't.

It was like he understood.

"Alright..."

I sighed, placing a hand to my head in annoyance.

Now I couldn't erase Gold's voice from my mind. It was haunting me, causing my heart to melt away.

A part of me wished I never fell in love with him then all this would be so much easier to deal with.

"...but sometimes if you talk about your problems you can work things out..." Green consoled, removing his hand from my shoulder.

I shrugged, knowing that it was not possible.

We had talked enough, and the only way to ensure Gold's safety was to make sure he stayed as far away from me as possible.

"...you don't understand..."

"Try me..." Green challenged, folding his arms.

_Great... just what I needed. I didn't need Green trying to prove he felt what I did. I didn't care, all I wanted was to forget about all of this, to attempt to move on with my shitty life._

"...just drop it..."

I heard Green sigh in annoyance.

"You can't just walk away from the people you love Silver...because you will just end up resenting yourself for it..."

I glared at the emerald eyed boy.

_He had no fucking idea how I felt! He had no fucking idea why I was walking away!_

"Shut up! You have no fucking idea what I am going through!"

I never meant to shout at him, guess I just couldn't deal with this shit any more.

Green was only trying to show me the error of my ways, but right now this was the only option I had.

"...maybe I don't, but I do know how hard it is to walk away from the person you love. I have to do it time and time again... and it's horrible not knowing when I am going to see them again...I just don't want you to go through what I do, day in day out..."

I glanced at Green, feeling Sneasel shuffle in my lap to get comfortable.

_So Green loved someone and he had to walk away from them all the time? How was that even possible? Why did he keep going back to them if he knew he had to leave? Wait a minute... _

My eyes widened as realisation hit me.

I believed I knew who the person was who Green loved.

"...tell me you don't love _'him'_..." I murmured, hoping to God it wasn't Red.

_Fucking hell I would have preferred sticking my head in a gas oven than be around him. Did Red even know how to feel emotions?!_

I watched the emerald eyed boy frown, and look at the floor.

"You can't help who you fall in love with Silver, you should know that better than anyone..."

And I did.

_ I never wanted to fall in love with Gold. If I had my way it would have never happened, but it did. And now I couldn't turn back time to prevent this whole stupid mess from happening. I just had to deal with it somehow, to try to keep everything together and not to fall apart._

"...yeah..." I mumbled, wondering how long it would be until we reached Saffron City.

After all I did need to start my shift at the store soon.

"...all I am saying is don't throw it all away over nothing. Just think about what you are doing, and if it is really worth all the pain and suffering."

Green was right, as usual.

_ But it wasn't worth all the pain. I hated feeling like this._

"...I have to do this..."

"Well... if that is the case then change some aspects of your life... for example change your haircut, or get a tattoo, or do something irrational..."

I raised an eyebrow at Green.

_Was he trying to be a bad influence on me? And what about a haircut? There was nothing wrong with my hair! I liked it long... but still... I guess I did partly understand where he was coming from. _

If I changed things about myself then maybe I would feel differently, and it would be easier to move on with my life.

"...I think it should be you considering a haircut.." I shot back sarcastically, hearing Green chuckle.

"My hair is styled this way thank you very much!"

I shrugged, but smiled weakly nonetheless.

"...just think about what I have said, it might make you feel differently about things..."

And as I looked down at Sneasel she nodded.

Maybe he was right after all.

_To start a new life I needed to change things, even mundane things like how often I changed my socks, or what I ate for breakfast. Small changes might help me in the long run. _

And as the voice over announced the train would soon be pulling into Saffron City deep inside I was grateful for Green being patient with me and talking me round.

Usually only Gold was able to get through to me, but this time Red's long lost soul mate managed to do it.

_Oh my God... weird as hell. Red and Green? Together? I can't even imagine it. _

My eyes glanced to the window watching the skyline of the city come into view and deep inside I realised that it was now or never.

My new life was about to begin, and I needed to be prepared for whatever came my way.

* * *

**Author's Note: YAY! Green! :) I like his character already ^^ and awwww poor Silver! Will he see the error of his ways and go back to Johto? Read and review please! Lemme know what you think! :D**


	13. Cyan white lies

**Authors Note: Hello everyone! I am back! :) Man... last few chapters have been quite upsetting, so this one should make you all feel a little better :) enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter Thirteen: Cyan white lies**

Saffron City was ten times the size of Goldenrod, and a hundred times more busier. It was hard to understand everyone who bustled past me in a hurry due to their accents, but still I wasn't here for any other reason but to do my job, and to save Gold from Cyan's antics.

_Still, a thought continued to resurface... what if Cyan wanted me out of the picture to abuse Gold in some way? He would definitely do something like that, especially if his brother died in the process. _

Sneasel had been returned to her Pokeball because she always hated crowded places. Seemed we were more alike than I ever thought.

I rubbed my hand across my forehead as a deep sigh escaped my lips.

Then I felt a hand on my shoulder, instantly waking me into life.

It was Green.

He smiled at me, even if it did come across as faked,_ maybe it wasn't, maybe it was just me._

"I guess you aren't too familiar with Kanto, am I right?"

My eyes met his briefly before I gazed at the ground once again.

This town was far too noisy for my liking.

Weakly I shrugged. I could find my own way around this region, I wasn't handicapped or incapable of looking after myself. Green did not need to look after me.

"I'll be fine..." I mumbled, shrugging his hand off my shoulder as my eyes glanced at the scenery before me.

There were thousands of people around, all bustling about their busy lives, either going to work, training Pokemon or merely window shopping. Luckily for me I didn't work in this town.

_I would easily get lost. But I could deal with it._

"...I have to go to Celadon anyway! Come on Silv, let me at least walk with you..."

My eyes widened as my pet name so willingly escaped into the open air.

_Silv... Gold called me that..._

_"Oh come on Silv! I'm only pulling your leg!"_

I frowned, hating how that one simple pet name caused my heart to literally die inside my chest.

_Even though I hated people calling me that... right now I missed it. What I wouldn't give right now to just feel his arms around me..._

"Silver?" Green asked, his voice laced with concern as he bent down slightly to look at my face.

My silence must have been a little unsettling.

Instead of telling the truth I just shrugged it off, just like every other care in the world.

"Well come on then! I don't want to be late for work because of you!" I spat at the taller and older boy, suddenly deciding to walk in any direction, not even sure of if it was the correct way.

And as I thought it wasn't.

Green's hand held my wrist to spin my body around so I was facing the opposite direction.

"...at least storm off in the right direction, dipshit..." Green cursed playfully.

I huffed and walked away, not caring if he followed me, or if he left me to rot in this hell hole.

I never would have thought I would miss Goldenrod and my dingy apartment, but right now I would have given up anything just to go back there, to my safety net.

_Here I was out of my comfort zone and I hated it._

* * *

My feet ached, and even though I was told Kanto was colder than Johto in summer, right now I was doubting that.

My hair was sticking to my neck in coils as sweat congealed all over my body.

_I hated heat, and hated being hot. It just didn't agree with me. _

But still, maybe it was because I was walking in it for a long period of time.

Green had followed me, and I didn't know why.

_Yes, I know he said he had business in Celadon but still, couldn't he have just left me alone? Right now I didn't want anyone around to keep reminding me of how sorry my life was._

"...so are you going to be working in Celadon department store?" Green asked, trying to start up some sort of conversation between us.

Obviously it wasn't going to work.

I sighed, stuffing my sweaty hands in my pockets as I tried to ignore the overpowering heat on the back of my neck.

"What is it to you?" I commented coldly.

Green shrugged, seemingly enjoying the warmth.

"...just curious. And is this for permanent, or a temporary arrangement?"

"How the fuck should I know?!" I growled at the emerald eyed boy, watching as he held his hands up in defence.

_God, how did Red put up with this guy?_

"...well it seems pretty stupid to just come to another region and assume it was permanent... considering by the sounds of the phone conversation you have literally destroyed all ties back in Johto..."

I stopped walking and clenched my hands into fists.

_He had no right to listen in on my conversation with Gold! It was my business, and my business alone! _

And as far as I was concerned this was permanent.

_Cyan wouldn't get me transferred for a day or two, would he? No, he would want to make me suffer and force me to live in a foreign region, with no friends, and no Gold to fall back on._

"Shut the fuck up..." I grumbled, trying so hard not to flip out.

Even though Green was older and a lot taller than me it didn't give him the right to lecture me about my life.

_Yes, I knew I messed up... I didn't want to hear some-one telling me over and over again, reminding me of what I did, and knowing I could never make things right. _

Green frowned.

"...there's no need to swear Silver..."

"And there's no need to butt your nose into other people's business!" I growled threateningly, now starting to walk again.

I couldn't stand this heat for much longer. My skin was probably going to be red raw by now, and would peel very soon if I didn't get some shade.

I heard Green sigh in discontentment.

"Fine...jeez... sometimes I wonder how Red managed to put up with you..."

I didn't care.

_Red was the most uninteresting person in the entire world, why would it matter what he thought of me? We were just civil to each other because we had to work together, that was it._

"...you should be asking me that question..." I mumbled, half heartedly, knowing that it would probably wind the brunette up. That he might even lash out at me, or curse at me, show his true colours.

_ I had heard rumours about his temper after all, and besides... if things did get nasty I could easily defend myself._

But, sadly he did not rise to it.

"Red is a good person, so he might not talk much to everyone, or joke around all the time... but that is just who he is. It wouldn't be Red if he wasn't like that..."

I glanced across at Green, he had a small smile on his face.

He must have been reminiscing about Red, and their times together, not that I cared.

_ Deep inside I couldn't imagine Red being gay, or straight for that matter. He seemed too asexual for anything._

I kicked a stone across the footpath in annoyance as I secretly wanted a full on blazing row just to get all this hurt out of my system.

"...whatever..."

We walked the rest of the way in silence, mainly because of my attitude, and the fact if I did say anything I would probably make Green's life a misery.

It wasn't that he didn't deserve it, I just wasn't in the mood for talking any more.

_ A part of me just wanted to forget about Cyan, forget about the fact I would be working in Celadon department store for the foreseeable future... and to forget about how much my heart craved for Gold._

As Green and I trundled through Celadon City the atmosphere felt a lot more calmer than it did in Saffron.

Everyone seemed happier, all going about doing their own things and not one of them bothered me.

That was a good thing.

I had half assumed that by Green following me around then we would also attract the attention of girls, but luckily that had not happened.

"So... you and this Gold dude... are you two a couple or something?" Green enquired at last, looking at me through emerald eyes.

_ Great... I had hoped the subject of Gold would have evaded me, but no such luck. Trust Green to be the inquisitive type._

"...does it really look like it?" I answered coldly.

Green shrugged.

"I don't know, that's why I asked. It just seems like... your mind is somewhere else.."

I rolled my eyes.

_I didn't need this right now, why couldn't Green just leave me alone? I was more than capable of making it to the department store in one piece._

"It's none of your business...why can't you find someone else to bother?"

I watched the older boy frown.

"...it's called caring, you should learn how to do it sometime..."

_ Yeah right! Green and caring? More like annoying and nosey! This was none of his business, and yet he continued to pester me. I didn't need this._

* * *

As we both walked past the Pokemon Centre towards the department store I found my body freeze to the spot.

My limbs refused to work, it was as if I was paralysed.

My eyes widened as my heart slowed to a standstill.

Before me was the same black hair that I saw back on the train platform in Goldenrod.

_ Slowly I blinked, wondering if it was Gold. But, why would Gold follow me out here? A more likely candidate would be Cyan... please let it not be him..._

Green paused beside me, looking from my frozen body to the person standing in front of us, face hidden from view.

"...do you know him?" He asked, indicating with his thumb to the mass of dark hair.

I tried to say something, anything... but the words wouldn't come out.

I just could picture the boy turning around and seeing Gold's stupid smile, and then I would attack him with hugs and kisses for eternity.

The boy shifted, pulling something out of his pocket, it seemed like a phone of some sort, only it didn't look like a phone.

I continued to watch him, hearing Green's voice haunt my ears.

"Well, are you just going to stand here like some stalker, or are you going to talk to him?"

_That was true, maybe if I spoke to him I could finally discover who this person was? And it could be Gold, there was always that small possibility. _

Slowly the feeling in my limbs returned with a vengeance, causing me to stumble forwards a little.

Taking a deep breath, knowing Green's eyes were burning into my very soul I decided that what harm could it do?

_So what if this guy wasn't Gold? _

Nervously I outstretched my hand, watching as it hovered over the boy's shoulder, not daring to touch him just yet. Closing my eyes momentarily I decided it was now or never.

"G-Gold...?" I mumbled, placing my hand on the boy's shoulder.

Immediately the mass of black hair turned to face towards me, and I was met by a horrified expression.

The sound of something being dropped on the floor rung in my ears.

"G-get the hell off me!"

I moved my hand away instantly, feeling my heart decay inside my chest.

_ It wasn't Gold, he didn't even look anything like Gold. In fact he looked more like Red than Gold. _

My eyes trailed to the floor, hearing Green's footsteps approach me from behind.

"Well, well what a surprise! I never expected to see you in town Ruby!" Green chuckled, and I watched as the dark haired boy's face turned into a wild smile.

_Did these two know each other? Oh great... _

I bowed my head so I couldn't see this _'bromance'_ blossom.

_ Now... I was really missing Gold..._

"Oh my God! Long time no see Green!" The boy named Ruby called out, smacking fists with the emerald eyed boy.

"...I thought you were in Hoenn?" Green enquired and I sighed.

_Great... just what I didn't need, some cosy catch up chat in the middle of a town I shouldn't even be in. I should be back at home... back in Goldenrod... back with Gold._

"...and I thought you went to Johto for that tournament?"

Now I decided to look at the boy named Ruby.

He was about as tall as Gold, but his features gave away that he was younger than him. His eyes were a lovely crimson colour, very similar to Red, and his hair was shorter and spikier.

Now I felt like a fool for thinking he was some-one else.

Green chuckled again.

"I was, but I only went to see how Red was doing in his new job.."

"Oh yeah! Man.. I haven't seen Red for a long time! How is he nowadays?"

I cringed at Ruby's accent.

It was loud and brash, definitely from Hoenn, born and bred it seemed.

"He is good, still his usual indifferent self but, yeah everything is good..."

I glanced up at Green, watching his eyes literally light up every time Red's name was mentioned.

_He must really love him...maybe even more than I loved Gold... _

Ruby smiled, flashing a brilliant white smile.

"I must go and see him sometime, and have a catch up! So... what brings you to Celadon?"

I loved how everyone was ignoring me right now, but not like I really cared about it.

_ In fact the subject of my embarrassing antics could easily be brushed underneath the metaphorical carpet for all I cared._

"I have work and stuff...you know, nothing I can't handle!"

"Still... I am well jealous! You got to go to Johto for a tournament, and I wasn't even told about it until today!"

"Well... Silver just came from Johto..." Green finally introduced me, making me stare down at the dark haired boy.

I watched his face contort to a frown, he must have remembered my stupid mistake.

"...so that's Silver? I didn't actually think he would be a freak..."

I glared at him through cold silver eyes, burrowing deep into his soul.

_Was it talk of the town that I was a weirdo or something?_

"Hey, he's not that bad once you get to know him..." Green mused playfully, ruffling my red hair with his hand.

I scowled and instantly batted it away.

"...I thought you were someone else..." I admitted, feeling so incredibly sorry for myself.

Ruby raised an eyebrow at me curiously before shrugging it off.

"...and that gave you permission to touch me?"

"Give him a break Ruby, he's just broken up with some-one..."

I rolled my eyes.

_Great going Green, tell the whole freakin' world!_

Ruby smiled in amusement, almost as if he didn't believe the older boy's words.

"You're joking, right? Silver...being in a relationship? Well, that is destined for disaster before it's even begun!"

And strangely enough he was right.

_ Every relationship I had ever had, whether it be in a romantic way or a friendship way had all ended badly. Maybe it was just me? _

I frowned, not wanting to argue in the middle of town with a boy who was younger than me, and shorter than me.

"I don't think it ended because of how Silver behaved..." Green mumbled, looking at me with a concerned expression.

I wasn't prepared to explain my love life to these losers, in fact if I didn't hurry up I would be so royally late for my shift.

"...well whatever... I really have to get going, I only have an hour for lunch break so... see you around!"

Green waved to Ruby and I watched as the shorter boy skipped away happily down the street.

Feeling like I had just stepped into a bear trap I sighed.

_Why couldn't I have just ignored him? Why did I have to act like such a fucking idiot?_

"...you thought he was Gold, didn't you?" Green's voice was soft as we finally continued our journey towards the department store.

I shrugged half heartedly, not really wanting to tell him anything that raged through my mind.

_ For that split second I had a moment of weakness, that was all it was._

"...it doesn't matter..."

"You need to call him...tell him how you feel..."

I pushed my hands into my pockets, now once again feeling the burning sun on my exposed neck.

` "I can't do that..."

_Of course Green would never understand my actions, hell I didn't most of the time, but I had to do this. Gold was in danger if he was with me, he could be safe now, knowing I was out of the picture._

"...you won't know unless you try..."

Scowling to myself I realised that the sooner I accepted my fate and tried to move on, the less this would hurt in the long run.

_But still... it was hard to say goodbye to such a major part of my life._

* * *

Celadon Department store was huge, much bigger than the one in Goldenrod, and a part of me flinched at the sight of it.

I could so easily get lost in this place.

_I didn't even know what floor I was meant to be working on!_

But still, it was such a beautiful building, and even though I felt somewhat intimidated, another side of me felt proud to be working here.

"Well... this is your stop!" Green called out happily, indicating with his hand to the large building.

I weakly nodded, silently grateful for his company, even if he was annoying as hell.

"It is..."

"I shall probably see you around sometime!"

By the sound of his voice it wasn't a maybe, it was more like a definitely, not that I minded.

Green wasn't that bad once you got over the initial shock of his colourful personality, and the accent that laced his voice.

_But still... I had no idea what floor I would be working on..._

`"Yeah... do you know what floor the scent department is on?" I enquired in a quiet voice.

Green smiled.

"Of course! It's the second floor, just take the elevator!"

I nodded, hoping that the elevator here wasn't as temperamental as the one back in Goldenrod.

_ But still, I was thankful for the directions, otherwise I could have spent the majority of my life stuck in there, just aimlessly wondering about in circles._

"...thanks..."

"No problem! Take care kid!"

I watched as the emerald eyed boy waved to me and walked off down the town.

It was now I noticed he was going back the way we came.

_My eyes widened as I realised Green didn't actually need to come this way, he was merely escorting me. But why? I had told him I was fine!_

I frowned, both at Green's idiotic ways and the harsh sun beating down on my back.

Then I gazed up at the large building, ready to start my new working life in a new town, and hopefully find Blue somewhere.

After all, she must have been in Kanto from the phone call Green received.

Puffing my chest out subconsciously I trundled towards the large glass double doors, ready to take on whatever was thrown at me.

_Why was it that this place was so much bigger on the inside? It was like walking inside the freakin' Tardis! _

Low ambient music cooed in my ears as I wondered towards where the elevator stood.

_Second floor...second floor..._

As I pressed the button and waited my mind wondered once again.

_It wondered to many things, from Gold... to Cyan and his psycho ways... to Green and Red, and about how dysfunctional their relationship would be. _

The large doors opened, and slowly I stepped inside, pressing the button for the second floor.

Yes, as expected this elevator was a lot better than the one I was used to, at least I wouldn't have to fight with it constantly.

Things just seemed to run better here, like nothing was rushed and everything happened at it's own pace.

_ Even life... here it just seemed to run smoother with no complications. _

_Perhaps it was just me being weird..._

I stepped out of the elevator and immediately my eyes caught sight of the scent counter, which I was so used to standing behind.

There was a short haired girl behind it, scribbling something down on a piece of paper, while a phone was tucked between her ear and shoulder.

Cautiously I stepped forward, not really wanting to disturb her just yet, after all it could have been an important phone call.

"Yes... okay...alright I won't get out the late slips if it was your fault. Alright then... I'll see you around lunch time, okay? Bye!"

I stood at the counter, feeling my heart creep into my throat as she put the phone down, and huffed.

A pair of large blue eyes met mine, and before I even had a chance to say anything I was being pulled into an almighty bear hug, stronger than anything I had ever felt.

"OH MY GOD! SILVER?!"

_ I knew that voice! It was Blue! I would be working with Blue?! _

I smiled, wider than I have ever smiled before as I cuddled the taller girl.

_Damn her, why was she always taller than me? I would have expected her to stop growing at some point. _

As she pulled away from me for a moment her eyes inspected my face for what seemed like forever.

_Yes... it was really me..._

"Hi Blue..." I said sheepishly, feeling like an idiot.

I was sure her face would crack with how wide her smile was, but I would be lying if I said it didn't make me happy.

Seeing Blue after so long really was a breath of fresh air.

She didn't look all that different, apart from the fact she changed her hair style. It was now bobbed around her face making her look even older than me! I felt like I was a teenager in comparison. She also wore a little bit of make up around her eyes and her lips shone with clear lipgloss. She was also taller than I remember, but it was still the same old Blue I knew from when we were kids.

She kept her hands on my shoulders, and the smile refused to leave her face.

"I am so happy to see you! What the hell are you even doing in Kanto?!"

Weirdly enough I felt like I owed her an explanation, even when the counter top was digging into my ribs.

But it didn't matter.

"... I got transferred for some reason..."

It was now her smile morphed into confusion.

Slowly she released my shoulder, allowing me to move once again.

As I slipped behind the counter I removed my backpack and placed it underneath the counter for safe keeping. I wasn't really prepared to store it away anywhere.

I watched her retrieve a red folder from underneath the counter, and started to fiddle through a lot of papers. Then she pulled out a single sheet of paper and scanned it with her questioning blue eyes.

Then she shook her head.

"You are only here to cover for a few days Silver..."

I felt my mouth hang open lazily as the information started to process in my mind.

"W-what...?"

She nodded and showed me the paper.

It was true.

I was only scheduled to work for three days because some-one was sick or something.

_I wasn't... transferred... so why did Cyan...?_

And at that moment my legs felt so incredibly weak that I believed I might just collapse in a heap on the floor.

"...were you told that you were transferred?" Blue asked, placing a hand on my shoulder to steady my trembling body.

I weakly nodded, feeling every muscle in my body contract painfully.

_Cyan... he must have known this! He lied to me! He LIED! HE TOLD ME I WAS BEING TRANSFERRED!_

I clenched my hands into fists, biting into my lip.

_So... I had so willingly broke Gold's heart for no reason... he knew that I would come back, and he knew that I would act the way I did. This was all FUCKING PLANNED!_

"Hang on sweetheart, I'll ring up the store and find out what's going on..."

I was so thankful for Blue being here right now, even after so long she had taken up the roll of supportive best friend just like before. It was as if we never separated.

I sat down on the kick stool, holding my head in my hands as I heard Blue dial a number on the phone and wait for a reply.

_What was I going to do now? I even had the chance to fix things with Gold when he rang me on the train! I was so fucking stupid!_

"Hello...? Red...? It's me Blue calling from the Celadon department store..."

Her voice rang softly in my ears as the grip on my head got tighter and tighter, my lungs feeling as if I couldn't breathe any more.

"...I am fine thank you...I am phoning you to enquire about Silver's position in our store. Is it a permanent arrangement, or merely temporary as we agreed?"

_What would I do if I was told I could go back home in three days? What would I do when I saw Cyan again? Probably kill the fucker... _

Blue glanced across at me and smiled awkwardly before she nodded.

"Okay... I thought so! So... why did Silver assume he was working here permanently?"

_ I knew... it was all Cyan's doing.. and I swear next time I saw him he would wish he was dead! _

I took a deep breath, feeling my insides ache.

_What have I done...?_

"Alright...well I think you need to sort out your staff...Silver is in bits right now!"

Now the protective best friend side just flourished from the taller girl. She wasn't being professional, just concerned, and that was very sweet of her.

_But in all honestly this had all been my own fault._

"...thank you...bye!"

And the phone conversation ended.

I could hear Blue's annoyance as she sighed.

_Obviously Cyan had known about this and lied to me on purpose. I wonder if he would get the sack now after all this?_

"...it seems there were some crossed wires, or some shit like that, not like I believe that bullshit"

She placed her hands on her hips as I couldn't even muster the courage to stand any more.

"...this is a complete and utter mess..." I mumbled pathetically, feeling my chest tighten up and water sting my eyes.

I wanted to cry, to unleash all this pain and anguish that ravaged my insides, I wanted to cave in and allow everyone to see my vulnerabilities but I couldn't.

_That was something I didn't deserve. _

Blue quickly filed away the sheet of paper back into the red folder before she knelt down to look at me.

"...you can talk to me about it if it will make you feel better?"

I looked up at her kind face, seeing her soft gentle smile, and for once I knew I could confide in her just like I used to, I could open up and spill all my insides out on the floor and she wouldn't judge me. She never did, that was one of the qualities I admired about Blue.

Shakily I stood up, having to lean on the counter for support.

"Yeah... I think I will..."

* * *

_But where would I start? From the beginning?_

_ From when I met Cyan and found out he was raging lunatic that wanted nothing more than to destroy me? Or did she want to know about how I had fallen so uncontrollably in love with Gold, and had so easily broken his heart like it meant nothing to me?_

_ Okay... the beginning. _

I ended up confessing literally everything to the brunette, starting from when I was horrible to Cyan's brother, to when I discovered I was working with Cyan, and how at first he was okay.

Then I got into detail about Gold and I, and every so often I could see her smiling at me. I wasn't sure whether it was out of kindness or just sheer pervertedness, not that I cared.

I even told her about when he took advantage of me for the first time in my apartment, and that I didn't even have the energy to pull away.

Blue had said something along the lines of...

"OH MY GOD! No way?! …so he sucked you off, and you were totally cool with that?"

"Obviously not! But...things just escalated after that.."

Blue loved gossip, especially that of the rude variety, so if it involved dirty fuck buddy sex then she was all ears. I didn't even know why I told her all the details, I don't know why I trembled when the memories resurfaced, but they did.

But still, she didn't judge me, she just listened and smiled.

Then I managed to tell her about when Cyan discovered it was me that hurt his brother, and how he had easily found out Gold and I loved each other, and had vowed to destroy us.

Blue didn't seem too happy about that.

"THAT FUCKER! I swear... if he ever hurts you... he is a dead man!"

I smiled, a genuine smile.

It had been so long since my face had contorted into a grin that I almost forgot how to do it.

_But, that was Blue for you. She could be so protective at times, and I knew that if she ever met Cyan she would probably beat him to a pulp, closely followed by me._

"...yeah, so that's why I broke Gold's heart to come here... because Cyan wants to hurt him to get at me..." I mumbled, leaning across the counter, pushing my forehead against my arms.

_God, my life story so far was pitiful. _

Blue placed a hand on my shoulder in support.

"...well maybe it's not too late, huh? When you have done your three day stint here you can surprise Gold! I know he would love that!"

I sighed, lifting my head up in case any customers arrived.

_It just wasn't that simple, what if he hated me now? What if Crystal had convinced him to move on without me?_

"...I don't know..."

"Come on Silver! Snap out of it! The Silver I used to know wouldn't sulk about something he was unhappy with... he would take life by the balls and kick it to death to make sure he got what he wanted!"

I smirked, loving Blue's way with words.

_Yeah, maybe I had mellowed slightly with age, but still... the only thing I wanted to kick the shit out of right now was Cyan's head._

"...and if your in love.. well...you can't let it go..."

She winked at me and gave me a small pat on my back before she greeted a customer that had just wondered up to the counter.

Standing up straight I wondered if she was right.

_Would I actually be able to put things right between Gold and I? I had some serious grovelling to do, but still... Gold wasn't heartless. And I was in love... so much in love with him that he was the only damn thing that ever entered my damn mind! So I couldn't let it go, I wouldn't! Not now I knew there was still a chance._

Once Blue had helped the lady choose the right scent for her Pokemon she had wondered over to me to continue the conversation.

"...and to be honest I think you two would make a really great couple!"

"...seriously?" I asked, rolling my eyes at the brunette.

She smiled wildly.

"Of course! So what, you're gay, big fucking deal! But at least you have fell in love with some-one decent and not a player or something..."

I guess she was right, Gold was a decent guy, and would never do anything to hurt me.

_In fact... I was more likely to hurt him! I was the poisonous party in our relationship. _

Aimlessly rearranging stock on the shelves I mumbled;

"...but I will just end up hurting him! Or leaving him... like I did with you..."

"Hey! Don't think like that! What happened to us was different! And besides... we weren't a couple!"

I felt like she wanted to hit me for saying that, but when I looked into her sparkling blue eyes all I saw was kindness, a friendship that I had longed for most of my life.

"...true, but you know what I mean..."

"If you keep thinking you are going to screw up, or you keep waiting for the opportunity to then things will never work out! Sometimes you have to take chances in life! You never know... Gold could be _'the one'_.."

She made hyphens with her fingers to elaborate what she said and I sighed.

_I was eighteen, not eighty! I wasn't even thinking of settling down! Okay... I loved Gold but that was one hurdle out of many. _

I smirked, rolling my eyes at the taller girl.

"...don't be silly! You honestly don't believe in all that bullshit do you?"

She looked thoughtful for a moment.

"Well...yeah I suppose I do. Everyone has a soul mate, you just never know where to expect it. It could literally be sitting there under your nose the entire time!"

I frowned, and decided to stop rearranging stuff.

Blue was looking at me weirdly, like I was messing up her display or something.

"...maybe.."

"You never know... Gold could turn out to be the fucking love of your life!" She literally called out.

I flinched as I felt her arms wrap around me tightly, cuddling me as if I were a plush toy or something.

Still, it wasn't something I hated.

I smiled, inhaling the scent of coconut that emitted from her hair.

Must have been the shampoo.

_But still... Gold? The love of my life...? Was that even possible?_

* * *

Time went by quite quickly and before I knew it was lunch time.

Blue seemed rather excited when this time came for some reason, and I had no idea to why.

_Was it the end of her shift? I hoped not... I had only just been reunited with her..._

As I served a young boy I watched a tall man walk out of the elevator and towards our kiosk.

His wild hair caught my attention along with his smart attire.

My eyes widened in shock as I literally heard Blue swoon in the background.

_No way..._

"Well... isn't this a nice surprise?" He cooed softly, smiling wildly as his thick Kanto accent danced in the open air.

_I couldn't believe it! It was Green! Did he work here?_

"Green!" Blue squeaked happily, wanting to hug him but obviously too preoccupied with making a cellowrap to jump over the counter and tackle the older boy.

I just folded my arms and stared at him.

He was dressed differently to the last time I saw him, all professional like, in a shirt and tie with fitting black trousers.

"What the hell are you doing here?" I asked.

He adjusted his tie on his shirt before clearing his throat.

"I work here!"

"You... work... here?" I repeated, indicating to the kiosk I stood behind.

Green nodded and smiled.

_I couldn't believe it! In Goldenrod City I worked with Red and now I was working with his boyfriend? This was... weird.._

"Green is the Deputy Manager..." Blue whispered across to me as she tied a bow on her creation.

I looked at the emerald eyed boy with a gaping mouth and wide eyes.

_ No way! Deputy Manager?! But he only looked in his Twenties! How did he...?_

"...my main job is being a Gym Leader at Viridian City, but this is my second occupation"

This was all too much for me to handle right now.

_He was a Gym leader too?! Man... that meant he was good at battling as well as managing a team of people. No wonder people swooned after him._

I looked across at Blue who had finished her cellophane creation and looked at it in wonder.

_How the hell did anyone make those things anyway?!_

"It's time for your lunch Blue..." Green mumbled, and almost immediately she leapt up to leave, allowing Green to take her place.

I grumbled to myself, something about it being unfair that I was stuck with the wild haired boy yet again.

_ I already had the privilege of sharing a train journey, and now this?_

"I'll see you in a bit Silver!" She called out to me, waving as she walked away towards the elevator.

I sighed, hearing Green walk behind the kiosk to stand beside me.

_Was he stalking me too? Like Cyan did?_

"So... how are you getting on? Has Blue told you where everything is?"

_Ha... no? Mainly because all we had done since I got here was talk about my life. But I wasn't going to drop her in the shit, so I just nodded. _

Green looked thoughtful before moving Blue's cellophane creation to sit on top of a display.

It looked so pretty.

"Have you found anywhere to stay yet?" Green asked as he rearranging a few items.

I sighed, feeling like he was my Dad or something.

_ It really wasn't any of his business!_

"...it's not a permanent thing... I'm only here for three days..." I mumbled.

"And your point is? You can't bunk at Pokemon Centre's for three days!"

"I don't really have much of a choice..." I grumbled at the older boy.

He paused and shifted on his feet uncomfortably.

"I don't like this..." He mused quietly.

"Like what?"

"...your Red's friend, I don't want you staying in some shabby Pokemon Centre!"

I rolled my eyes, seriously wanting to hit him for that comment.

_ I was not Red's friend! We weren't even acquaintances!_

"...I am not Red's friend! He hardly talks to me, actually... scrap that.. he hardly talks to anyone!"

Green looked at me for a moment before frowning.

_ Did I actually hurt him with that comment?_

"...that's weird... he's never like that with me.."

"Maybe because you fuck each other and know literally everything about each other?" I commented, and instantly regretted it.

_Shit! As if I just spoke like that to the Deputy Manager! _

I bit my tongue and waited for some insult back.

But it didn't come.

"...maybe...or maybe he isn't used to mixing with a lot of people. When it's just me and him I usually can't get him to shut up!" He chuckled as he combed his fingers through his wild hair.

I raised an eyebrow.

_He was joking right? Red... talkative...? In the same sentence? No way!_

"...now I know you are pulling my leg!"

Green shook his head, deadly serious.

"I am not. Red used to be quite outgoing and talkative when it was just me and him, he even used to sing when he was happy. He has such a lovely voice..."

I heard Green sigh, like he was reminiscing once again.

_Now Red singing? This is just not right!_

I coughed, trying not to choke on my own spit in shock.

I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

_We were talking about the same Red, right?_

"...okay... this is weird..."

"Anyway! Enough about Red...like I said before I don't like the idea of you stopping at the Pokemon Centre..."

I rolled my eyes.

"I will be fine, it's not like it's infested with the plague or anything!"

He shook his head, but decided to leave the subject.

I watched as he glanced at Blue's cellophane creation.

"...can you make one of those?"

I looked from Green to the pretty creation that stood proud on the counter.

Weakly I shook my head.

"You have got to be joking, right? We never made one of those in Goldenrod!"

He rolled his eyes but smiled nonetheless.

"Well then... it's time you learned how!"

_Okay... wrapping cellophane around some scent bottles shouldn't be too difficult, right? Well... to me it was the hardest thing in the entire world. _

Everything just kept falling down, and slowly I was losing patience.

Every time I would go to tie everything up the bottles would fall down and I would go into a prissy rage over it.

I hated my anger sometimes.

Green had noticed and seemed to find this whole situation funny.

"I told you I suck at this!" I cried out, deciding to give up my failed attempt at cello-wrapping.

"Just take your time!" Green called out, smiling.

Grumbling to myself I decided to start from scratch and threw the old cellophane that was crumpled in the rubbish bag.

Taking a deep breath I decided to try again.

I used every ounce of my concentration to ensure the bastard bottles didn't fall over, and so far they wasn't.

I stuck my tongue out slightly as I tried to make the ribbon into a bow so it would make it all pretty.

_Of course that was royally failing..._

As I was about to give up once again I felt hands on top of mine, guiding them slowly over the ribbon to create a bow.

"Sometimes... you just need to focus a little bit more..." Green cooed softly, standing over me as his hands guided mine.

At that moment my heart was literally in my throat.

His voice was soft, his hands were gentle as they helped me and his chest was pressed against my back.

_So... why was I getting flustered about this? _

I took a deep breath, watching as the ribbon was made into a bow that sat beautifully around the cellophane creation.

I quickly withdrew my hands and placed them by my side as I looked at what I had made.

Not as good as Blue's but close enough.

I moved to the side, watching as Green lifted it up to place it beside Blue's.

He smiled.

"See? It wasn't so bad was it?" He looked at me, still wearing that smile, and at that moment all I could feel was the pounding of my heart as the warmth of his fingers still lingered on mine.

I closed my eyes momentarily, fighting off this horrible sickening feeling that congealed in my stomach.

_What the hell just happened...?_

* * *

Blue's lunch ended quite quickly and not long after that Green had said his goodbye's and left all too quickly.

Obviously he had some more business to attend to, probably Gym issues.

Blue smiled wildly at my creation, even though I honestly thought it sucked balls.

"Awww Silver! It looks great!"

"Don't lie to me Blue... it sucks... I know..." I grumbled.

She giggled and cuddled me yet again.

It was at that moment I thought about what Green said.

_Did I need change in my life? Would that alter the direction of it?_

As I pulled away from Blue I gazed at her hair, at how it was bobbed around her face but perfectly defined, like she was a movie star or something.

Taking a deep breath I decided that maybe this wouldn't be such a bad idea.

"Blue...?"

She looked at me with large eyes.

"Yes...?"

Closing my eyes momentarily I managed to muster the courage to say the words.

"...will you cut my hair for me?"

* * *

**Author's Note: OMG! :O BAD CYAN! You lied to Silver! What will happen now? Will Silver decide to go back to Johto for Gold? Review please :3 thank chuuu~**


	14. Dying from the Inside

**Author's note: Hey all, seems like I haven't updated for a while... so sorry about that. This chapter will be intense so any of you who are prone to feelings of any kind please have tissues handy. Anyway... enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter Fourteen: Dying from the Inside**

Blue's eyes widened as those words escaped my lips, and a deafening silence consumed both of us. It was as if she didn't know what to say to me, maybe she was unsure of the response she might receive.

I wasn't sure.

But soon enough she managed to choke out some words.

"...you want me to... cut your hair?"

I nodded weakly, knowing that Blue was the only person I would trust to do that for me. The likelihood of me cutting my own hair was very slim, and besides I was deadly with a pair of scissors.

"...but why? I thought you loved your hair?" She murmured, reaching out a hand to comb her fingers through my red locks.

I closed my eyes, breathing in deeply.

_It was true, I did. _

I was used to having long hair, but now my hair linked me and Gold together. If that was gone, then I could start again and hopefully put right all the things I did wrong.

"I did... but I need you to do this for me"

She frowned as her fingers removed themselves from my hair and her hand fell limply at her side.

"...it just wouldn't be you without your hair Silver..."

I shrugged, knowing that if I put it off for much longer I would never muster the courage to do it.

"I don't care, I need you to cut it off..."

I opened my eyes and gazed at her face.

She looked hurt, but I couldn't understand why.

_Hair will always grow back, it was no big deal. Oh who was I kidding! It was a big deal! But, I needed to do this._

"...okay then, I'll do it after work for you..." Blue murmured in defeat, faking a smile.

I nodded, secretly glad that she agreed to it. It's not as if I wanted to go bald or anything, I just needed a change of pace and this was a good place to start.

"Thank you"

I watched the older girl lean on the counter as a sigh escaped her lips.

"...it's going to be so weird seeing you with short hair..."

"I'm sure you'll get used to it"

She looked across at me for a moment before her eyes fell on the display in front of her.

"Yeah... well, I won't have a choice, will I?"

She giggled and then instantly stood up when a customer approached the counter.

I watched as she spoke to the young male Pokemon Trainer who had an Aipom sitting on his shoulder. My eyes concentrated on the purple monkey for some time.

_Gold had an Aipom...only his Aipom was far more energetic and playful than this trainer's. His Aipom liked to wear his hat a lot, and play around with the goggles he used to wear when he was younger. I missed those times... _

Sighing to myself my ears detected the phone start to ring. Usually I hated answering the telephone at work, but I had no other choice right now.

Cautiously I picked up the phone and cleared my throat before speaking.

"Good afternoon Celadon Department Store, Silver speaking... how may I help?"

There was a pause before a familiar yet haunting voice chilled my bones.

"Hello... Silver"

My eyes widened as I nearly dropped the phone out of my hands.

My brain seemed to just turn to jelly as I realised just who it was who was calling me.

_It was Cyan!_

"What the fuck do you want Cyan?!" I bellowed into the receiver, both in anger and shock.

I heard him chuckle and it sent a horrible shiver down my spine.

"I wanted to check up on you, to see how you were getting on over there. Is that such a crime?"

I wanted to smash his head in right now, but I couldn't, and that just made me even more angry. The sarcasm danced off his tongue, and it just made my blood boil with rage.

"You lied to me... you FUCKER! You told me I was being transferred! YOU LIED TO ME!"

My eyes darted across to Blue who had now started to stare at me, her face looking pained, probably because I was swearing on the shop floor. But right now I didn't care.

I heard Cyan chuckle once again.

"...so I might have missed out that small detail, so what?"

"So what? SO WHAT?! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT I HURT GOLD!"

Once again I continued shouting down the receiver, knowing that probably everyone was staring at me.

_If I had my way I would catch the next train to Goldenrod and royally murder his ass. Prison I could deal with if I got the opportunity to kill him._

"I believe you did that all by yourself Silver... you had a choice to continue your relationship, or whatever it was that you had. You chose to hurt him, I only gave you a scenario to deal with"

I gritted my teeth, trying to remember to breathe.

He was really getting on my nerves, and I hated how this punk knew what buttons to press to get me so riled up.

I clenched my other hand into a fist as I continued this conversation.

"How the hell could I continue our relationship when you told me I would never be working in Goldenrod again! I swear to God... when I see you... I'll..."

"You'll what, Silver?" He challenged, and I just knew that he was probably smirking at my misfortunes.

My body was starting to tremble with the adrenaline that was flooding my veins.

"...I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!"

"Silver..." Blue whispered across to me, shaking her head.

I knew I shouldn't be using such foul language on the shop floor, but it was Cyan. I was entitled to scream and shout at him.

Then I heard him laugh loudly into my ear.

"...I don't think threatening me is a good idea, considering all your friends here think you have sexually abused me..."

I looked over to Blue who had just finished serving the boy with the Aipom.

I had a feeling that my expression gave away just how confused I was about what he just said.

_Sexually... abused? _

_I never did that! I hit him, that was all!_

"W-what...?!"

I didn't even know what to say to that.

_What if he told Gold that I had abused him? Would Gold believe his malicious lies?! _

Blue slowly walked over to me, watching me intently like a hawk.

"You heard me...I told all your friends the real reason why you left was because you couldn't face up to the fact you sexually abused me, and... with all the bruises on my face... it didn't take long for them to believe me"

My mouth just dropped open as all that anger just escaped my body and left me feeling paralysed.

_Why would he do that?!_

I felt Blue's hand on my shoulder for comfort, and I was so glad she was here for me.

_Gold...I hoped he didn't believe Cyan's lies...he knew me! He knew I would never do that to anyone!_

"...you...you...BASTARD!" I yelled as Blue glared at me, obviously wondering who it was that was upsetting me. If she had her way she would probably snatch the phone off me and start giving him a piece of her mind. But this was my mess, I needed to sort this out.

_Was Cyan making it so I wouldn't return back to Johto because of the rumours? _

"So if I was you I would stay in Kanto... and never come back. Besides... you don't have to worry about Gold any more, he is well and truly over you"

And at that moment I felt my heart contract painfully in my chest.

_Gold... did he believe Cyan? Did he... believe I would be capable of doing something so...monstrous?_

I could feel my eyes sting with tears that threatened to fall, but no, I wouldn't let Cyan get to me!

I placed my hand on the counter to steady my balance.

"...what have you done to him?!"

"I haven't done anything, in fact, I am the one who has been here for him since the whole 'breakup' thing. You should be happy! Isn't this what you wanted? You wanted Gold to move on without you, and I am helping him do just that..."

That was it.

I gripped my head tightly with my hands allowing the receiver to fall onto the ground.

I leant over the counter fighting off tears that longed to fall down my face.

_No...Gold... he wouldn't...NO!_

I closed my eyes, now allowing tears to trickle down my face as I heard Blue pick up the phone.

"Listen here you fucking prick, if you ever... and I mean EVER hurt Silver again... you are a fucking dead man!"

It still didn't help me right now.

_My mind became clouded with images... horrible twisted images of Gold and Cyan together, of Cyan comforting Gold about me breaking his heart... and... and..._

"NOOOOOO!" I screamed, feeling as if my heart was being forcefully ripped from my chest.

I couldn't breathe, I couldn't see anything, I just felt light headed like I just wanted to die right now.

"...I don't give a shit about what he's done! He's my best friend! You better fucking leave him alone or else!" Blue continued to curse down the phone.

It was nice having some-one on my side, but still, it didn't make the pain any less.

My fingers dug harder into my hair, almost ripping chunks out of my scalp, and I bit my lip so hard droplets of blood started to appear on the counter.

_Gold...no...please...wait for me...I am so sorry! Don't...don't let Cyan win..._

"If you ever call this establishment ever again I am reporting you to the police! Now... FUCK OFF AND LEAVE US ALONE!"

And with that Blue slammed the phone down in rage.

I didn't see her, or hear another word from her, I just felt her slender feminine arms wrap around my shoulder's tightly.

And I broke down completely.

My chest heaved painfully with every gulp of air that I inhaled, and my legs trembled underneath my body weight.

_Right now... I wanted to die...anything would be better than this..._

"Silver..." Blue cooed softly, rubbing my shoulder's gently as I just bawled loudly onto the counter, feeling my lip sting where my teeth had fetched blood.

_Gold... he was the only thing that was holding me together... the only thing I had in my life that was positive...and now... it was gone._

"...I've ruined everything...Blue...I've ruined... everything..." I managed to choke out in between sobs.

She continued rubbing my shoulder's softly.

"Now now, calm down. You haven't ruined anything. That prick was probably lying to get this sort of reaction from you..."

I shook my head desperately, knowing that Cyan would not lie about this to me.

No, he definitely would tell all my friends that I had sexually assaulted him. He wanted everyone to hate me, for me to feel as low as he did right now.

_And all because of his stupid little brother!_

"...no...Gold...he will...hate me...he...and Cyan... they..."

I couldn't choke out any more words. It was too painful to speak any more so I just stayed quiet, still trying to focus on breathing and to ignore the stinging sensation that ravaged my cut lip.

"Shhhh..." She soothed softly, resting her head against my back as I sprawled out on the counter.

"..I'll call Green... he might know what to do..."

"No...I don't..."

"It wasn't a question Silver, I am calling Green and that is final!"

I felt her body move off me as I just stayed motionless, feeling so incredibly sorry for myself.

_The only person I ever truly loved in my entire life... hated me now...and now my heart just felt like it was dying from the inside, poisoning me slowly, infecting my entire body._

Fusing my eyes shut the tears would not stop falling down my face.

_I never realised what it would feel like to be heartbroken... I had often just assumed it was something that was merely fiction...but now I knew what it felt like. I knew what it felt like to have some-one rip your heart from your chest and stab it to death right in front of your eyes._

"Green..? Green! Thank goodness you answered! I need your help! It's Silver..."

And slowly her voice was beginning to fade from my memory as my legs just seemed to collapse underneath me, and everything just went black.

* * *

_I opened my eyes to darkness all around me, and deafening silence. _

_Deep inside a part of me wondered something. _

_Was I dead? Did my heart literally die in my chest?_

_ I tried screaming, as loud as I could muster. But no noise came out of my mouth. It was like I was drowning in a black abyss, constantly lost in the darkness. _

_It was as if my body was floating on air, a feeling of weightlessness consumed me as I floated through the void. _

_Was I really dead? Was this it?_

_ Slowly I closed my eyes, succumbing to this safe feeling that coursed through my body. Maybe this wasn't so bad. Here, I was safe, secure, I had no bad feelings...no sadness...no regret. _

_But a small voice niggled at the back of my head, pestering me, tormenting me._

_ "Silver...wake up!" _

_It sounded so near, yet so far away at the same time, but I just didn't have any energy left to fight. Drifting around in this never ending dark void seemed the best option right now._

_ "Silver! Open your eyes!" _

_The voice continued to ring in my ears and slowly I managed to open them._

_ I was still surrounded by darkness, but only this time I felt like I wasn't alone. Someone else was here. My eyes probed the abyss for answers, for any clue that something else was here. _

_I could feel it, I could sense another heartbeat echo in the emptiness. _

_ "Silver..." _

_The voice seemed soft, yet painful, like whoever was saying my name was upset._

_ And then my eyes noticed a pair of soft amber ones staring back at me. The same amber eyes that belonged to Gold. _

_And as if by magic my heart started to pulsate faster inside my chest, making all those horrible feelings emerge from beyond the grave once again._

_ "G-Gold..." I mumbled, outstretching a hand to his body that hovered just before me. _

_Was he dead too? Were we... both dead?_

_ My fingers gently danced across his face, feeling the smoothness of his skin. I watched as he smiled softly._

_ "You... came back for me..." The dark haired boy mumbled, now outstretching his hand to mine so our fingers intertwined. _

_I had never actually held Gold's hand, and I only just realised how lovely it felt. I felt safe. _

_And slowly I felt tears form in the corner of my eyes._

_ I seriously must be dead..._

_ "...I am so sorry..." I mumbled sadly, squeezing his hand softly, never wanting to let go. _

_His face contorted to a sad smile, which seemed more like a frown._

_ "You came back for me...that is all that matters..."_

_ As both of our bodies floated in this dark void I wrapped my other arm around his shoulder so we were both close. Our noses briefly touched as I closed my eyes. _

_I really wished that this was the afterlife, because this was just the best thing right now._

_ "I... love you Gold..." I managed to choke out, feeling tears fall down my face._

_ Then a pair of soft inviting lips connected with mine, and at that moment I just felt complete, like nothing and no-one could ever hurt me. _

_My hand released his so I could gently touch his face as we kissed. It felt like I hadn't kissed him for a lifetime and even if this wasn't real, or the afterlife it was nice to know Gold was always there. _

_As we broke from the kiss my heart thundered deep inside my chest. _

_I loved Gold more than life itself, and without him there was no point in living._

_ "I love you too" He muttered as I opened my eyes. _

_I watched as his body started to fade from my sight, like something or some-one was taking him away from me._

_ Desperately I wrapped my arms around him, never wanting to let go. But as I looked at his smiling face I was finding it harder and harder to picture anything. _

_Everything was fading, I was losing sight._

_ "...please don't leave me..." I mumbled pathetically, feeling tears fall down my face. _

_And as his body slowly faded from my memory the last words I heard were;_

_ "I'm sorry..."_

* * *

"Silver? Silver?! Wake up!" A desperate voice pleaded in my ears which made me open my eyes reluctantly.

It was Blue, and she was standing over me looking worried.

I raised a hand to my head, feeling a terrible headache consume my brain cells.

_What the hell happened? _

I also noticed I was no longer at work, I was lying down in a soft bed looking up at a white ceiling with Blue's face close to mine in concern.

"W-what... happened?" I choked out, squinting as the bright light seemed to burn my eyes.

"You collapsed! Luckily we managed to get you to Green's house..."

So that was where I was right now, Green's house.

I grunted in annoyance, feeling my whole body ache terribly.

_So... seeing Gold... was that just a dream? _

I felt her hand grasp mine desperately as she sat down beside me.

"You frightened the living shit out of me! I thought you were dying or something!"

I never meant to make her worried, or to pass out, I guess all the stress took it's toll on me. Right now, I just felt exhausted, like I hadn't slept for months.

"Sorry..." I mumbled, hearing the words scratch the back of my throat.

Feeling weak I decided to close my eyes and just try to relax. There was no way I could go back to work any time soon, not with how my body was feeling.

I could hear Blue and Green's voices mingling in my head as they conversed.

"...how the hell did this happen Blue?"

"It's a long story Green, too long to even begin to tell. And besides... it should be Silver telling you..."

There was a pause as Green sighed.

"Is there a complication back in Johto?"

"...something like that...let's just say some weirdo is trying to ruin Silver's life right now..."

Too right he was.

_Fucking Cyan...and now he had taken Gold underneath his poisonous wings, and I was frightened it would be too late to do anything about it._

"I see...what did you hear of the telephone conversation?"

"...something about Cyan lying to Silver about staying in Kanto, and a lot of swearing. Something bad was said... but I didn't catch all of it. When I spoke to that Cyan creep he told me that Silver sexually abused him!"

I took a deep breath, still feeling annoyed about that.

_I would never have the heart to do that to my nemesis, let alone Cyan. So... why were my friends believing him over me?!_

"Total bullshit! I mean Silver is a bit snappy at times but... a rapist? No chance!"

"I know Green! I gave him a piece of my mind and warned him that if he dared phone the store again I would call the police. But still... what are we going to do now?"

A small smile danced across my lips as I continued to listen.

At least Green knew I was innocent, and he barely knew me. That was something to be grateful for.

_But... would Gold believe me too?_

"...you'll have to hold the fort at work, and I'll keep an eye on Silver..."

"Are you sure? I mean... don't you have Gym Leader stuff to do?"

That was a valid point, and I didn't want to be seen as a burden, but still, right now I could hardly move. Maybe it was because my heart literally skipped a beat and I collapsed.

"Don't worry about me, I can handle it. Just... go back to work and make sure everything is okay"

Slowly I opened my eyes and witnessed Blue's blurry face.

Soon I saw a kind and sincere smile smother her features as she gently held my hand.

"...will you be okay while I'm gone?"

I nodded weakly, feeling my eyelids get heavy once again.

She slowly rubbed my hand before letting go.

I watched as she stood up and faced Green.

"Okay then, just... call me if something happens, okay?"

"Don't worry Blue, I'll make sure he is okay"

I watched as the older girl left the room, leaving me alone with Green, not that I minded.

He was okay in small doses, and I doubted that he would try to annoy me given my state of mind.

The taller male sat down in the seat Blue was sitting in, and just stared at me.

His face expressed worry for some reason, _was I really sick or something?_

"...we need to sort out that weirdo you know, he can't just go around accusing people of rape!"

I just watched Green, at how he clasped his hands together, and his emerald eyes scanned the ceiling in thought.

"...but...how?" I croaked out, feeling the sudden urge to cough afterwards.

Green shrugged and sighed.

"I don't know, maybe I could talk to Red and get him fired or something, there must be something we can do..."

Weakly I shook my head, knowing that Cyan had probably covered his back so dismissal could be avoided, after all, he wanted to destroy me entirely.

I closed my eyes, suddenly finding it hard to breathe again.

_Was it all this talk of Cyan? Or was it the fact I was terrified that he was poisoning Gold? _

"You need to rest..." Green mused softly, his emerald eyes now gazing at me.

I didn't even have the energy to reply, I still felt like I was going to collapse again even though I was lying down.

My heart seemed to beat irregularly, and it would flutter occasionally in my chest. It was starting to make me feel sick.

Then I felt Green's hand gently touch my forehead, feeling how hot I was.

I didn't think I had a temperature or anything, but I guess it wouldn't hurt to be safe.

"Don't worry about this, Blue and I will sort this out" He assured me with a kind smile, as his fingers gently brushed aside strands of my hair that had fallen across my face.

I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, feeling a wave of lethargy wash over me.

_Why was he being so nice to me? I didn't deserve his kindness._

And soon enough I was able to drift off into an uncomfortable slumber, aided by my own restless thoughts.

* * *

_My limbs animated back into life when a chilling breeze attacked my bones. _

_Opening my eyes slowly I was met with a blanket of stars nestling high above in the heavens._

_ Was this a dream again?_

_ It was night time and surprisingly cold. I shivered, rubbing my arms to gain some heat. _

_The stars...if I made a wish... maybe all this could be sorted?_

_ "Silver?"_

_ I heard my name echo in the darkness which made me turn to look down at my lap. _

_It was Gold, he was resting his head on my leg, looking up at the starry night sky. It was so comforting to hear his voice in my ears, to feel his warmth against me, even if this was only a dream._

_ "Yes?" _

_He smiled at me softly, and for that moment I felt my heart melt like chocolate under a burning hot sun._

_ "Tell me that story about the stars again... you know, the one your Mother told you..." _

_It caught me off guard, but I smiled nonetheless. _

_Slowly I started to comb my fingers through his dark hair as my eyes scanned the network of gems in the sky._

_ "...okay, even though it's stupid..." _

_I took a deep breath, feeling somewhat unsettled right now. _

_Why did Gold want to know?_

_ "...when I was little and I felt like giving up... my Mom would always tell me to make a wish to the biggest and brightest star in the sky... to wish that things would get better, and to believe that nothing stays bad forever. I always thought it was stupid, but I used to do it, and sometimes... it did work. I even do it sometimes now, just because it makes me feel like I am still close to her in some way... even though I actually don't even know if she is still alive..." _

_I sighed, and stopped moving my fingers through Gold's hair._

_ It was stupid... but it did help me. It helped me have some hope, some faith in myself that things would always get better. And most of the time things did get better, it just took some time. _

_I smiled softly, reliving those memories._

_ "...weird isn't it? I even made a wish that one day I would even find love, or discover what it actually meant...seems like that wish did come true after all..." _

_I looked down at Gold noticing that his eyes were closed._

_ Did he fall asleep on me?!_

_ Typical Gold...then again I would fall asleep on me..._

_ "Gold..." I murmured, shaking the dark haired boy into waking. _

_Only he didn't wake up. _

_His eyes remained closed, his mouth hung open slightly and his body just seemed limp against mine._

_ I swallowed hard, gripping the dark haired boy harder._

_ "Gold.. wake up!" I commanded, watching as his head softly swayed back and forth in my lap. _

_Only he didn't wake up. _

_His eyes remained shut, closed off from the rest of the world._

_ And my heart was slowly increasing in pace. _

_What the... what the hell was going on?!_

_ "GOLD! WAKE THE FUCK UP ALREADY!" I screamed out, feeling my body tremble violently as his remained limp and lifeless. _

_My eyes widened as I witnessed the love of my life just remain motionless in my lap, no life animating his body into action. _

_Tears formed in my eyes suddenly as my heart hurt with every cursed beat. _

_No...he wasn't..._

_ "No... GOLD!" I cried out, holding his body tightly as I rested my forehead against his, feeling as if my whole life was now crashing down around me._

_ Gold...he was dead...but how?! What sort of dream was this?! But for a dream... it hurt so much... like someone was literally twisting a knife in my heart, watching it bleed out slowly. _

_I rocked backwards and forwards, holding Gold's lifeless body like it was the only thing keeping me together right now. _

_Why...? Why me...?_

_ I looked up quickly noticing we wasn't alone. _

_Standing a few metres away from us was none other than Cyan, wearing a grin the devil would be proud of._

_ It was his fault...he had taken Gold from me... _

_Taking one final gulp of air I cried out loudly into the heavens;_

_ "NOOOOOOOO!"_

* * *

I shot up suddenly from my slumber, hitting my head against the headboard in shock.

I cringed.

_Fuck... that was... a terrible nightmare._

I glanced around my surroundings realising I was still in Green's bed, and it was now dark.

_How long had I been asleep?_

Slowly I rubbed my eyes, still feeling my heart thunder in my chest.

_Gold... I watched him __die... but why?! Did my mind hate me too? _

Suddenly the bedroom door burst open and there stood a worried, and slightly out of breath Green.

"What the hell happened?! Are you okay?!"

_ Did I maybe scream out loud?_

I weakly nodded, feeling like a complete and utter idiot for doing that. It was only a dream, it wasn't real. But why did it feel real to me?

I watched as the taller boy moved away from the doorway and sat down on the edge of the bed.

His emerald eyes glanced at me as I struggled into a sitting position. As I rubbed my head slowly I answered his question.

"...I had a nightmare..."

"what about?"

I frowned, not really wanting to relive that horrible thought.

"...about Gold dying..."

Green's face contorted to sorrow as he just looked at me.

_Why was he even here? He should be out doing Gym leader things, or something. I didn't need his help._

"Well.. if you ever want to talk about stuff then you can talk to me... if it will help..."

He smiled awkwardly at me, and as I looked away at the bedsheets that were wrapped over my body like a cocoon I felt so incredibly sad right now.

_I loved Gold more than anything, but right now I doubted the possibility of ever getting our relationship back on track._

"...yeah... thanks..."

"Or if you just want to punch something, or shout or scream... that's cool too"

He chuckled softly.

I glanced back up at the older boy, now knowing why people seemed to flock to him like moths to a flame.

It was his personality, how he came across to others. Red never seemed to speak of Green much, and when he did he only said he nagged him about the job. But now I could see he only did that because he cared about Red, just like he cared about me.

"I'll bear that in mind next time..." I murmured, forcing a smile.

It was actually nice to have some-one here to talk to, and it was great to know that I could get everything off my chest if I needed to.

That was something of a rarity nowadays for me.

Green smiled softly at me as he stood up.

"I'll go and get you a glass of water..."

My eyes followed the taller boy as he wondered out of the room, leaving me in solitude once again.

And right now I was terrified of being alone.

When I was alone bad dreams and visions haunted my head.

_ I needed some-one here...I needed to feel safe, but right now I felt anything but safe._

I clutched the bed sheets tightly to my chest as my heart started to speed up dangerously.

_What if my dream was a vision of the future? _

_What...how would I cope with that...? I couldn't...there is no way I would survive. _

It didn't take long for Green to arrive with a glass of water.

I watched as the spiky haired male placed the glass on the beside table.

Then I watched him move to open the curtains, allowing some natural moonlight into the room. Deep inside the selfish part of me wanted Green to stay for a while, at least with him here I could relax a little.

_If he just abandoned me... I don't think I could cope right now._

"How are you feeling?" He enquired as he sat on the bed beside me.

I nodded weakly, reaching out to grab the glass of water.

"...I could be better..."

"Just... try not to worry about things back in Johto, everything will sort itself out, you'll see"

_Yeah right, if only he knew._

It wouldn't get better, in fact things were bound to just get worse. Cyan had vowed to destroy everything I loved, and that meant Gold.

And there was nothing I could do to stop him.

"...I need to go back home..." I murmured quietly, thinking that perhaps if I got to Johto tomorrow then I could sort this out before Gold hated me for life.

Green shook his head as I took a sip of water.

"That's not going to happen..."

Slowly I placed the glass back on the bedside table.

"Why?"

"Have you seen what state you have gotten yourself into?"

I frowned as I looked downwards.

_Yes, he was right. At this moment in time I was in no state to do anything, or go anywhere._

"But... Gold..."

I placed my head in my hands, feeling so utterly powerless right now.

_Cyan was out there poisoning Gold and I couldn't do anything!_

"...everything will be fine..." Green assured me, gently placing a hand on my arm in comfort.

_Was he right? Would everything be okay? Right now... I doubted that._

Sighing deeply I closed my eyes and leant against Green's shoulder.

I just had this awful gut wrenching feeling that I would return to Goldenrod only to be hated by the one person who I loved.

_Gold promised me he would wait for me...was he telling the truth?_

"I know you probably feel like the world is against you right now, but trust me...things can only get better. And besides... you have me and Blue on your side"

I glanced at the emerald eyed boy and watched as he smiled at me.

_He was on my side?_

It wasn't a war or anything, yet right now I felt like I had just been in the middle of a battlefield. Still, I guess it was comforting to know some people didn't believe Cyan.

"Thanks... I guess..." I mumbled, now feeling how warm Green was against me.

_Gold used to be warm...he would always see the bright side of any situation and I was always the depressing one...why was Green reminding me of those times?_

"Don't mention it, like I said... you're not that bad a person"

I struggled into a sitting position, moving away from Green.

He watched me the entire time, obviously wondering if I was okay.

I was fine, a little heartbroken but fine nonetheless. This was something I needed to cope with, letting Cyan win was not an option.

"...and if Gold really loves you then... he won't believe Cyan's lies" Green assured me.

My eyes gazed into his as the moonlight shone onto his face, illuminating those perfect features.

_Why was he here for me? Why didn't he just abandon me like everyone else?_

And then I found my heart started to beat a little faster the longer I stared at the older male, wondering just what the hell was going on in my head.

_This was Green, he wasn't Gold... yet why did he make me feel better?_

His hand still rested on my arm, obviously oblivious to it now, but I noticed.

I noticed the coldness of his fingers against my skin, I noticed the alluring stare behind those eyes, and I noticed how hard it was becoming for me to breathe.

"Green..." I muttered quietly, feeling so incredibly weak and afraid right now.

And then I found myself moving closer to the older male.

_I needed this... I wanted to feel... safe._

I closed my eyes, not allowing anything to register in my head right now.

But as I inhaled the scent of strong cologne and felt warm breath on my face I heard Green's Pokegear ring loudly.

I paused, not daring to move an inch or open my eyes as I heard the brunette move to answer his Pokegear.

Deep inside I was kicking myself.

_What the fuck was I doing?! I loved Gold! Why the hell did I try to kiss Green?_

I retreated back to my safety spot on the bed, now allowing my eyes to flicker open.

"Hello? Ah, Blue! Yes, everything is fine stop worrying! Yes... I am sure he would love to see you..."

Right now I felt so ashamed of myself.

_What would I have done if I had kissed him? It would have lead to a lifetime of regret, and not only that... Green was dating Red! It was wrong on so many levels. A moment of weakness... that's all it was..._

"Yeah, you can come over! Alright then, I'll see you in five minutes!"

And the conversation ended.

I sighed as I felt the older male shuffle to place the Pokegear onto the bedside table.

_What the hell was I going to say now? Oh sorry about trying to kiss you... it was a mistake?_

But he didn't question my actions or anything, he stayed quiet, not even daring to look at me.

_What the hell had I done? Even Green hated me now..._

"I'm... sorry..." I mumbled pathetically, wondering if he would suddenly go mental at me, or something.

But he didn't.

He smiled softly.

"It's okay..."

And instead of making myself feel any worse than I already did I decided to pretend to be asleep, so as I settled into the bed and closed my eyes I prayed that Blue would get here soon and rescue me from this dilemma.

* * *

I was awoken by Blue's melodious voice as she bounced over to me.

My eyes flickered open, and I smiled at seeing her kind face.

It seemed like forever since I had seen her.

She sat down beside me and held my hand gently.

"How are you feeling?"

I shrugged, now noticing Green was no longer here.

Maybe he had other things, more important things to do than watch over me.

"I could be better..."

She rubbed my hand as my body ached once again.

_Why did I feel like I was dying? I only passed out, I should be up and on my feet in no time. This was just weird..._

"Do you... still want me to cut your hair?" She asked me with sorrowful blue eyes.

Weakly I nodded, not knowing if I had the energy to stand up.

After everything that had happened today I was more determined than ever to change my appearance, starting with my hair.

"Yes...I do.."

"You want me to do it now? Or when you are feeling better?"

At least Blue had warmed to the idea of seeing me with short hair.

She didn't really have a choice in the matter because even if she was dead against the idea I would still go ahead with it.

I grunted as I shuffled into a sitting position, feeling my hair coil around my shoulder's.

It would feel so strange when that feeling was no longer around.

"Yeah...I may as well get it over with..."

She nodded and stood up.

Then she took both of my hands and helped me out of the bed.

When my feet came into contact with the carpet my legs were still slightly shaky but soon adjusted.

_Maybe I was scared of collapsing again?_

"How much do you want me to cut off?" She asked softly, releasing one of my hands to inspect my hair.

I shrugged, not really caring. As long as it wasn't as wild as Green's then I would be fine.

"Just... do whatever you think will look the best..."

She nodded, and with that said I was lead out of the bedroom, ready for my transformation.

* * *

I would be lying if I said I wasn't shitting bricks right now, and I would be an even bigger liar if I said my heart wasn't pounding in my chest when Blue started to cut off pieces of my hair.

I watched as red coils dropped to the ground, remaining motionless like dead serpents.

Slowly my old life was being replaced with new as I stared at my reflection in the mirror.

My eyes witnessed Blue's creative flair as more and more of my hair fell to the floor. I took a deep breath, wondering if this was really okay?

After this though I would be almost unrecognisable, but that was okay. Maybe that wasn't so bad. It still felt weird not to have hair tickling the back of my neck, I felt exposed for the first time but I would get used to it. I would have to.

Slowly I closed my eyes, feeling Blue's fingers comb through what hair I had left on my head.

_A part of me didn't want to see it, didn't dare open my eyes to see just how short it actually was._

"You look so different with short hair you know?" Blue commented as I felt the cold edge of the scissors press against the side of my face.

I flinched but tried to calm down.

It was okay, I trusted Blue.

"I bet I look terrible..."

I heard her chuckle.

"I wouldn't say that! It makes you look older I think"

_ Did she really think so? _

As her fingers combed through my hair for the last time she stood back and placed her hands on my shoulders.

"You can look now if you want..."

Cautiously I opened my eyes only to witness the massive transformation I had just gone through.

The length around my face was gone, along with the red coils that used to hang down my neck.

It was all gone.

She had managed to cut my hair so it actually was about the same length as Red's hair, but my neck still felt exposed.

Self consciously I placed my hand to my neck, feeling how weird it was to feel skin instead of hair.

"You hate it, don't you?" She murmured quietly.

I took another look at my reflection.

_Okay... maybe it wasn't so bad. So I looked like Red's brother or something with the haircut, but I guess it did make me look older. This was something I could get used to._

"No.. it's... okay" I smiled softly at Blue in my reflection.

It was done now, there was nothing I could do to turn back time, but even though all my hair was gone the horrible reality still remained.

_ Cyan was still out there, poisoning Gold... and I needed to do something about it._

* * *

**_Author's Note: AH! FUCK YOU CYAN! Dx OMG! Why would you do that?! Poor Silv! But maybe things will get better, and he will end up hurting Cyan, like ripping his balls off :) I hoped you enjoyed the intensity and the drama, and please review! :D thanks!_**


	15. Red

**Author's Note: Okay, hello all! This chapter contains hints of Originalshipping, so all you shippers out there this is for you! :) Also, this chapter contains a heavy subject of abuse so anyone who is prone to bad feels I recommend having tissues with you :3 So, enjoy all the drama!**

* * *

**Chapter Fifteen: Red**

It was very nice of Green to let me stay at his for the night. He didn't think I was fit enough to go back to the Pokemon Centre and mentioned about grabbing my rucksack from work in the morning for me.

So, after Blue left to go home I was allowed to lie down in silence in Green's bedroom, giving me enough time to think of something, anything.

_I needed a way to get back at Cyan, to do something about him trying to take Gold away from me. _

Sneasel lay on the bed, looking up at the ceiling in thought as a blanket of darkness shrouded the room.

It must have been midnight and there was no way I could sleep right now, so having some company didn't seem that bad right now. And that was where Sneasel helped. I could just vent, and tell her everything and she would just sit and listen. She was always there for me, and the only thing that was probably constant in my life right now.

Sighing deeply I shuffled amongst the bed covers, feeling very hot right now.

"...what should I do Sneasel? Should I go back to Johto and fight him? Or should I let him win?"

I watched as the ice type sat up and stared at me through worried eyes.

Then she shook her head and folded her clawed limbs.

"Sneeee!" She protested, obviously thinking that we should fight him instead of giving up.

_But... if Gold had sided with him what was worth fighting for?_

I placed my hands behind my head as my eyes stared at the ceiling in thought. As usual she was right, we had to fight this... there was no way I was going to be a sitting duck.

"Yeah... you're right, but if I don't go back soon it might be too late. I need to get back to Johto, and soon..."

_ It was annoying me to death, why did I even do any of this? Why did I break Gold's heart in the first place?! I should have been stubborn as usual and just tried to make things work, but no, instead I broke off the entire relationship._

Sneasel shuffled over to me and settled beside me in the bed. Resting her head against my shoulder I heard her inhale deeply, like she was sighing.

_I wondered if she could feel my pain?_

"...okay... tomorrow... I will go back to Johto tomorrow and no-one is going to stop me"

Turning over so I was facing my ice type I felt her nestle in my arms as she prepared to sleep. I watched her for a while before I started to feel drowsy and somehow managed to end up dosing off.

* * *

_I woke up to the sound of crying, and the noise echoed throughout the emptiness. Cautiously I scanned my surroundings discovering that this time I was being blinded by a bright light that seemed to reflect off the white walls that surrounded me. _

_Was this a dream again? But still... who was crying? _

_I stood up straight and once again tried to find the source of the noise, but I just couldn't see anything. _

_Maybe it was all in my head, or just a figment of my imagination? _

_Then the white walls morphed into the old familiar scene of my bedroom when I was a kid. It looked exactly the same, the same wallpaper, the same curtains... and as I looked towards my bed I noticed a younger version of myself lying face down, crying loudly. _

_I swallowed hard. _

_Why was I crying? And why was I seeing my younger self in my dream? _

_Slowly I walked closer to get a better view and noticed that there were visible marks of abuse scattered all over my younger self's body. _

_My eyes widened. _

_No... I wasn't dreaming of that... of the times my father... NO!_

_I placed a hand to my head as the sounds of my crying haunted my ears, causing my heart to thunder inside my chest. All the pain and torment I received back then came flooding into my veins, making my whole body shudder in horror. _

_Why...? Why did I have to witness this...?_

_ "Silver! Silver! You better not be sleeping!" I heard the horrendous booming voice of my father approaching from nearby and I could not stop my body from trembling. _

_No...not this...you have got to be joking! _

_I watched as my younger version screamed helplessly into the pillows, hands fisted desperately into the bedsheets, and as the door to my bedroom opened my heart seemed to just die inside my chest. _

_There he stood, large as life._

_ My father..._

_I couldn't move, I just became paralysed as I watched the tall man approach the small body of my younger self, so helpless... so afraid._

_ And I couldn't do anything..._

_ "Stop crying you fucking girl! If you keep screaming like that I'll change your name to Silvia! And you would love that wouldn't you...?" _

_That name... it made me shudder. _

_Silvia...why? Why did he call me that?! My name was Silver! Why did he keep calling me a girl's name?! _

_I watched as he neared the younger version of myself and hissed into his ear;_

_ "Silvia..." _

_I swallowed hard, really longing to do something, anything to get out of this situation, but it was hopeless. But deep inside I knew what was coming now, I knew how it felt to be abused, and I certainly didn't want to watch it. _

_So desperately I turned away only to be met by the haunting deafening screams from myself as something monstrous happened. Something that my father would be definitely going to hell for. _

_I closed my eyes, trying to ignore the horrible wailing sounds, the sounds of abuse ringing throughout my head__. _

_Make it stop! Make it go away! _

_I bit my lip hard as my fingers dug harder into my head, trying to make myself wake up._

_ Wake up!_

_And as the wails turned into soft sobs I felt something sticky on the back of my pants. _

_Turning to look at my reflection in the mirror just before me I noticed that the back of my pants were stained with blood, fresh blood that trickled down my legs and caused my heart to literally break in two._

_ No...this...this was not happening! _

_In horror I watched as the stained garment got redder and redder as time lingered on, the longer my father abused my younger self. _

_Finally having the strength to close my eyes I couldn't help but just scream hopelessly;_

_ "NOOOOOOOO STOPPPPP!"_

* * *

I jolted awake only to feel something warm pressing against my cheek. Slowly opening my eyes I could barely make out a silhouette in the dim light.

Then the pressure seemed soft, as if it were fingers dancing over my skin.

And that was exactly what it was.

"...are you okay?"

The voice was soft in my ears, and instantly I relaxed against the touch. It was Green and once again he was here.

Closing my eyes I inhaled deeply.

_Thank goodness that wasn't real..._

"...nightmare again..." I mumbled sleepily, hating how every night I would be plagued by my inner demons and they just refused to go away.

I heard Green sigh as his fingers lingered on my face.

"Do you know why you keep suffering from nightmares?"

I shook my head weakly, not really wanting to go into detail about the real reasons. I would never be able to have a decent night's sleep, not after what I had been through. Things like that were just make believe now, and I had just accepted it.

"Also... why did you cut your hair?" Green sounded disappointed, but I didn't know why.

It was my decision to cut my hair off, no-one else's, and besides it shouldn't affect anyone else but me.

"...wanted a change..." I mumbled, now feeling Sneasel shuffle uncomfortably in my arms as she continued to sleep soundly.

My eyes were now getting adjusted to the poor lighting and noticed that Green must have been woken up by my screaming again or something. His eyes looked tired and he was wearing an old t-shirt with baggy tracksuit bottoms.

Obviously his nightwear.

"Look... I have been thinking..." Green mused softly, now removing his hand from my face as he looked thoughtful.

I watched him, as I felt Sneasel's soft rise and fall of her chest while she slept soundly.

"About what?"

"About that Cyan guy...I mean, he is dangerous right?"

_Dangerous was an understatement right now. He was warped, mentally disturbed... evil..._

"...the worst kind..."

Green nodded, placing a hand to his chin.

"Red works with him, I don't like the fact he is working with some crazy psychopath...so tomorrow I am going to Johto to do something about it"

I sat up slightly in Green's bed, careful not to wake up the sleeping ice type.

_Did I hear that right? Green was going to go back to Johto to sort out Cyan? Was that even safe?_

"...you're going to Johto?"

He nodded.

"Yes, I need to make sure that he doesn't harm Red, which he probably would if he knew you were friend's with him..."

_That was a fair point, no-one was safe right now, especially if they knew me or were close to me. Lucky for me Blue was safe here in Kanto._

_ I frowned, not liking the idea of Cyan actually hurting Red. I know Red was boring but he wasn't a horrible person._

"...then I shall come too" I stated, knowing this was the perfect opportunity to make sure Gold was safe and sound.

Green smiled softly, obviously he knew I would say that.

"I was expecting you to say that, but we will have to leave tonight after work..."

I rubbed my eyes, now wondering what time it was. Probably the early hours of the morning as that was when my terrible nightmares happened.

I nodded, feeling a little better knowing soon I would be reunited with the one person who I loved more than life itself, and that Cyan's evil antics would soon be stopped.

"Okay, does Blue know about this?"

Green shook his head.

"No, if she did then she might risk putting herself in danger for you... you know how much she cares about you. So, that is why we can't tell her anything, other than you and I are going away for a few days to a meeting..."

Now I felt really bad about lying to Blue, but Green was right.

I needed to make sure she stayed in Kanto so then Cyan couldn't get to her. If that meant telling a little white lie then so be it.

I nodded weakly, trying to remember the excuse.

_We were going to a meeting... shouldn't be too hard to remember..._

"As much as I don't want to lie to Blue... I will just so she stays safe...I don't want to risk her getting hurt for me"

Green nodded determinedly.

"Exactly, and besides... Red is the champion so if Cyan did do anything right now he could probably hold his own until we got there. I shall give him a call later and tell him our plans..."

A small smile scarred my lips as I thought about how much Green obviously cared about Red.

_He was just going to drop all of his responsibilities here to ensure the love of his life stayed safe, so why shouldn't I do the same?_

"Sure... by the way what time is it?" I mumbled, feeling Sneasel shuffle in my arms as she was waking talking probably disturbed her.

Green squinted at his wristwatch for a while before answering;

"It's 4am, so if you want to sleep for a bit longer then you are more than welcome to, but I am going to sort out the plans for later..."

I watched as the brunette stood up tall, and smiled at me before turning to leave the room.

So that was settled, today was going to be the day that Cyan had his punishment, and if Green got hold of him he definitely would be punished.

Sneasel opened her large eyes sleepily and looked at me expectantly.

I smiled at her and gently patted her head.

"It's all sorted... we are going back to Johto tonight!"

"Sneeee~!" She beamed happily before snuggling into my arms once again.

Deep inside I wondered if this would end favourably for any of us.

_Would Cyan purposely hurt the people I was close to just because his brother was suffering? Would Cyan kill anyone I loved just to watch me break down? _

_I_ sighed heavily.

The answer to all those questions was obviously a yes.

* * *

When it was 7am in the morning I decided to make a move and get ready to go to work.

Sadly I only had one pair of clothes and I was wearing them, so I needed to borrow something of Green's, if just for today. But Green's clothes were all oversized and showed far too much skin.

In this heat that was not going to happen, so after a lot of rummaging through the wardrobe I managed to find a black t-shirt that he must have worn years ago, because it was the smallest garment I could find.

But it would do for now.

I also had to borrow a pair of black trousers which were far too baggy for me, but it would be okay for today. Once I got my rucksack back then I could change into my own clothes, but they were still at the shop.

I readjusted the t-shirt on my shoulders as I looked at my reflection in the mirror, remembering that dream so vividly.

"Sneeeee!" Sneasel beamed happily, bouncing slightly on the bed.

She must have been excited to be going back to Johto today, after all it was where she was born so it was only natural.

I sighed at my reflection, secretly happy that my eyes did not detect any red blood stains on the trousers.

_Thank goodness..._

Then my eyes diverted to my now shorter hairstyle.

It still looked weird, but something I would get used to. Self consciously I ran my fingers through it, missing how it no longer tickled the back of my neck. But, it would always grow back so my short hair was the least of my worries right now.

My main concern was getting to work and then going to Johto in the evening.

_It felt like years since I had last seen Gold's face, and I missed him so much. _

"Right... it's time to go..." I murmured to Sneasel, who knew what that meant.

She happily obliged and allowed me to return her to her Pokeball. As I held the red and white ball in my hands I wondered if she knew all of what I was going through, could she feel all my pain and suffering?

Sighing softly I placed the ball on my belt and left Green's bedroom.

* * *

As I wondered down the stairs Green was waiting at the front door for me, dressed in his formal black attire. His eyes shot a confused glance at me for a moment, like he was wondering where I got the clothes from.

_Maybe I should have asked to borrow them first?_

"Are those... my clothes?" Green asked, trying to suppress a chuckle.

I nodded weakly, now feeling very self conscious.

"...All my clothes are in my rucksack at work... sorry...maybe I should have asked to borrow them..."

Then the emerald eyed boy chuckled, obviously finding the look on my face amusing.

"No.. no... it's fine. In fact... it kind of suits you in a weird and wonderful way..."

I raised an eyebrow at the taller male, wondering if he was trying to be funny about this, but I decided against arguing. Right now he had been one of the people to actually support me, and be on my side.

Slipping my shoes on I watched as Green opened his front door and let me walk out into the warm summer air.

_Right now it wasn't that hot because it was early morning, but give it a few hours and my skin would probably be burning. _

I waited for Green to lock his front door before we started our walk towards work.

I didn't even know where we were, but the scenery was beautiful.

Tall blossoming trees decorated either side of the road and melodious bird Pokemon could be heard singing loudly in the treetops. The sky was devoid of clouds giving it this lovely ocean blue colouring. It really was a nice crisp summer day.

"...so are you going to try to work things out with Gold?" Green asked me as we walked down the road to God knows where.

I shrugged weakly, not even knowing if Gold would even want to talk to me, let alone get back with me.

"I have no idea... he might not want anything to do with me..."

"That's rubbish and you know it. Gold loves the bones of you, and from what I can gather he won't be pulled into believing Cyan's lies about you"

I smiled softly, thankful that Green was trying to make me feel better and give me a small flash of hope.

He could be right, Gold knew me better than anyone and he would know that rape was one of the things I was not capable of.

_Well... I hoped he knew that._

"I hope so... I don't know what I would do if he hated me..."

I kicked a stone into the gutter in annoyance.

I would kill Cyan for this, for trying to ruin my life. He would rue his decision to mess with me, I would make sure of it.

"From what I know about Gold I don't think he is capable of hating anyone, he is far too careless and laid back to feel hate towards anyone. He might be hurt, or upset... but he wouldn't hate you"

I glanced at Green, watching how his perfect face morphed into a wide smile.

_Yes, he was right. Gold was all of those things...stupid...reckless...carefree...__loving...laid back... but not horrible. But still, I couldn't help but worry about it._

"..Yeah, maybe you're right..."

"Of course I am! Since when am I ever wrong?" He joked, raising an eyebrow at me.

I nudged his arm playfully as we walked. It was nice to actually be able to talk about my problems for once, usually it was the hardest thing in the world for me.

_Maybe I was learning to open up to people?_

* * *

After a while I noticed we were walking through the middle of Saffron City.

It was so different from yesterday, there were hardly any people about and it was calm and peaceful. Probably because it was early in the morning and no-one was awake yet, apart from Green and I, but we were stupid.

It was nice to finally be able to appreciate the city in it's glory without the fast paced environment that went with it.

"Remember... not a word to Blue about what we are doing, okay?" Green reminded me, and I nodded.

_Yes I knew that, I didn't want her following me to Johto and risking herself getting hurt in the crossfire._

"I know... I know..."

"She will understand when the time comes, and after all this is over then maybe we can explain why we lied to her..."

I didn't want to imagine how furious the brunette would be, but still this was for her own good.

Cyan was already hurting enough people without adding her to the list as well.

"I'll let you explain... considering she will probably kick your ass..."

I smirked, and Green chuckled.

Seemed like we both knew Blue too well.

"Yeah, you're right...but I would rather she kick my ass for protecting her than have a guilty conscience because something bad happened to her"

And that was also a valid point, I could never forgive myself if that occurred, and Cyan would be a dead man.

As both Green and I walked past an electrical store there was a television in the window that was showing the news.

Some how it intrigued me and so I came to standstill, watching the authoritative man read out the news bulletin.

_"A ten year old boy committed suicide today in the region of Johto...apparently sources believe it was down to bullies who pushed the boy to end his life. Reporter Violet Winters is at the scene... Violet, how is it back there?"_

My heart stopped in my chest as I watched the dark haired girl who took a photo of Gold and I standing right outside Cyan's grandparent's house, and all around it was yellow tape, like it was a crime scene.

Green came and stood behind me as I listened to Violet's voice;

_"Hello, yes...this is a tragedy...apparently the ten year old had been suffering from depression, and that was what caused him to end his life. The whole family is torn apart and none of them can understand why such a sweet boy would want to do this. The police are looking into the cause of the young boy's death, and many people believe it was down to bullying. Bullying is a terrible crime which needs to be stopped..." _

I zoned out from hearing her voice as my legs trembled underneath my body weight.

_No... this was not happening!_

_ Cyan's brother... he killed himself...? SHIT SHIT SHIT!_

"Silver...? Are you feeling okay?" Green asked, his voice laced with concern.

Slowly in horror I shook my head.

_Oh fuck! Gold was in trouble now!_

"No... that kid...who killed himself... it's Cyan's brother!"

Green's face morphed into horror, obviously understanding why I was worked up over it.

"He was the kid who I told to stop being a Pokemon trainer because he sucked... I never knew it would lead to this!" I cried out, wanting to literally punch the television screen.

Green's face expressed the worry that coursed through my veins.

_Now, the danger was more imminent than before! _

_Cyan promised me... if his brother died... he would __destroy everything I loved! _

_Gold..._

"Oh shit! We better get to work... and fast! I need to call Red!" Green said desperately, grabbing my wrist with force and pulling me away from the television.

And we ran to Celadon, and we didn't stop.

This must have happened this morning, so we still had time to do something about it. We just needed to call Red and find out if he was okay, and if Gold was safe.

That was the one thing I was most concerned about right now.

* * *

When we finally got to the department store Blue was already there, making sure all the displays looked pretty.

Little did she know that major drama was about to unfold in our lives, and it was all down to my stupid actions.

_If only I had kept my mouth shut and not taunted that brat then he wouldn't have killed himself, and Cyan would not be on the warpath trying to destroy me._

Blue raised her eyes to Green and I, smiling wildly, only that smile soon disappeared when Green rushed behind the counter to grab the telephone.

"Green?! What the hell is going on?!" She cursed in annoyance, probably because he hadn't even said good morning to her.

I leant on the counter, watching Green dial Goldenrod Department Store's number furiously. He waited for a few moments and slammed the phone down in rage.

"It's busy for some reason... I'll have to keep trying..."

And as Green continued to dial the number Blue just turned to me.

"Why is Green being so... I don't know... desperate?"

_I couldn't tell her the real reasons could I? Green had told me to make up something, anything so Blue wouldn't be involved._

And as bad as I felt I knew I had to do it.

"...something between him and Red... it's best not to get involved..."

That was the best thing I could come up with, but Blue believed me straight away.

"Oh, are they having another love spat? Seriously, those two need to just be locked in a closet and release all their sexual frustrations all at once..."

There was silence as Green stared at Blue in annoyance, obviously displeased with her fan girl moments.

She waved him off like she was kidding about it, but I knew that deep down she wasn't.

Green rolled his eyes and continued trying to ring Red, but there was no answer.

Now I was starting to worry.

_What if Cyan had got to him first?_

"...I think you should keep your fantasies to yourself next time..." I murmured, just loud enough for Blue to hear.

She giggled loudly.

"Who said I fantasize about that?"

"Well... who would want to think about Green and Red in a closet fucking?" I remarked.

"Can we PLEASE not have this conversation right now?!" Green asked desperately, making both myself and Blue nod weakly.

_Why were we even on this topic? I didn't want to think of Red and Green doing the nasty! I mean it was Red! Did he even know how to do that?! _

_Shit... thinking about it again._

"...God... he is so touchy today..." Blue groaned about her superior, sighing as she leant on the counter.

I nodded, not having the heart to confess the real reasons for his behaviour. He was worried over Red, it was natural to be snappy.

"Hey Blue... can you do me a favour and go to the corner shop for me?" I asked, trying to think of something to get her out of the picture in case the conversation with Red happened soon.

Blue blinked curiously at me.

"What for...?"

_Now, what would make Blue leave? _

_Oh... was I really going to ask her to get me... those?"_

"...ummm...can buy me some... condoms?"

"WHAT?!" Blue screamed out, causing Green to groan in annoyance.

Of course it was a lie, but if she knew that I needed them for something then she probably would leave. It was worth a shot.

"You heard me..."

"Why do you need condoms?!"

I rolled my eyes, wondering why she even asked that stupid question.

It took a few seconds before the penny dropped.

"OH!"

"Well... can you?" I asked again, watching the older girl giggle to herself, probably enjoying all the pleasing images running riot in her warped mind.

But still, that wasn't of importance right now.

"I certainly can! I can't allow my Silver to go around having unprotected sex!"

I placed a hand to my head in annoyance.

_Why did she have to go and tell everyone? But still, it seemed my plan was working. _

I watched as the brunette slipped from behind the counter, giving me a coy smile as she walked towards the elevator, obviously brooding on those images for a while.

Sighing heavily I leant on the counter, wondering how I had the energy to lie like that to her face?

Then I heard Green's voice;

"Red...? Red..! Thank goodness you answered!"

I raised my head, listening to the conversation as best as I could.

"...what? Yes I am fine! This is not about me! Red... are you okay there, like has anything happened?"

I waited, praying and hoping that he was okay, and that Cyan had not decided to target him to get to me. Watching Green's face contort into a variety of emotions was actually fascinating.

"...I see... what, you want to talk to Silver...? Oh yeah, he is here... I'll put him on..."

_Why did he want to talk to me?_

I slowly walked behind the counter, watching as Green held the receiver out to me.

"He wants to talk to you... I don't know why..."

I frowned, remembering the last telephone conversation Red and I had, and how incredibly boring it was. But still, this was a serious matter this time.

"Hello...?" I asked cautiously, feeling Green's eyes burn into the back of my head.

"Silver...I needed to ask you something... are you actually going to come back to Goldenrod?"

I held the receiver tightly in my hands as I cleared my throat;

"Yes... why do you ask?"

"...I just wondered. Cyan keeps asking me if you are going to come back... and he told me that I actually shouldn't talk to you or anything because you sexually abused him, or something..."

I rolled my eyes.

_Did Red seriously believe I was capable of doing that? _

I placed a hand to my head;

"I didn't touch him... I swear I didn't"

"I don't care if you did, or if you didn't I just needed to know if you were coming back to work. Gold keeps coming in...and asking about you... and I kind of feel bad for him. Cyan's been talking to him a lot lately... I was just wondering if you were coming back to try to sort things out..."

_So Cyan had been talking to Gold in my absence, but Gold had still been coming to the department store? Did that mean... he still loved me? _

I swallowed hard, moving uncomfortably on my heels.

"Yes... I am coming back very soon..."

There was a pause.

"Good...you need to be careful though..."

_Did Red know how warped Cyan was in the head? And I knew I had to be careful, I wasn't stupid. _

Cyan would not get away with this though.

"...I know.. I'll be okay..."

"Yeah, no doubt. Also, can you tell me why is Green so worried over me?"

I turned to look at the taller male, seeing a sadness in his eyes. It made me feel sad too, and that was probably because he loved Red so much and I knew what that felt like.

_I knew what it felt like to hurt so deep down in the core of your soul... so it felt like your whole world was tearing at the seams._

"He thinks... Cyan might hurt you..."

"Why would Cyan do that?"

I didn't have the heart to tell him everything, how all this mess was my fault, that if I had just kept my mouth shut then this whole fiasco could have been avoided.

Instead I decided on saying something a bit less intimidating.

"...he thinks Cyan might hurt you because... he is messed up in the head..."

There was a pause, obviously Red was thinking about something.

"Cyan has been fine since you left... it's like a big weight has been lifted off his shoulders, although I do not like how he has been hanging around Gold, like he is trying to replace you or something..."

I clenched my hand into a fist in annoyance.

_How dare that prick try and make a move on my Gold! I would definitely teach him a lesson for that!_

I closed my eyes briefly, trying to stay calm.

"...he won't be fine when I get back... I can promise that..."

"I think you should stay away from him.. especially if he has told everyone you sexually abused him... he could go to the police or anything with an accusation like that. It's best you keep away from him..."

I frowned in annoyance.

_Damn Cyan and his malicious lies! So he wasn't making it up to get to me, he even told Red! So he must have told Gold... and Crystal too if he saw her. But would any of them believe him over me? I hoped not._

"...You need to be careful too..." I warned.

There was an uncomfortable silence on the other end of the phone.

"...I really don't understand why you think Cyan would hurt me..."

I rolled my eyes, not believing how dense Red was being.

_Did he know he was working with a mentally unstable person?! Maybe I should tell him that Cyan was after me... and that if Red was seen speaking to me he could be in the firing line?_

"...Cyan is after me, he wants to destroy everything that I love, and the people I know... that is why Green and I think you aren't safe there..."

I heard Red inhale deeply, like he was genuinely shocked about what I just said.

My eyes flickered over to Green who continued to watch me talk to his one true love.

"...shit, sounds pretty bad..."

"Yes! That is why you need to do something about him! Get him fired or something, or leave the shop for the day. Green and I are coming back tonight to sort this out..."

I couldn't believe I was asking Red to leave the shop for his own safety.

Once upon a time I couldn't care less if he randomly exploded in front of me, but ever since I knew Green I didn't feel annoyed at him any more.

"Okay... I'll do that...I'll phone Officer Jenny as well and tell her-"

Suddenly Red's voice was cut off by a loud bang and then the sound of something crashing.

My heart beat quickened it's pace until it was literally ringing in my ears.

_What the hell just happened?!_

"Are you still there...Red?!" I called out, wondering if the phone line went dead.

But it didn't.

I didn't hear anything, just silence.

And now I was starting to panic.

"...RED?!" I cried out, knowing that Green would probably be going mental right about now.

But so was I.

_Had Cyan done something to him?! _

My hand's started to tremble as I slowly removed the receiver from my ear, widened eyes facing towards the tall brunette.

Shakily I managed to choke out;

"R-Red... he...he's not talking any more..."

"WHAT?!"

Green quickly snatched the phone from my fingers and tried his best to get something out of the Champion. But every time he shouted his name into the receiver he received nothing back, and I just watched his face crumble right in front of me.

_This... this was all my fault... And now we needed to go to Johto now! If Red had been hurt we needed to get back, because it would only be a matter of time before Cyan targeted everyone else too. _

Green angrily threw the phone on the floor before pacing up and down, running his hands through his hair.

"...what the hell are we going to do?!"

My heart was still pounding in my chest, creating this nauseating feeling to consume me.

"I don't know... we need to get back to Johto and soon!"

Green stood still, as his hands fell to his sides.

They clenched into fists in anger, obviously he wanted to hurt something right now, and I knew how that felt.

_If Cyan had hurt Gold... he was a dead man._

"Right, scrap the old plan... we have to tell Blue what the fuck is going on! She needs to be aware of this fucking psychopath! She needs to know that he will hurt everyone you know!"

I frowned at the thought but nodded anyway.

He was right, she needed to be aware of the enemy she was up against.

_How could you fight something you didn't know about?_

"...Yes you are right..."

"And when she comes back we will leave right away... I need to find out if Red is okay... I swear... if that bastard has hurt him I WILL KILL HIM!"

I had never seen Green so angry before, and to be honest it was something I didn't like. He actually seemed like he had blood lust in his eyes, like killing Cyan was top on his bucket list.

Not that I cared, that was something that a lot of people desired right now.

* * *

My ears detected the sound of the elevator doors opening and as my eyes diverted towards the direction I noticed Blue walking towards us with a carrier bag, wearing a wide smile.

Deep inside it felt like I was decaying, slowly turning into something that was no longer human.

_How was I supposed to tell Blue that she was in danger because of me?!_

"That didn't take long..." I managed to choke out, forcing a smile to scar my face as she walked up to the counter.

"I'm a girl... we don't take forever to find things like this"

I raised an eyebrow at her.

_Was she trying to say that because I was a guy I was incompetent?_

Not that it mattered right now, I just needed to try to explain this situation without making her freak out.

Green had stopped pacing up and down and had now sat himself on the kick stool, head in his hands.

"...Blue..." I tried, before I was brutally cut off.

"I bought you the best one's I could find... oh! And I also bought you this!"

I watched as the blue eyed girl held up a black silk blind fold, and for that moment all I could think of was _'why the fuck did she buy this?!'_

"...a blindfold?" I managed to mumble, watching as Blue eyed the garment in her hands.

She giggled playfully.

"Of course!"

"And... why did you buy that?"

The brunette sighed, like she expected me to know all the warped things that ravaged her mind. Luckily for me I was spared any details.

"Think about it Silver! You and Gold have a lot of making up to do! And I mean A LOT! So... what better way to spice up your sex life but with this?"

_Did she really just say that? Like seriously? _

_We were worried to death over Red... and if he was actually still alive... and Blue was talking about me using a blindfold to spice up my sex life?!_

"...Blue...I need to talk to you about something..." I swallowed hard as the taller girl placed the item back into the plastic bag.

Large azure eyes gazed into my own.

"Yes?"

I looked away briefly, wondering how to exactly tell her this.

_Should I just be honest?_

"...you know Cyan... the guy who is trying to destroy me because I hurt his little brother?"

Blue nodded, and listened to me intently.

Taking a deep breath I decided I had to do this, she needed to know just what was happening.

"...his brother committed suicide today..."

My eyes flickered up to her face, watching as she gasped in shock.

_Maybe she already knew that we were all in trouble?_

"Oh no! Does that mean you will be in trouble or something?"

As I was about to explain, Green piped up instead.

"...Cyan wants to destroy everything and everyone Silver is close to, or is friend's with. We think... Cyan has targeted Red first..."

I flinched mentally, not enjoying the images that flooded my mind.

If Red was preoccupied with talking to me Cyan could easily have used a weapon or something on the Champion.

_God... why was this even happening?! _

Blue's face appeared crestfallen as the information started to sink in.

"...Oh no... Red...what are we going to do?!"

I glanced at Green, watching as he stood up, a look of determination scarring those perfect features.

"Silver and I are going back to Johto to sort Cyan out, if he has hurt Red... he is a dead man!"

"...but you need to stay here!" I managed to add in, making Blue's eyes sparkle in sadness.

She must have known this could be serious, especially considering we didn't know how dangerous Cyan was.

_Lately all he was capable of was malicious lies and deceit... but what if he was capable of murder? That I could not handle. _

"….I see...but what about you?! I don't want you getting hurt! Either of you!"

Both Green and I knew Blue would behave like this, but this was for her own good. Getting involved in this scenario only meant trouble, and that was something she needed to stay away from.

"Blue you have to do as we say and stay here in Kanto. We don't know what Cyan will do to any of the people Silver is close to... it's for your own safety..." Green issued softly, his face contorting to a sad frown.

And as those words passed his lips my mind immediately thought about Gold.

_Cyan had been talking to him a lot lately, so what if he had got to him first? What if Cyan... had killed him?! _

My heart quickened it's pace in my chest as a horrible sickening taste flooded my mouth.

_No...he couldn't hurt Gold... I wouldn't let him!_

"...okay...I'll stay here, but you have to call me and tell me everything that happens! I need to know you two are safe!"

Right now my mind had wondered, drifted away from Green and Blue, and the fact I was in Kanto.

_I thought about the better times, to times when Crystal, Gold and I used to hang out together, even if most of the time I was annoyed or angry at Gold's jokes... I missed those times. A part of me wondered if I would ever go back to that feeling, the feeling of being carefree... and even happy._

"...But we have to leave right now, so can you hold the fort at work while Silver and I leave? We have to make sure Red is okay, and check up on Gold too..."

Green's voice lingered in my ears as I slowly started to return to reality.

_To Blue standing by the counter, her face pained with worry... to Green looking confident and determined... and finally to this horrible gut wrenching feeling that had consumed me._

"Yes, Yes! I understand! You better be quick then! The Magnet Train leaves Saffron City in ten minutes!"

Snapping out of any trance I might have been in I swiftly snatched my rucksack from behind the counter, ready for our journey back to Johto. Green nodded obediently.

We still had enough time if we made a run for it.

"I promise to give you a call when we are in Johto..."

Green and I slipped from behind the counter, allowing the short haired girl to take our places. I watched as the taller male gave her a hug and then waited so I could do it myself.

As her slender feminine arms embraced me I heard her chest heave painfully.

_Was she crying?_

"You better be careful! If you do anything stupid... I'll kill you myself!"

I smiled sadly, not actually wanting to let her go. This was all my fault, so I needed to make things right again.

"I promise..."

"Come on then, we don't have much time!" Green called out to me, and with one final squeeze I released the blue eyed girl, watching as she wiped her face quickly.

Forcing a smile she replied;

"Well, get going then before I change my mind!"

Readjusting the rucksack on my back I nodded, trying so hard not to break down in front of her, but I could always come back after all this was over.

And with one final wave of my hand Green and I ran towards the elevator, preparing ourselves for whatever awaited us back in Johto.

* * *

**Author's Note: Awwww! No! RED! D: Is he okay, did Cyan actually hurt him? Well.. you will have to wait and see ;) Please read and review, it makes me a very happy girl :3 See you next chapter!**


	16. Missing You part one

**Author's Note: Ah, it's my 21st birthday in two days! :D I know that was random. Anyway, this chapter is quite long and sort of comes in two parts. This is part one so please enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter Sixteen: Missing You**

Luckily Green and I managed to get to the station with only two minutes to spare. The time on the large clock read 8:30am, too damn early for me. But that wasn't the most important thing to worry about right now.

_Was Red okay back in Goldenrod? What if Cyan had really hurt him or something?_

There was no way Green would let him get away with it, and it would probably destroy him entirely. So as my eyes watched the magnet train pull into the station a heavy sigh escaped my lips. Right now I felt so sorry for the emerald eyed boy, he would soon feel all the torment and anguish that had recently been inhabiting my body, he would soon feel the heartbreaking pain of watching the one person he loved break right in front of his eyes. Being so utterly powerless was the ultimate weakness to both myself, and him.

My eyes flickered across to his face, which was pained with both uncertainty and anger.

_I hated that look, and I had seen it way too much in my life. The look of sadness, anxiety and anguish... all rolled into one. It just didn't seem to look right on Green's face._

"...well... there's no turning back now" He mumbled, forcing a smile at me.

I nodded weakly, watching as the train came to a stand still and the large doors opened. Luckily for us not a lot of people were travelling back to Johto today so we would probably be able to sit down for the journey,

"I hope Red will be okay..." I thought out loud, watching Green's face wince at the horrible mental images that must have been swimming through his mind.

"...me too..."

And with that said the both of us boarded the train, ready for our long journey back to Johto.

Green and I managed to sit together once again, which was good in my opinion. He was already feeling a little delicate so maybe having me here was a good thing this time.

_Even so... this horrible feeling continued to haunt me, devouring my soul slowly with every passing second. What if the worst had happened... what if Red had been killed by Cyan? What then? Did he even have that evil corrupt gene in his body? Well... right now that was definitely debatable. If he could have got to me I would have died a thousand times over..._

Green sighed as he rested his head back against the chair, eyes watching the scenery of Kanto pass us by.

"...are you okay?" I asked, as I placed my rucksack on the floor in-between my feet, wondering if that was the right thing to ask at this precise moment in time. I watched as he shrugged weakly.

"I will be once I know what has happened... I don't think I could cope if...he was hurt..."

I frowned and stared at my hands that lay in my lap. Slowly I started to fidget as my mind began to wonder about other things.

_If Cyan had hurt Red then he was definitely capable of hurting Gold too, but was it already too late?_

I shook that thought from my mind immediately. Inside I knew Gold was tough, he had to be. Battling constantly throughout his childhood certainly didn't make him weak, in fact underneath all those stupid smiles and terrible jokes lay a willpower of stone.

"I know...but if Cyan has done something to him he won't get away with it..." I consoled.

Green turned to face me, and smiled weakly.

"...but of course, I will kill the bastard...and I know plenty of other people would want to as well"

I nodded, knowing that people would be queuing from far and wide to take part in that heinous crime. Not that I cared, some-one as warped and as twisted as he was needed to be stopped.

Sighing softly I rested my head against Green's shoulder, not just for his support but for my own. The confrontation that I would receive from Cyan wasn't something I was going to enjoy, but it was something that had to be done.

"I mean... come on! Everyone has family problems... there is really no need to start lashing out and hurting other people" Green groaned, obviously annoyed with the whole scenario.

I couldn't really agree with him on this considering I had worse family problems than Cyan and Green put together.

_They had no idea what it was like to grow up in an abusive household, to want to tell some-one about it and just being unable to even speak. And I did lash out at people, on a daily basis. Growing up it was Gold who received the brunt of my attacks, just because he was always there...annoying me... pestering me... or just being there for me. And I hated it. In my head I had often thought why would some-one like him want to be there for some-one like me? I didn't deserve his friendship, or anything he had to offer, so time after time I would push him away...but he would always come running back. _

I sighed heavily, closing my eyes briefly.

_What if this time he wouldn't run back to me? What if...he stayed away?_

"Silver...? Are you okay?" Green said softly, nudging my arm gently. My eyes flickered open and I weakly nodded.

"...yeah...I guess"

"I know you are worried about Gold, but don't worry too much. I am sure everything will be fine"

_How did he have that much faith in Cyan?! Right now I was sure he had kidnapped everyone I knew and would be holding them to ransom or something._

Placing a hand to my head I grimaced.

_Damn... stupid mind overloading..._

"...and what if it isn't?"

"Then Cyan will go to prison...do you really think he will get away with any of this?"

I raised my eyes to Green, seeing that look in his eyes, the look of confidence and determination. I had to believe him, to believe in his words even if there was a possibility it could all be a lie. Right now, any shred of faith was something to cling onto.

"Green..." I murmured quietly, feeling the taller boy shuffle slightly. I sighed heavily, feeling this horrible weight pressing down on my heart, suffocating it.

"Yes?"

"...how close are you and Red?"

Resting my head against his shoulder I heard the older male cough slightly.

"I have known him most of my life...so yeah, I'd say we are very close..."

Closing my eyes I took a deep breath, wondering if Green was hurting more than I was right now.

_Did he have more of a connection with Red? Was it like trying to breathe without oxygen?_

"...have you always loved him?" I asked, not even knowing why. It wasn't like I was genuinely interested, maybe I just wanted some aimless conversation to pass the time?

_Either that or I wanted to fall asleep..._

I heard him chuckle.

"No, in fact at one point I really disliked him..."

My eyes opened at his words.

_He disliked Red? So, it wasn't a great relationship from the start then...not like how I had seen it. How strange...maybe Green was more like me than I ever thought?_

"...why did you dislike him?"

"It was mainly petty rivalry really, he was always trying to be one step ahead of me and... it just pissed me off, but after he finally became the Champion I guess it didn't annoy me any more, in fact I sort of respected him. Then I turned my attention to wondering why I kept thinking about him... and worrying over him when he was stuck up Mt Silver for month's on end. I guess slowly it dawned on me that I actually liked him..."

Listening to Green foretell his past was actually soothing and at this precise moment in time I felt like I could fall asleep at the drop of a hat, and maybe those nightmares wouldn't harass my mind.

_Maybe... And the warmth of his body was lulling me into a false sense of security...causing my eyes to get heavy._

"...so that is how it all started. I guess no relationship is perfect, even now Red and I have our arguments and love spats... but we always work through them because.. that's what you do if you love each other..."

_Yes... he was right. If things get tough you can work through them if you love each other! So, no matter what Cyan did to me, or Gold we would always be okay._

I smiled to myself, inhaling the lingering scent of Green's cologne.

"Yeah..." I mumbled, feeling the soft humming of the train and the subtle warmth of the older boy. Right now I was so relaxed it was something that was alien to me.

_Was it because I knew I was going to see Gold again? Or was it because of the words Green had said?_

"Am I really that boring?" Green stated, nudging me into opening my eyes. Weakly I shook my head, feeling very tired all of a sudden.

"No... I'm just relaxed I guess..."

"...you don't have to spare my feelings Silver, hell I'd probably bore myself with half the things that come out of my mouth"

He chuckled softly and I couldn't help but smirk slightly. Even so, right now I felt like there was actually light at the end of this tunnel, that there would be an end to all this pain and torment. That Cyan would be stopped, one way or another.

"So... you know about Red and I, why don't you tell me about you and Gold?"

My eyes widened as I felt myself struggle into a sitting position. I didn't want to talk about it, to anyone. It was private, all my emotions and feelings towards Gold were all sealed away deep inside me, there was no way I would spill them out for Green to see.

"...I don't want to talk about it..."

I started to fidget with my hands in my lap, trying to ignore Green's burning gaze.

"Why not? It can't be that bad, surely..."

_It wasn't about it being bad, I just liked to keep this sort of thing to myself. I hardly ever opened up to anyone, not even Gold! So, why did Green expect me to open up to him?_

"...I just don't want to..."

I felt Green shuffle beside me as a hand gently rubbed my shoulder, causing me tense up almost immediately.

"Well, obviously you must have given him a rough time when you first became friends, because you probably couldn't understand why he wanted to be your friend...and then I'm not too sure how it escalated to this level...but I'm sure it was mainly down to Gold..."

I closed my eyes, wanting to block it all out, all the memories that were resurfacing.

_The time when Gold kissed me in the cafe... the time when I had made that stupid plan to catch him out and only ended up causing my own downfall...and the time when Gold had so easily seduced me...and claimed me in every way entirely..._

I bit my lip harshly, shrugging Green's hand off my shoulder.

"You don't know anything about our relationship... so shut up...!"

I never intended to come across as horrible I just couldn't help it right now. Being reminded of those times was just causing more pain and turmoil to cascade through my body. I heard Green sigh.

"...well I am only making logical guesses here, and besides, what's so bad that you won't tell me?"

_Well, relaxation has gone straight out the fucking window!_

"It's just none of your business!" I barked at the older boy, watching as his face contorted to a frown.

"...so what? Taking an interest in your friend's life isn't a bad thing, you know?"

I looked away quickly.

_Friend? Did he really see me as that?_

The anger that had resided inside me soon fizzled away like a dying flame and instead guilt replaced it. Looking at my hands I balled them into fists subconsciously.

"...I just...don't like talking..."

"I figured that out..." Green chuckled, and that frown that once scarred his features was now gone.

It wasn't easy for me, Green was naturally a confident person who could easily express his feelings to anyone.

_For me... it was a lot more difficult. I was so used to being cut off from everyone, to not show any emotions and to just keep everything bottled up inside that when I was being prompted to actually talk about them... I guess I just panicked. Talking about my problems...it was alien to me._

I sighed, wondering how much longer this journey was going to be.

"...well it's your choice, I don't care if you don't tell me..."

It was at that moment those words instantly reminded me of myself. I would always say that if some-one refused to tell me something and now Green was using it at me. And by the look on his face he knew damn well what he was doing.

I raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"...are you... copying me?"

"So what if I am?" Green mocked, placing his hands behind his hand.

_Did I really sound like that? So...moody? Like a stupid sulking teenager? Well, if Green was going to mimic me then I would damn well do the fucking same! But still... being like Green? How the hell was that even possible?!_

"...it doesn't suit you" I commented coldly.

"It doesn't suit you either"

My eyes scanned his face.

_He was being serious, but it wasn't like I could just change my personality! It was taking a lot of time to learn to be nicer to people, even Gold. Trust me, staying calm around Gold was so difficult sometimes I have no idea how I even managed to pull it off._

"Shut up..." I mumbled, turning away for the remainder of the journey.

Green remained silent for the rest of the time we were on the train, but I knew that somewhere deep inside he was probably laughing at me or something. Not that I cared. Once we got back to Johto the likelihood of me ever seeing him again was very slim. And with a heavy sigh I closed my eyes praying that soon we would be arriving in Goldenrod city and I could try to piece my life back together, brick by brick.

* * *

Once the magnet train had finally pulled into Goldenrod City station Green and I were the first ones to get off. Both of us were eager to get to the scene of the crime, the department store.

So both of us ran as fast as our legs would carry us, through the sea of people, through the various platforms and out onto the busy high street that was Goldenrod City.

_Everything still seemed normal, the atmosphere, the people bustling about... in fact it seemed too normal._

I shuddered violently as my fingers gripped the straps of my rucksack to stop it slipping off my shoulder's. I tailed the older boy who was far too fast to keep up with.

_Inhaling deeply I wondered what if we were too late? Maybe Cyan had already left Johto and was busy making his way to Kanto or somewhere in search of me?_

I shook my head, shoving those thoughts to the back of my mind. Cyan was not like that, he would fight me on my own turf, and it would be a fight to remember.

As Green and I ran round the corner towards the department store we came to a halt suddenly. My eyes witnessed a sea of flashing blue lights and sirens and soon it clicked just what they were.

They were police cars, and an ambulance.

"No... no..." Green mumbled painfully, now breaking out into a full sprint.

Without knowing what else to do I followed the taller boy, hot on his heels as my eyes focused on the flashing blue lights that mesmerised me.

_It was serious then if the police had been called...what if Red was really badly hurt?!_

Taking a deep breath I followed Green into the department store, not entirely sure what to expect. The only thing I was certain of was that things were not going to end well, for any of us.

When I entered the building my heart stopped almost immediately.

My eyes focused on the form of Red, lying on the floor with paramedics crowding his fragile body, pained expressions scarring their faces. I swallowed hard, watching as Green ran over to them, frantically asking a million questions, wanting answers that were just unobtainable.

It was now I noticed Red had been hit from behind because a lot of blood had leaked out of a wound in his head, causing the tiles to stain a sickening crimson colour.

Cringing I wondered if the Champion was still alive.

_Was this Cyan's doing?_

"RED! SPEAK TO ME!" Green cried out, rushing to his side helplessly.

And as he continued to shake his unconscious body into animation a horrible sickening taste flooded my mouth, making me want to vomit.

_No... he couldn't be dead... could he?_

Shakily I leant on a nearby counter, watching as police officer's placed yellow tape all round Red's body like it was a crime scene investigation that you would see on television.

_God no...if he died... then Green..._

"SILVER!" I heard a thunderous scream nearby which instantly made me turn on my heels.

It was Crystal, and _oh my God I was so fucking glad to see her!_

She rushed over to me, seemingly out of breath.

"Silver... I am so glad to see you... but...OH MY GOD! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO YOUR HAIR?!"

"...Red is lying on the floor in a pool of blood and that is the only thing you can say?!"

Crystal's face contorted to sorrow as she too looked at the lifeless form of the Champion.

_I guess it was only natural, but still, Red could be dead..._

"...is he...dead?" I managed to mutter, watching as the paramedics placed Red's lifeless body onto a stretcher, Green staying by his side as if they were glued together.

Crystal weakly shook her head.

"No... just unconscious as far as I know, but he has lost a lot of blood...oh my God... I am so pleased to see you!"

I clenched my hand into a fist.

_ FUCKING CYAN! HOW DARE HE DO THIS! _

My eyes followed the paramedics and Green's crumpled figure as they left the building, leaving only Crystal and I, and a few police officer's at the scene. Trembling slightly I asked the daunting question.

"...who did this?"

And as large sorrowful azure eyes looked into my own I knew exactly who it was before she even told me.

"Cyan..."

I gritted my teeth as a terrible blood lust clouded all irrational thought.

_That was the last straw... he was a dead man._

"But... why would Cyan hurt Red? Red wasn't even close to you!" Crystal cried out.

I shrugged, already knowing who the main target was, if he hadn't already got there.

"...where the fuck is he?!" I asked threateningly, looking around aimlessly.

The blue haired girl shrugged, as both our eyes watched the police officers pick up what seemed to be the weapon of choice. It was a cricket bat and it was stained with Red's blood. I swallowed hard, knowing that this abhorred image would forever be burnt into my memory.

"...maybe he has gone after Gold?" Crystal murmured weakly, her voice breaking slightly when she spoke his name. My eyes widened.

_No... not him! I had to make sure Gold was okay!_

"I have to go..." I muttered, patting the blue haired girl's arm gently before leaving the store.

_I had to... I had to go where Gold might be, or where Cyan might be. Anything right now would be of help._

Then I felt small fingers latch around my wrist and pull me back. I turned to face the smaller girl, watching as her face contorted to a sad frown.

"Silver... I was so wrong...so wrong about you being bad for Gold..."

I paused as her eyes fell to the ground, refusing to look at me.

"What do you mean?"

She inhaled deeply.

"...he just hasn't been the same since you left...he doesn't talk to me any more... or anyone. He just stays at home... he won't answer my calls, or answer the door when I knock for him... it's like...a part of him has died..."

_Gold was really being like that? Crystal was his best friend, if anyone should be able to get through to him it would be her. But even she had failed? This was bad._

I sighed, hating myself for so willingly breaking his heart when it could have all been avoided so easily.

"...no...Gold... he isn't like that"

Crystal's eyes finally diverted to mine as tears began to form in her eyes.

"I am so worried over him Silver... what if Cyan gets to him and he just let's Cyan hurt him because he doesn't want to live any more?"

My heart literally stopped beating when those words passed her lips.

_Gold...wouldn't want to live? That... was just not like him!_

"W-what?!"

"...the last thing he told me when you rejected him on the phone was... he felt like he wanted to die without you...he felt like everything in his life was just crumbling down and he couldn't do anything to stop it. What was the point in fighting... when there was nothing to fight for any more...?"

She sniffled as tears fell down her cheeks, and the soft ringing of police sirens were the only sounds that entered my ears.

_He... wanted to die? This... was all my fault!_

I needed to get to him, to show him I was back and to apologise for everything I had none.

_ I was such a rotten person, a bad seed, yet if Gold gave up on life because of me... I could never forgive myself._

"...I have to go and see him!"

Crystal's hand still held onto my arm, as a weak smile formed on her delicate features.

"Please... be careful... I don't want to lose you too..."

Her fingers released my arm as that sorrowful look in her eyes altered to that of hope. She had faith in me, faith that somehow I would stop Cyan, I would stop him from getting to Gold first.

I nodded weakly, before running away from the crime scene in a direction I was unsure of. One thing was certain, I needed to search everywhere, and the one place I could try first was definitely Gold's house.

* * *

My chest heaved painfully with every breath and my legs ached with every step, but I had to keep running. I couldn't give up now. I was running against the clock, and Cyan was ticking down the minutes, the seconds until Gold was in his deathly grasp.

I shuddered as I ran through Ilex Forest, knowing I still had a long way to go until I reached Gold's house.

_But still, Gold said he wanted to die?_

That thought itself was doing horrible things to my body.

_I didn't want to imagine Gold behaving like that. I was so used to those goofy smiles, to his annoying laughter and stupid jokes...it just wouldn't be him. _

I brushed away over hanging tree branches that occasionally attacked my clothes. Not that I cared if they ripped me to shreds right now, I just needed to make it, I needed to get to Gold's house.

_The memories haunted me like a restless spirit, better memories of when Gold and I were kids, and he used to play around with his Pokemon, without a care in the world. At that moment I wanted time to standstill so I could always see his stupid happy face. If he didn't smile any more...it just would be so wrong..._

Snapping out of my thoughts I managed to bump straight into a tree, knocking me off balance so I ended up falling into the damp cold ground beneath me.

I rubbed my head in annoyance as a slight pain consumed me, and the horrible wet sensation of mud started to congeal on my pants. As I opened my eyes I saw that a Hoothoot had fallen out of the tree that I had bumped into, it was dazed and confused, and instead of feeling irrational hatred towards the small owl Pokemon I just watched it. It teetered on it's leg before flopping onto the ground in confusion.

A small smile scarred my face as I just sat in the mud, watching the bird Pokemon.

_Usually I would have probably battled it or something, but no, instead I just couldn't take my eyes off it. I had no idea why either. _

Soon enough the Hoothoot came around and just sat up, preening it's feathers as large eyes glared at me in apprehension.

_Was it afraid? _

Slowly I managed to get back onto my feet, trying my best to brush off the mud that had stuck to my pants. I watched the small owl back away slightly as it continued to watch me.

T_hen again, I would probably be scared right now. _

So, I gave it a small smile before continuing on my journey to Gold's house.

My journey was a long and tedious one, and took hours. Strangely enough that Hoothoot had followed me the entire time, and it was only until I reached Azalea town that I decided that the owl could become part of my team, considering it wasn't going to leave me alone.

_I even nicknamed him Gold... well they were kind of alike. _

So, with a new addition to my team and a more confident approach to what lay ahead of me I soon found myself In Cherrygrove City.

Gold's house was not that far away now, thank God.

_If Cyan had seriously come all the way here to hurt him... he needed some sort of award. I was so tired...but then again I had no transport. Perhaps if I owned a bicycle... _

The Hoothoot sat on my shoulder as the day started to morph into evening. The skies were now turning a light shade of grey as stars started to appear amongst the heavens. It wouldn't be long until it was dark.

"Hooot~"

_It was actually kind of nice to have some new company, even if it was this weak Owl, but still...with it having so many personality traits to Gold how could I turn it away? Man... I was becoming soft..._

* * *

Finally after some time I managed to arrive at Newbark Town. It was getting dark now and I was so unbelievably tired after all that running and travelling. If anything I just wanted to sleep, but no such luck.

With Cyan on the loose that was not possible.

So ,as I returned the new addition to my team to his Pokeball my eyes focused on the building that stood in front of me, Gold's house. A large lump congealed in my throat as I wondered if he was actually inside.

_Would he even want to talk to me any more?_

Cautiously I shoved my hands in my pockets and walked up to the front door. My heart started to beat faster inside my chest until it was becoming harder to breathe.

_Well... at least it was a peaceful town, there was no way that Cyan had got here yet._

News travelled too fast in this small town.

Tentatively I raised my hand to the door, getting ready to knock but something stopped me.

_What was it? Was it the fear of being rejected? Was it that he might not even be here and that Cyan might have already gotten to him?_

I closed my eyes momentarily and took a deep breath.

_Stop being such a stupid idiot and just knock the fucking door! _

As I opened my eyes once again my knuckles softly tapped the wood of the door, and I waited. I heard a light being switched on and groans from within.

_Was it his Mother?_

"Go away Crystal... I don't want to talk to you!"

My eyes widened at hearing Gold's voice.

_He was here!_

"Gold!" I called out, knocking the door louder this time, hoping he would open it. I placed my ear against the wooden frame, listening for movement inside. But everything seemed to standstill.

"...I said... GO AWAY!"

_Did Gold even know it was me?_

Closing my eyes I knocked the door louder, listening intently for anything that would indicate that he was in the process of unlocking the door.

"...Gold... it's me! Silver..."

The last word came out as a mumble, but a part of me prayed he heard me. Then I heard something smash on the floor and then silence.

_Why wasn't he saying anything?!_

"...Gold open the door! Please..."

I hardly ever said please to anyone, but here I was literally begging him to open the door for me.

_Wasn't this a sort of role reversal?_

"...S-Silver...?" He mumbled and as I backed away from the door and allowed my rucksack to fall off my shoulder's onto the ground I heard the rattling of key's into the lock.

Before I knew it the door had swung open and Gold stood before me, wearing an old baggy t-shirt and tracksuit bottoms.

I noticed his eyes were red and bloodshot and his hair was messy and unkempt.

_Was this was Crystal meant?_

His eyes widened as they beheld my image.

"W-why...I thought you were...in Kanto?" He managed to choke out, almost breaking down immediately. I took a deep breath, trying to fight this uncontrollable urge to just hug him right now.

"I came back...Cyan is on the warpath and he is after you..."

I watched as Gold raised an eyebrow in confusion. It was as if he didn't understand what I was saying.

But, it was obvious he hadn't been sleeping properly. Dark circles encased his eyes and his skin was starting to look thin and fragile on his skinny arms, almost like cling film. His face looked gaunt and malignant, like his cheek bones were literally going to rip through his skin.

_Had he always been this thin?_

He swallowed hard as golden eyes diverted to the ground.

"...I... I thought...I would never.. s-see you again..."

I watched as his whole body heaved painfully and without thinking I placed my hands on his arms, feeling just how fragile he had become. He was literally just skin and bones, no life seemed to flourish within him any more.

"Gold... I was tricked...Cyan told me I would be working in Kanto permanently! He lied to me...he did this on purpose!"

Gold's eyes refused to look at me, as an emotionless expression covered his whole face. It was like I wasn't seeing Gold here any more, that this was just a shadow of his former self.

"...what have you done to yourself?!" I cried out, harshly shaking him by his arms.

He didn't say anything, it was like he was just broken inside and that nothing I could say would fix him.

"...you... shouldn't have come back..." He murmured weakly, eyes glassed over.

_It hurt me to see him like this, why the fuck wasn't he smiling?! FUCKING SMILE GOLD!_

"Why not?" I asked softly.

Gold's eyes now refocused on mine and now I could see deep within his soul. The flame that was once there, the beautiful spark that had inhabited his body was no longer there.

_And I had killed that flame..._

"...Cyan... he will... kill you..."

Without thinking I just pulled the shorter boy into an embrace and held him like he was literally the only thing I had left.

_Had Cyan told him this? Was that his ultimate plan?_

"No he won't, I won't let him..."

I felt Gold's weak fingers attach themselves to my t-shirt as he clung to me desperately. His whole body shuddered as I held him, and as I closed my eyes I could feel my stomach knot violently.

_Finally, I had Gold back... only he was not the Gold I once knew. It would take some time for him to come back to me._

"Please... you have to get away..." He pleaded to me, his voice returning to it's normal tone as some strength seemed to find it's way back into his feeble bones and he squeezed me tightly. Not that I minded, it had been so long since I had last seen him let alone hugged him.

"Cyan will not get away with this... I can promise that" I warned, nuzzling into his dark hair, inhaling the scent of pomegranate shampoo.

Slowly he pulled away, looking deeply into my eyes. A small weak smile crept upon his lips.

"...you cut your hair?"

"Yeah... I wanted a change"

I watched as his hand gently reached up and stroked my face. The warmth of his fingers lingered on my skin as I closed my eyes.

_God... I had missed this... But why had he done this to himself? He was so weak, so skinny...so sick..._

"I will defeat Cyan...and I will make sure he doesn't hurt you..." I promised the dark haired boy, still keeping him firmly in my arms. He weakly nodded, obviously having faith in me. Right now I wondered if I could actually defeat him.

_Did I have to believe in myself as well as my Pokemon to win? _

"...I have never stopped loving you...Silver..." He murmured softly, which made my heart flutter inside my chest.

_I had the chance right now, to tell him the truth. To tell him that I loved him too, that without him life just wasn't worth living. That when I left him all alone on the bridge... I felt like I wanted to die. But I just couldn't. Right now just didn't seem to be the right time._

Instead I found myself smiling as his fingers trailed up my face to softly caress my now shorter hair. Deep inside I hoped he knew that I loved him too, with unspoken words. After all, words were often meaningless, I had learnt that.

Instead I decided to use actions.

Pulling the fragile boy closer I pressed our lips together softly, hearing him inhale deeply as his fingers became entwined in my hair. Closing my eyes I just melted into this moment.

_I never thought I would kiss him again, to feel his fingers in my hair, to inhale the fresh scent of soap and pomegranate shampoo... and to allow myself to once again fall uncontrollably in love with him. But I had._

As our lips continued to collide together in wild and dramatic passion I just wanted time to standstill, to never move forward.

_I wanted to remain frozen in this moment forever, to forget about Cyan and how I would have to destroy him... and to forget about all the problems linked to my abusive childhood._

Deep inside I just wanted this horrible heavy weight to be set free from my mind.

_And when I was with Gold... that weight just fizzled away..._

Slowly Gold broke the kiss as large golden eyes stared into my own. Pushing his forehead against mine he sighed softly.

"...please...don't fight Cyan tonight..."

I felt his fingers remove themselves from my hair and re-attach themselves in my borrowed t-shirt.

_Was he scared that I wouldn't survive or something? Did he have literally no faith in me?_

"I have to..."

"...not tonight..."

His voice was soft and alluring as his nose briefly brushed against mine.

_Okay, now I understood what he meant. It wasn't about me fighting Cyan, or being concerned over me... he wanted me all to himself... if just for tonight. And I would be a liar if I said I didn't want the same. _

Closing my eyes briefly I nodded, deciding that tomorrow would become the judgement day for all of us, and I owed myself one night at least to feel happy. Slowly I removed one of my arms from around him and gently entwined our fingers together.

_Oh my God... I was holding his hand... _

Gold's eyes trailed downwards to our joined hands before mumbling;

"...you're holding my hand..."

"I am"

_I know I had never done it before, but ever since that dream I had I longed to do it, just to feel safe and secure. And it did. _

Gold raised his eyes to me again, a confused look scarring his features.

"Why...?"

I shrugged gently squeezing his hand in mine.

"I felt like it"

_ And I wasn't lying. _

Maybe because I wouldn't usually do this sort of thing was why Gold questioned so much, after all, we had never held hands before. Then his face morphed into a smile, one of those smiles I never realised I missed until it was staring right back at me.

"...you're going soft Silver" He joked, chuckling afterwards.

_ And maybe I was, but wasn't it allowed? I had hurt Gold way too much in my life, and it was only recently I realised how important he was to me, that if he wasn't around then nothing made sense any more. After everything I had been through he was always there for me. It wasn't like I could help it._

Instead of thinking about how soft I had become I decided that maybe it was a good idea to go inside. Slowly I released Gold's hand to pick up my rucksack.

"...just shut up and let's go inside" I smiled after my words so he knew I was only joking, but still... it was a nice change to see him smile again.

And with a last glance at the dark haired boy we both walked inside his house.

* * *

As we walked inside my ears detected the noise of some programme on the television. Probably the news or a documentary on Pokemon, it just had that boring monotone voice that usually accompanied such programmes. Other than that the house itself was quiet and still, which it usually never was. After all, Gold's Pokemon had a tendency to be hyperactive if they sensed visitors.

I watched as Gold passed me and sat his figure on the sofa, which was already starting to bring back memories. Not that I minded this time. Golden eyes stared up at me expectantly as I just stood around like an idiot, not knowing where to put myself.

"You can sit down if you like?" Gold murmured, shuffling over to the far side of the sofa so I could sit down.

I nodded, suddenly finding myself feeling nervous. I had no idea why, it wasn't like I had never been in Gold's house before.

As I settled down into the comfortable embrace I placed my rucksack on the floor and released a soft sigh.

"What the hell are you watching?" I asked, aimlessly creating chitchat.

Gold shrugged and chuckled.

"I have no idea...I guess I was just not paying attention to anything at the time..."

I frowned at the thought of Gold sitting on this sofa, bowl of ice cream and spoon in hand, comfort eating while crying over stupid romantic films.

_That was just so cliché._

I was alerted to the dark haired boy shuffling as he shoved his hand into his pocket, like he was searching for something. After a few moments he pulled out a red and white ball, a Pokeball.

My eyes diverted from the object to his face, wondering why he was holding this out to me?

"...I want you to take Typholosion with you into the battle tomorrow. Considering you won't let me come with you... I figured that I could help in someway, so please...take it"

I felt a weird feeling consume me as I stared at the Pokeball.

_Was he being serious? He was willing to trust me to use his Pokemon in a battle that could result in serious injury? Had he completely lost his mind?_

"...are you serious?"

Gold nodded.

"Of course I am! Typholosion will be able to help you out considering you don't have any fire types in your team. Please...do it for me..."

Nervously I outstretched my hand to his and slowly took the Pokeball. It felt warm and safe, like Typholosion already knew about what needed to be done.

_Would he even listen to me?_

I sighed softly.

"Will he even listen to me if I ask him to fight?"

"Of course he will! He knows you Silver, and besides... if I have trusted you to use him then... he will trust you too..."

My eyes focused on the Pokeball that lay in my hands. I hoped that he knew what he was letting himself in for, but still, having Gold's Pokemon by my side would definitely give me some added confidence.

As I placed the Pokeball into my trouser pocket I nodded, giving the dark haired boy a soft smile.

"...thanks..."

"I wanted to help you somehow, and I figured this was the best way"

As I looked into those golden eyes of his I noticed that at this precise moment in time I wasn't seeing this sick and fragile boy that looked like he could crumble to dust with a mere touch. I was seeing the old Gold, the one who used to annoy the ever loving crap out of me with his stupid jokes and sarcastic remarks, the one who somehow managed to make me see sense in the end, and the one who started this whole waterfall of emotions that I was slowly drowning in.

I closed my eyes briefly, biting my lip.

_I had to tell him, he needed to know just how I felt about him, even if I didn't say everything. Maybe if I just told him a little of how I felt..._

"Look..."

Now I had got Gold's attention I tried my best to explain myself, even though talking was still alien to me.

"...I like you..."

Gold blinked, like he never expected me to say that to him. I don't ever recall a time I ever said that I liked Gold, most of the time I used to call him an idiot or that I hated him. Then a confused look scarred his features.

"...what?"

"You heard what I said... but don't get me wrong I haven't created all this drama just because I get some stupid bubbly feeling whenever I look at you- it's just... every little thing is so overwhelming. I'm not used to this... to these... feelings or whatever, and that is why I act like I do...I guess..."

I gazed at the dark haired boy, completely un-nerved by how he had changed, and not just physically. I would never have expected Gold to sit still, on a sofa and actually talk instead of doing something stupid or annoying.

_Maybe he had changed, just like I had?_

"I don't understand.."

"Look, I said I like you, what's so hard to understand about that?"

Gold's eyebrows furrowed immediately, and he hesitated just before replying.

"I don't know... it just came across as it was something negative and that you wanted to avoid it so... you don't act like that all the time..."

_Shit, see this is why I never talk to anyone about my feelings! _

I sighed, not in annoyance though. I wanted to re-word it all better so the golden eyed boy would understand. I wasn't making it out that I hated what I felt, I was just new to it all.

"...this is why I don't talk about my feelings..." I grumbled, folding my arms and turning to look at the nearby wall.

_ I am so stupid..I should have just shut up._

Then I felt nimble fingers gently touch my arm, which made me look across at the dark haired boy. He was smiling softly.

"It's okay... I am still glad you at least tried"

His fingers moved up my arms until the palm of his hand gently cupped my cheek softly. I closed my eyes, inhaling deeply. My world at that moment just went quiet, no words, no nothing. Just the warmth of Gold's hand on my face.

And then I felt like someone had unlocked the metaphorical door to my heart and allowed all of my secrets and memories to spill out onto the floor.

"...it's so weird, that you out of all people affect me like this. It's not only a racing heart or anything, I guess... I feel content and... happy. I have never felt happy before, never in my entire life. But you, somehow manage to do that, you managed to make me forget about my past, about all the... bad things...and made it possible to look towards the future..."

I turned my head so I was looking at the shorter boy, whose eyes were widened in shock. Yeah, I guess it was an eye opener. But it was all true. I was genuinely happy when I was with him.

Then his other hand cupped my other cheek so I could no longer divert my gaze away. Sighing softly I pressed my forehead against his.

"You should be happy Silver, you out of all people deserve that at least. I know how bad things must have been for you growing up, and I know it took you along time to learn to trust me. But now...it feels like you have actually opened up to me..something that you would never do before..."

That was so true, I was so insular it was unreal. I would always push people away because I was afraid of being hurt or let down. But now, I didn't have the energy to push Gold away any more.

Slowly I closed my eyes moving my face closer to his, to feel soft lips brushing against my own.

He inhaled sharply as our lips connected in a way that felt like Gold and I were attached, and always would be. I moved my arms and wrapped them around his fragile body, pulling him against me.

_God... I wished I could have explained how I felt properly. _

Right now all logical thinking and sense went right out the window, just this moment... with him was all that mattered. The kiss lingered for a while, with Gold slowly manoeuvring his tongue into my mouth, which caused me to moan softly.

_Why was he such a good kisser?_

It was slow, and gentle. No lust filled advances...no frantic dominance.. just slow and pure. And as my hand slowly reached out to grab a fistful of dark hair he slowly pulled away from the kiss, a little breathless.

Our eyes locked together as a breathless sigh escaped his lips.

"...you drive me crazy..." I mumbled, keeping my fingers entwined in his hair.

I watched as he smiled.

"I hope that is a good thing"

Instead of saying anything else I pressed my lips against his once again as my other arm wrapped around his fragile body. Slowly I moved so I was lying on the sofa with Gold on top of me, our lips never separating. Closing my eyes I sighed softly, feeling Gold's tender hands on my cheeks, moving downwards to my jawline, caressing gently.

_This feeling... it was different than before. Before it was needy...lust driven but now, it wasn't. And I liked it._

Slowly Gold broke the kiss and sat upright with his knees either side of me.

"...I want you to promise me something" He murmured quietly.

Leaning up on my elbows I looked at him, never taking my eyes off his concerned features.

"And what's that?"

I heard him sigh, like he was thinking of the right words to say to me.

"...I want you to promise me... you won't...die tomorrow"

I blinked curiously as those words entered my ears.

_Die? Why would he think that I would die tomorrow? Cyan was a bastard but I had a feeling even if he had the chance to he wouldn't attempt to kill me. No, instead he would probably try to kill some-one who I was close to..._

"Where the hell did that come from?"

He shrugged weakly, eyes trailing down to my t-shirt. His hands moved so they started to fidget with the hem of the borrowed t-shirt.

"...I don't know...I just don't want that to happen"

I raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"Gold.. do you really think I would let that happen?!"

Once again his face seemed crestfallen and I hated it.

So slowly I cupped his cheeks with my hands, turning his face to look at me directly.

"I will destroy Cyan... I promise you"

One of his hands gently placed itself over mine, as his eyes closed for a moment. He sighed softly.

"...is that even possible?"

"I'll damn well make it possible! There is no way I am going to let him get away with any of this. You just wait and see!"

And then I saw it. A weak smile, and for that moment it made me smile too.

_But did I even have confidence in my own words? Would I actually be able to defeat Cyan? What would happen if I failed? But even so, I would cross that bridge when I came to it, and then I would burn it to the ground. Cyan was a dead man... that was something I was sure of._

* * *

**_Author's Note: Lemon will arrive next chapter people! So look forward to it! I hope you enjoyed part one of this chapter, part two should be done sooner than usual :) Please read and review, it makes me a very happy girl! Ciao!_**


	17. Missing You part two

**Author's Note: Hello all! It's my birthday! :D Hooray for me! Anyway, this chapter contains a lemon :3 you know you all want that! Also NO cliffhangers in this chapter :) just enjoy part two!**

* * *

**Chapter seventeen: Missing You: Part 2**

I wasn't quite sure what Cyan's motives were, or his intentions, but a part of me had an inclination to believe that a Pokemon battle wouldn't suffice to hear the end of this. No, even if I did defeat him he wouldn't give up. He wanted to make sure I suffered for what I did to his baby brother, and maybe that was why he was currently biding his time, waiting for the right moment to strike.

I wasn't sure.

But whatever it was that he was planning it wasn't going to work. He had already put phase one of his plan into motion when he attacked Red, ensuring I would make a swift return to Johto. He knew me better than I thought, he knew I would come back and that was what he wanted. But still, I had no idea when he would make his next move, what stunt he would pull.

_It was like this whole thing was a big game of Chess, and it was his turn to move._

"Are you okay?" Gold's voice entered my ears as I sighed.

We were currently laying down on the sofa, Gold's head resting against my chest as both of us zoned out to whatever programme was on the television. Weakly I nodded;

"...don't you wonder why Cyan hasn't done anything while I was gone?"

Golden eyes gazed at my face with confusion. It was true, and it had crossed my mind a few times.

_Every time I worried about Cyan hurting Gold he hadn't even harmed a hair on his head. Why was that?_

"...when you were gone, he tried talking to me...he tried to convince me to have nothing more to do with you because you were not worth it. After that, I just didn't have the heart to face going outside any more... so I stayed at home. Cyan hasn't tried to contact me since then"

Burying my nose into his dark hair I sighed deeply.

_I hated mind games, and he was so fucking good at them. Was he waiting for me to make my move before he did? _

I had this awful feeling that every event that had happened were all pieces beautifully linked to his devious scheme, whatever that was. I was determined to find out.

"Why would he hurt Red though? Red wasn't close to me, or even a friend...I just don't understand..."

Gold shifted so he was facing me.

"If he is just a nut case then would he even have a reason? Or maybe, it was so he knew you would come back to Johto or something. I don't know to be honest..."

He was right, there might not even be a reason for his actions.

"Man... he hurt Red? Has he got a death wish? Red is the Champion!"

"I know...and with Green on his ass I sure as hell wouldn't want to be him"

I chuckled at the thought of Green pounding him into the ground. But then another thought crossed my mind.

_Shit! I never spoke to Green after Red was taken away in the ambulance! Man... my people skills still sucked it seemed. I would have to call him later or something. _

Gold sighed softly as he rested his head against my chest once again, arms wrapping themselves around my waist. Right now it would be better to not think of any of this and just wait until the storm came.

I would deal with it then.

It was now I had just realised that all throughout the time I had spent with Gold I hadn't seen his Mom.

_Was she out? Not that I cared or anything, just the thought of her bursting in on us if we were doing anything was a little...scary to say the least. Was she even okay with her son __being gay? I hadn't asked._

"Where is your Mom by the way?"

Gold looked up at me before answering;

"She went out not too long ago to get some food in. She discovered I ate all her favourite ice cream and then she immediately went to get some more"

I watched as he smiled, and now I noticed the colour was starting to return to his cheeks. He didn't look so pale and malignant right now. I nodded, now expecting her to come back at any minute. Gold smirked cheekily;

"...why did you ask that? Did you want to make sure she wasn't around so you could...take advantage of me?"

I jolted in shock at what he said, and watched as he wiggled his eyebrows playfully. Seemed to me like Gold wasn't completely gone after all. I rolled my eyes at his stupid idea, even if it was so devilishly tempting right now.

"Gold... what I did before... when I was basically using you for sex... it was wrong, and I never meant to hurt you or...anything"

"No," Gold shook his head defiantly "...it makes sense. You only said it was a sex arrangement, and that no feelings or emotions would get involved. You wasn't using me because I knew what I was getting myself into"

I sighed as I looked into golden eyes that sparkled in the dim light. He was still defending my decision even after everything. It was a stupid plan, that only resulted in me finally admitting that I was Gay and that I actually loved this idiot!

"It was just a fucking stupid excuse! I wanted you...but I tried to distance myself at the same time, to keep control of the situation. You kept fucking taking my control away from me, and I hated it! So.. that was why this whole situation happened..."

"Are you saying you regret your decision?" Gold questioned, looking expectantly at me.

_God, I was not great at wording things, was I? _

"No...just... oh just forget it!" I snapped, pushing him away to sit up properly on the sofa.

Once again the old me resurfaced. When I was backed into a corner I would always revert back to type and snap at whoever it was. I really needed to stop that. Luckily for me Gold wasn't offended. He just laughed and nudged my arm.

"It's okay Silver, I knew what you meant..."

I turned away, trying my best to scowl but it was more like a forced grimace right now.

_God... I really had gone soft..._

Then my whole body jolted when I felt hot breath on my ear, absolutely murdering my nervous system. I just seemed to become paralysed, and I could not move. With eyes widened to the point of almost watering I started to feel a warm and moist feeling consume my ear lobe, gently teasing, causing my heart to thunder angrily inside my chest.

_Shit...what the hell was Gold doing to me?!_

"...you're so hot when you're angry you know...I just can't stop myself... I need to show you...Silver..." He purred into my ear, which caused a volcano of goosebumps to erupt all over my body.

_Holy shit! What was he doing?! That voice...it was so... alluring. I wanted him... so bad. _

I closed my eyes, biting my lip harshly as his tongue continued to slowly tease my sensitive skin around my ear, down my neck and stopped so he could suckle the skin.

"...ah! Fuck, fuck!" I cursed, as I felt my once dormant organ in my pants begin to swell with excitement.

_How had this even happened? One minute we were talking about Cyan, and then his Mom and now... this?_

My neck started to ache when he finally tore his mouth away.

_Great... he had marked me yet again._

I looked over at him, to see a lust driven sparkle light up those eyes. He had that come hither look and I swear it drove me crazy! I watched as the shorter boy lay back on the sofa, eyes never leaving mine as one of his hands slowly pulled his t-shirt up his body, revealing his stomach.

"You can't deny that you want me..." He purred softly.

My eyes just seemed to just melt in their sockets.

_Oh my God... did he have the devil in him today? When did Gold act so... hot?_

I swallowed hard as my eyes couldn't divert their gaze from looking at his stomach, at the lovely honey coloured flesh.

_I wanted it so bad..._

The ache in my groin just increased ten fold. I bit my lip, trying to fight off this uncontrollable urge to just attack him and ravage him senseless, and it was the hardest thing I have ever had to do.

Then one of his hands held mine, pulling it over to his exposed stomach and allowing my fingers to touch his skin. It was hot, almost burning and it caused the breath to hitch in my throat. I watched as Gold closed his eyes, sighing softly as he moved my hand slowly over his exposed stomach. Then he was using my hand to pull his t-shirt further up his body, allowing more skin to fall under my watchful gaze.

_He really wanted me to touch him?_

My free hand moved to gently caress his stomach while the one he had control over desperately tugged at his t-shirt. I watched as his body arched like a cat as I touched him, hearing breathless moans escape his lips.

_God... this was torture..._

"Silver..." He breathed out, eyes still closed.

I smirked watching as the dark haired boy started to get flustered. Chewing my lip I removed my hand from his grasp to slowly massage the semi erect organ that lay waiting in his tracksuit bottoms. Gold gasped as he moved his hands to lie at either side of his head.

_He liked it! Gold liked me doing this to him._

"Do you.. want me to?" I asked, watching as lust driven eyes opened slightly.

A weak nod was the only affirmation I needed. As I squeezed his arousal softly I felt Gold's hips buck upwards, allowing my fingers more access to his growing need that longed to be freed. With my other hand slowly I pulled the tracksuit bottoms down along with those white cotton boxers, baring the honey coloured skin more and more.

_Gold was so vulnerable now...he was waiting for me to take him... and God I wanted him so badly_.

I couldn't help but grunt as my hand slowly closed around unfamiliar skin, and started to move, slowly.

"A-Ah..." He groaned softly, his whole body writhed under mine as my hands gently worked his organ, pumping it softly to start off with only to speed up and slow down again. I knew I was driving him insane with this, but I wanted him to enjoy the feeling, after all, usually he was the one touching me. My heart pounded in my chest as I admired the object in my hand.

Slowly extending the strokes I squeezed tighter around it, while I allowed my other hand to softly embrace the sack, massaging in time with every stroke.

"...oh God...Silver..." Gold moaned out, hands becoming limp at either side of his head as his breathing seemed to become very irregular.

He was struggling, and God it was so appealing. I closed my eyes momentarily, just wanting to feel... to hear everything that was going on right now. Gold's breathless moans were driving me insane, and with every passing second I could feel myself getting harder and harder.

I slowed down my strokes only to hear him whimper under my gaze, then I would quicken up again. His face showed signs that he was struggling, and that soon enough he would just release, and that was what I wanted. Alternating the pressure seemed to be working.

"...aahhh...please...don't stop.." He groaned, bucking his hips upwards as my hand continued to work his organ. Then I found myself leaning over his writhing body to place a subtle kiss on his neck. The skin was hot and laced with sweat, and after that kiss had melted into his skin I started to suckle on it, savouring the salty flavour that the sweat had caused.

Gold panted, fingers now becoming entwined in my hair as my mouth assaulted his neck. This was what we both wanted, so it was okay. His body trembled under me as I knew he was so close to release, and with that in mind I quickened the pace.

"...oh God~!" He cried out, hands moving down from my hair, to my shoulders and continued to move until they started to slowly slide my trousers down.

_Wow, he was eager!_

I groaned softly as I felt the material rub against my hardened organ. Right now I craved him, I wanted him so badly... With one final suckle on his neck I pulled away, hearing him inhale sharply. A nice purple mark lay on his skin, that was something to revel about later.

* * *

As my hand continued to pump his arousal, feeling it pulsate with need, a vague sound at the front door made me stop and remove my hand immediately. As our eyes shot open I heard the sound of the door creaking, as if it was being opened.

_Oh shit! _

Gold ended up burying his face into my t-shirt, and without thinking I lay on top of him, covering his half naked body up as much as I could.

_Please don't let it be his mom... please..._

"AAAHHHHHH!"

I heard the shriek and winced, feeling Gold's hands latch onto my t-shirt desperately.

_Yeah.. it was his mom... great..._

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING TO MY SON?!" I heard her loud voice enter my ears and deep within I just knew I was for the high jump.

"Mom..." Gold mumbled, hidden from view and literally clinging to me like a lifeline.

I glanced at the older woman, watching as the colour drained from her face, and she looked as if she was going to pass out.

_Well... this was obviously not expected._

"...I'm sorry about this..." He continued, poking his head from out of my t-shirt to look at the figure of his Mother. I watched as she steadied herself against the wall, dropping the bags of shopping on the floor.

"Gold... what the hell is going on?! Why is there a... boy on top of you?!"

_Okay, so he hadn't told her he was Gay yet. Well, she must definitely know now!_

I sighed softly, feeling Gold shuffle underneath me.

"Mom...what does it look like?"

_I couldn't believe he just said that! I might even get kicked out for doing this!_

The older lady sighed heavily, placing a hand to her head.

"...please don't tell me you were...you know..."

"No, but... if you hadn't have come back.. then we could have..." Gold admitted.

I was starting to get cramp in my leg given the awkward position but if I moved now his Mom would see everything! Well, even though she had probably seen it all before anyway. She shook her head in disappointment.

"Gold.. I have taught you better than to have one night stands with people!"

"He is not a one night stand!" I heard the dark haired boy's voice raise in pitch, as I watched him sit up slightly.

Thankfully I was still covering the vital areas, so it was okay. In all of this I stayed quiet, thinking if I said anything I was definitely going to get kicked out.

"You mean this has been going on for a while?!" She screamed at him.

_ Guess the cat was out of the bag now._

"You wouldn't understand anyway..." He grumbled, nuzzling into my t-shirt protectively.

I watched as the older lady placed her hands on her hips.

"Too right, I don't! So what, are you Gay? Or just experimenting with your sexuality?!"

I sighed, really wanting to say something right now. I had half expected his Mom to be understanding, and give him a break.

_Instead, she was demanding that he tell her exactly what was 'wrong' with him, even though being Gay wasn't wrong at all._

"Yes I am Gay!" He answered defiantly, bringing his arms up to wrap around me tightly.

"...and I love him..."

She huffed as she started to pick up the bags of grocery off the floor.

"Gold love, you're seventeen! What you feel isn't love! It's just lust... you'll get over it soon enough..."

You have no idea how angry that made me.

_Did she have any fucking idea about what love felt like?! Probably not, considering she was all alone._

I bit my lip, trying to stop myself from cursing, but surprisingly Gold did it for me.

"How can you say that?! You have no idea how I feel! I might only be seventeen but that doesn't mean I don't know what love is!"

_I think I knew what she meant. It wasn't that he was too young to fall in love, it was probably the idea of her precious golden boy being in love with another boy that she couldn't handle. She probably hoped this was just a phase he would grow out of or something... God... it got me so agitated._

The older woman sighed and walked towards the kitchen, bags in tow, ignoring us.

"You have no idea how angry I am right now..." I murmured to the dark haired boy feeling the need to punch something right now.

I watched as he smiled at me and gently placed a hand to my face.

"Ignore her...she will understand eventually...she has to"

He was right of course, if she didn't want her son to completely hate her for eternity this was just something she had to get used to, even if she disliked it.

_ But maybe most of her actions were down to being shocked, which I suppose might have been understandable._

Slowly I helped Gold pull his boxers and tracksuit bottoms up his legs so he was finally decent. With a heavy sigh I lifted off his body, watching as he adjusted his crumpled t-shirt.

_Well... I guess sex was definitely out of the question now..._

"So... what now?" I asked him in a low voice, hearing his Mother potter about in the kitchen. Gold leaned over to me to whisper in my ear.

"We could always wait till she falls asleep, or sneak up to my bedroom?"

I glanced in the direction of the kitchen, having the distinct feeling his Mother would be far too busy to interfere, and besides...he was old enough to do what the hell he wanted! As I adjusted my trousers the thought seemed so tempting.

_To claim Gold while his Mother was actually in the same house? Just thinking about it was making my trousers tighten._

My eyes met his and with a simple wiggle of his eyebrows we both quietly stood up, trying our utmost not to make a sound. With one final glance at the kitchen Gold and I made our speedy getaway up the stairs, hoping that she wouldn't try to stop us doing what we wanted to.

* * *

As Gold and I rushed into his bedroom I watched the shorter boy quickly grab a key from a nearby dressing table to lock the door. Well, at least that was comforting, there was no way she would be coming in now.

_Unless she kicked the door down... _

I sighed heavily, not quite believing that we had got caught _doing... that! _

_What if we were actually doing it! Oh my God she probably would have had a heart attack! _

Gold turned to me, placing the key back where he found it.

"...so will your Mom stay mad at you?"

"She is shocked... that's all, she'll come round eventually"

And a large smile smothered those features which instantly lifted my heart right into the heavens.

_How I loved that smile..._

"But still... it definitely killed the moment..." I groaned, combing my fingers through my hair in annoyance. Gold nodded in agreement.

"Yes, but... she isn't here now..."

I watched as he walked closer to me before pulling me into an embrace.

_It was gentle, loving...and I liked it._

Closing my eyes briefly I sighed.

"Gold..."

I loved how his name sounded when I said it out loud, and even better when I moaned it. I shivered slightly, loving the soothing warmth he emitted. As his nose nuzzled into the crook of my neck his voice purred softly;

"...there is so much I want to give you..."

Sighing softly I just melted into this embrace, never wanting it to end.

"Well what's stopping you?"

His eyes raised to look into mine as a small smile crept upon those lips.

"...nothing..."

As his arms wrapped around my neck our faces drew closer so our lips touched, softly. I closed my eyes, loving how soft they were, how good he tasted in my mouth. He was like a drug to me, and every time we kissed I was having my fix. I held onto his hips as our mouths collided, fitting together just perfectly, as if they were made for each other. His tongue delicately flickered out every so often to tease my lips, just dampening them and not daring to meet my own just yet.

_God... he was such a tease sometimes... _

Every time his tongue traced the contours of my mouth it would just open expectantly, waiting, until eventually my own entwined with his. He whimpered, grabbing fistfuls of my hair as he pulled me deeper into the kiss.

_My God...he was driving me insane... _

I groaned softly as our mouths collided, tongues entwining ferociously like battling Arbok's.

_... I loved this..._

Reluctantly he pulled away from the kiss a little breathless, and looked into my eyes.

"...we also have a lot of...catching up to do..."

I nodded weakly, also feeling out of breath.

"..like what?"

Gold smirked as his nose touched mine delicately.

"...we haven't played chess in a while..."

A few seconds of awkwardness followed as I was hit by a non too pleasant flashback in the Pokemon Centre, but when I looked at Gold's face I knew he wasn't meaning it literally. He meant it in the way everyone saw it back then. I ended up smirking too.

"You're right, I'm a little rusty though..."

"That's okay... we could always practise..."

I shivered, knowing exactly what he meant. It was so tempting that I literally just wanted to pounce on him. And as his arms reached around my waist to pull my body flush up against his he moaned seductively;

"...your move..."

Allowing that feral side of me out into the open I grabbed Gold by the scruff of his t-shirt and forced our lips together. I heard a soft whimper as my mouth attacked his in this hungry rage.

_I needed him... I wanted him so badly... _

Gold's eyes closed as his hands gently placed themselves on top of mine, relaxing my grip immediately. I could feel my trousers tighten with every passing second, with every time our tongues danced together and with every moan that escaped his lips.

Slowly I pushed the shorter boy forward, allowing the kiss to break so he could fall, flustered on his bed. Golden eyes stared up at me as I crawled on top of him, never diverting my gaze. I wanted to absorb this image for eternity, the beautiful tantalising image of Gold with ruffled hair, lust clouded eyes and panting for air.

_Fuck... it was such an appealing image._

"...I said you were good at Chess..." Gold mocked, raising an eyebrow at me, as if he was beckoning me to do something else.

Deep inside I allowed a second of thought before deciding this wasn't enough. Gold wasn't going to mock me and get away with it. I smirked as my hand slowly moved downwards and started to massage his semi-erect organ through his tracksuit bottoms.

He groaned softly, pushing locks of dark hair further into the pillows as his body arched at my touch. I knew he was horny, but I never expected this. As my hand softly fondled him I could hear breathless sighs escaping into the atmosphere.

_Was he eager? Did he want more?_

"S-Silver..." He mewled, legs writhing underneath me.

Biting my lip I tried to ignore how hard I was, and how much I just wanted to ravage him. Gold was usually the one in control, only this time it seemed like he wanted me to be the dominant party. Not that I minded.

One of his hands became fisted in the bedsheets as the other lay limp at his side. My eyes drank in the image of the dark haired boy panting for air like he would run out of it soon.

_So...hot... _

As his eyes fused closed I took this opportunity to really put my plan into action. My fingers danced underneath the material of his tracksuit bottoms and his boxers until my hand was once again teasing his arousal, feeling the warm hard length. Gold gasped loudly, bucking his hips accidentally as I stroked him.

Nearing his ear I whispered;

"...checkmate..."

The boy shuddered underneath me as his fingers desperately curled around the bed sheets, panting like his life depended on it.

_This was such an appealing image...if this was in my dreams they definitely would not be nightmares._

"A-ahh...stop...teasing me..." He murmured weakly, moaning softly every time I would apply enough pressure towards the tip of his length. I figured he liked it there.

Softly I placed feather like kisses all along his neck, feeling every movement he made against my own body. It was driving me insane, if I had my way his clothes would be ripped apart and then I would have just ravaged him senseless. But I had to stay in control.

Slowly with my other hand I started to slide his bottoms down, exposing more and more of the younger boy beneath me. He made no sounds of protest, just delicious moans that were driving me up the wall.

"...Oh God...aaahh...S-Silver..." He panted as my pace slowed down to an excruciating rate.

Once his bottoms were removed I went back to the task at hand, and quickened the pace up a little. He bit his lip as golden eyes refused to open. He probably knew I watching his facial expressions, I took great pleasure in seeing his face contort like he was about ready to explode in pleasure.

Once again my mouth neared his neck, placing a delicate chaste kiss on his honey coloured flesh, which soon turned into suckling, hard enough to create a mark. Gold wriggled underneath me, obviously struggling to stay calm. Torturing Gold like this was causing my erection to pulsate uncontrollably in my pants, just hearing his moans, seeing his face, and tasting his skin was doing unbelievable things to me.

"A-ahh...I...Oh God... I... want you... so badly...aaahhh..." Gold groaned loudly, hips bucking upwards with every time I stroked his hardened length.

_So, he wanted it too?_

As I tore my mouth away from his neck I eyed the purple mark, pleased with my handiwork.

Then I slowly removed my hand, watching how Gold's eyes shot open almost immediately. His mouth opened to protest, but was soon quietened down when I placed a finger to his lips.

"...you said you wanted me, didn't you?"

He nodded, large golden eyes staring up at me expectantly. I smirked, loving how right now I had ultimate control over this situation.

As I removed my finger from his lips I started to remove my t-shirt. My eyes caught sight of the dark haired boy watching me eagerly, mouth slightly agape.

_It was so attractive..._

Once the garment was thrown onto the floor somewhere my hand wondered towards Gold's t-shirt, which was very old by the looks of it. It just looked very worn out. As I slowly pulled the garment further up his body he raised his arms to help me remove it entirely. And once that too was discarded I grabbed his hand, edging it towards my trousers.

"...so make your move" I purred.

Gold's large golden eyes looked up at me innocently, before turning into a mischievous glance. I let go of his hand, noticing that both of them were now working to try to unzip the borrowed garment. I closed my eyes briefly, feeling nimble fingers occasionally brush against my arousal, which caused me to groan softly.

As Gold started to slide the trousers down my legs I helped him remove them entirely, and they too ended up on the floor.

Once most of the annoying items of clothing were now missing I pressed my body flush against Gold's, feeling his erection brush against my stomach. A breathless moan escaped his lips as skinny arms wrapped themselves around my waist.

"S-Silver..."

As my nose nuzzled the purple bruise that lavished his honey coloured skin I felt his lips attaching themselves to any part of my body he could get hold of, _my neck, my collarbone, my throat..._

Closing my eyes I sighed softly, loving the sensation of his tongue dancing across my skin.

_ I only wished it was somewhere else... _

In response I grind my hips into him, brushing against his erection, only to hear him whimper like a puppy.

"A-aaahhhh..."

"How badly do you want it, Gold?" I whispered into his ear, causing more friction against his hardened length every time I rocked my body over his.

Fragile fingers dug harder into my back, clawing softly, not hard enough to create any marks. Hissing slightly I closed my eyes, my hands lying either side of Gold's head, longing to do something right now. His body writhed desperately underneath me as sweat started to congeal all over his beautiful honey blemished skin.

"...oh God...I... aaahhh..." He mewled loudly as my own erection through my boxers was rubbing against his.

Breathless moans escaped my lips every time my hips rocked against the dark haired boy, feeling his body shudder in delight.

"I can't hear you..." I moaned into his ear, slowly tracing my tongue over the sensitive flesh.

Panting loudly like no amount of oxygen would ever be enough I heard grunts and groans escape into the atmosphere around us.

"I...aaahhh...want you...Oh God...so...badly"

I bit my lip hard, trying to keep control of this situation.

_Gold was doing insane things to me right now, all those moans...the heavy breathing... it was torture! _

I removed my hand from the side of his head until one of my fingers was just barely teasing the edge of his entrance. His body shuddered suddenly at the contact, he obviously wasn't used to it. As I slowly slid my finger inside the tight ring of muscle Gold gasped loudly, fingers digging harder into my back. I closed my eyes tightly, trying to ignore the overwhelming sensation his clawing was doing to me. I wriggled my finger slightly, feeling just how tight it was inside of him, how the hell I would fit in there I had no idea.

"S-Silver~!" He cried out loudly, before I had to place a hand over his mouth.

_The last thing I wanted was his mother banging on the door, demanding me to stop having sex with her son. That can fuck right off!_

Golden eyes shot open and met my own as my finger continued to loosen the tightness deep inside of him.

_I so wasn't used to this, I had no idea if I was doing it right! But from the noises Gold was making I had a feeling I was._

He was panting and moaning against my hand, causing soft vibrations through my skin. I shuddered. Holding this out for much longer I doubted I could do right now.

"...not so loud..." I warned softly, watching as he nodded weakly, eyes now becoming half lidded with sheer lust. Without warning I entered a second finger, feeling his body jolt suddenly. I wasn't sure whether it was through pleasure or discomfort, but I had a feeling he would be used to it soon. Removing my hand from Gold's mouth allowed the remaining pants and gasps free into the open air as two fingers wriggled unmercifully inside of him.

_He was enjoying this!_

"Aaahh...S-Silver...please...aaahh..." He begged, fingers desperately clawing at my back.

I groaned at the touch, really wanting to just rip my boxers off and ravage his body senseless. His hair had fanned out all over the pillow whilst hot moans just danced off his tongue, causing my arousal to pulsate with want. He had no idea how aroused I was right now.

"Please what?" I murmured into his ear softly, feeling every tremble, every vibration his body emitted.

Sounding more like a strangled moan he managed to choke out;

"...please...fuck me..."

Slowly I removed my fingers from his entrance, deciding that he had begged enough right now.

My eyes scanned the bedroom in search of something to use, some lotion or anything would be handy right now. But I couldn't see anything. Gold's eyes opened fully, panting urgently, watching me scan his bedroom for something to use. Then I think it clicked.

"Wait... I have some...hand lotion in my bedside drawer..."

As I leant over the dark haired boy's body to reach the drawer it suddenly dawned on me.

_Hand...lotion? Was he trying to be funny? _

When I opened the drawer and retrieved the bottle I looked at it curiously in my hand, wondering why it seemed so familiar. Then the penny dropped.

_Wasn't this... my hand lotion?!_

"Gold... why do you have my hand lotion?" I asked, holding it out for him to see.

I watched as he smiled wildly, like a naughty child who had just gotten caught stealing sweets from a candy store.

"...it's not yours...I bought it!"

Staring at the object in my hands yet again I wondered why on Earth Gold would buy strawberry scented hand lotion.

_I thought it was just me who was weird..._

"...can I ask why?"

Gold used his elbows to prop himself up.

"Because... it reminded me of you... of us...and besides, I never knew when it might come in handy"

I so wanted to murder him right now for that, but instead I just nodded. I never quite realised how popular my hand lotion would become.

Whilst staring at the bottle I hardly noticed Gold wrapping his arms around my neck and pressing his warm soft lips to mine. Closing my eyes I inhaled deeply, savouring the taste of him on my lips, enjoying the warmth he emitted.

Then I realised Gold was moving. His body shuffled from underneath me until somehow he ended up on top of me, straddling my hips.

_Not that I minded, but still, didn't he want me to be the dominant one?_

When we broke the kiss Gold gently took the bottle from my hands and with the other started to pull down my boxers. I bit into my lip, watching as he eyed my erection. It wasn't like he had never seen it before. Then he smirked, like he was thinking of something mischievous and naughty. And he was.

I just watched as he opened the bottle and squeezed out the strawberry scented lotion onto his hand. Then he caught me completely off guard when a cold sensation consumed my arousal, causing me to shudder violently.

_It was Gold! _

His hand was now wrapped around my hardened length, along with the coating of lotion and slowly started to stroke up and down.

"..A-aahhh..."I groaned softly, loving yet hating this weird warm yet also cold sensation that consumed me.

I closed my eyes as my hands now became limp just above my head, just staying there and not moving. Gold's pace quickened which somehow made my arousal get harder and pulsated with desperate need of release. Panting heavily I tried to remember to breathe at all times and not just try to hold it inside of me. Passing out didn't seem very appealing right now.

"...I want you so badly..." Gold murmured softly, his hands now becoming warm on my arousal as the cold sensation dissipated completely.

_God... I wanted him too...it had been too long..._

Once my erection was coated with the lotion Gold slowed the motions down to a stop. Weakly I opened my eyes wondering what had caused him to stop, but I soon discovered what he was up to.

"S-Silver...I want you to fuck me..." He groaned, moving his body upwards while his hand started to guide my erection.

Eyes widened I knew what he was planning, and I had no idea what was going to happen afterwards. Feeling my heart thunder in my chest and my breathing become very rapid I watched as slowly he guided the tip of my arousal into his entrance. I closed my eyes when I felt a tight feeling on the tip, and right at that moment I had doubts he would even fit it inside.

Gold inhaled deeply, his body shivering slightly with every inch that slithered inside him.

_I knew it would be uncomfortable at first, it was for me...but soon it would change_.

Feeling the tightness suffocating my hardened length it took all my control not to just thrust merciless into him. But I had to. Exhaling deeply Gold waited once all of my length was inside of him. My hands wondered to gently place on his hips, to coax him into moving slightly. This waiting was excruciating.

"Are you.. okay?" I asked nervously, watching as he nodded weakly.

It was weird to be in this position, but I just hoped Gold knew what he was doing. Sighing deeply I pushed my head further back into the pillows when I felt Gold's muscle tighten considerably around me.

_Shit...I needed to move and soon._

"Yeah...move..." He groaned out, panting slightly as his hands now held onto my shoulders tightly.

Thrusting my hips slowly I allowed my length to slide out of him only to push deeper inside of him. With eyes closed and his hands tightening on my shoulder's I had a feeling the discomfort was still there.

"Why don't you move instead?" I suggested, leaving Gold to do all the work.

_And it was the best thing I have ever suggested._

In his own time Gold lifted himself off my arousal only to plunge back inside, and soon enough he wasn't panting due to discomfort.

"S-Silver..." He moaned, back arched like a feral cat as my hips thrust in time with him, plunging deeper into that warm tight spot deep inside him.

It was like heaven, and my heart was feeling the effects. My eyes became half lidded with lust every time Gold bounced harder.

_It was driving me insane!_

"Fuck...aaahhh...Gold..." I mewled, feeling my stomach muscles contract every now and then.

My hands steadied his hips with every movement, and with every chance I could get I absorbed the arousing image of Gold, _hair laced with sweat, panting and moaning out my name... and bouncing harder and harder on my arousal. _

_Oh my God... it was so fucking hot..._

"Oh God...yes..."

Gold's cheeks were flushed, and he was moaning and groaning with practically every breath, whilst I was trying so hard to hold it all together. My release was bubbling deep within and I knew if I kept going at this rate it wouldn't be long.

"G-Gold..." I moaned softly, feeling his fingers dig into my shoulders with every thrust.

I never imagined what it would feel like doing it this way instead, but I understood why Gold liked fucking me so much. My heart felt like it was going to explode in my chest every time Gold would bounce.

_Well... he definitely got what he wanted._

"Oh S-Silver...aaahhh...oh God..." He groaned out loud, getting louder and louder the closer he was to releasing, but right now I didn't want to stop him.

_Who gives a shit if his mom heard us?!_

My fingers gripped his hips firmly, as right now the only thing that entered my mind was Gold, and this moment.

_I didn't care about Cyan... about how tomorrow I would fight him, none of it mattered right now. This was the only thing that mattered._

"..fuck...aaahh...I'm...I'm gonna..." He cried desperately, his body shuddering with every precious thrust.

I grunted in response, fusing my eyes shut as this weird emotional surge just seemed to flood through me. It was something I had never felt before. And as Gold bounced a few more times, pushing my arousal even deeper inside of him his whole body convulsed.

"...Oh God...yes...yes...aaahhh...Silvvvvveeeeeer~!" Gold cried out loudly, as his hardened length released all over his stomach and my own, coating us in white sticky liquid.

The muscles deep inside him contracted painfully around my arousal which tipped me over the edge. Groaning softly I released deep inside the dark haired boy, feeling my erection twitch and pulsate. Weakly I opened my eyes, panting heavily only to see Gold's head was bowed and he was also trying to get his breath back.

_God... I missed that..._

"Fuck..." I groaned, feeling just how sensitive I was after the orgasm.

Then my attention was diverted to something else, a soft sound.

_If I didn't know better it sounded like... crying?_

Slowly I tilted Gold's head up to see his face, and as my eyes fell upon his crumpled face I wondered if I hurt him.

"Shit! Did I hurt you? I never meant to-"

"No..."He butted in, smiling weakly as a single tear dribbled down his face. "...it just...meant a lot that's all..."

As my erection started to go limp inside of the dark haired boy I shook my head, not believing him.

_Who cries over that?!_

"But... you're crying"

I watched as he wiped his face on the back of his hand, still keeping that smile on his face.

"I'm not upset or hurt if that's what you think.."

_So why was he crying? Usually people cry if they are sad, or hurt in some way. You don't cry for no good reason._

As he slowly lifted himself off my now limp organ I hissed at feeling how sensitive it was. Then Gold moved to lie beside me, snuggling up to me to rest his head on my chest. With a heavy sigh he started to speak again.

"...I'm happy"

As my arm slowly wrapped around him I pulled the bed covers over us with my other arm to gain some heat from somewhere.

"...happy?" I questioned.

He nodded into my chest, as his arm draped itself over my waist.

"Yes...I am"

I raised an eyebrow in confusion.

_Why was he happy? Was it because we had sex and it was good? _

"About what?"

Gold raised his head to look at me straight in the eyes. He sighed dreamily.

"...I have you back..."

And at that moment my heart fluttered like a trapped Butterfree.

_Was that why he cried? Because I was back, and we were okay?_

I smiled weakly as I nuzzled into the top of his head, now inhaling the smell of pomegranate, strawberries and also the smell of sex. It was a weird combination.

"And it seems I won the game of chess too..." I added in coyly, knowing it would probably annoy him. He chuckled and playfully hit my side.

"...I let you win..."

"Like hell you did! You were the one begging for me, remember?"

And it was so true, he couldn't deny it. Gold shrugged weakly, sighing softly.

"...I can't help it...you do weird things to me"

_Too right! But, this had to be the best time Gold and I had sex, in fact, it almost didn't feel like just sex. It felt like we connected a lot more, on an emotional level, which was hard for me to comprehend. So what did that mean?_

"...likewise..."

And as we lay there entwined amongst the bed sheets, allowing the afterglow to settle in I was almost positive I heard Gold's mom going ballistic just down the hall. Shrugging to myself I decided some things just weren't worth getting upset over. And some of those things were the events that were sure to unfold tomorrow morning.


	18. The Showdown

**Author's Note: Hello all! Okay, warning! This chapter starts off all sweet and cute bit there will be major dramas unfolding so any of you who are emotionally unstable...please have tissues handy. Enjoy this next emotional chapter xD Also... this is a very long chapter!**

* * *

**Chapter Eighteen: The Showdown**

When I finally managed to open my eyes the room was still shrouded in a soft blanket of darkness. I figured it was still night time and even though I was awake it wasn't due to my restless mind, or the haunting nightmares. No, this time I had just naturally risen which was a pleasant change. No bad dreams, no horrible visions, no nothing.

I sighed softly, my eyes trying to depict the ceiling above me in the poor light. I felt Gold's body beside me, curled up peacefully and completely unaware of my presence. Deep inside I found myself smiling at the innocent image, how at ease he seemed whilst deep in slumber land.

Rubbing my forehead with my hand I decided to let my mind wonder. Today was the day, the day I would see him again and probably the only time I would be able to put a stop to his devious scheme. A Pokemon battle wouldn't be the end of this, it would probably lead to something much more serious, something that I didn't want Gold getting involved in. Or anyone else for that matter. This was my fault so I was going to sort it out.

My eyes trailed downwards to once again watch Gold sleeping, his body wrapped up like a cocoon in the bedsheets while masses of dark hair fanned out all over the pillow. Somehow this idiot had managed to keep the demons of my mind at bay for at least one night, and that was something I would be forever thankful for.

Turning over onto my side I pulled the dark haired boy closer, nuzzling into the back of his neck. He shuffled slightly but did not awaken. And as we lay there in silence, basking in the moonlight that seeped in through a gap in the curtains I just allowed myself to relax. I wondered what he was dreaming about. Probably a huge Pokemon battle, or playing with his Aipom. Just thinking about the possible scenarios made me smile as I finally closed my eyes, inhaling the lingering scent of pomegranate and strawberries.

* * *

"Silver..."

A voice taunted my senses into waking and as I weakly opened my eyes I could barely picture Gold leaning over me, hair flopping over his right eye._ Did I fall asleep again?_ As a loud yawn escaped my lips I heard his voice again;

"Silver, get up!"

After swiftly rubbing my eyes I propped myself up on my elbows, watching Gold move away so he was back to his own side of the bed.

"...what time is it?" I groaned groggily, actually pleased I managed to get a decent night's sleep for once. Gold glanced at the alarm clock that was situated on his bedside table.

"It's 7:00am."

_ And can someone tell me why he was waking me up this early?! _

Grumbling I pulled the bed sheets over my head in an attempt to block out all the noise and natural light that was starting to hurt my brain. Then I felt his hands start to nudge me, causing my body to rock from side to side.

"Come on Silver! Don't you smell that?!"

Curiously I poked my head out of the bedsheets and sniffed the air. What ravaged my senses seemed to be something vaguely similar to that of cooking. _Was some-one cooking breakfast?_ Gold's face became a picture of perfection as he smiled wildly at me.

"That smell means we are forgiven!"

He practically screamed in delight before lunging himself at me. As his body pushed me further into his mattress I just merely sighed. At least some-one was chipper this morning, unlike me. Gold's arms tightened around my neck happily, making it harder for me to breathe. It was only when I made a choking sound did he let go, his face portraying how sorry he was.

"...sorry..."

"I seriously don't understand how you can be so...happy this early in the morning." I groaned, rubbing my neck in annoyance. He shrugged and sat upright, folding his legs. Large golden eyes stared right into my own.

"Trust me, usually my Mom can't kick me out of bed."

As I sat up, allowing the bedsheets to drape over the lower half of my body a part of me wondered why that smell even existed right now.

_ If it was his mother then why the sudden change of heart? I was almost sure she heard what happened last night, after all, her ranting outside the door was an obvious give away. _

Frowning in thought I couldn't quite understand any of it.

"So why would your mom be cooking for you after what happened yesterday?" I asked, watching as the dark haired boy combed his fingers through his wild hair. That is what a night of wild passionate sex does to you, it gives you a whole new hairstyle. His eyes met the floor briefly before meeting my own.

"I don't know, maybe she finally understands?"

"I doubt that, last night she was ranting down the hallway...she must have heard us or something,"

Gold gasped, his face expressing sheer shock as his cheeks started to tint into a beautiful shade of red._ Well come on...he did kind of scream my name._ I smirked, knowing that as soon as I stepped one foot into the living room I was for the high jump. I don't think violating someone's son was going to be something to be given credit for.

"SHIT!" He cried, now deciding to cover his blushing face with his hands.

"...Gold you're seventeen...she can't do shit to you." I replied monotonously.

He shook his head weakly before collapsing against my shoulder, refusing to remove his hands. I sighed softly, not quite understanding why he was getting so worked up over it.

"It's not that...I don't want my mom hearing us... you know!" He elaborated, which sounded muffled because of his hands. That was a fair point, I sure as hell wouldn't want some-one else hearing me.

Slowly I wrapped my arm around his shoulder, trying to offer some form of support._ If she wasn't scarred for life then she would get over it, after all, didn't she expect this to happen at some point?_

"I don't know, maybe it could give her some tips?"

I was met my Gold's icy cold stare which made me realise that the joke was bad. Shrugging weakly I forced a smile.

"...it was a joke..."

"Yeah, but I suppose we can't hide in here forever," Gold mumbled, moving away from my shoulder and allowing me to see his face once again. The red hue had died down but I could still tell he was embarrassed.

As he shuffled to the edge of the bed my eyes never diverted their gaze not even for a second. They stayed glued to his slim figure as he stood up, allowing me a perfect view of his butt. My eyes widened but then out of sheer respect I decided to look at the back of Gold's head instead.

_My God...he had such a cute butt... _

I shook my head, trying to remove those incriminating thoughts as he started to look through his chest of drawers for something clean to wear. No such luck for me, I had left my rucksack downstairs.

_Fuck... my... life._

As the dark haired boy retrieved a pair of shocking blue boxers and placed them on the bed my eyes couldn't help but read the white writing that covered the garment. _And I ended up reading it aloud..._

"...horny like a wolf?" I mused, looking at the blue boxers with a raised eyebrow.

Gold turned to face me, then back to the garment that sat in front of me. He shrugged and then smiled, that lovely mischievous smile that wreaked havoc with my insides.

"Well... I was last night," He teased, winking at me before returning to the search for the clothes. That was so true, and even if the garment was a little 'out there' secretly I liked it. _Now I wished I had some comical boxers..._

I stayed in the bed, keeping everything concealed from view. Even though Gold had seen it all before it was just natural for me, I couldn't just parade around in the nude! Even if Gold would have loved that.

"...don't you think we should shower or something?" I suggested, feeling slightly dirty after what we had done. Gold paused and turned to face me, which immediately made my face redden.

_God... had he no shame?_

"Well I don't own a shower, I only have a bath,"

_ How could I listen to any of the words that came out of his mouth when he was standing stark naked in front of me, giving me the best view I have ever seen in the morning?_

Shaking my head slightly I rubbed my face, trying to fight off the tantalising images that returned to haunt me.

_Fuck...it was way too early for this..._

"That will be fine.." I croaked out, wondering if Gold noticed my actions, and why I was behaving like a complete and utter idiot. Thankfully Gold turned around again, giving my heart a chance to calm down.

"...so you want to have a bath with me?" He muttered whilst continuing to search for clothes. I shrugged, not really minding, after all how bad could it be? Even though I had never bathed with anyone before.

"Well... considering having a shower is out of the question I don't have much of a choice, do I?"

I heard him chuckle as finally he managed to find something suitable to wear. He decided on a plain blue t-shirt with short sleeves accompanied by loosely fitted white shorts, that would barely reach his knees. _I had no idea what I would wear considering all my clothes were downstairs..._

"We also have a small problem..." I added in, watching as Gold sat on the edge of the bed. Large golden eyes looked at me expectantly.

"What's that?"

"...all my clothes are downstairs."

I wished that in the heat of the moment my brain actually kicked in and made me remember! Stupid fucking hormones! He smirked playfully, obviously pleased with the image of me sitting around naked because he refused to get the rucksack for me.

"Well isn't that a shame?" He teased.

Frowning I folded my arms, knowing that he was going to be a complete and utter dick now, just to laugh at my misfortunes.

"Fuck you Gold!"

His eyes sparkled with the intent to cause some kind of mischief, whether that was running around the bedroom with my boxers or what. I just knew he was up to no good.

"...yes please." He teased once again, bobbing his tongue at me.

I rolled my eyes in annoyance and turned away from him. At least the old Gold was back, even if he was a complete pain in the ass._ No pun intended._ As my back faced the dark haired boy I felt his arms wrap around my neck pulling me backwards so I ended up lying on the bed yet again.

"Sulking won't get you anywhere, you know?"

His voice was playful, like he was taunting me, and in haste I swiped at his arms that were coiled around my neck.

"Piss off Gold! That is the last time I fuck you!"

As those words passed my lips his arms immediately went limp, allowing me to sit upright again. And then the whining and begging started,

"What? Oh come on Silver! You can't blackmail me with that!"

Combing my fingers through my hair I sighed. _Yes I fucking could!_

"...you started this! Laughing at me, and taunting me. God, you can be such a prick sometimes!"

As my eyes spotted him over my shoulder, large eyes staring at me I turned away, refusing to look at him any longer.

"Awww, well that's just too bad,"

I heard the bed shift, obviously Gold was getting up once again. Then he walked so he was heading towards the door, which lay right in my line of vision. As he sauntered past me, holding his clean clothes in one arm he shot me a cheeky smile.

"I guess I'll just have to take a bath all on my own then,"

With a wiggle of his eyebrows he left the room, leaving just me all alone with my own demonic thoughts for company. Closing my eyes tightly I tried to breathe properly.

_Fucking Gold! How dare he do this to me! _

Placing my hands to my face I opened my eyes, wondering what the hell I should do next.

_Should I follow him? Was he implying that I follow him? Man, I didn't know anything any more._

Sighing heavily I combed my fingers through my hair, trying to figure out exactly what Gold meant. Was this a subtle hint for me to go with him? Or what if he genuinely didn't want me there? Biting my lip I decided that just sitting around moping about it wasn't going to solve anything, so nervously I stood up feeling so very exposed right now, and made my way to the open door.

Sadly for me the bathroom was located across the hall so that meant I would literally have to sprint out of the room in-case Gold's mom was lurking around. The thought of her appearing and seeing me in my birthday suit wasn't what I wanted right now. Peeking out from behind the door I took a deep breath to steady my nerves. Now the chances of her appearing at exactly the right moment were very slim, but still there was a possibility.

Grumbling under my breath I noticed that the bathroom light was on and Gold's voice radiated out of the room. It seemed like he was singing or something. Now I needed to find out what was going on.

Cautiously I stepped out of the room, feeling a slight chill attack my bones as I rushed towards the bathroom door. Once I reached the door safely I exhaled, feeling a wave of relief flood throughout my body. With a gentle push the door swung open and begrudgingly I trudged inside.

* * *

Gold sat there, surrounded by a mountain of bubbles in the bath, golden eyes looking at me with a curious interest. As I closed the door behind me I noticed he kept his eyes focused on me, on my face, and then they wondered lower. I watched as a pleasing smirk washed over his features.

"I thought I said I was going to bathe alone," He toyed with me, stretching his body out in the water so one of his legs protruded out of the bath, sexily flashing the smooth honey coloured skin. I swallowed hard, trying so hard not to get an erection because damn it would be noticeable.

"Shut up, I needed one too!" I defended, walking towards bubble mountain with Gold laying right in the centre of it. His hands cupped together, capturing some of the bubbles before childishly blowing them in my direction.

"You could have waited until I was done," Gold retorted, moving his legs slightly so I could get in the bath with him. When I settled my body in the water I hissed at the temperature.

_Fuck it was hot! How was Gold not boiling right now? _

After a lot of huffing and puffing I finally managed to sit down, legs moving either side of Gold. He smiled at me innocently, playing with the bubbles that surrounded us. He could be such a kid sometimes.

"What's with bubble mountain?" I enquired, flinching every time Gold blew bubbles in my face. As he splashed around in the hot water he answered me;

"Now, come on Silver, a bath is not a proper bath without bubbles!"

Oh, was that so? Using my own hands I managed to capture some, and then forcefully blew them in Gold's face, watching as some of them clung to the tip of his nose. He blinked wildly for a few seconds before laughing uncontrollably. I watched as he ignored the fluffy substance that lingered on his nose, maybe he hadn't noticed?

"You have bubbles on your nose," I pointed out, smirking.

Gold's eyes tried his best to see the tip of his nose only giving the appearance of looking drunk, and I swear it made me laugh. It was so fucking stupid. Eventually he managed to wipe them off, trying his best to scowl at me.

"Hey, no fair!"

"You created the bubbles in the first place!" I remarked, feeling the smoothness of his legs against my own. He shrugged weakly before resting his forehead against my chest.

"I wish... this could last forever."

As my arms came up to embrace the dark haired boy I wondered what he meant, this moment, or us?

"What do you mean?"

As his own arms wrapped around me, gently rubbing circles into my back he sighed.

"Being with you like this...but I know it won't."

The side of face now pressed against my chest as we embraced, feeling the water gently lap against our sides. It was true, I couldn't promise it would last forever but I wanted it to. I wanted Gold to always be happy, he just didn't seem the same when he was unhappy.

"How do you know it won't?"

Large golden eyes looked up into my own as his whole face seemed to just crumble right in front of me. _Was he really that worried over me?_

"Do you really think destroying Cyan will be that easy? Do you really think he hasn't planned any of this out?! He is trying to kill you, Silver!"

The last words Gold cried out, closing his eyes as he buried his nose into my chest, arms tightening around me. Nuzzling into his dark hair I sighed. Maybe that was what he told Gold, but I wasn't going to let that happen. I was stronger than Cyan I knew that, so if he tried anything I would be ready. Only Gold didn't seem as confident as I was.

As I embraced him I felt his chest heave painfully against me, like all the pain and suffering was causing his body to implode on itself.

"I will do what I have to do... I made this mess, so I will be the one to sort it out."

Weak fingers desperately clawed at my back as Gold tried to get closer to me, if that was even possible. One minute he was all flirty, and now he was feeling down and depressed. _Why was that?_

"Just...be careful... please." Gold begged me, his face moving so he could look at me. I nodded weakly, not wanting to see that look in his eyes any longer.

"Okay... I will, now can we please not talk about this any more?"

A small smile crept across his face as he nodded. I didn't want this subject ruining my mood, or this moment. I had never bathed with Gold before, and to be honest it wasn't so bad.

We bathed fairly innocently after that, only allowing our dirty minds wonder when we would take turns washing the other, but that soon passed. It was actually quite peaceful doing this, something that was once alien to me. I reckoned I should bathe with Gold more often.

He was the first one out of the bath, quickly wrapping a towel around his waist while shaking his wet hair in the same way a dog shakes it's fur. Right now I couldn't exactly go anywhere, my clothes were downstairs.

"Can you get my rucksack for me?" I asked, watching as Gold eyed his reflection in the mirror curiously, before smiling cheekily.

"Go and get it yourself, what did your last slave die of?"

I rolled my eyes, before placing a hand to my head. _Was he is really just trying to be annoying?_

"Gold.. I can't go into the living room naked! What if your mom is there?!"

He turned to face me, and then shrugged half heartedly.

"Well that's just too bad,"

I watched as he bobbed his tongue at me, and for that instant I wanted to rip it out of his throat! Bastard. I had to think of something to come back with, something that would make Gold think twice about the decision he was making. Then it hit me.

"Fine...I'm banning sex starting from now."

Gold's eyes widened as his mouth went limp. I had a feeling that would work.

"Hey! That is not fair!"

"So is refusing to get my rucksack," I returned, lying back in the water so my hair floated amongst it's depths. He sighed, and ran a hand through his mop of wet hair.

"This is so fucking unfair!"

I smirked, closing my eyes briefly while I just absorbed all the frustrated grunts and sighs that escaped into the open air. It was so pleasing to my ears.

"Fine! You fucking win! I'll go and get your stupid rucksack,"

As I cracked open one of my eyes I could see Gold drying off using the towel, mumbling incoherent words under his breath. Ah, it felt good to win an argument for once. The dark haired boy got dressed quite quickly before giving me an annoyed glance, then he left the bathroom in haste.

Releasing a soft sigh I allowed the warmth of the water wash away any of the negative feelings that coursed through my mind about today's upcoming events. There was no way to avoid this situation, it was set in stone, all I had to do now was find out where he was. Cyan was clever, devious and sneaky so finding him wasn't going to be easy.

Unless he wanted me to find him.

The bathroom door swung open to reveal Gold standing there, wet hair clinging to the sides of his face as he slammed the rucksack down on the cold marble tiles. He was obviously unhappy with me right now, but he would get over it soon enough.

Sitting upright in the bath I watched as Gold sat down on the toilet seat, huffing and puffing in annoyance.

"I am so glad my mom didn't catch me doing that,"

"Doing what?" I questioned.

Golden eyes stared at me for a moment before he looked away.

"Getting your rucksack! I didn't want her asking me twenty questions about what happened last night!"

I honestly didn't think of that. Weakly I shrugged, as I reached forward and pulled the plug from the bathtub. It made a horrible gurgling sound as the water started to disappear.

Standing up I felt a frightful cold shiver dance down my spine, and Gold seemed to notice right away. He grabbed one of the towels that sat comfortably on the warm radiator and passed it to me, without uttering a word. I accepted it graciously, wrapping it tightly around my waist as I stepped out of the bathtub. The towel was lovely and warm, so nice in fact it caused a soft sigh to escape my lips.

"So, what was your mom doing then?" I asked, reaching out for another towel to dry my hair off with. Gold tapped his foot absent-mindedly against the marbled tiles as he spoke.

"Cooking breakfast I suppose."

_ Now why the sudden change of heart? Was she planning to poison my food or something to make sure I wouldn't be able to deflower her son ever again? It seemed a likely scenario._

As I scrubbed my hair with the towel I watched Gold intently, once again that sorrowful look appeared in his eyes and I just knew it was about today's events. He was worried, and it was so obvious.

"Why would she do that?" I asked.

Gold shrugged.

"I don't know, maybe she has come round to the idea. Or maybe she is trying to blackmail me with pancakes,"

Once my hair was sufficiently dry enough I started to rummage through my rucksack. The main objective was to try and find a pair of matching socks, which right now seemed to be the hardest thing in the world. _How did I always end up losing only one of them?_

"I bet she didn't even know it was you last night because of the haircut," Gold stated as I managed to find one black sock, and started my search for another.

"Maybe, but still my face hasn't changed or anything."

"You know what my mom is like, it takes her forever to remember some-one's name, let alone how they look."

That was a valid point, and Gold was like that sometimes.

Finally, after literally emptying the rucksack's contents all over the tiles I managed to find that one elusive black sock. It didn't take long to find the rest of the clothes I wanted to wear, and I settled for a plain black loosely fitted shirt, and black jeans. Well, I liked the colour black.

"I still don't think she approves of me trying to have sex with you on her sofa." I commented, as I adjusted the black shirt on my shoulder's before buttoning it up. Gold shrugged, head in his hands, watching my every move.

"I don't think anyone would approve of that, but once I tell her we weren't doing anything she will be fine. Just wait and see!"

I didn't understand how the dark haired boy had so much faith, but instead of protesting I just stayed quiet, figuring I should trust him for once. I pulled on my black cotton boxers, quickly followed by the black denim jeans, earning a shake of the head from Gold.

"Seriously Silver, don't you own anything that isn't black?"

"Honestly? No." I shot back, buttoning up the garment before adjusting them and flattening any creases. He sighed.

"Do you have a phobia against colours?"

"No, I just like dark clothing. Is that such a crime?" I remarked coldly, picking up the towels that lay on the floor and returning them to their place on the radiator to dry off. The dark haired boy shook his head, as golden eyes burrowed deep into the very core of my soul.

"Well, I suppose it wouldn't be you if you were walking around in bright yellow t-shirts or anything." Gold joked, chuckling the mental image was amusing to him.

Rolling my eyes I quickly shoved the remaining clothes that were on the floor back into the rucksack and slung it over my shoulder. As Gold stood up I gave a swift nod of my head.

"Shall we make a move then?"

"I guess we don't have a choice, do we?"

* * *

The living room was shrouded in this intoxicating aroma that smelt like a combination of cake mixture and butter. Still, it wasn't a horrible smell, it just smelt like home. It was weird.

I placed my rucksack down on the carpet, just in front of the sofa as Gold sauntered past me into the kitchen. Obviously he wanted a private conversation with his mother so I made no objections. Cautiously I sat on the sofa, grabbing the remote that was laying on the coffee table.

Switching the television on I wondered what kind of programmes were on in the morning. Crystal used to complain all the time about morning television, and how they were mainly about middle aged women gossiping about how horrible men were, or DNA tests to find out who was the father of their baby, and so forth. I honestly tuned out every time she spoke of it, but now I was beginning to understand her complaints.

_Why on Earth would people take time out of their days to go on a programme just to find out who the father of their baby was? Why didn't they just keep it in their pants for once?_

Sighing to myself I rested my head back against the cushions, hearing faint sounds of talking. It was Gold and his mother, and no raised voices were heard so perhaps the conversation was going smoothly.

"Mom...I am sorry about last night," I heard Gold's small voice.

There was a pause.

"I am sorry too dear, its just... after everything that you have been through I have been so worried over you."

I zoned out from the annoying brash voice of a teenage girl, desperately claiming she only slept with one man and that he was the biological dad, to the more interesting conversation between mother and son.

"I am fine mom, honestly...I couldn't be better!"

"Is it because of that boy?" She asked, and I felt goosebumps erupt over my pale skin for a moment. I hated people talking about me.

There was another pause.

"Yes mom, it is. Do you.. think it's wrong?"

My eyes diverted to the direction of the kitchen, not able to see anything right now. They must have been out of view.

"I will be honest with you dear, it isn't what I had in mind for you. But, if this is what makes you happy then... who am I to deny you of that?"

At that moment I smiled. I couldn't help it. She was willing to put aside her negative feelings just so her son could be happy? I had never known that before, especially with my family.

_My dad would have gone spare, and he probably would have called me Silvia for the rest of my wretched life..._

"He does...I am happy with him,"

"Then that is all I need to know."

It felt like a massive weight had just been lifted from my shoulder's. At least I knew I wasn't going to be kicked out of the house or anything, but still, maybe I should apologise for what I did?

"But Gold... please try to control yourself. I don't want to see you two trying to have sex on my sofa ever again. Do you understand?"

"Yes mom, I'm sorry. It won't happen again."

I really wanted to laugh, but I couldn't. Truthfully I didn't know why I found it all so amusing, maybe it was just the way she said it?

"I am just glad you are back to your usual bubbly self, I never want to see you so depressed ever again. If that boy is the cause of your happiness then...I will try to accept it as best as I can,"

That smile lingered on my face because for once in my stupid wretched life I felt important. I was the one who was making Gold happy. I was the one who made his heart flutter whenever he cast eyes on me. That was something to be proud of.

"Thanks mom,"

My eyes flickered back to the television set watching some tall man dressed in black read out the DNA results, and what a surprise it was. Turns out the girl was lying and the guy she was with wasn't the dad to her child. _What a plot twist_! Then there was a big uproar involving the guy shouting and screaming, only to be hauled away by big burly security guards. _Man, this show sucked._

"What are you watching?" Gold's voice entered my ears as he sat beside me. I shrugged, not really taking an interest in this stupid programme.

"I now understand why Crystal hates morning television," I commented, watching as the girl wailed like a baby, claiming that the DNA test was wrong. _What an idiot._

"She complains about it but watches it anyway, I really don't understand that girl sometimes," Gold mused, chuckling softly.

_But wasn't I doing the same thing right now? The curse of morning television. _

I turned to face the dark haired boy, noticing that his hair was starting to dry and pieces of it had curled softly around his face. In this light he could be called cute and it would have fit the description perfectly.

"Neither do I, anyway is everything cool with your mom?"

Gold nodded, a large smile smothering those features. It was so nice to see him so happy, so at ease and I knew somewhere deep inside that smile was mostly likely going to fade again, at some point.

"She is fine with it, as long as we don't trying fucking on the sofa again,"

Well obviously, I think I learned from my mistake.

"At least she isn't going to kick you out."

Gold chuckled, playfully hitting my arm.

"My mom isn't that much of an ogre you know! She was just worried over me because I haven't been myself lately...you know, when you left?"

I looked away briefly, my eyes diverting to the carpet. That was one thing I would regret forever. I never wanted Gold to suffer because of me, yet I succeeded in doing just that.

"I am sorry,"

"It's okay, I understand now. I guess...I punished myself because somewhere inside me I blamed myself for losing you,"

Frowning to myself I wondered why Gold blamed himself for this, all this was my fault not his. It was all my fault Cyan had this grudge against me and wanted to destroy everything good in my life.

"Ah, hello there!" Came the melodious voice of Gold's mother, who sauntered into the living room.

Her amber eyes never left mine as a look of concern flashed across her face for a moment, before she smiled. Gold and her had the same smile, and it warmed the core of my heart.

"Hey," I mumbled, not quite knowing how to have a friendly conversation with Gold's mom. She clasped her hands together, releasing a puff of white dust into the air. Probably from the baking or whatever it was that she was doing.

"Are you hungry?"

_Was she talking to me?_

I glanced at Gold for a moment who edged me to respond. After some thought I decided that the idea of her putting arsenic in my food was ridiculous.

"Yeah, a little."

Gold smiled at me as his mom nodded quickly before escaping into the kitchen once again. I sighed, talking to Gold's mom was actually harder than I thought._ What if she thought I wasn't good enough for her son?_ So many questions wreaked havoc in my mind, which caused me to place my head in my hands. Gently Gold rubbed my tense shoulder.

"What's wrong?"

"What if your mom doesn't think I am good enough for you?"

Golden eyes widened at my question before he chuckled.

"Don't be silly Silver! She would never think that! You are making me happy, so in her eyes that is more than enough."

I sure hoped so.

My eyes flickered to the television screen to watch an advert that caught my attention. It was about people who were suffering from schizophrenia and the major signs to look out for. The word delusions came across the screen and suddenly I had this horrible headache consume my brain cells.

_ Delusions...how would anyone know if they were seeing delusions? To them it would seem real! Now this just confused me even more._

"You just need to relax a little, and forget about this whole Cyan situation." Gold remarked, his hand still steady on my shoulder. He was right of course, perhaps over thinking about the situation wasn't doing me any favours right now.

"I know... I know," I mumbled, watching as the advert came to an end, sending a horrible cold shiver down my spine. For some reason it just freaked me out.

_ Imagine if you had that problem? How would anyone cope with it?! Deep inside I was grateful I only had Cyan to deal with._

* * *

Soon after that conversation had ended both Gold and I were summoned into the kitchen, where a plate full of pancakes awaited us. To tell the truth I had never actually ate pancakes and usually lived off toast or cereal for breakfast, so it was a nice change.

And what was even nicer was the fact the three of us conversed politely around the dining table, not raising a voice or knocking anything over in rage. It was something I was not used to.

Breakfast when I was a child involved my dad throwing plates at my head whenever I wouldn't eat all my food, and then ordering me to clean up the mess. So, this was a complete contrast. And I loved it.

We talked about many things, about Gold's habits and how long I had known him, to where we saw our relationship going and did we both want that in the future. Gold had seemed shy to speak about it at first so I decided to confess. It was something that had once crossed my mind, but ever since the Cyan issue I just thought it was nothing more than a dream. But maybe when all this was over that could be something to look forward to.

Gold's mom smiled at the both of us when we talked about our childhood and how Gold used to piss me off all the time with his stupid phoney voices, and childish pranks. Apparently that was just how Gold rolled, according to his mom.

Then the conversation moved on to our reunion at the Pokemon Centre and how somehow Gold managed to make a perfectly clean conversation sound dirty. I watched as she laughed every so often along with us, while we bantered. Gold of course would protest and say it was all my fault, and that I knew damn well what I was doing. Then I would going all prissy on his ass and demand he apologise to me for saying that, and the cycle would never end. But everyone seemed happy, and there were no negative feelings around the dining table, even after breakfast was finished.

As Gold's mom collected the plates I heard a soft ringing sound coming from the living room. It sounded like the phone.

"I'll get it!" Gold practically sang as he bounded out of the kitchen like his life depended on it.

_What was it, another prank call?_

As I poked my head into the living room I watched as Gold snatched the phone from the hook.

"Good morning! This is the Sausage Filling Factory, what can I do for you today?"

Cringing I seriously hoped it wasn't anyone important, and at least it wasn't me this time. His face contorted from a smile to deflated when he obviously realised who was calling.

"Crystal?! Shit... sorry! Yeah, it's out of habit you see. What? Yes, I am fine stop worrying over me!"

I leant against the wall, watching as Gold started to pace around the living room, phone pressed up against his ear as obviously Crystal demanded to know literally everything that was going on. He flinched involuntarily when her voice raised in pitch.

"Calm the fuck down will you?! Yes, Silver is right here!" He bellowed, indicating to me with his hand.

"What? You're...not serious!"

I straightened up when I saw a look of desperation on Gold's face.

_What had happened? Was it Red, did something happen?_

Golds eyes flickered to me for a moment before returning to look at the floor.

"Okay, yes...I'll tell him. But keep out of it Crystal, I don't want you getting involved with this,"

And now the gears of my mind started to fit into place. It had to be about Cyan, it just had to be. Why else would Gold tell Crystal to stay out of it. Oh well, the dream was nice while it lasted.

Gold said his goodbye's and placed the phone on the hook, sighing deeply as he combed his fingers through his hair.

"It's about him...isn't it?" I mumbled, trying to stop my voice from completely failing me. As large sorrowful golden eyes stared into my own he could only muster a weak nod.

_ I knew it! But how did Crystal know where he was?_

"Where is he?"

There was a pause, like Gold didn't really want to tell me his whereabouts.

"He is not too far from here...apparently Crystal saw him heading towards Cherrygrove City,"

So, Cyan knew where I was and was coming to get me? Well, if that was how things were meant to be then I had no choice. Folding my arms I chewed the inside of my lip in thought. _So was he definitely heading to Newbark Town?_

"Is he coming here?"

"According to Crystal he is already on his way...somehow he knows you are here."

Clenching my hands into fists I decided that I needed to leave as soon as possible. I didn't want him knowing where Gold lived in-case he wanted to cause trouble. I had to lure him away from the town if only to ensure Gold and his mom stayed well out of it.

I slipped my shoes on, preparing myself for today's events.

"I have to go,"

As I walked past Gold he held my arm softly.

"Wait! You left your Pokeballs upstairs!"

I sighed heavily, knowing he was right.

"Yeah,"

"Wait here and I'll get them."

And with that said Gold ran past me to make his journey up the stairs to his bedroom. Running my fingers through my hair I wondered just how close he was. And how the hell did he know I was at Gold's house. Biting my lip I found myself wanting to punch something, anything.

_This was too soon, I needed more time. I wasn't ready!_

Closing my eyes briefly I took a deep breath to steady my nerves.

_Get a grip! I could do this! It was only Cyan, I could do this!_

The next sound I heard was footsteps hammering down the stairs as Gold came rushing into the living room, out of breath. He handed me my Pokeballs cautiously before taking a huge gulp of air.

"Just...promise me you'll be careful,"

"Am I anything but careful?" I mocked as I shoved the Pokeballs in my pocket.

He rolled his eyes and forced a smile, but I just pretended not to notice. Subconsciously puffing my chest out I decided it was now or never and started to make my way to the front door.

As my fingers danced over the handle I paused. Gold trusted me, he believed in me to do this for me, and for us. What if I failed him? Furrowing my brow I shook my head before opening the door slowly.

"Silver!" Gold's voice called to me just before I left, causing me to spin around to face him. His whole face lit up like he was the only light source in the room, and his eyes sparkled with tears that threatened to fall from them.

"I love you,"

I smiled weakly, feeling my heart flutter delicately inside my chest. And I loved him, so much it hurt. Nodding weakly I decided that I might not have the chance to ever say this, to actually confess that I loved him too. So, I told him.

"I love you too, Gold."

And before he had a chance to reply I was out of the house like a bullet, closing the door swiftly behind me.

* * *

The morning air was chilly and positively spring like. It was strange considering it was meant to be the middle of summer, but still being pleasantly cool wasn't something I hated. Inhaling the morning air I decided to think about my next course of action.

_Where would Cyan be lurking?_

I sighed heavily, feeling the cool breeze tousle my hair before it disappeared into the atmosphere. Clenching my hands into fists I took a deep breath before walking away from the safety of Gold's house, and out into the wilderness that was Cyan's awaiting trap.

I made my way towards Cherrygrove City just like Crystal had said. If Cyan was around then he wouldn't be too far from there. Swallowing hard I could almost feel the heat radiate off my partners, like they were right there with me, ready to fight. But even though I had their support I didn't want them to get hurt either, but Cyan was leaving me with no choice.

As the grass crunched underneath my feet I noticed a short cut to Cherrygrove City. It was a dimly lit alleyway that no-one ever seemed to use. If I cut through there then getting to Cherrygrove would be a lot easier.

So I made my way through the thickets and foliage and headed towards the opening of the alleyway.

* * *

I was immediately met with the horrible intoxicating stench of sewage water and rotting food as I stepped foot inside. It was making my stomach knot violently with nausea. Then I heard a squelch underneath my feet. Looking downwards I noticed I had just trodden in what looked to be excrement of some kind, and immediately felt my stomach flip inside me. Closing my eyes briefly I shuddered and continued walking through the slime infested alleyway.

"Hello, Silver,"

A horrible chilling voice caused me to stop and face the direction. In the dim light I could barely make out a silhouette, leaning against the wall, tossing something up and down only to catch it again. But that voice I knew immediately and instinctively I straightened up. There was no way he was going to catch me off guard, not this time.

"Cyan."

The sound of his name dancing off my tongue sent a horrible shiver running down my spine. I knew why he was here, so why was he merely biding his time? His dark figure moved away from the wall and started to walk towards me.

"I had a feeling I would find you here," He toyed with me, his voice having an undertone of disgust. I clenched my hands into fists, preparing myself for any of his attacks.

"Why are you even here Cyan?" I challenged, my voice echoing off the empty ill omened walls.

He chuckled darkly until his face became illuminated by the natural light that flooded in through a crack in one of the walls. His eyes were darker than I remembered and dark circles encased them, while his face was gaunt and fragile just like Gold had been. His arms were skinny and looked like they would snap if I merely touched them.

"I am sure you know exactly why I am here, you will not get away with what you did to my little brother!"

I moved so my back was pressed against the wall. Cyan neared me, smiling a smile the devil would be proud of. His dark hair hung in thick tresses around his face, only stressing the evident cheek bones even more. I smirked, trying to hide my apprehension as he neared me.

"Give up Cyan, you have already lost."

Then he bowed his head and started to laugh. I watched every move he made, keeping my eyes focused when he moved away from me, laughing like I had told him the funniest joke in the world. Then cold dark emotionless stared right into the very heart of me.

"You are right Silver... I have lost."

My eyes widened at hearing those words. Was he being serious? Then that blood-curdling smile smothered his malignant features only to suddenly rip my whole world apart yet again. Once again he neared me, his body language giving off this threatening aura that I just couldn't shake off.

"I lost...the moment my brother ever met you... I lost...when you told my brother to stop being a trainer... I lost...when he decided to take his own life by overdosing on a bunch of pills,"

His face became dangerously close to mine as his eyes narrowed.

"I lost...when you killed my baby brother!"

His hand grabbed my wrist harshly, pushing it up against the wall. My eyes focused on his, seeing that sickness and evil had literally eaten him away from the inside, and now all I saw was this horrible demon, trying to destroy my soul.

The grip on my wrist intensified as I hissed. Even though he was so skinny he had some strength in those bones.

`"So why don't you fucking kill me and get this over with?!" I spat angrily, feeling my heart quake inside me. His face morphed into a heart wrenching smile.

"Now why would I do a thing like that?"

He was toying with me, messing with my head.

His other hand came up and cupped my chin, tilting my head to the side so his eyes could drink in this image of me, fragile and helpless right now. Biding my time was something I was never good at.

"Isn't it what you want?"

Cyan shook his head slightly, admiring the look on my face before he let go.

"Killing you would never suffice, it would never truly satisfy my burning desire for revenge,"

I blinked, feeling my heart race inside my chest.

_ So, he didn't want to kill me?_

"So...what do you want?!" I demanded, as I managed to struggle free from his death hold on my wrist.

Once again he laughed, a manic laugh that bounced off the walls like a banshee's wail.

"I will destroy EVERYTHING you love!"

I swallowed hard, still finding myself backed up against the wall while Cyan paced back and forth, hand to his chin, thinking.

"Now... the question you will have to ask yourself is...who will I target first?"

I stiffened, knowing there were only a few people who Cyan would target, and he had already tried to kill one of the people I knew.

"Why? Why did you attack Red?!" I shouted, demanding answers.

Cyan's emotionless eyes glanced at me for a moment before snorting at my question.

"He was a complication, always in the way. I had to get rid of him,"

"What, by smacking him over the head with a cricket bat?!"

My voice raised in pitch as I felt my Pokeballs twitching in anger in my pocket. Soon I would unleash hell on this prick, and there was no way he was getting out of this alive.

I moved away from the wall slightly, watching as Cyan continued to glare at me like a hawk, his expression never changing.

"I couldn't have him telling you my plans, he had to be disposed of,"

I closed my eyes briefly, feeling an overwhelming surge of anger rush through me.

_How dare he talk about Red like he was a nobody! Red was the fucking champion!_

"Too bad for you he is still alive, and I swear... when he gets out of there you will wish you were never fucking born!"

Cyan laughed and it caused every cell in my body to shudder violently. _Why was that laugh just so unbearable?_

"I have a feeling he won't ever be coming out of there, in fact, I would almost bet on it."

That was it, I couldn't hold it any more.

Angrily I lunged at the dark haired boy, coiling my arms around his neck tightly, trying to squeeze the life out of him. His fingers dug into my skin, making me hiss in pain but I refused to let go. Strangled whines escaped his throat as my arms pulled tighter with all the strength I had.

_ This little bitch was going to fucking die! _

Then I felt a sharp elbow pummel into my ribs, knocking the wind out of me. Coughing slightly I let go of the dark haired boy, watching as he stumbled to the ground. Grunting I rubbed the area he jabbed, hoping to God it wouldn't bruise.

"So violent aren't we Silver? Too bad your dad didn't knock some sense into that dumb brain of yours,"

I froze, my eyes widening as I beheld Cyan's demonic figure rise from the ground like some kind of otherworldly creature.

_ How the fuck did this guy know about my dad?!_

Gritting my teeth I tried to ignore the burning hot sensation that threatened to unleash itself from within.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT!" I screamed at him.

He smirked and went to lean against the wall, arms folded.

"Touchy subject is it?" He taunted me, raising an eyebrow in sheer disgust.

That was it, I didn't want to hear any more of this bullshit!

Grabbing a Pokeball from my pocket I released the first thing that came to hand. And as the bright light faded I noticed I had chosen Gold's Typhlosion. He snorted and puffed out a circle of smoke at Cyan before standing beside me, looking ready for the battle.

"You better fucking be ready for this you asshole, this shit is about to get real!" I challenged, hearing Typhlosion roar in agreement.

Cyan sighed as he shifted from the wall, not looking intimidated in the slightest.

"Do you seriously think you can beat me? Wow, you're even more deluded than I thought,"

"JUST FUCKING BATTLE ME!" I cried out, stomping my foot as Typhlosion did the same.

Once again Cyan rolled his eyes and pulled out a golden looking Pokeball from his belt. With a smirk of his mouth he threw the ball into the air only to reveal a Blastoise. My mouth dropped open.

_Crap! A water type?_

"As you insist, but you won't beat me with puny Pokemon like that, and to make it fair... let's use only two Pokemon,"

My fists trembled with rage.

_ How dare he insult Gold's Pokemon! They were stronger than my own! And he was going to find that out the hard way!_

Deep inside I tried to rack my brains for any attacks Typhlosion might know, after all, I wasn't used to having fire types. But I had to have faith in him, just like Gold did in me.

"Blastoise hit that wimp with a Hydro Pump!" Cyan cried out, pointing not at Typhlosion but at me.

_Wait... what?!_

I watched as the large turtle Pokemon got it's cannons ready, taking aim before giving a giant roar and allowing gallons of water to blast in my direction.

_ Eyes widening I thought to myself this wasn't right! Why was he attacking me?!_

As the water neared me I cringed, covering myself as best as I could with my arms, waiting for the onslaught. Only it never came.

"Phhhlooooo~"

Opening my eyes I saw that Typhlosion had stood in front of me and was trying to deflect the water backwards with his arms. He was struggling, and slowly losing his footing on the soft ground. Over the surge of the water I heard Cyan laughing like the maniac he was.

"You idiot! Do you want to get your Pokemon killed?!"

I cringed, hearing Typhlosion's wail as the water started to weaken him. Blastoise didn't show any signs of letting up and deep inside I wondered if Gold had told him to do this.

_ Did he tell Typhlosion to protect me?_

I wanted him to stop and just let it hit me, but he wouldn't. He was determined, I could see it in his eyes.

Standing up tall I decided to try to do something, anything.

"Typhlosion, use Smokescreen!"

And as if by magic the whole of the alleyway became shrouded in this horrible thick black mist which was choking to some degree. I couldn't even see my hand in front of my face and I only hoped Typhlosion was okay.

"Blaaaasssst!" Blastoise cried as something went crashing into the ground.

I didn't know who it was and immediately my heart started to quicken in my chest.

_ Please... don't let it be Gold's Pokemon!_

Then I saw a flash of light as a burning ball of fire cascaded down the alleyway before crashing into something solid, once again hearing a wail from Cyan's Pokemon. _Was Typhlosion doing this all on his own?_

"Ah! Blastoise! Don't aim at me you idiot!" Cyan cursed, and I wished in this smoky haze I could find him and murder him, but no such luck. He was on the other side of the battlefield, far away from me.

Then another flash of fire emerged from the haze only to crash into what I assumed was Blastoise. Gold had trained him so well.

"Phhhlllooooo!" He cried frantically, alerting me immediately.

_What did that mean?! Was he hurt? _

Coughing violently I tried to see through the dark mist, I wanted to know he was okay. How could I tell? Then I ducked suddenly, barely avoiding a blast of water that was aimed at my head.

_Shit, that was close!_

"Typhlosion use Double Team!" I commanded, remembering that Gold had used this move previously. Even though I couldn't even see him I had a feeling combining these two attacks would make him literally invincible, or at least hard to hit.

"You little shit!" Cyan cried, as Blastoise's Hydro Pump continued to miss, hitting off the walls that surrounded us.

I smirked, actually not believing Typhlosion had an advantage here. Thank God Gold had taught him so well.

As the sounds of Pokemon fighting echoed off the walls I had started to noticed the smokescreen was finally dying down, allowing me to see more of what was going on. Typhlosion continued to barrage the turtle with Flame Wheels, causing him to get disorientated and dizzy as he followed his blurred image.

_ It was working!_

"Blastoise focus!" Cyan commanded.

The smirk never faded from my lips as again and again Typhlosion charged into the water type, until eventually he fell to the ground with a crash, eyes lolling around in confusion.

Everything went silent as we just watched the defeated water type, and I honestly could not believe Typhlosion did it!

"Phhhlllooooo!" He cried loudly, releasing a blast of flames into the air in victory.

Cyan growled in annoyance before returning his Pokemon to his Pokeball.

"You were lucky that time...I went easy on you," His voice was threatening, and then I saw that horrible devilish grin that literally tore my insides apart.

My eyes looked up at the fire type, watching as it panted for air. He must have really fought hard to win that one. But I was proud nonetheless.

_ One down, one to go!_

"But there is no way you will defeat this one,"

Suddenly the air seemed to get colder the longer we stood around doing nothing, and the hairs on my arms started to stand on end. Cyan clicked his fingers, allowing the sound to resonate off the walls. I watched him intently, wondering what his next move was.

A blur of darkness rushed past me only to reappear at Cyan's side. My mouth hung open limply as the image that stood before me just could not be real.

What my eyes saw was none other than Gold, standing right in front of me, large golden eyes draining me of life. Typhlosion's face softened as he saw the image of his trainer, and I just had this God awful feeling something wasn't right.

"G-Gold?" I choked out, wondering if all of this was just an illusion.

He smiled at me, the same beautiful smile that made my insides ache. He didn't speak, just smiled at me and now I wondered what had Cyan done to him!

"What the fuck have you done?!" I cried at the dark haired boy, who simply waved off my protest.

"I have done nothing, I am merely demonstrating my partner's powers."

_ So, this was... a Pokemon? How was that even possible?!_

Even Typhlosion looked confused, but he never let his guard down not once. Then Gold's smile faded into this horrible evil grin that chilled me to my very core.

_No...it wasn't him...it wasn't!_

"Time to reveal just what you really are!" Cyan called out, and I watched as the body that was Gold transformed into a small black fox with striking blue eyes.

_What sort of Pokemon was this?! It certainly was not native to Johto or Kanto, or even Hoenn!_

The fox, although it was cute was obviously powerful considering it just changed into Gold without hesitation. I watched as Cyan knelt down to gently stroke the fox's ears, and it was the only time I had seen him look like he actually cared about something.

Only that didn't last for very long. Once he stood up again that demonic stare returned.

"This is a Zorua, the master of illusion."

_ Swallowing hard I wondered how I was supposed to fight this thing! I had no idea what type it was or what attacks it had! How did this guy even have something like that?_!

"Phhllloooo~" Typhlosion grunted angrily, stamping his foot into the soft ground.

He wanted to fight again, I could sense it. Biting my lip I couldn't even come up with a strategy here.

_How was I supposed to fight something I knew nothing about?!_

"Zoorrr~" The little fox purred cutely, giving off the impression that it wouldn't harm a fly, only I knew that looks could definitely be deceiving.

"So, are you going to use Typhlosion again or are you going to use something else?" Cyan challenged me, his expression never changing.

Deep inside I wondered. Typhlosion was injured from that last fight, and if I used another one then it could give me the advantage... some-one I trusted, some-one who I had faith in. There was only one Pokemon that fit that description. As my eyes looked into the large fire type's I smiled weakly.

"Trust me on this, let me use my own partner."

He nodded weakly before emitting a circle of smoke through his nose.

As I returned Gold's Pokemon back to his Pokeball I sighed softly. I would be eternally grateful for all his help. And now I had to fight this battle head on, using the one Pokemon who was my closest friend.

My hand reached into my pocket retrieving the ball and as I threw it into the air I called out;

"Go, Sneasel!"

My trusted ice type appeared in a flash, claws fanned out, ready for battle. Zorua's face crinkled in disgust for a moment before returning to a neutral expression.

"A Sneasel?!" Cyan mocked, laughing after his words. "...the same filthy creature who destroyed my brother's Rattatta!"

It was true, Sneasel had defeated him and it was fucking easy too. I smiled and folded my arms, knowing that she was geared up for the battle and I wanted nothing more than to watch her slice that pathetic fox open.

"And the same creature who is going to destroy you!"

"Sneeee~!" She cried out, immediately lunging towards to black fox.

Luckily for me Sneasel seemed to get a lot of her personality traits from me so she would never back down, no matter how the situation looked.

I watched as she knocked the fox off it's feet and they both scuffed along the soft ground, emitting a puff of dust. When the dust cleared I noticed she had managed to grab the fox by the throat, almost choking it.

"Ice Punch!" I commanded, watching as she swung her clawed hand back as she got ready to strike the dark fox. Only things were never going to be so simple.

Within a flash Zorua had transformed into a Sneasel as well, and the transformation stalled my partner, allowing the attack to miss completely.

"What? How is that even possible?!" I cried out, watching as both Sneasel's wrestled for dominance, clawing at each other and screaming battle cries.

Cyan smirked.

"Zorua is capable of many things, a trainer like you is too weak to understand the true power of what it can do."

Those cursed words rung in my head like a bell chiming.

_'Weak', my dad used to call me that all the time, he used to tell me that things that were weak never got anywhere in life, including weak Pokemon, and for some time I had believed him. Until Gold taught me the error of my ways. Maybe Cyan was the same in that respect?_

Snapping out of my thoughts I watched my Sneasel stand up, panting heavily as she faced opposite the imposter, claws fanned ready to strike.

_ How was I supposed to win this? Did Zorua know her attacks too?_

"Zorua, Agility!" Cyan called out, and my eyes widened when the image of the imposter Sneasel just became a blur, so I knew she would struggle to hit her opponent now.

As she aimlessly tried to pinpoint where the black fox was suddenly she was smashed in the face with a clawed limb, sending her flying across the floor.

"Sneasel!" I cried out desperately, watching as she weakly stood up, shaking slightly but seemingly okay.

"You are more pathetic than I thought," Cyan scoffed, smiling that horrible devilish grin that I just wanted to smack off his face.

Feeling a feral growl erupt in my throat I decided that perhaps I needed to play dirty here.

_ But what kind of strategy could I use against this... thing?!_

"Snnneeeee!" She cried out in protest, before fanning her claws out once again.

The imposter seemed fine, standing tall and completely unharmed while my own was battered and bruised, but still okay._ How long could she keep this up?_

"Quit stalling and make your move!" Cyan growled at me, raising his eyebrow in delight at my misfortunes.

As I turned to face Sneasel I had to think.

_She knew Rock Smash, would that be a good choice? But what if she missed again?! God... my head hurt._

Large eyes stared at me and just nodded, she had faith in me, so I needed to do the same.

"Sneasel smash that imposter with Rock Smash!" I commanded, watching as she leapt into the air, preparing to strike down Cyan's partner.

Zorua smiled, until a shock wave of black dust emitted outwards, hitting Sneasel straight on, knocking her once again to the floor.

_What attack was that?! I had never seen that before!_

"What the hell was that?!" I cried out, watching as my beloved partner struggled to get up off the ground, her limbs trembling with every attempt.

"It's Zorua's signature move called Night Daze, of course some-one as pathetic as you are would never understand how powerful it can be,"

I gritted my teeth, feeling so guilty right now.

Sneasel was in pain and it was all because I couldn't fucking fight this thing! The imposter stood composed, arms folded, waiting for Sneasel to make her move. I doubted she could even stand let alone attack any more, and to be honest I didn't want her suffering.

"Snneee~" She murmured weakly, collapsing to the ground again before attempting a second time to stand. Cyan merely laughed at her actions.

"Like Pokemon... like trainer it seems."

"Shut the fuck up you bastard!"

I clenched my hands into fists, trying to think of something, anything that would get me out of this mess.

"Now... you have made me angry." Cyan murmured, so matter of factly, before waving to his Pokemon.

As his eyes diverted from me for a second I had a feeling he was up to something. Then with a click of his fingers and a smirk of his lips Zorua faced me, the same evil glint in it's eyes.

_Was he... going to attack me now? _

As I watched that black shock wave come charging at me, I just closed my eyes, not moving an inch.

_ I deserved this... it was okay._

And for that moment I felt at ease, I felt calm, until a heart rendering scream shook my insides.

"SNEEEEE~!"

I snapped my eyes open for a moment only giving me enough time to watch another shock wave cascade into Sneasel's body as she leapt in front of me to protect me. My eyes widened as the ice type was blown backwards from the attack into my chest, causing me to fall on the ground.

Her body heaved painfully as I gently cradled her in my arms, watching as her eyes weakly opened to look at me.

_No... why did she...?_

"You idiot!" I cried out to her, trying to fight the tears that threatened to fall down my face.

A small smile scarred her face as weakly she outstretched one of her claws to gently touch my face.

_God...no, I loved her so much.. why did she do that?!_

"You stupid, stupid girl!"

Burying my head into her chest I allowed myself to sob loudly, not being strong enough to hold back the tears. I held her tightly, feeling her breathing get shallower as time progressed, and for that moment it just felt like her and I were in the room, no Cyan... no nothing.

But when I pulled away to look at her face I only had enough time to watch her eyes close, and her claw fall from my face only to become limp and lifeless.

My whole body shuddered violently as I held my partner in my arms, empty and devoid of life. Fresh tears fell down my face as my eyes turned to where Cyan stood, arms folded, looking proud.

_That PRICK! She wasn't...no...she couldn't be...dead...could she?! _

I shook her softly, watching as her head lolled back and forth but nothing happened.

_ She.. risked her life for me...and now I was helpless._

"NOOOOOOO!" I shrieked loudly, holding her body close to me as I rocked backwards and forwards on my heels, not wanting to believe any of this.

_This is not happening... this is not happening! _

I closed my eyes tightly feeling my own tears splash onto her fragile body, dampening her fur.

_This... was all my stupid fault... _

I refused to let her go, even as Cyan approached me to obviously gloat about his victory. I didn't care about any of that any more, nothing else mattered.

_ Sneasel saved my life...and now... she...she was..._

"DON'T LEAVE ME!" I cried out pathetically, tears streaming down my face as I cradled her body like a baby, not wanting to believe it.

_She had always been there for me...never giving up on me even when I was horrible to her. And now... she had saved my life...no...this was all a nightmare!_

A dark shadow overcast on me indicating that Cyan was kneeling down in front of me. I heard a soft sigh escape his lips.

"And now... you know how I felt... when my brother died,"

Blinking through the tears I glared at the dark haired boy, feeling this uncontrollable blood-lust flood my veins, consuming my entire body. I shuddered with power, with fear of what I could actually do to him.

_I wanted to kill him... I wanted to FUCKING MURDER HIM! _

"YOU FUCKING SON OF A BITCH, I'M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU!" I screamed at him, feeling my body tremble with adrenaline.

Murderous thoughts swamped my mind, thoughts of me strangling him, watching as he desperately gasped for air, or thoughts of me stabbing him to death with a knife. That was such a tempting image right now.

Slowly I placed Sneasel's lifeless body on the ground, giving her a small smile. She looked so peaceful, like she was sleeping.

_My heart... why does it hurt?! SOMEONE STOP IT! MAKE IT GO AWAY! _

Hands trembling I dug my fingers into the dirt desperately, trying to stop the tears but they just refused to stop.

Then I noticed something shiny out of the corner of my eye. It looked like a shard of glass, sharp enough to cause some damage. I quickly outstretched my hand, grabbing the hardened edge and pressed it roughly against my palm, feeling just how sharp it was.

_I could easily murder the bitch with this!_

As I held the glass shard in my hand Cyan's face softened for a moment. He gently allowed his fingertips to dance across my cheek, which made me flinch.

"This is a sadness...if you hadn't told my brother to stop being a Pokemon trainer...I might have actually liked you,"

His voice was soft, unlike the tone I was used to.

"...and you have just experienced what unconditional love really is."

I turned to face him, his eyes were lingering on Sneasel's lifeless body as a heavy sigh escaped his lips.

"What the fuck is that meant to mean," I remarked coldly, wiping my face with the back of my hand while the other still held the shard of glass.

Once again Cyan's face softened, like he was almost sorry for what he had done.

"Unconditional love is taking a bullet for some-one you love...protecting them no matter what, and that was what Sneasel just did. She took the bullet... for you,"

Squeezing my eyes shut fresh tears fell down my face and I sunk my teeth into my lip hard.

_I deserved to die! WHY DIDN'T SHE LET ME DIE! _

My heart felt like it was dying from the inside, bleeding out onto the cold soft ground below me. I wished it was, the pain might not have been so bad.

"No...I can't...I just...no.." I mumbled uncontrollably, shaking like a candle in the wind.

_What was I going to do now? She was...dead...and it was all because of me!_

Cyan sighed once again, his cold dark eyes burning into me.

"But of course this is not the end of it," He mused quietly, making me look away in sadness.

S_o killing my beloved partner wasn't enough for this sick bastard?!_

My hand shook as the glass shard dug into my skin.

"You bastard..." I grumbled, feeling my voice shudder with every word.

He smiled, that same smile that chilled me to the core.

"You brought this on yourself Silver, if only you could have kept your trap shut none of this would have happened."

_I knew it was my fucking fault! All of it! Breaking Gold's heart, causing Red's injuries and now.. the death of my beloved partner...it was all because of me... _

I rested my head against the wall, tears still trickling down my face as my chest heaved painfully with every breath. In my mind I wanted to just strike out and stab Cyan with the glass shard, I wanted him to suffer. But I just felt weak, like I was nothing .

_Everything was gone, everything I had worked so hard for..all gone._

Once again Cyan's fingertips lightly brushed my cheek, gently moving strands of my hair out of my face. I flinched slightly, hating the feeling that he gave me.

"If you weren't so pretty I would kill you right now," He said threateningly, his face becoming dangerously close to my own.

But I had no strength left any more, I felt useless and if he wanted to kill me I would welcome it with open arms. But he didn't.

He cupped my face with his hand once again, forcing my eyes to meet his.

"I don't care any more..." I murmured weakly, allowing him to admire the look on my face.

His features softened for a moment before the grip intensified.

"Death is too good for some-one like you."

I closed my eyes for a moment, allowing fresh tears to escape them. He was right, I didn't deserve to die any more. I deserved to live with this guilt for the rest of my miserable existence.

Cyan's grip on my face got harsher as he pushed it forcefully against the wall. I winced slightly but tried not to show any emotions that were ravaging my body right now. He didn't need to know that right now I felt scared, because that would make me weak. And I was not weak.

Then a pair of poisonous lips connected with mine harshly forcing my whole body against the wall.

_I closed my eyes tightly, not wanting to feel this... or taste this horrible sickness that was slowly starting to consume me. _

They were fierce, brutal, almost ripping the skin as his hand moved from my face to yank my hair. I hissed slightly and deep inside I wondered what the fuck was I going to do?

The glass shard felt cool in my hands and before I knew what I was doing I pushed Cyan away and lunged forwards, plunging the shard into Cyan's stomach before scrambling to my feet.

I hugged the wall in shock as I watched him groan in discomfort, black eyes glaring right into me.

"You...you..." He tried, looking down to see the blood start to seep through his clothes where the shard had struck him.

My whole body trembled as I watched the demonic creature fall to the ground, desperately trying to stand up. More blood was spilling out onto his clothes and the ground beneath us as he moved and soon his eyes were becoming half lidded, and his breathing was shallow.

Taking a deep breath I wiped my face with my hands, trying to get rid of this horrible taste, trembling uncontrollably.

_Oh my God.. I just stabbed him...is he... going to die?! _

Without knowing what else to do I returned Sneasel to her Pokeball and shoved it in my pocket before deciding to leave the alleyway. Cyan could stay here and die for all I cared.

But as I made my way to the entrance something heavy and sharp smacked me around the back of the head causing my legs to just give way underneath me.

As I fell to the floor I groaned, allowing a God awful headache to consume my brain before another strike hit me, and then everything went black...

* * *

**Author's Note: And now a moment of silence for Sneasel please *SNIFFS* God...Cyan is such a bastard but is he dead too? And what happened to Silver?! :O It's tense shit! Find out next chapter and please read and review. It makes a girl very happy :)**


	19. Waking Hour

**Author's Note: Hello everyone! I can't believe it's on chapter nineteen already! Shocking! I want to thank all of you for your continues support! It's people like you that help drive me write! So please enjoy the next chapter!**

* * *

**Chapter Nineteen: Waking Hour**

My eyes flickered open to the sound of a blaring siren, piercing my ear drums. My vision was blurred and a mask was covering my mouth, which steamed up every time I exhaled. Someone was leaning over me, their long hair gently ticking my face. I felt weak, like some-one had literally sucked all the life out of me.

An excruciating headache consumed my brain as I tried to envision just who was leaning over me. Thinking was hurting me, so instead of doing anything I shut my eyes, hearing the sirens and the voice of some-one calling my name;

"Silver! Hang on! You'll be okay!"

The voice was familiar but right now I didn't know who it belonged to. All I knew was that we were inside something that was moving and my body felt paralysed.

_Well, at least I was alive right now, even though I wished I had died. I didn't deserve to live, not after everything I had done._

A warm small hand clasped around my own which caused my eyes to flicker open once again. Everything was still blurry and I couldn't focus on anything, but knowing some-one was here with me was slightly comforting.

"Don't worry, you will be fine. The doctors will be able to help you, I promise."

The voice entered my ears again, and now I figured out it was a woman's voice. She squeezed my hand gently as her blurred image sat beside where I lay.

_What the hell was I even lying on?_

Feeling far too weak to stay awake I closed my eyes and allowed a distressing slumber consume my body.

* * *

The next time I opened my eyes I realised that I wasn't moving any more and that a horrible smell of disinfectant stung my nose. The walls surrounding me were white, just like the bed sheets that were draped carefully over my body, and wires were protruding from my skin linking up to various machines that were beeping constantly. I was dressed in a medical gown, which hung off me.

_Had I always been this skinny?_

My eyesight was still blurred but my headache had quietened down slightly so it didn't hurt as much. Weakly I coughed, steaming up the mask that covered my mouth.

"Silver?!"

A concerned voice rung in my ears and before I was aware of it three people were crowded around my bed. All their faces were blurry and unrecognisable, yet somewhere deep inside I had a feeling I knew them. I twitched one of my hands, feeling something pinching my index finger. It was like a peg that people use to put their washing out to dry. But I nodded weakly, wanting to say something, anything. The only thing I could do however was cough, violently.

"Hey, relax Silver."

Closing my eyes for a moment I felt a warm hand place itself on my forehead, testing my temperature. I didn't even know where I was or how long I had been here. But, I wasn't dead. I was very much alive.

Sighing softly I opened my eyes again, trying to focus on the blurry images that stood before me. The only thing I noticed was a mass of blue hair, and my guess told me that it was Crystal. I smiled weakly, before coughing again. It felt as if I had been kicked in the ribs by a Rapidash.

"Don't worry you will get better, I promise." The voice sounded broken, like whoever was saying it was crying.

_Right now I didn't want to get better, I wanted to be with my partner...with Sneasel. But I couldn't. _

I didn't even have the strength to ask about her, or to find out where I was. My whole body was limp and lifeless, remaining deathly still in my prison of whitewashed walls. The incessant beeping noise was starting to grate on my nerves, but I had feeling that was my own heart beat causing it.

"What the hell even happened? Did you see anything?" A feminine voice sounded across the room as I closed my eyes for a moment. All the bright lights were starting to hurt my brain.

"No, I saw him and some-one else lying on the ground so I immediately called for an ambulance,"

My mind zoned in on the conversation while my eyes remained closed, and the hand on my forehead rubbed across my skin gently.

"I bet it was him, that guy who is trying to destroy Silver."

The feminine voice that I recognised started again. She sounded annoyed but I didn't think anything more of it.

"I told him to be fucking careful!" Another voice sounded in my ears which immediately caused my eyes to open.

_That voice...I knew it so well. And he had told me to be careful..._

Slowly a face drew close to my own and as the blurred image faded I realised that it was Gold who was looking at me, with his hand on my forehead. His golden eyes blinked rapidly as the realisation settled in that I actually knew he was here.

"Silver?!" His voice was desperate and weakly I nodded, feeling the warmth withdraw from my head to hold one of my hands gently. Once again I found it almost impossible to speak, the pain in my ribs increasing with every passing second.

"Is he awake?!" Another concerned voice joined the fray, and I noticed that Crystal was here too. It was nice that they both were here, but I didn't deserve it.

_I deserved to die along with Sneasel...I was a failure._

"I don't think he can talk though, but at least he is awake." Gold mused softly, smiling at me as he squeezed my hand lovingly.

"That bastard Cyan, I am so fucking glad he is dead!" Crystal grumbled in annoyance, folding her arms.

_So, he was dead? Did I...kill him?_

I wanted to ask them about it, but every time I tried to speak to felt like some-one was cutting my throat with sandpaper.

"But Silver could have died because of him!" Gold cried out, shaking his head slightly.

The other person in the room I still couldn't see because they were standing too far away, but I assumed whoever it was had called the ambulance. My eyes flickered weakly, watching my two oldest friends talk about the one guy who had completely destroyed my life.

"I know...I am just glad he will be okay."

"Yeah, me too. I just wish... I could have helped him somehow..." Gold muttered quietly, settling his head down on the bed beside my arm, as he held my hand tightly. Crystal gently rubbed his back.

"You did help him! Typhlosion was there! If he wasn't then we might not have found out about what happened."

_So did Typhlosion release himself from the Pokeball when I was unconscious to get Gold?_

My mouth weakly upturned to a smile, eternally grateful for Gold's input in that battle. He really had trained him well.

"That was true...but Sneasel..."

I closed my eyes tightly as her name rung in my ears. I didn't want those horrible image to resurface in my mind.

_I didn't want to watch my best friend die because of me..._

"Nurse Joy is taking caring of that." The other voice entered the conversation, obviously from the person who called the ambulance.

"But...she's in a really bad way, isn't she?" Gold murmured weakly, not moving his head up an inch. There was a heavy sigh.

"She is...but if anyone can help it's Nurse Joy, let's just...hope for the best!"

At that moment I felt incredibly tired, like I had been hit with a dose of Sleep Powder and within a few seconds my mind zoned out of the conversation and had drifted off to sleep.

* * *

When I finally managed to wake up the room was dark. The warmth in my hand remained, and when I managed to look downwards I noticed that Gold was still here, holding my hand with his head down on his arms.

_Was he asleep? _

A small smile crept upon my lips as I managed to squeeze his hand gently. I could just barely make out the soft rise and fall of his chest as he slept, and a part of me wondered why the hospital staff hadn't kicked him out of here yet. The pain in my ribs had subsided and the sandpaper feeling at the back of my throat seemed almost gone, which was a relief. Hopefully I would be able to speak properly soon.

The incessant beeping noise still taunted my ears but it was quieter than it had been, maybe that was because I was now calm. A part of me couldn't believe that Gold had stayed with me all night. He must have been exhausted from all the worrying, and it was all my fault. Sighing softly I glancing up at the ceiling in thought.

_So, Cyan was dead. At least he wouldn't be able to cause any more problems for me, or anyone else. _

"S-Silver..." I heard my name being softly spoken and as my eyes diverted to Gold's sleeping figure I noticed he was waking up. He yawned loudly, his hand still holding my own as his mop of black hair drooped over his face.

"H-hey..." I croaked out, coughing slightly after my words. His body jolted upright as I coughed, golden eyes looking at me with concern.

"I am so glad you are awake, I wondered if you would ever wake up again..."

The moonlight seeping in from the window shone on the one half of his face, illuminating his features for me to see perfectly. I smiled, hearing the beeping of the heart monitor increase.

"...I just...don't want to lose you..." His voice was pained, like he wanted to cry. But instead he smiled weakly at me and squeezed my hand. I was so grateful he was here, even if it was way past visiting hours. No-one seemed to be around so it was okay.

"G-Gold..."

I tried to remove the oxygen mask from my mouth so I could speak clearer, but when the black haired boy noticed he stopped me.

"No, you have to relax."

He was such a worry wart sometimes, but still I smiled. I honestly didn't deserve this though, if he knew everything that happened back in the alleyway he would realise that I wanted to die. My partner got seriously damaged because she loved me, I didn't want Gold doing the same thing.

"I..." I tried, coughing slightly under the strain of talking.

Gently his fingers danced across my face as I closed my eyes. Even after everything he was the only person I could rely on, the only one left to look out for me, and to love me. My chest tightened as he softly kissed my forehead.

"I'm not going anywhere, don't worry." He assured me with a smile.

I sighed softly as the beeping on the monitor increased slightly, indicating that my heart was beating faster for him.

_What the hell did I do to deserve this? Gold was so kind to me, so loving and he never let me down. I wished I could do the same someday._

"G-Gold..."I mumbled, watching as his eyes never left mine.

"Yeah?"

A lump congealed in my throat as a thought flashed across my mind. I didn't want Gold to do what Sneasel had done to save me. If the time ever came I hoped he would save himself. I didn't deserve to be saved.

"If...it ever comes...down to it...don't...s-save me.." I coughed slightly afterwards, feeling the horrible sensation of burning consume my throat once again. His eyes sparkled in the dim light as those words processed in his mind.

"W-what?!"

Of course he would protest, or argue with me about it but it was what I wanted. If Gold died because of me I would never be able to forgive myself. He deserved to survive throughout all this.

"Don't...save me..." I croaked out weakly.

The dark haired boy shook his head as he let go of my hand. He gently cupped my face, fingers softly brushing against my skin as I closed my eyes tightly.

"I love you! You can't ask that of me! I would always save you!" He cried as I leaned into his embrace.

Sighing softly I enjoyed the warmth of his palms against the sides of my face. My heart fluttered delicately inside my chest allowing the machine to beep wildly.

"...I know..."

It pained me to say it, but no matter what I asked of Gold he would always save me, even if I didn't want him to.

_It was like Cyan said...it was unconditional love._

"You're an idiot, you know that?" Gold smiled softly at me before kissing my forehead again. The word's that Cyan spoke of swam through my mind.

_"Unconditional love is taking a bullet for some-one you love...protecting them no matter what..."_

Would I do that for Gold? Yes, definitely. I wouldn't even have to think twice about it. So maybe asking him not to do the same was selfish of me?

"Just get some rest, I'll still be here when you wake up," Gold spoke softly, his thumbs gently caressing my face. As that warmth left it soon reappeared around one of my hands. Sighing softly I relaxed into the embrace of the hospital bed and tried to rest.

I didn't want to be stuck in here forever.

* * *

It took approximately two weeks for my body, and mind to fully recover from my ordeal. Now I was thankful I no longer needed the oxygen mask to breathe, or have wires sticking out of my flesh. I was using this time to just rest up until I was told I could go home. Gold visited me everyday to make sure I was being looked after, and occasionally Crystal showed her face.

I even discovered just who it was that had saved me back in the alleyway. It was Violet, the girl who worked for the local newspaper. Luckily she was walking past when the whole event happened and managed to call for an ambulance.

Apparently the other boy, Cyan, was dead when she got there. But deep within I had this God awful feeling that somehow things weren't over. I really wanted to believe that he was dead and couldn't come back to get at me, and maybe he actually was this time.

_Man.. I was paranoid._

I had been told the good news that within a few days I would be able to go back home. Gold had insisted he stay at my place for a while until I felt better, and even though I protested time and time again he refused to listen to me. In the end I had no other choice but to agree.

When visiting times were allowed I was greeted by an enthusiastic Gold who bounded into the room like an excited puppy, with Crystal following behind. She smiled at me weakly, and I did the same. I was just glad that everyone was safe.

"How are you feeling today?" Gold asked, pulling up a chair to sit beside my bed.

I nodded, finally pleased that the horrible headache had gone and the pain in my ribs had subsided to a dull ache every now and then.

"I'm feeling better than I have for a while,"

He smiled at me. Crystal edged closer to the bed, causing my eyes to focus on her.

"There is some-one else who wants to see you," She murmured, indicating with her hand to the open door.

As my eyes followed I noticed two figures coming inside, one of them being pushed in a wheelchair, his head wrapped in bandage. My eyes widened.

_ It was Red and Green!_

"Red!" I cried out, sitting upright in my bed, watching as Green wheeled him to closer. He smiled sheepishly, those crimson eyes of his looking pained.

"Hey," He replied nonchalantly.

Green rolled his eyes as he pulled up another chair to sit beside Gold.

"How are you holding up?" Green asked me, large emerald eyes gazing at me intently. I shrugged,

"I could be better,"

He flashed a brilliant white smile. Red sighed as he managed to manoeuvre the wheelchair closer to my bedside.

"Good to see you aren't dead." He muttered.

"I could say the same for you." I returned coyly, smiling softly.

He nodded, touching the thick bandages that were wrapped around his head. Obviously from where Cyan had hit him with the cricket bat.

"I am taking care of him, there is no need to worry," Green added, relaxing in his seat.

"Who said I was worrying?" I grumbled.

I didn't really want them knowing that I was glad he was okay, even if he annoyed the hell out of me.

"I'd say the way you are taking care of me is more like mothering me," Red mused, crimson eyes glaring at his lover. Green winked playfully.

"You know you love it."

Red smiled, and it was a genuine happy smile. It was probably the first time I had seen Red so animated, usually he was so boring and pretentious, but when he was around Green it was like seeing a whole new side of him.

"So, have you heard? Apparently that Cyan guy is dead." Crystal added in, still refusing to sit down. Green looked over at the blue haired girl.

"Dead?"

"Yeah, when Violet got there he was already dead. Some-one stabbed him in the stomach,"

I looked away.

_Did anyone know it was me who killed him? Would I get into trouble for that?_

Green sighed, snapping his fingers.

"Damn! I wanted to be the one who killed that little prick!"

"Green..." Red said in a soft voice, raising an eyebrow at the brunette. Gold sighed, running his fingers through his hair. It was a sigh of relief.

"So...is it all over?"

"No..."I muttered, causing everyone in the room to glare at me in shock. "...I don't think he would make it that easy for any of us,"

"So what, is he going to rise from the grave like a zombie or something?" Green joined in, his voice raised in pitch. Obviously Cyan was still on his hit list. Red sighed and placed a hand to his head.

"I think what Silver means is Cyan is cunning, he wouldn't be defeated that easily." Crystal backed me up, placing her hands on the bedposts as she leant on them.

_But if Violet saw his body... then he must be dead... right?_

"But there was a body... surely that is evidence, right?" Red asked softly, looking at the blue haired girl. She shrugged her shoulder's.

"And he was stabbed in the stomach. No-one is going to get up and walk away from that," Green added in, placing his hands behind his head as he balanced on the two hind legs of the chair. Gold sighed, resting his forehead on the side of my bed.

"I just want this shit to be over with..." He groaned.

"Don't we all..." Crystal agreed.

Nobody needed this shit right now, and especially since people were getting hurt because of him.

_Because of me..._

My eyes flickered downwards to my bed sheets, which were coiled around my body.

_Cyan killed my best friend... my partner...if he was still out there...I had to kill him._

"Well if Cyan is still alive...will he come back for round two?" Red asked, looking at me when I finally managed to raise my eyes. I shrugged, not having the slightest idea. I had no idea about any of this, and if he was still alive. It was all just speculation right now.

"He is persistent...like a Growlithe with a bone..." Green grumbled, clicking his tongue in annoyance.

Crystal sighed and looked up at one of the pictures on the wall. Obviously thinking about something.

"I think we just need to stay on our guard for now," She muttered.

That was a good idea, it was better to be safe than sorry. I didn't want anyone else to die. And without thinking I ended up blurting out.

"...I stabbed him..."

All eyes were on me as they burned into my very soul. Gold blinked in confusion.

"You stabbed... him?"

"Yes, I had to..."

I shuddered when I replayed the scenario.

_The scene where __Sneasel died in my arms...the part where Cyan gloated about the fact he had won... and when he had kissed me so forcefully a part of me wondered that if it continued...he might have done to me what my dad did many years ago._

I closed my eyes briefly, trying to keep calm.

"Do you blame him?! I would have stabbed him repeatedly in the face!" Green cried out, forcing the legs of his chair to slam back down on the tiles. Red rolled his eyes.

"Green..."

"Well come on! He tried to fucking kill you! I'd say he deserved everything he fucking got, the prick!"

I smiled weakly, slightly happy that Green would have done the same thing. But nobody knew that Cyan had kissed me, and I didn't really want to tell anyone.

_It made me feel dirty...cheap..._

"Guys! This is not helping matters!" Crystal said sternly, holding her hands up.

I watched as both Red and Green sighed. It was weird how in sync they were, and so easy to tell they loved the bones of one another.

_I wondered if Gold and I would be that close one day, or if we were now?_

"I was just glad Typhlosion came to my house to fetch me when you got hurt! I dread to think what might have happened if he didn't..." Gold murmured weakly, raising his eyes to mine. I smiled feebly, hoping to create a smile on his face. But nothing happened.

"Well let's just be grateful none of us died in any of this." Green added in, now deciding to balance on the two chair legs again.

"Yes, but it's not over, is it?" I piped up, clenching my hands into fists.

_Why didn't Cyan just kill me? It would have made this whole thing a lot easier, why did he had to torture everything and everyone I loved?!_

"We don't know for sure..." Red joined the conversation, rubbing his temple slightly.

_Perhaps we had to think of something just to be on the safe side? Preparing for another attack wouldn't hurt anything would it?_

The next forty minutes consisted of all of us putting ideas into a pot of how we could be the best prepared. Gold had suggested that no-one should be alone in case Cyan would attack. If we were in pairs then the chance of that happening were slim. Everyone seemed to agree that was a good idea.

Red would stay with Green, Gold would stay with me, and we decided that Blue would accompany Crystal. We still had to call her and tell her all this. She would not be happy with the fact everyone had kept her in the dark, but she would get over it in time.

Then we had to think of an alibi for myself. If the police wanted to question me about the stabbing I had to deny any knowledge of it, and everyone assured me they would back me up somehow. Even though I was thankful for all their support a part of me wanted to own up to it.

_Maybe I would be safer in prison?_

But all my friends would be in danger, and that I could not risk so I ruled that off my list. Green assured me that the police probably wouldn't question me and when I asked why he just said he had '_contacts'_ whatever the hell that meant.

All of us talked so much that we forgot what time it was until the doctor came in and said visiting hours were over. Crystal shot me a kind smile before she left, while Green wheeled Red out, both of them bickering about Cyan. For some reason Red was still defending him a little, which I couldn't understand at all.

_Maybe he saw some reasoning behind his manic ideas?_

Then it was Gold. He didn't want to leave me, he even tried to persuade the doctor, but the authoritative man was having none of it. Instead Gold kissed me softly on the lips before muttering his goodbyes, assuring me he would be here as soon as he could.

When everyone had finally left, including the doctor the room fell very silent.

* * *

Suddenly I missed the loud voices, the laughter, the sounds of people arguing with each other. It just was too quiet and I hated it. As I lay down in my bed I sighed, looking up at the ceiling. It was getting dark outside as my room was slowly starting to become illuminated by the moonlight's soft glow. I missed Gold already.

_Why did they force him to leave? It wasn't like he kept me awake all night! Although...that thought was tempting._

I turned over onto my side, grabbing the pillows tightly.

_How could I sleep when my heart ached so much? _

Fusing my eyes closed I tried to rest my brain, attempting to remove all the thoughts of Gold that continued to swim around my mind.

_Images of his smile...hearing his laugh... and seeing those eyes..._

In annoyance I sat up in bed, fingers furiously combing through my hair.

_How the hell was I supposed to sleep?_

As a heavy sigh escaped my lips I heard a creaking noise coming from my door. My eyes diverted to the direction and noticed that it was moving, like some-one was pushing it open. I leaned forward, trying to get a better view. When the door was fully opened a small head poked around the corner curiously, a head I didn't recognise.

"Weeaaaavvvv~" It cried softly, before bounding over to my bed.

I shuffled back until my head hit the headboard and I groaned.

_Fuck I forgot that was there! _

As my eyes twitched in apprehension a black figure leapt onto my bed, large eyes gleaming in the dim light. Whatever it was knew me, but I couldn't figure out what it was.

Then I watched a clawed limb outstretch towards my face until it slowly stroked across my cheek. As my eyes sparkled with tears I realised just who this was.

_It was my partner... my best friend... she was alive!_

"S-Sneasel...?" I stuttered, watching as the figure moved into the moonlight so I could see her features. It was no longer Sneasel standing in front of me, she looked different. A red fan protruded from her nape and she was taller, her claws sharper.

_But that face...she still was my best friend._

"What... happened?!" I questioned, feeling a rogue tear escape from my eyes to dribble down my face.

"She evolved..." Came a soft voice from the door.

As I looked up I noticed it was Gold!

_How the hell did he get back in?!_

He was smiling at me, as my newly evolved Sneasel hugged me happily. I nuzzled her head softly, allowing more tears to dampen her fur.

_She was alive! She was... okay!_

"G-Gold... how the hell did you manage to-"

"I never left," He said playfully, bobbing his tongue out. "...I just hid in the toilets until the coast was clear and came back, with Weavile,"

I looked at her face. She was so grown up now, so much stronger.

_Did she do that for me?_

"Weavile..." I said her name softly, still holding her in my arms.

"Weaaavvv!" She cried happily.

Gold moved from the door to stand closer to my bed. He settled his figure on the edge, smiling wildly at both of us.

"Nurse Joy figured that if she placed a razor claw in her paws she would evolve, and she did. That fight must have powered her up."

_She wasn't dead...that was the main thing. I had no idea how they managed to fix her...but I was so glad._

"G-Gold..."I murmured weakly, feeling my bottom lip quiver as all my emotions just spilled out for him to see. I broke down into tears, so happy that she was alive, so relieved that Cyan had not murdered my best friend.

The next thing I knew was he was wrapping his arms around me, holding me close.

Weavile snuggled between us, obviously happy to be part of this scene. I clung to his jacket tightly, feeling my body shudder violently. I was overjoyed I would not have to bury my best friend. How she had survived I had no idea.

"Hey...it's okay, I'm not going anywhere." Gold soothed, gently rubbing my back.

Weavile struggled against my stomach, obviously feeling a little squashed right now. Slowly I pulled away, wrapping my arms around my ice type. I smiled softly, wishing that I would never have to go through that ever again.

She happily nuzzled my face and as I closed my eyes I never realised how much I loved her until this moment. She was the only thing that had been with me from the beginning, the only creature that had backed me up no matter what. I was eternally grateful for everything.

Gold gently wiped away the tears that lingered on my cheeks with his thumbs, causing my eyes to meet his. He smiled lovingly at me.

"It's nice to see you happy," He murmured softly, his fingers delicately brushing against my cheek. I closed my eyes briefly, leaning into his touch.

_Since when did I feel like this? I had never felt happy in my entire life, yet at this moment I did. I felt like...I wanted to smile._

I wanted to scream in joy, and it felt strange. My heart fluttered in my chest as Weavile snuggled in my arms, her eyes slowly closing. Perhaps she was tired?

Gold's hand lingered on my face as my eyes opened. He was still looking at me, drinking in this image of me being able to genuinely smile.

"I thought I had lost you... you know?" He mumbled.

Yeah, Gold must have been worried sick about me when he found out I had been hit over the head by something. I must have been kicked in the ribs too, because that pain was just unreal. Sighing softly I allowed Weavile to rest amongst the bed sheets so my arms could embrace the dark haired boy.

_Even after everything he was still here...refusing to abandon me._ _Unconditional love..._

"I'm not going anywhere..." I managed to choke out, finally relieved the tears had stopped. His lips twitched into a small smile as his fingers moved to gently tousle my hair.

"I don't want you to.."

A small part of me wanted to always be with him, like this. My mind continued to overload with images of a future, a future with him.

_ I was happy, and so was he, and we grew old together... and died together... _

I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath.

_We were only teenagers, why was I thinking of this stuff?! _

Then without thinking I pulled Gold closer to me until our lips touched softly. He inhaled deeply, fluttering his eyes shut as our mouths collided. His fingers buried themselves into my hair to pull me closer into the kiss and I did not protest.

Feeling my heart dance inside my chest I held the dark haired boy close as we kissed, our mouths colliding together like waves lapping against the shore. A hot, wet tongue desperately entered my mouth and I graciously accepted, allowing a soft groan to escape my lips.

_He tasted sweet...like sugar on my tongue, and I just didn't want it to stop._

My hands roamed his body, furiously pulling on his jacket, to moving into the satin locks of black hair to tug on them gently. Gold moaned softly as our tongues danced together, hands desperately trying to hold onto anything to deepen the kiss.

_It was desperate...needy...and I wanted it more than anything._

It was like taking a huge breath of oxygen and finally being able to breathe again.

Slowly we both pulled away from the kiss, my eyes flickering open to meet his. They were half lidded, and a soft blush tinted his honey coloured cheeks. Already I was missing the sweetness of his tongue inside my mouth. He tasted so good.

"S-Silver..."He said breathlessly, fingers still buried into my hair as our noses brushed softly against one another. "...you drive me crazy."

I sighed softly. I hoped he meant that in a positive way. As I closed my eyes for a moment I heard him speak again.

"Just you wait till you come home..."

Instantly I opened them to look into his own golden orbs,

"Why? What are you planning?"

He smiled softly at me and rubbed his nose against mine before pulling away.

"...I just want to show you how much I love you..."

At that moment I felt my heart do somersaults in my chest. Of course I knew exactly what he meant, but the way he said it was tender and loving. Like he didn't just want to have sex with me any more, like he wanted something more, a proper physical commitment.

Then the sounds of footsteps down the hall alerted the dark haired boy.

He turned around, eyes concentrating to see if anyone was coming inside. If Gold was found in here with me then the doctor's were sure to throw him out. I didn't want that. He turned back to me, listening to the footsteps get closer.

"I have to go," He whispered, gently kissing my lips once more.

I understood, I didn't want him getting into trouble because of me. Gently he scooped Weavile into his arms and got up from the bed. My eyes followed his figure, outlined in the moonlight as he approached the door. He peered out of the glass to ensure the coast was clear before he turned to look at me.

"I'll be back soon,"

"I know..." I mumbled weakly, clutching the bed sheets tightly around my body.

As he flashed me a brilliant smile I watched the dark haired boy slowly open the door, take another sneak peek, and then with a wave of his hand left my room.

* * *

Sighing heavily I lay back into the soft pillow, watching as the moonlight illuminated the bottom half of my bed.

_Why did he have to go? I could have hid him in this room somehow... _

Placing a hand to my head I decided that thinking about it was not doing me any favours, so instead I turned over onto my side. Closing my eyes I tried to rest my mind, to forget about everything just so I could get a decent night's sleep. Soon I would be able to go home, and Gold had offered to live at my apartment until I felt better.

_That was nice of him. I had never lived with him before, I wondered if we could work it out?_

_ Damn... I was thinking of him again._

As I pulled the white bed sheets further over my shoulder's and settled down to try and sleep I heard the footsteps once again. This time they sounded louder, like they were literally just outside my door. My eyes opened slightly as I continued to listen to the footsteps, edging closer, until they stopped.

_Did they decide to leave or something?_

Then I heard my door opening slightly, creaking under the pressure.

I figured it was the doctor coming to check on me so I closed my eyes and sighed softly. Pretending to be asleep should work for now, maybe Gold was still lingering in the toilets or something? Whoever it was stopped at the foot of my bed, and the only sound I could hear was breathing.

_Wouldn't the doctor have said something by now? _

I still refused to open my eyes, pretending to be asleep. The doctor would just have to come back and check on me in the morning. Then hopefully Gold would come back for a while.

Only I discovered that it wasn't the doctor who was in the room with me.

"Hello...Silver,"

My eyes shot open and I sat up in bed, feeling my heart pulsate faster inside my chest.

_No...it couldn't be!_

The tall figure stood at the foot of my bed, arms folded. Moonlight shone onto half of his face, the part that allowed me to figure out just who this was.

"Cyan...?" I struggled to say, watching as he sat on the edge of my bed, emotionless eyes glaring right into me.

_But...wasn't he supposed to be dead?_

He smiled, a heart breaking smile that made me want to kill myself there and then.

_Was he here to finish me off?_

"Aren't you pleased to see I am alive Silver? I am very happy you are alive, I would not be happy if you...died so easily on me,"

His voice was cold, causing all the hairs on my arms to stand on end.

_He was glad I was alive? Yeah, and I knew why. His intentions were not to kill me. He just wanted to make sure I suffered, and he was doing a wonderful job at that._

"How the hell did you get in?!"

He smirked at my question.

"Security isn't very tight around this place, I just walked right in."

_This couldn't be right, Cyan was meant to be dead!_

"But...they found a body at the scene! How is it possible you are alive?!" I cried out, wanting to fool myself into believing this was nothing more than a nightmare, and that Cyan was not sitting on my hospital bed making small talk with me. He started to laugh, only it seemed more like a witches cackle.

"Come now Silver, did you really think you could kill me by using a tiny shard of glass? You made the mistake of leaving it embedded in me, if you had removed it then perhaps I would have been more seriously injured..."

My eyes widened.

_Shit! He was right! The glass shard stopped most of the bleeding! If I had removed it... he would have bled to death. _

Cold black eyes stared at me the entire time.

"...and Zorua is the Master of Illusion. You do the maths to figure out why there was a body,"

_So he used the Zorua to make a copy of him so he could get away? No wonder Violet said there was a body at the scene. I should have known that it wouldn't be so simple to kill this vermin._

Then Cyan neared me, his face becoming dangerously close to my own. I swallowed hard, praying that he wouldn't try to kiss me again. I didn't want to feel helpless or dirty any more. Cold fingers grabbed my wrist tightly, causing me to hiss in pain.

"You haven't been punished enough for killing my brother..."

_So what was he going to do to me now? I'm sure he thought Sneasel was dead, yet he still wanted more?!_

I glared at the dark haired boy, clenching my hand into a fist.

"There is nothing you can do to me that will make me suffer any more," I stated bravely, smirking.

Maybe I could bluff my way through this? His eyes twitched in annoyance, until his other hand grabbed my free hand, pushing my body down onto the bed. I chewed my lip, trying to stay strong.

_Cyan was not my father...he would never do that to me..._

"Oh really? Well how would you feel if I killed your precious Gold huh? Are you telling me it wouldn't make you suffer?!"

His voice was harsh in my ears, as the grip on my wrists intensified. As my heart started to thunder inside my chest I tried to ignore his taunts. He had plenty of opportunities to kill Gold, yet every time he hadn't touched him. I doubted that would change now.

"Just admit it Cyan, it's all over."

Of course it would never be over for him. The only time it would be over was when he was no longer around. And there was only one way to be sure of that. As his grip on my wrists remained firm he smiled, mocking me, taunting me.

"But of course. All this is nothing more than collateral damage for you, isn't it? My brother's death wasn't something you thought would happen. But when it did...you finally realised what a shit you are!"

I took a deep breath to steady my nerves. Maybe if Cyan had come here to finish me off then I might not have been so nervous. Because I didn't know his intentions it was causing my mind to go into overdrive.

"Well maybe you should have taught him how to fight in a Pokemon battle! He used a fucking Rattatta! Did you really think he would beat anyone with that?!"

Suddenly his hand released my wrist only to smack my face hard. It stung as I closed my eyes, feeling the burning sensation it left behind. Then his grip was on my chin, forcing me to look at him. Cold eyes glared into me.

"Don't you fucking bad mouth my baby brother!"

I swallowed hard, trying to ignore the stinging pain on my face, and the harsh grip on my chin. Deep within I just prayed.

_Please don't kiss me again... please..._

The weight of Cyan's body prevented me from struggling and I found it almost impossible to look away.

"I'm in the right mind to fucking tear you a new ass hole, you bastard." He spat at me, causing my eyes to close in apprehension.

_Was he talking about...raping me? Fuck no, I wasn't going to let that happen! Not again...and not by him! _

Angrily I thrashed against Cyan, managing to push him off me, and watched as he fell off my bed, hitting against the floor. He groaned at the contact, but didn't move. I sat further upright, bringing my knees to my chest for some kind of protection.

"There is no fucking way you are going to do that to me!"

I watched as Cyan got up from the floor, holding the side of his head in annoyance. Dark eyes glared at me, and if looks could kill then I would have died a thousand times over.

"Like you could stop me." He cooed, smirking.

My eyes twitched as he just stood there, nursing his head from the fall. There was no way in hell Cyan was going to do that to me. I would kill him before he even tried.

"Wanna bet?"

I kept up this façade, pretending that Cyan hadn't just gotten underneath my skin. And I hoped it was working. Then he groaned, obviously from the effects of the fall. A part of me prayed that a doctor would come in about now and drag this creep out of here.

"I doubt I could stop myself..." He mused, laughing after his words.

It sent a horrible cold shiver down my spine as images started to haunt my mind.

_Just like that dream I had...when it was no longer Gold fucking me...but him! That would never happen._

"And why is that?" I taunted, keeping my knees close to my chest.

Cyan smirked and then looked away, his eyes focusing on a picture that hung on the wall.

"Because it is so wonderful to see you so helpless...so vulnerable. Tell me Silver, did you enjoy it when your daddy fucked you?"

I felt my heart sink into a sea of despair as the venom dripped from his words, and his devilish laugh hung in the air.

_He knew...but how?! How did he know of that?! Why would he even say that to me? _

I chewed the inside of my lip, trying to stay calm, trying not to break down.

"I'm sure you would have loved it if your father sexually abused you, huh? Or even... your brother."

Cyan's cold emotionless eyes caught fire as he glared at me. Suddenly he slammed his hands on my bed in rage.

"Don't you fucking talk about him like that!"

"Hit a nerve, have we?" I mocked him, when deep inside I was crumbling down.

He didn't need to know that, he needed to believe I was strong and that I could deal with this shit. I watched as his hands clenched into fists, his head bowed downwards so his hair was flopping over his face.

"You have no fucking idea how it feels to lose something that you love more than anything in the world...but you will, soon. You will realise just how agonising it feels to be alone in this world, to have nothing positive any more. I will take that away from you!"

I watched as his body straightened, and he moved away from my bed. Cyan walked to the window, gazing out at the large moon that hung lazily in the night sky.

"I will cherish that day...when I finally destroy the one precious thing you have in your life. When I finally destroy Gold..right in front of your eyes!"

_Was he bluffing again? Was he trying to get a reaction out of me?_

I took a deep breath, my eyes focused on the back of his head. If he wanted to destroy Gold why was he biding his time?

"If you wanted to do that from the beginning why wait this long?" I questioned, feeling my voice tremble as the last word came out.

Cyan chuckled darkly, until emotionless eyes connected with mine for a moment. All I saw was pure evil, completely dominated by the darkness within his soul.

"I had to wait until you fell uncontrollably in love with him. Now, I know that if anything were to happen to him... it would destroy you. And that is exactly what I want!"

And now it made sense. He needed substantial proof that I was in love with Gold before he decided to put his plan into action. And now he had that proof the game was in his hands, and it was his turn to move.

"But anyway, I have stayed far too long..."

My eyes focused on Cyan as he walked towards the door, eyes not even bothering to meet my own. I swallowed hard, wondering if I should say or do something.

_But what? Was he going after Gold now?_

"If you harm Gold in any way... I'll kill you myself." I warned in a steady voice, watching as he paused by the door.

A cold smirk scarred his lips as he faced me for the final time.

"Don't make promises you can't keep Silver, we both know you could never do that."

"Really? Want to test your theory?" I threatened, moving my knees to sit upright.

Slowly I curled my hands into fists at my side, waiting for him to do something. But he didn't. He just laughed at me.

"It's quite amusing hearing your attempts at threatening me, and as much as I would love to stay and chat I have business to attend to. Enjoy the rest of your hospital stay."

Before I even had a chance to say anything he was out of my room, leaving me to bathe in the afterglow of what just happened. So Cyan was now well and truly after Gold, and while he was not with me he was vulnerable.

I needed to get out of this hospital soon, and by soon I meant in the morning.

* * *

**Author's Note: Oh no! Poor Gold! He is in trouble for real this time! What will happen next?! Please read and review :3 it makes a girl very happy face :D and see you all in the next chapter!**


	20. Blindfolds and Ribbon

**Author's Note: Hello all! Ah, this chapter might please alot of you fans out there! Stay tuned and find out what I have planned!**

* * *

**Chapter Twenty: Blindfolds and Ribbon**

I hardly slept a wink last night. Cyan's night time visit had really put me on edge for the rest of the night. All I kept thinking about was Gold and praying he was okay.

If Cyan hurt him I would murder him, that was a fact. But even though I was terribly sleep deprived and probably looked worse for wear the Doctor assured me that I could go home today, provided some-one would be there to look after me.

_What the hell was this? I wasn't a child, I didn't need babysitting!_

I felt a lot better when I saw Gold visit me in the morning, smiling that idiotic smile as usual. He must have known I could come home today, and that was obviously something to be happy about. But I had to do something about Cyan. I had to get all the gang together and discuss measures we could put in place to stop him attacking any one of us. It was for the best.

Once I had gotten dressed into my usual clothes and was actually sitting up on my bed Gold had decided to sit beside me. Large golden eyes scanned me all over, ensuring I was fit enough to come home.

"You feeling okay?" He asked.

I nodded, needing to get out of here as soon as possible. Cyan was on the loose and I needed to stop him.

"Yes, I just need to go home."

Gold frowned in response.

"You have to think about yourself sometimes you know, if you still feel ill then I can ask the Doctor if you can stay a bit longer here."

I shook my head defiantly. There was no way I was going to spend another day cooped up in here while that maniac was on the streets.

"No, I am fine. I just want to go home."

Gold nodded and just leaned against my shoulder. He sighed softly as we just stayed like this for a while.

"Green is convinced that Cyan is still around..." He mused quietly.

"He is..." I murmured, my eyes meeting the floor in disgust. "He is back...and he is coming after you..."

Gold immediately sat up and looked at me with wide eyes. _Did he not believe me?_

"W-what? But...Violet saw a body..."

"He visited me last night after you left." I told him, hating the reoccurring images that flooded my mind. He was after blood, and it was Gold's blood he wanted. An eye for an eye and all that.

"Did he do anything to you?!" He exclaimed, golden eyes looking me over carefully. I shook my head weakly.

"No...but I reckon he would have if I hadn't pushed him away from me. But he told me he is after you, so you need to stay with me."

I hated seeing that look his eyes, the vulnerable look. I had seen it way too often. While I was around I would make sure he was safe, there was no way Cyan would get to him.

"Why is he after me? I haven't done anything to him!" Gold exclaimed, running a hand through his hair in apprehension.

I sighed softly, not wanting to explain that it was all my fault. If I had been nicer to his little brother then none of this would have happened. Right now I wished I could take it all back and start again.

"It's to make sure I suffer. His little brother died because of something I said...and now he wants revenge." I admitted, tugging aimlessly at the hem of my t-shirt. Gold's hand gently held my arm, causing me to look at him.

"We need to tell the police about this, they might be able to stop him."

"And if we tell the police who's to say he won't kill you anyway?" I interjected, sighing softly.

_What the hell was I supposed to do? Yes, Gold was coming to live with me, but I couldn't stay with him 24/7_.

His eyes diverted to the floor in sadness.

"Well...maybe we should call everyone together and tell them about it? If everyone knows about Cyan then we might be able to prepare for it."

That was the idea anyway. Having everyone there would help matters anyway. No-one needed to be alone during this time. Any one of us were vulnerable.

"Yes, well we haven't got much time. So let's get out of here!"

* * *

It took two hours to get back to Goldenrod, and considering I was still a little wobbly on my legs that was why it took so long. But Gold remained patient with me, which was nice of him.

I decided that once we got to my apartment I would call everyone and ask them to come round. We needed to discuss our plan of action, and make sure no-one was vulnerable.

Cyan was unpredictable, especially now his little brother had killed himself. We had to stay cautious, and think of every possible scenario to avoid conflict. Gold glanced across at me as we walked through Goldenrod city, towards my apartment.

"Are you sure you're okay?" He asked softly, one of his arms wrapped around my waist to keep my whole body stable.

I nodded, grunting to myself. The pain in my ribs returned, only it seemed more of a dull ache than anything else. I could handle that.

"Yeah, we need to call everyone and get them to my apartment."

"Silver...just concentrate on getting better first. That can wait."

I wanted to really chew his ear off about that.

_How could he say that?! I didn't give two shits about my health right now! _

But instead of arguing I just sighed and allowed Gold to aid me.

"Don't you ever wonder what your life might have been like if you never met Cyan's brother?" Gold asked, creating small talk to pass the time.

I shrugged, even though I had. Over thinking about the what if's and the should have's never helped my mind, in fact it only made me feel even worse about the whole thing.

"All the time, I wonder that if I had just shut up then none of this would have happened."

Gold smiled softly.

"Yes, that is true. But...we might not have ever got together."

That was a valid point. It was down to me walking in the Pokemon Centre to heal Sneasel that caused me to bump into Gold. It was by chance, a twist of fate. If I never battled Cyan's brother then that part of my life would be erased forever.

I frowned to myself.

"Hey, cheer up! If it was meant to be then it would have happened regardless!" Gold's cheery voice pulled me from the depths of despair, and once again he was right. But I didn't believe in all that bullshit.

_Fate, I already knew what mine was. That was all I needed to know._

* * *

Once Gold and I got into my apartment we didn't have any time to waste lounging around, chatting. No, instead I asked him to call everyone and tell them about Cyan's visit. We needed to discuss what to do next.

As expected Green blew a fuse, screaming about destroying Cyan himself, which was actually rather comical. Red was as nonchalant as ever, not believing that Cyan would try to hurt anyone again.

_Did he even know this lunatic? He attacked him, and Red was still defending him? _

Crystal was definitely on board with our plans, and said she would be over as soon as possible, now it just left Blue.

Somehow I had to call her and explain everything without her freaking out on me. I knew it was a difficult task but some-one had to do it. It was better that I told her, than hearing it from Green, or Red.

So as the phone rang and I placed the receiver to my ear I took a deep breath.

_Just what the hell was I supposed to say?_

But I didn't have long to decide my words before the brunette picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey Blue, it's me."

I heard her literally scream in joy which caused me to wince. _That girl sometimes..._

"Oh my God Silver! I am so pleased to hear from you! How are things? Are you and Gold okay and on track now?"

_God, so many questions...but that was how Blue rolled._

I smiled weakly, watching Gold walk around the living room aimlessly.

"I am good Blue, thanks. And yes, Gold and I are fine."

"Oh, that is great news! Oh, and you left your blindfold here!" I cringed, placing a hand to my head.

_Shit...why did she have to bring that up? I was just about to tell her about psycho Cyan and she goes and says that. Typical._

"Blue..there is something I have to tell you..." I tried, once again hearing her high pitched voice cut into my sentence.

"Imagine the fun you could have with that! I mean..I'm not saying you don't have fun already Silver, but man...how kinky would your sex life be? Especially since you guys are like totally made for each other. Oh! Isn't it Gold's birthday soon? You totally have to make it special because you-"

"BLUE!" I screamed down the phone, hearing her shut up almost immediately.

I sighed softly, hating the fact I had to shout to get my voice heard but sometimes it was a necessary evil.

"...can you just shut up for a minute?"

There was a pause, and a part of me hoped that I hadn't hurt her feelings by shouting. Even Gold seemed alarmed but once I waved him off he continued rummaging through my stuff.

"Look..we have a major problem going on here, and I needed to tell you about it."

"Major problem?" She repeated, her voice sounding worried. I nodded weakly.

"Yes. Cyan is back, and is out to destroy everything I care about. That includes you and Gold."

I heard her gasp on the phone and it sent a violent shiver dancing down my spine. I didn't want that psycho hurting Blue. She was like a big sister to me.

"Oh my God.."

"So, that is why you need to come over to Johto as soon as you can. Green, Red, Crystal, Gold and myself are discussing measures to ensure everyone stays safe."

Now I said it out loud it sounded so serious. We all had no idea where Cyan was, or who he would target next.

_Yes, he told me he was after Gold but he could have used that as a decoy so he could target Green or Crystal. We had to be one step ahead of his game._

"Wow...this shit is serious!"

"It really is Blue, and it's all my fault.."I sighed heavily, closing my eyes for a moment. My heart felt heavy, like a horrible weight was pressing down on it.

"Don't talk like that! None of this is your fault!"

I cracked a weak smile, loving Blue's optimism.

"Anyway... can you get over here soon?" I asked, hearing her pause. Maybe she was thinking about something.

"I'll see what I can do, I should be able to get the Magnet train to Goldenrod City. I should be there in about...two hours?"

That was better than nothing, and if Blue and Crystal teamed up together then at least they would be safe. Both girls' had feisty personalities so I doubted the likelihood of Cyan targeting them.

"Thanks Blue, I owe you one."

She giggled softly, but it was a nervous giggle.

"I'll be there as soon as I can."

I smiled, thankful that she was complying with my request so easily. Sometimes she would ask too many questions, or blatantly say no.

_Maybe she figured it was serious this time?_

"Oh, and Silver?"

"Yeah?"

She giggled once again.

"Do you want me to bring the blindfold?"

I sighed. Way to kill the conversation. I would like to say that right now the last thing on my mind was sex, but it wasn't.

_After all, being cooped up in a hospital bed for two weeks? Yeah...not good._

"If you want."

I could practically hear her squeal in delight on the other end of the phone.

"Alright, see you soon!"

As the conversation ended and I put the phone down I was greeted by Gold's confused expression. One of his eyebrows were raised at me, as a playful smirk teased his lips.

"Did I hear that right?" He mused.

I sat forward, clasping my hands together.

"Hear what?"

The smirk turned into a grin as he moved from the wall to walk towards me.

"Did Blue mention a blindfold?"

At that moment in time I felt my face flush up. My cheeks burned and I swear I must have looked like a tomato right now.

_How did he over hear that?!_

"Well...sort of." I tried, moving the conversation along. Gold sat beside me, amber eyes staring right at me. His expression was playful.

"Was that for her benefit, or yours?"

I really wanted to hit Gold right now, he knew how embarrassed I got when faced with situations like this.

_Stupid Blue and her stupid ideas!_

I placed a hand to my head, trying to ignore the fact that Gold was smiling at me.

"Does it matter?"

"I'd say it does! I mean I think I deserve to know if you're going all S&M on my ass." He laughed, and I swear he was oblivious to the pun he just threw out there, but I didn't say anything. Then I felt his hand on my arm, squeezing gently.

"Why on Earth would I be into bondage?!" I cried out, feeling my face get hotter the more my mind thought about it.

_Why the fuck was I thinking of this?! I didn't want to think of Gold tying me up...blindfolding me..._

"You tell me Silver. Why would Blue mention it?"

I bit my lip harshly as I put my head in my hands, refusing to look at him. My face was already red, he didn't need to see me blushing.

"She is an idiot!"

"And obviously terribly perverted..." Gold chuckled, his hand remaining firm on the crook of my arm. That was so true. It was Blue's twisted idea to even buy a blindfold, and oh shit!

_I asked her to bring it over...and she would willingly show it in front of everyone. What had I done? Okay, I had to get out of here!_

I stood up quickly, knocking Gold's hand off my arm and made my way towards the kitchen.

_Maybe some water might help me cool off a little? _

I prayed to God that Gold hadn't followed me, and by the time I got to the sink to splash my face I didn't hear his footsteps. That was a relief!. I gripped the sink for dear life as I struggled to remove those incriminating images from my mind.

Dirty images that usually I wouldn't even dream of, yet ever since Gold and I had become closer in a physical way I discovered that perhaps it wouldn't be so bad.

_Would it be different if Gold tied me down while we had sex? Would it be hot, and rough? Or would he still be slow and sensual? Shit... _

I tried to push my erection down that was causing a small tent in my jeans.

_Why the fuck was I getting aroused over this? Oh yeah...two weeks without sex...damn! _

The water on my face had literally no effect and I still could feel my cheeks burn like crazy.

_What if Gold hated the thought of doing that? Or what if he wanted me to do those things to him?_

"Silver?"

I jolted upright immediately, once again trying to conceal the tent in my jeans from view. Looking over my shoulder nervously I replied;

"Y-yeah?"

"You seem a little flustered..."

Gold was now standing behind me, not close enough to notice my red cheeks but close enough for my mind to go into overdrive once again. _Fucking hell!_

"No...I'm fine." I lied, turning my face back to the sink, praying to God that my erection would go down. I heard him chuckle softly.

"Well I'm not fine at all."

Blinking rapidly I turned to face him once again. He was pouting, one of his arms placed against the wall as his golden eyes scanned the room.

"Why, is something wrong?"

He shook his head, smiling ever so slightly.

"Silver...do you know it's been two weeks?"

_Shit...so he knew too? So it wasn't just me then_.

Awkwardly I turned to face him fully, moving my leg slightly to conceal my excitement. As much as the thought of Gold pouncing on me was appealing as fuck I didn't want to screw on the kitchen counters.

"I know..." I mumbled, feeling my face flush again. He approached me until he was a few inches away from my face. That smile lingered on his lips as one of his hands reached out to touch my hair softly.

"And.. considering you have called a meeting with every Tom, Dick and Harry...we don't have much time..."

_Much time? For what exactly?_

I felt my legs hit the back of the sink as he got closer to me, his lips just ever so slightly brushing against my own. I closed my eyes, feeling my whole body tremble.

_Oh my God...it was going to be the kitchen wasn't it? _

"G-Gold..." I murmured weakly, burying my fingers into his t-shirt to pull him closer. Our lips brushed softly against each other which was torture for me.

_I just wanted him to kiss me... _

Without thinking I pushed my tongue against his mouth, hoping he would give in to me finally. And he did. His hands buried themselves in my hair as our tongues collided fiercely in the battle for dominance, whilst I pulled at his t-shirt desperately.

_God...I needed this so badly._

Moaning softly into the kiss my legs moved away from the sink and backed into a counter. Gold's body was pressed flush against my own as we kissed like our lives depended on it.

_It was hot...desperate...and exactly what I wanted._

Whilst lost in this intoxicating kiss I pushed whatever was on the counter off, hearing objects hit the floor. I didn't care. I wanted him...so badly.

Gold's hands moved down from my hair to my waist and then hoisted my lower half on top of the counter, whilst our mouths continued to collide furiously. His tongue was hot and wet in my mouth, giving me a sugar rush like no other.

My heart thundered in my chest as my hands moved underneath Gold's t-shirt to claw softly at his back. He groaned into the kiss, pushing his body closer to mine until he was literally grinding into me on top of the counter.

"Aah..." I cried, breaking the kiss for air. Gold panted as half lidded eyes drunk in this image of me, flustered on top of my kitchen counter, legs apart.

He smirked playfully before working his magic on my jeans to get them open. My fingers continued to claw down his back, feeling his body arch into me every time, until they wondered to the waistband of his shorts.

As my hands pushed underneath the material to feel the smoothness of his bare ass against my hands he moaned softly, lips attaching themselves to my neck hungrily.

My eyes shot open as he suckled the skin harshly, intending to cause a mark on my pale white skin.

"G-Gold!" I yelped like a newborn puppy under his control, legs writhing uncontrollably underneath him. My jeans were now loose around my legs so I figured he had managed to unbutton them.

His own nimble fingers danced over my body, pushing my t-shirt further up my torso to gain more access to my skin and I didn't protest. He was burning up against me, his tongue against my neck felt like he was setting it on fire.

_God...it felt so good._

Slowly I pulled Gold's shorts down, hearing him breathe heavily every time his body moved against my own. Well... if my erection was anything to go by then he must have been aroused too.

His mouth moved from my neck up to my ear, which caused me to shudder violently.

"Do you want me to tie you down Silver?" He cooed softly, creating an eruption of Goosebumps to cover my skin.

_Tie me down? He wanted to...do that? _

His lips ever so softly kissed my ear, until that hot, needy tongue started to assault it.

"Aaaah! Gold! Shit!" I cried out, hating the fact that was where I was the most sensitive.

"Do you?" He murmured once again, his breath warm on my skin.

_What would happen if I said yes? Man... it was so tempting_.

I closed my eyes, feeling his fingers touch every inch of bare skin he could access, and hearing that sultry tone in his voice. It was driving me crazy.

"Aaah...yeah..." I mumbled, biting my lip softly.

Then just like that Gold moved, allowing my hands to fall by my sides.

_What was he planning?_

I just watched in awe as he took off his t-shirt without a murmur, throwing it casually on the kitchen tiles, whilst he kicked off his shorts.

_Here he was...half naked, about to tie me up? Holy hell! _

He opened a drawer directly underneath me until he pulled out some sort of red ribbon. I never even knew I had that in there.

"Give me your hands." He commanded, but his voice was soft.

Taking a deep breath, and trying to fight this uncontrollable lust that was swimming through me I held my arms out in front of me. Gold started tying them together, allowing the beautiful red satin to contrast against my ice white skin.

_Oh my God...he was doing this wasn't he?_

Once he tied the bow he smirked playfully, allowing the realisation to hit me in the face.

"Now...put them behind your head..."

As I did as instructed Gold climbed on top of me once again, his own nimble fingers working at removing my jeans completely. My t-shirt had been pushed up my body and was left to hang around my neck and shoulder's. Not that I minded, I was far too turned on to care.

I felt my jeans become discarded along with the rest of the clothing and then Gold's lips connected with mine once again. The palms of his hands rested softly against my face as we kissed delicately. My eyes closed, giving into the sweet intoxication once again.

Then the softness of the kiss turned desperate once again. Our tongues danced angrily with each other as Gold's hands wondered down my body until he found my hips.

In haste he pulled my body closer to his so that our erections, which were concealed by our boxers, could brush against one another. The feelings that erupted through my body were so intense I just wanted to scream.

_But...I couldn't even touch Gold...He was in control, and a part of me hated it. _

"G-Gold..." I groaned softly as we broke the kiss.

_I wanted to be the one to pull his boxers down..teasingly...but instead I just had to watch him do it_.

I could hear him moaning occasionally, accompanied by bouts of heavy breathing.

_God...he was driving me up the wall!_

"I want you..." He cooed in my ear, as his fingertips moved to slowly pulled my boxers down my legs, leaving me utterly exposed on my kitchen counter top. Not that I cared right now.

_It had been two weeks...and damn I was horny._

Keeping my eyes closed I just wanted to feel this moment, to taste him on my tongue, to hear those delicious moans explode in the air surrounding us. This moment was perfect.

Once again our naked erections brushed together, causing my whole body to shudder in pleasure. Why was he torturing me like this?

As I struggled against the ribbon, that was tied around my wrists I felt his hands move down my stomach, just ghosting over my sensitive organ.

"G-Gold..please..." I mewled, panting heavily as time after time he teased me, not daring to touch me completely. Was he trying to drive me insane here?

"Please what?"

His voice was seductive in my ear and it caused my body to writhe uncontrollably. My heart hammered against my ribcage as excitement tingled all my senses.

"...touch me..."

At that moment my voice sounded so desperate, but I didn't care. My eyes opened weakly only to close once again as his fingers started to stroke my erection properly, taking extra time to dance across the tip, which nearly made me scream.

"G-Gold!" I cried, feeling my whole body writhe uncontrollably underneath him.

He was so good at this. Every stroke was smooth, and slow until I protested and then he would speed up dramatically. My hair was laced with sweat and was sticking to my forehead as I panted for air.

_Oh my God...he would be the death of me._

"Oh God..." I cried, my whole body shuddering violently.

Gold emitted a feral growl deep in his throat as he moved his hand faster around my sensitive organ.

_I wanted to touch him...so badly...but I couldn't_.

My wrists hurt from the struggling against the ribbon as time after time I was being pushed closer to the edge by his ministrations.

"I love it when you moan like that..." He murmured softly against my ear.

A_nd I loved it when he was doing this to me... _

As his hand quickened the pace I felt my stomach muscles contract painfully as my release was building up. I couldn't hold on for much longer...

"Shit...I...aaah...so...close..." I groaned, forgetting all the gibberish nonsense that flowed out of my mouth. Nothing made sense any more, all coherent thinking went straight out the window. Gold quickened the pace while his other hand lingered on my face, gently caressed the skin beneath his fingertips.

_I couldn't hold it...I couldn't..._

"Oh God...ahaa...Gold!" I mewled loudly, as my orgasm reached it's peak and I released all over Gold's hand and my own stomach.

My ears were ringing and I dared not open my eyes. I doubted I would even be able to see straight anyway. Panting heavily I felt my heart thundering against my ribcage, feeling like it would burst out of my chest at any minute.

"Some-one is horny, aren't they?" He teased playfully.

Weakly I opened my eyes, giving me enough time to watch him quickly wash his hand underneath the tap, and wipe it on a towel that was nearby. My stomach was still sticky, but I could wash that off later.

Gold was still horny, as his erection was still standing to attention and I wondered would we actually end up screwing on the kitchen counter?

His other hand gently traced up my bare leg, sending a shiver down my spine.

"Silver..."

His lips were hot on my neck once again, as he placed delicate butterfly kisses all along my collarbone. I closed my eyes, as his body melded against mine. His skin was hot against my own, and I was starting to perspire more.

Then his hand moved, fingers ghosting over my ass until he ever so slowly pushed a digit inside me. I jolted suddenly, biting my lip but I figured the discomfort wouldn't last for long.

As my skin started to burn up through Gold's hot kisses I discovered that I would seriously need a shower after this. His finger thrust mercilessly inside me, wiggling it occasionally just to make me squirm.

_God...why was he teasing me?_

Gold grunted softly, as his tongue assaulted my earlobe once again, and my hands pulled against the ribbon. I wanted to touch him!

"I want you Silver...so badly.." He cooed, causing a soft moan to escape my lips, every time he thrust his finger deeper inside me. My muscles were starting to relax and a subtle burst of pleasure started to ripple through my body.

His breaths were hot on my skin, sending beautiful sparks throughout my nerve endings.

"I want...to be inside you..." He pushed deeper inside, causing me to gasp and pull against the ribbon.

_I wanted that too...I wanted to feel us become one again, to always be together._

He added a second finger, pushing just as deep as the first. My body arched into his touch, as sultry moans danced off my tongue.

"G-Gold..."I whispered, feeling my heart pulsate ever faster in my chest, only it wasn't just out of lust. It was out of love too, the intense energy rushing inside of me. It electrified my skin, and ignited the fire deep inside of me that I never knew existed until now.

Gold gently nipped at my earlobe as he continued wriggling his fingers inside me, feeling the muscle relax around the digits. I was so calm right now, and still so horny. I didn't care about screwing on the kitchen counter top any more.

_I just...needed it._

"I want to...feel every inch of you..."Gold cooed softly, as he removed his fingers gently.

I kept my eyes closed, just wanting to enjoy this moment a little longer. When Gold and I had sex it really did feel we were not just two people any more, we were whole just for that precious moment. I wasn't sure how many more of these moments we had left.

My body jolted at the sudden cold and wet substance that was pressing against my entrance. I figured Gold had used something to act as lube for this act. I hissed at the contact, until I felt a warm palm on my cheek.

My eyes opened slightly, seeing Gold smile at me genuinely. His cheeks were flushed and he was panting for air, and that just made me want him even more.

I wrestled against the ribbon around my wrists as I felt his erection push inside me, slowly.

_Okay...I just needed to take deep breaths, and wait for the discomfort to subside. This always happened._

Once all of Gold's length was inside me he waited, one hand placing itself on my hip while the other gently stroked my face. After a few moments I could feel my muscles relax around him, and figured it was okay for him to move now.

"Okay..."I murmured weakly.

Gold nodded, putting both of his hands on my hips to guide me in time with his thrusts. They were slow to begin with, gently pulling out only to slide back in. As he worked up a rhythm I could feel my organ start to become erect once again.

_ God...I had missed this..._

"G-Gold...don't stop..."I moaned softly, feeling my body sliding against the marbled surface as he thrust into me.

His breaths were heavy and laced with moans that sent electric impulses all along my skin. His fingers gripped my hips roughly as he plunged deeper inside me, sending my body into an uncontrollable spasm.

"Silver...I...aaahhh..."

I fused my eyes shut, feeling wave after wave of pleasure sear through me like a bullet. My skin was completely covered in sweat, causing my hair to congeal around my face and on my forehead. But I didn't care.

My legs tightened around Gold as he thrust harder into me, pulling him as close as I possibly could.

"Yes...yes..." I moaned softly, feeling my eyes become half lidded with lust as he continued to thrust inside me. Gold's body shuddered and I figured he was close to releasing.

But the next noise I heard wasn't Gold.

I vaguely remember hearing the sound of a door being opened, whilst lost in the throws of passion. But I thought nothing more of it and continued to get completely dominated by the dark haired boy.

"...harder..." I mewled, pulling him in deeper with my legs.

Gold groaned in response as he thrust deeper inside me, finding that one spot which I loved, and sent my eyes rolling to the back of my head.

"Oh God...yes..."

As all reasoning went right out the window and the only thing that should have registered was Gold and I, and this moment, it was destroyed immediately.

"OH MY GOD!"

Gold immediately paused, causing me to groan in annoyance. As I opened my eyes I noticed that Crystal had come in, without knocking might I add!

_And now she had seen everything! Shit... _

I watched as the blue haired girl covered her eyes dramatically, and moved away.

"SHIT SHIT! I AM SO SORRY!" She wailed, hurrying out of the room instantly.

Gold's eyes met mine for a moment as we both blushed a terrible shade of crimson.

_As if Crystal had caught us..having sex on the kitchen counter... _

Quickly Gold untied my hands, allowing me to brush the strands of hair out of my eyes. _Oh dear..._

"Fuck my life!" I cried out, putting my hands over my face in embarrassment.

"Well...that kinda ruined the moment..."Gold joked, quickly removing his now limp organ from my entrance and started to quickly dress himself.

As my heart continued to thunder in my chest I pulled my t-shirt down, trying to get rid of the creases. Man...that would be a bitch to get out. Gold handed me my boxers and jeans, and I got dressed in record time.

_Not that I wanted to..._

As I got up off the counter I sighed, adjusting my clothes accordingly.

_How the hell was I supposed to explain this to her? Sorry Crystal, you have really bad timing because you know I kinda wanted Gold to screw me some more? Doubtful._

"I think we should explain to her..." Gold tried, running his fingers through his hair, as he continued to breathe heavily. I nodded weakly, hating the fact we were disturbed when we were both so close to releasing.

_This was so shit!_

* * *

Gold and I walked, uneasily I might add into the living room, where Crystal sat, hunched up like she was crying. Well the sight couldn't have been too pleasant for the poor girl. I looked at Gold and we exchanged shrugs.

_Who the hell would try to explain all this? _

"Crystal..."Gold said quietly, causing the blue haired girl to leap up in shock. Her face was bright red and she was on edge.

_Then again...I think anyone would be like that after seeing what she saw._

"Gold, shit I am so sorry! You left the door unlocked so I just came in...SHIT! I should have knocked!"

She put her head in her hands as Gold and I sat down on the sofa.

_Well yes, she should have, but it was too late for that now._

He smiled painfully. He must have been annoyed deep down inside because he was so close to releasing and she came and ruined the moment.

"I'm sorry that you are scarred for life." He chuckled.

Crystal shook her head.

"I am such a fucking idiot! Oh man..."

I placed a hand to my head and sighed. I know I organised a group meeting but I didn't think Crystal would get here for hours!

_Maybe we should have had sex first, and then organised it? _

"No Crystal...we are just sorry you saw all that." Gold smiled awkwardly at Crystal, and then back at me.

_Some-one remind me to lock the door in future._

I folded my arms in annoyance as Gold tried to ease Crystal's overexert mind, but I had a feeling it might take a while. After all...that image was probably burnt into her retinas for eternity.

Half an hour passed, and eventually Crystal had calmed down significantly. She was no longer a quivering wreck, who stuttered every five seconds, which was a relief. Although when she asked me how long I planned to keep my bondage sessions a secret it kinda flipped a switch for me.

I would have shouted at her had it not been for Gold giving me that look. You know the one, the one that people give you when it's not the time or place to argue.

Red and Green came round soon after that, Red still in his wheelchair but he looked a lot better. Colour had returned to his cheeks and the bandage was no longer strapped around his head.

Green was as bubbly as usual, and fussed over Red as all of us got settled on the sofa. Considering not all of us could fit on it Gold had offered to grab some chairs from the kitchen so everyone could sit down. Now it really did feel like a group meeting.

Now, all we had to do was wait for was Blue, but considering she was travelling from Kanto we figured she might a while.

So Gold suggested something to pass the time.

"So...anyone know any good jokes?"

Red sighed and rolled his eyes, while Green jumped up and down on the sofa like a big kid.

"I do I do!" _This was going to be good...sense the sarcasm?_

"I knew a gay guy once who sounded like a Noctowl!"

Red raised an eyebrow in confusion before saying the words;

"Who?"

Then as if by command Green had doubled over in fits of giggles. Red still looked as nonchalant as ever, being totally serious about the whole thing. Even Gold started to laugh, I reckon he cottoned on to what he said. Crystal just looked confused, which wasn't surprising.

As Green continued to laugh Red flashed him a dangerous look.

"Why won't you tell me?"

I sighed, but smirked nonetheless. He obviously didn't understand the joke. Gold was dying beside me, trying to hide the laughter and failing miserably. Green's face went blank for a moment.

"...no, that was the joke."

"I don't get it." Crystal whined, scratching her head.

"I said...I know a guy who sounds like a Noctowl and then Red went who? Like hoot? The sound of an owl?"

I placed my hand to my head, whilst Gold was literally crying due to the laughter. Then the penny dropped for Crystal. She smiled wildly.

"Oh I get it! You basically said that it was Red who is gay!"

_God...this woman was slow. Although that joke was so shit it was unreal. But this was Green we were talking about. _

Red didn't look very amused.

"But...I don't sound like an owl Green..."

Instead of starting a world war off I changed the subject.

"Hey Gold, you should do your impression of Green!"

He blinked at me for a moment, like he misheard me.

"I'm sorry?"

"You heard me." I smirked, folding my arms, feeling pleased with changing the subject.

Green and Red looked at each other for a moment and shrugged, while Crystal seemed over enthusiastic to hear it. Gold chuckled softly, before scratching his head bashfully.

"But...I don't do an impression of Green."

"Don't be so modest! Everyone would love to hear it! It is brilliant!"

I wondered if anyone could sense the sarcasm in my words? I honestly had no idea if Gold could mimic Green, it was just to stop Red going all sulky on our asses about Green's joke. Let's hope he could think on the spot.

"Oh come on Gold!" Crystal cried, clasping her hands together.

"Yeah, you should make him sound like a gay owl." Red mused, giving daggers to his boyfriend, who winked playfully. Green snorted at the remark and relaxed in his seat.

"Don't be so ridiculous! No-one could ever mimic me! I am far too amazing to be copied!"

I looked at Gold, who probably felt like he had to come up with something just to stop all the talking. Well, at least it was passing the time until Blue came.

_Man she was missing the best part!._

"Well umm...since you asked..." He cleared his throat, cheeks burning furiously as all eyes watched him intently.

"Okay...hello, my name is Green, and man, I am like the sexiest man alive! All girls want to fuck me, but can't because I am totally gay for Red. But no-one can ever be as hot as me. I am just so freakin' perfect!"

Okay, I did laugh.

Uncontrollably.

To the point where I nearly fell off my chair.

Even though he didn't sound like Green..it was how camp he was behaving. _Oh my God!_

"Hahahaha! That is exactly what he sounds like!" Crystal joined in, snickering at Gold's impression.

Green didn't seem too amused, in fact he looked confused as hell. As he looked from Gold, to Crystal he shrugged his shoulder's.

"I don't sound like that, do I?"

Red smiled softly, chuckling under his breath. At least the joke about the gay owl was now officially off the agenda.

"You should be honoured, at least he said you were hot."

_Man...that was a low blow._

I looked at Gold and smiled. He seemed more relieved than happy, maybe because he was worried Green might attack him later for that? Who knew. Crystal was giggling wildly to herself, obviously loving how gay Gold made his impression.

"Are you trying to say that I'm not hot?" Green asked Red, not looking to happy.

Red shrugged his shoulder's, trying to fight a smile that wanted to tease his lips.

"Well you always say I'm hot whenever you're begging me to fuck you." I cringed.

_Okay...too much information._

"Okay, okay! Too much information guys!" Crystal held her hands up, obviously not enjoying the conversation. Considering she walked in on Gold and I doing the nasty on the kitchen counter I figured she deserved a break.

* * *

Then at that point the front door opened and in walked Blue, holding the plastic carrier bag that concealed the wretched blindfold.

_Well...she was a little late. _

She smiled wildly at all of us, waving slightly.

"Sorry I'm late guys! I got lost trying to find this damn apartment!"

I watched as the brunette closed the door and eased herself into one of the chairs, which was beside me. She flashed me a smile, and winked playfully. Obviously indicating to the blindfold in the bag. As I was about to speak to her some-one else did it for me.

"You are too late Blue."

I looked to see it was Crystal was spoke, and she had already seen what was in the see-through carrier bag. Blue blinked curiously for a moment.

"What do you mean? Did you start the meeting without me?"

I placed a hand to me face, as a heavy sigh escaped my lips.

_What the hell was Crystal doing?! Did she want everyone to know my business?_

"No, I meant...with the blindfold."

Now I really wanted to just leave now. Gold coughed uneasily in the background, which only confused Blue more. She glanced from Crystal, back to me, and then down to the bag in her hands.

Red and Green shared worried looks with each other, before deciding not to take part in the discussion.

"I don't...quite follow."

Crystal sighed, and I wondered if she would practically shout it from the rooftops.

_Wasn't this meeting meant to be about Cyan? What the hell went wrong?!_

"Ignore her! She doesn't know what she is talking about!" Gold cried out, nudging Crystal hard in the ribs, earning a disapproving scowl.

"What?! Shut up Gold, I know what I saw!"

Once again I literally tried to hide away inside my t-shirt, which I pulled up around my face in sheer embarrassment. If she blabbed to everyone I would never hear the end of it!

"Huh? Would some-one like to explain to me what the hell is going on?!" Blue shouted, her eyes burning in fury.

Red and Green shrugged, as if to say _'don't look at me'._ And then the intense gaze was on me. I sighed, wishing the ground would open up and take me to hell or something.

Or even in a room with Cyan! Anything was better than this.

"Earlier...I walked in...and I saw Gold and Silver fu-"

"Fighting!" Gold butted in, quickly pressing his hand over Crystal's mouth, which only enraged her more.

"Fighting?" Blue repeated, looking at me with a sadness in her eyes. I just went along with it and nodded meekly, eternally thankful for Gold's input.

"Yeah...it was silly really. We were fighting...in the kitchen...and Crystal came in and...well, she almost got hit by a plate!" Gold finished, smiling sheepishly.

Okay, that was over exaggerating, but still we could work with that. Blue gasped as she placed a hand on my shoulder.

"Oh my gosh! Are you okay? Did you have like a lover's spat or something?"

Crystal's muffles were starting to annoy me, I figured she would have given up by now, but obviously not.

"We are fine now.." I mumbled, watching the dark haired boy wrestle with the loud mouth.

_How had no-one noticed?_

"Man...I knew you had a temper Silver, but throwing plates? Remind me never to get on your bad side!" Green joked, relaxing on his chair, as Red just rolled his eyes playfully.

"Anyway! I called you all here about Cyan! Not about my temper, or our fighting habits!" I said defiantly, pulling my t-shirt back down.

Gold removed his hand from Crystal's mouth, but luckily she didn't say another word. Maybe because I mentioned Cyan's name or something. Green shifted forward in his seat, like I suddenly grasped his attention, and all eyes burned into me as I retold the events of last night;

"As we all expected...yes, Cyan is still alive..."

"That bastard!" Green whined, only to be shushed down by Red.

"And...he visited me last night whilst I was in hospital..."

Blue gasped again, dropping the plastic bag on the floor in shock.

"OH MY GOD! WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?"

I sighed softly, not wanting to seem annoyed at her. I just wanted to finish my sentence without some-one interrupting.

"Because he didn't want you to worry." Gold answered for me, flashing me a small smile.

"Yes, anyway! He visited me last night in hospital, and told me that he is trying to get at Gold, to hurt me. If I hadn't pushed him away he might have hurt me too."

"That fucking prick! I swear I will kill the fucker!" Green growled, clenching his hand into a fist. Red gently placed his hand on top of it, and shook his head slightly, which instantly defused the hothead.

"Hurt you? How?" Blue asked gently, her sparkling azure eyes never leaving my own.

I didn't really want to tell everyone about how my father abused me as a child, even though Crystal knew half the story. Instead I decided on something else.

"In a violent way, but I fought him off."

"But why would Cyan be after Gold? He doesn't have any issues with him, does he?" Red joined in, looking perplexed by the whole thing.

"I said the same thing!" Gold cried, laughing nervously.

It seemed no-one understood the reasoning to Cyan's actions. It wasn't personal against Gold, it was just to hurt me.

"He wants to hurt Gold, to get back at me for what I did to his baby brother. He thinks that by hurting Gold I will feel the same pain he did."

Green shook his head and sighed deeply, while Red still looked confused. When Cyan attacked him it wasn't anything personal, he just had this paranoia Red was going to tell me everything. Funny really. Red and I hardly were considered friends.

"What a psychopath!" Blue groaned, shaking her head.

"Well, I think that was obvious! He attacked Red with a fucking cricket bat!" Green wailed, pointing to the dark haired champion, who sat comfortably in his wheelchair. Yeah, I didn't need reminding. That was merely the tip of the iceberg.

"So we are all vulnerable to his next attack?" Crystal murmured quietly.

I nodded.

"Yes, so that is why I think we all need to pair up, so we aren't alone"

Gold smiled, quite happy with the fact he was paired up with me, and considering he was staying here it would make things a lot easier.

"But how will that work? I live in Kanto." Blue asked.

"For the time being Crystal will either have to go with you, or you go to her house. That is the only way round this."

Both girl's looked at each other for a moment, before nodding. I was sure they could come to some arrangement, it wasn't like they hated each other.

"And I will stay with Red here in Johto." Green offered, smiling at his lover, who just rolled his eyes.

Well, this seemed to be going well, better than I expected. At least if we were in pairs the chances of Cyan hurting anyone was slim.

"Wait! I have a question!" Crystal blurted out, holding her hand up like we were in trainer school or something.

"What?" I grumbled, still feeling annoyed with the blue haired girl. She put her hand down as her eyes met the floor.

"What if...he isn't alone on this?"

"Huh?" Gold groaned, looking at the girl beside him.

"I am serious! What if he has an accomplice?"

Well, that thought hadn't crossed my mind, but every time I saw Cyan he was on his own. He didn't have outside help to back him up. I doubted Crystal was right.

"I'm sure we would have known by now." I answered, leaning back in my seat.

"But what if he or she is in the background, like helping him but without drawing attention to themselves?" Crystal continued, looking around the room like she had seen a ghost. I sighed.

"You watch too many Crime Scene Investigation films, you know that?" Green mused softly, before laughing.

Soon enough everyone was laughing too, apart from myself and Crystal. She seemed convinced that he wasn't alone, and what if she was right? Then even if we were in pairs we would still be vulnerable.

"Yeah, Green is right for once. We would have known by now if he had some-one helping him." Red added in.

"I think having just Cyan to deal with is enough for now." Blue complained, shaking her head.

This whole meeting was starting to become very depressing.

_Was it only me who thought that?_

"I guess we should just consider it for now.." I decided, not wanting to take the matter any further. Everyone nodded in agreement. Well at least that was settled. Red would stay with Green, Blue with Crystal, and I would personally ensure Gold's safety.

One way or another.

* * *

After half an hour the conversation had swiftly changed direction, from the imminent threat to a lighter note, Gold's birthday.

_Which was in a few days! Why had it slipped my mind?Oh yeah, the whole trying to save Gold's life fiasco. _

"I have hired a community hall for the event! It's so beautiful! It has lots of windows and stuff, and we can make it look pretty with banners!" Crystal squeaked happily.

Everyone seemed excited about the upcoming party, apart from Gold.

_Maybe I got him wrong, perhaps he didn't want a big fuss?_

"Well, count me in on being chief decorator!" Blue offered, holding her hand up high in the air before laughing.

"Of course! And Green!" The brunette turned at the mention of his name. "Could you try to get some music for the night? Like a DJ or something?"

Green smirked playfully as he relaxed in his chair.

"But of course! I know lots of people, so yeah, I can't see it being a problem!"

But I had a major problem.

_What the fuck was I supposed to buy Gold? I never buy anyone anything for birthday's, but we weren't just acquaintances any more, were we? Shit...I'd have to think about that later._

"Don't think for one second I am singing!" Red cried in defence, seeing Green's cheeky smile.

Oh yeah, Green had spoke of that before. Apparently he had a good voice, or something.

"Oh come on Red! It could be your birthday present for Gold!" Green encouraged, wiggling his eyebrows at the annoyed champion.

"No, it's fine. Honestly." Gold tried, holding his hands up in defence.

Okay, all this talk of birthday's was depressing me, so whilst everyone spoke about cakes, and birthday related drama I got up from my seat and headed towards the kitchen for some piece and quiet.

As I got to the sink I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, vaguely hearing laughs and raised voices in the distance.

_How could they all be so happy right now? Was I the only one who was concerned? Yes, Crystal had planned this huge celebration for Gold's eighteenth birthday, but somehow it didn't feel like there was much to celebrate. _

_In __fact I had this awful feeling that things just were not meant to go as smoothly as I would have liked. _

_Call it...intuition._

* * *

**Author's Note: DUN DUN DUUUUNNN! :D Ah, bondage :) who doesn't love OTP bondage?**


	21. On the safe side

**Author's Note: Hello everyone! Wow...not that long to go till the ending! D: I'm going to be so sad when this is all over. But good news! I have plans to write a collaboration, and also a Palletshipping fic of my own! xD No spoilers as of yet. So for now, enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter Twenty One: On the safe side**

"Hey...are you okay?"

I jolted upright from the sink, not realising I was gripping it for dear life until that voice entered my ears. As I slowly looked over my shoulder I noticed it was Green. He had his arms folded, and was giving me _that _look, you know the one, where they want to ask you about something but don't. I forced a smile quickly.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

Green's brow furrowed significantly before shaking his head

"Don't lie to me Silver. It seems like you have something on your mind."

_Damn, how did he know?_

But still, I wasn't prepared to spill all my emotions out for him to see. No, I was quite happy just festering in my own self inflicted misery for now. I turned fully to see him and continued keeping up the charade.

"Why would I have anything on my mind?"

Green shrugged half heartedly.

"I don't know, unless it's about Cyan again."

The sheer mention of his name caused a horrible shiver to dance down my spine, which Green noticed almost immediately. He smiled softly, chuckling.

"Well if it's any consolation I am on your side. He is a psycho, and needs to be stopped. I don't give a shit if his brother killed himself over something stupid you said to him, or whatever the reason was. The moment he attacked Red...was the moment he made enemies with me, and trust me, no-one wants me after them."

That was comforting, but it wasn't about people taking sides.

_Why were they all so forgiving? They knew that all this shit was happening because of me, and I had half expected one of them at least to go nuts at me or something. But they didn't. They supported me, and I didn't know why._

Sighing softly I bowed my head, allowing my trail of depressing thought carry me away.

"Yeah..I know..."I murmured weakly.

"Hey! Cheer up buddy! Gold's birthday is in a few days! You should be celebrating, not feeling down in the dumps!"

I looked up to see Green's kind smiling face, and I knew that I should at least make an effort. It was a major milestone for Gold, being eighteen and all, and I guess I owed him at least to try to celebrate it. My hands gripped the sink behind me for support as I nodded weakly.

"I guess you're right."

"And besides! All of us are going to be there so I doubt Cyan will launch an attack."

_How was it possible for Green to stay so positive all the time? He just oozed optimism and I swear I was jealous._

Then he walked towards me until his arms wrapped around me in a tight hug. For a moment I was unsure of what to do, and just allowed my arms to stay frozen in mid air, until I heard his voice again.

"Calm down Silver, it's only a hug."

As I inhaled deeply I allowed the taller male to hold me in the kitchen, and was surprised with how comforting it was. It was like all my problems were fizzling away, and he was the cause of it. Once again the scent of strong cologne entered my nose as I held the taller boy, but it didn't bother me any more.

It was just the smell of Green.

"Everything will be fine, just you wait and see." He said softly, and a part of me wondered what the hell I did I do to deserve such kindness?

_I was a bad egg, some-one who fucking caused a kid to kill themselves! Kindness was wasted on me._

But still, right now I gladly accepted it. Anything was better than festering in my own guilt.

* * *

Once I had calmed down enough, and Green has cracked a few terrible jokes about Cyan I decided to accompany him back to living room where everyone else was. They were still discussing Gold's birthday arrangement's and the poor soul looked like he desperately wanted to get out of there.

So, as I sat down beside him I decided to save him from this scene.

"Hey Gold, don't you need to pick up some clothes from your house?"

Large golden eyes blinked at me for a moment as it finally registered.

"Oh yeah! Oops, I forgot!"

"Well, why don't you take somebody with you, like just to be on the safe side?" Green suggested, relaxing in his chair once again. Gold nodded and flashed me a smile. I was sure he was grateful for my interference.

_But who would go with him? _

Well, Red wouldn't be much use in his state so we all suggested he would stay here with me, and Crystal offered to accompany Gold because she had to stop off at her house along the way.

As expected Green volunteered to keep watch over both of them, because being in three's was safer, apparently.

_But what the hell did I know? _

So as the three of them left my apartment only Blue, Red and myself remained. It was weird being in the same room as Red again without any input from Green.

He still seemed nonchalant as ever, but every now and then a flash of something that resembled a personality shone through. But that was down to Green mainly. I sighed softly as I relaxed on my sofa, trying to ignore Blue and Red's aimless chit chat about God knows what.

"It's nice to see that you're on the mend though, you could've died because of that psycho!" Blue cried out beside me. Red sighed and rolled his eyes.

"I don't understand why everyone hates him, yes okay, he has issues...but don't you see why? His brother killed himself because of something Silver did. I'd say it was only fair."

I blinked rapidly.

_Was Red defending Cyan here?_

Blue gasped and almost fell off the sofa in shock, and to be honest I almost did too.

_How could he defend him even after he tried to kill him?!_

"Have you lost your mind?! He tried to kill you Red!"

"No, he was making a statement. He was showing Silver what he could do, and quite easily I might add, to the people he cares about. I doubt it was ever personal."

_So, divided opinions...I had expected this to be honest, and Red and I hardly ever saw eye to eye._

I had thought better of him since knowing Green though. Perhaps because Green was so loud, and brash, and his personality sort of captivated you.

"RED!" Blue cried, puffing her cheeks out in rage. "Cyan is a fucking psycho! Yes, okay...his brother died, but Silver didn't hold a fucking gun to his head, or shove the pills down his throat! He had his own mind! He didn't have to do it!"

I looked across at Blue, at the way her eyes sparkled in determination, how she defended me with her life. I honestly didn't deserve it, but it was nice nonetheless.

Red placed a hand to his head in annoyance.

"As much as that is a valid point, Silver still said something horrible to him, which caused the events to spiral out of control. If he hadn't then all this would have been avoided, and no-one would've got hurt."

Okay, now this was irritating me.

_I already knew I fucked up! I didn't need reminding! _

I gripped my head tightly with my fingers, trying to ignore the argument.

"But Cyan didn't have to act like this! There are much better ways than trying to inflict pain and torment on other people! Okay, so he wants revenge. I get that. But, why hurt everyone else? If he hated Silver so much he would've killed him by now!"

Red clicked his tongue in annoyance at the brunette.

"It obviously isn't that simple. Considering Silver hurt the person who Cyan cared about most, he now wants to inflict the same pain on him. Perhaps...once he believes it has been achieved he won't bother anyone any more."

Then a thought hit me.

_Yes! That was it! I knew just how to get rid of Cyan once and for all!_

I sat upright, and cleared my throat.

"I think I know a way of stopping Cyan for good."

"You do?" Blue asked, tilting her head curiously to the side, like a confused Eevee. I nodded in determination.

"Yes. All we have to do is stage Gold's death!"

"Whoa...hold up." Red interrupted, holding his hands up. "Stage his death?"

"Yes! We make it seem like Gold is dead, when actually he isn't, then I'll act all upset and whatever, then Cyan is bound to leave us all alone!"

_Why the hell didn't I think of this plan sooner? It was so freakin' obvious! _

Blue's eyes lit up as the information sunk in.

"You're right! Then Cyan will assume that he has succeeded in hurting you as much as you hurt him, and will back off!"

I nodded, feeling slightly proud of my plan. Now, we just had to figure out how to implement it properly. Red shook his head.

"This is all well and all, but how are we going to do that? Isn't Cyan going to have to be there anyway when Gold fakes being dead?"

That was a valid point, but I had a feeling he would strike soon, and I knew when it was most likely to occur.

"Cyan will probably show up at Gold's birthday party."

Blue gasped once again, pressing a hand to her chest.

"It seems like a logical idea." Red mumbled, giving the idea some thought.

"Do you think he will...try to kill him?!" Blue panicked, as she looked at me for the answers.

I honestly didn't know if that was his intention or not, but I had a feeling that was the battle ground. We needed to be prepared for the worst case scenario.

"I'm not sure."

"Well maybe not kill, but I reckon there will be some sort of commotion." Red mused, placing a hand to his chin in thought.

"Commotion?" Blue repeated.

The champion nodded, before allowing his eyes to stare up at the ceiling.

"Yes, like a bomb exploding or something, I doubt Cyan would arrive without a big entrance."

I frowned, hating the fact Red was probably right. We had to be best prepared for this.

_But how?_

"Maybe Green should bring his gun then..." Blue thought aloud, causing all the hairs on my arms to stiffen almost immediately.

_Wait...what?! Green...owned a gun?! SINCE WHEN?!_

"I don't think that is a good idea...you know how angry Green is about this whole Cyan fiasco." Red said calmly.

_How on Earth could he be calm?! Did he know about the fact he owned a gun?! Oh my God..._

I ran my fingers through my hair anxiously.

_But...say he did bring the gun, just to be safe. Would it actually help matters?_

"But we need to be prepared too Red! We can't just be sitting ducks, waiting for something to happen!" Blue cried, getting evermore frustrated with the champion, who sat in his wheelchair.

He folded his arms and nodded.

"That is also true, but guns and violence is not the answer. Cyan is quite obviously psychologically damaged...so our best weapon we have is...our minds."

I blinked for a moment. Well, none of us were psychic so that wasn't going to work at all.

"How the hell will that work?" I asked.

"In much the same way a poker game works." Red replied, nonchalantly. "You fool your opponent into thinking your hand, or your next move will be something amazing, when in actual fact it isn't. So by bluffing, your opponent ends up giving up, and you end up the winner."

I glanced at Blue for a moment, before allowing the information to sink in.

_Like...a poker game? So, by bluffing Cyan would believe us, and then we would end up winning?_ Blue smiled softly.

"I think I understand. So if Silver fakes being upset over Gold's_ 'death'_ Cyan will believe it, and then leave us alone?"

Red nodded, looking very proud of himself for that moment. Well, it was the best idea so far. Now we had to hope something happened for Cyan to appear so we could put the plan into action.

"Think you can create some fake tears?" Blue asked me, giggling to herself. I shrugged. Well, I had no idea if I was capable, but I'm sure I could try.

"I'll give it a try."

"Good, you might need to practice." Red added in, smirking playfully. And that was a rare opportunity to actually see him smile, even if it was only a smirk. It was progress, and that was enough.

* * *

As evening settled in, and Blue, Red and I were watching some stupid film on the television the front door opened. Loud jostling voices entered my ears and immediately I turned to face them. It seemed like they were arguing over something.

I noticed Gold held an envelope in his hands, which hadn't been opened and was just staring at it in confusion. Green and Crystal were bickering about something, as they carried Gold's belongings in a rucksack. I couldn't quite understand it all.

"Guys! Can you shut up! I'm trying to watch this!" Blue grumbled, waving her hand in the air in annoyance.

Green and Crystal shut up almost immediately, but their faces still appeared pain stricken.

_ Had something happened?_

"Is everything okay?" I asked softly, trying not to disturb Blue. Gold sighed and sat on the arm of the sofa, beside me. His eyes continued scanning the envelope in his hands.

"I'm not sure..." He responded.

"Gold found that envelope posted through his letterbox." Green added in, standing behind the sofa, along with Crystal. She nodded in response and dropped the rucksack on the floor.

_But it was just an envelope, why did he look like his whole world was crashing down?_

"Aren't you going to open it?" I pursued, watching as his whole body stiffened considerably. Then he shook his head wildly.

"No...I don't recognise the hand writing."

Without thinking I took the pale blue envelope from his hands and studied the writing. I didn't recognise it either, but it was addressed to Gold.

_Maybe it was an early birthday card?_

"It's probably just a birthday card..."I grumbled, passing it back to the dark haired boy. He shrugged weakly. I heard Green sigh, as he leant on the back of sofa, directly behind my head.

"Gold has a feeling that it's not as innocent as it seems,"

I glanced at the emerald eyed boy for a moment, before thinking it through.

_What on Earth did he mean? It was only a card._

"Guys...as much as this conversation is completely riveting...I am trying to watch this." Red groaned, giving a stern look towards Green's direction, who merely smirked and bobbed his tongue out playfully.

As Gold continued to study the envelope a part of me just wanted to open it and get this all over with.

"Just open the fucking thing!" I cried in annoyance.

"I can't!"

Biting the inside of my lip I was getting frustrated with this. _It was only a stupid card! _So I grabbed the envelope from Gold's hands, watching as he desperately tried to get it back.

"Hey! That's mine!"

"Well...you're not going to open it, so I will!"

The dark haired boy stopped struggling and just sat still beside me, watching as carefully I tore the envelope open, wondering if there was like a ticking bomb in here or something.

_Doubtful._

I didn't realise it at the time but everyone was staring at me, and the object in my hands. Perhaps they all wanted to know too.

As I ripped the envelope off it revealed a birthday card, and instantly I threw it at Gold's face, watching as it collided with his cheek.

"You fucking idiot! It's just a birthday card!"

As the card landed in his lap he picked it up and read the message on the front of the card, out loud so we could all hear it.

"It says..._'I like you so much I'm giving you two birthday presents, maybe __even three or four'..._" Gold paused as he opened the card to read the rest of the message. "..._'Try not to think about it and have a happy day.'_..."

The whole room went silent as we just watched Gold's face change from apprehension to utter horror. His hands were shaking as he held the card, and instantly I took it from him to see for myself. As my eyes read the writing I noticed the signature at the bottom of the card.

_It was signed...by Cyan!_

"You have got to be kidding me!" I cried, not quite believing this.

"What is it?" Green asked, glancing over my shoulder to get a better view of the card.

_Why on Earth would Cyan send Gold a birthday card?_ None of this made sense,

"Who is the card from?" Blue asked quietly, her interest completely consumed in this scene, ignoring the film that was currently showing. Green growled angrily, before snatching the card from my hands.

"THAT PRICK!" He cried, and a part of me wondered if he would rip it apart in anger.

"Just what is going on?" Crystal added in, large blue eyes staring up at the older male.

Then, like a game of pass the parcel the card was handed around each and every one of us.

"You have got to be kidding me!" She cried in shock, holding the card closer to her face, obviously believing she was hallucinating or something. But she wasn't. It was very real.

Gold still seemed on edge about the whole thing, but was slightly calmer than he had been.

"But...why would Cyan send Gold a birthday card?" Blue pondered, putting her hand to her chin in thought.

"Because this is quite obviously nothing more than a game to him..." Red joined in, rather calmly, causing all of us to stare at him. The champion sighed as the card sat in his hands, and he studied it carefully.

"A game?" I repeated.

Red nodded.

"Yes. This is nothing more than a game to him. By sending a birthday card to the one person he wishes to destroy? It's like he is mocking each and every one of us."

_That Cyan...he was a piece of work. And we had to stop him! _

"Then that means...he must be close by if he delivered the card to Gold's house!" Crystal shrieked in shock, clasping her hands over her mouth.

That was true. If Cyan had delivered this by hand then he must have been close by, but where?

"...well, the thought was in the right place." Gold joked, chuckling nervously. I could tell he was worried, even through all the laughter, but it was only to show everyone that he was okay.

But he wasn't.

"I don't like the hidden meaning behind the card either..." Red mused, as he looked at the front of it once again, studying the font.

"What hidden meaning?" I asked, starting to get annoyed with this whole situation.

"It says..._'I like you so much I'm giving you two birthday presents, maybe even three or four'_...perhaps it is like a warning for what is about to come?"

_Shit...this was really bad_.

So, as I predicted something major was going to happen, and soon. We all had to be prepared. Even though it was difficult to prepare for something we didn't know. But it was worth a shot at least.

After everyone had calmed down, Red, Blue and myself discussed the plan we were to put into action when Cyan decided to make his move. The plan to stage Gold's death.

Of course, Gold wasn't too happy about playing dead, but when Red assured him that Cyan would back off he was instantly on board the idea.

Of course Green liked his idea much better, which involved bringing his gun along to the birthday party. The idea was instantly dismissed by Red, who claimed that Green's bad temper would only hinder his plan.

And as much as Green didn't want to agree with the champion he did in the end.

So it was decided. Gold would fake being dead, and I would somehow pretend to be upset about the whole thing, causing Cyan to believe he had won the game, and ultimately leave us all alone. It was the safest way, and would ensure no casualties.

"But...like I said before, what if Cyan isn't alone? He might have outside help!" Crystal grumbled sadly, fidgeting with her hands in her lap. Green sighed, and looked up at the ceiling in thought.

"Perhaps...but for now let's just assume it's just Cyan we are up against."

"If Cyan believes that vengeance has been served, he will be satisfied with that and leave. Then no-one gets hurt, or dies." Red stated proudly.

I knew he was against this whole thing, but now this whole fiasco had gotten way out of hand and this was the only possible solution we could think of.

"I swear to God Red you always have to be a party pooper..." Green complained, folding his arms in annoyance.

Red smirked softly, and once again I saw that spark of a personality shine through.

"Well if you want to spend a lifetime in prison for murder, then please...go right ahead. I'm sure you would love it in there."

Then he did the most magical thing ever.

_He laughed! A genuine laugh_.

I had never seen Red laugh like that before, even if it was at Green's misfortune. It sort of made me want to smile.

"You know... you could be my alibi..." Green said playfully, nudging the champion on the arm gently, wiggling his eyebrows.

"Anyway, so what are we going to do now?" Blue asked, looking from the two bickering guys to me and Gold. We shrugged at the same time, which was a little weird.

_How did we do that?_

"Well duh! We have a party to plan!" Crystal squeaked happily. I sighed, placing a hand to my head.

_Great, even after everything she still wanted to plan this thing?_

"Oh yeah, I guess we do." Blue joined in. I swear those girl's would be the death of me, and probably Gold too. He just smiled awkwardly, not really enjoying all this fuss, given the circumstances.

The birthday card lay flat on the coffee table, open for all of us to see. I could barely make out Cyan's terrible hand writing as he signed his name and a violent shiver danced down my spine.

Our plan just had to work, we had no choice.

* * *

As evening started to turn into night time Gold and I said our goodbye's to everyone, who all went home, of course in pairs like we agreed. It was nice to have my apartment feel normal once again. All the noise and commotion was not good for my health.

So as I relaxed on my bed, wearing my old black t-shirt and boxers I just waited. Gold was using the bathroom, and usually it took him a while.

As I closed my eyes for a moment a bright light burst out of my trouser pockets and faded away to reveal Hoothoot. He cooed softly before hopping onto the bed beside me.

I had almost forgot I caught this thing.

_Oh yeah...and I called it Gold._

"Hey..."I mumbled, gently patting the tiny owl's head.

"Hoot~" He called happily, as he bounced up and down on his one leg. Even his enthusiasm was like Gold. How uncanny.

But still, this tiny owl made me wonder. Why did it even follow me in the first place, I was hardly the nicest of people, especially to my Pokemon.

Sneasel went through most of that, yet somehow she still managed to evolve into a Weavile. And she risked her life for me without even thinking about it.

_Did I really mean that much to them?_

"Hoot! Hoot!" The owl chirped happily as he bounced up on top of my head and nestled there for a while.

So I lay on my bed with Hoothoot on my head, in total silence. I didn't mind it though.

I sighed softly.

"Why the hell did you even follow me? You could have stayed in the forest or something..."

I felt Hoothoot flutter his wings, which tickled the side of my face, causing me to laugh.

_Was he trying to tell me that I was being stupid?_

"Silver?"

At the mention of my name I sat upright, watching as my owl Pokemon leapt down from my head to my shoulder. It's large eyes scanned the intruder, which was quite obviously Gold.

The dark haired boy was just about visible in the dim light, as he scrubbed his wet hair dry with a towel. He was wearing the same attire as myself, an old t-shirt and boxers.

"Yeah?" I mumbled, not really wanting to draw attention to myself, and the fact I was playing with a Hoothoot. It would kind of ruin my image there.

But I assumed he noticed the arrival when he started staring at my shoulder.

"Is that...a Hoothoot on your shoulder?"

As he pointed to the small owl, in shyness it buried itself behind my hair, which felt really weird on my scalp. I wasn't used to things hiding there after all.

But still, I thought better than to ignore his question.

"Yes, it is."

"But...I never knew you had one of those." Gold commented softly, before throwing the towel in the laundry basket and sitting on the edge of my bed. I smirked.

"I didn't... until I bumped into it in Ilex forest."

It's wings fluttered once again in my hair, which tickled so without thinking I just laughed, trying to stop Hoothoot from it's onslaught.

Eventually I grabbed the tiny owl and held him in my arms. He looked happy, which was nice. Gold smiled softly.

"He looks really happy, and obviously really likes you."

I smiled, and snorted in approval.

_Well...he was called Gold, after all._

"I named him after you." I admitted, hearing Hoothoot coo softly as I held him.

Gold's eyes widened in shock.

"Why on Earth did you name a Hoothoot after me?"

I looked down at the tiny owl, who had settled down now quite comfortably and didn't seem so frightened of Gold any more. I shrugged my shoulder's weakly.

"After I accidentally knocked it down from a tree it decided to follow me to Cherrygrove City. I figured it had the same persona as you, and at the time...well, you know I just came back from Kanto. So, I named it after you. Stupid really."

Gold smiled softly and outstretched a hand to gently pat the owl's head. He didn't cower or hide away, he just allowed Gold to pet him, which was nice.

"So...he is called Gold too?"

I nodded.

"Yeah..."

I paused. I just had a great idea, and it would be for the best anyway. As I looked down at the tiny owl, who seemed content at being petted by Gold I sighed softly.

"And...I want you to have him."

"What?" Gold's voice sounded shocked, as he looked from me to the Hoothoot in my arms. I nodded defiantly.

"I want you to have him, Gold...call it an early birthday present if you want to."

I could clearly see Gold's eyes sparkling in the dim light, and without thinking I handed the owl Pokemon to him, wondering if he was okay with this.

Hoothoot seemed to be fine, even though it had originally been attached to me. Gold could raise it better anyway. He was better off with some-one like him.

"But...Silver...Hoothoot is yours,"

I shook my head.

"No, now he is yours. But you better take care of him or else." I warned, watching as Hoothoot seemed rather happy at the exchange.

Even though it was a good thing a part of me felt saddened to see the little guy go, but I knew he would be in good hands. Gold smiled wildly as he stared at Hoothoot. He now had another addition to his team.

"Silver..."

"Just shut up and accept him! Or I'll change my mind!"

I watched the two of them for a moment before smirking. It was nice to see that glimmer of hope in his eyes again, just like when we were kids.

Gold used to get so excited about new Pokemon, or just being with his old friends. This was no different.

"Thanks..."

* * *

Once Hoothoot had been returned to his Pokeball and was now part of Gold's team we both lay on my bed, staring at the ceiling in thought. Time just seemed to go so fast nowadays, like everything was sped up on purpose.

_Gold's birthday had once been far away...and now, it was literally just round the corner. Judgement day._

"Do you really think your plan will work?" Gold asked, as he lay on his side to face me.

Sighing softly I nodded, desperately longing to believe myself. We had no choice, it had to work.

_If it didn't...well, we were all in trouble._

"I can't see it not working."

Gold exhaled deeply as he lay beside me.

"Do you honestly believe Cyan would...try to kill me?"

I glanced across at the dark haired boy. His face seemed pained for a moment, completely unlike the old Gold I knew.

_But how could I tell him that a part of me did believe that Cyan would try to hurt him? It would only make him worry. So instead...I lied._

"No...he won't."

Then Gold smiled as his arm wrapped around my waist, pulling me closer.

"Well to be honest I would like to think I could kick his ass if he tried." He joked, chuckling afterwards.

And I wanted to believe it too. But Cyan was so unpredictable there was no telling what he could do if he put his mind to it.

"Just don't worry too much, it's not like I am going to let him hurt you, is it?"

Gold looked up at me with large questioning amber eyes, before closing them for a moment.

"No...I guess not."

"Just, relax. Leave it to me. I'll sort this mess out."

And as we lay on my bed, embracing in the darkness I could feel myself getting drowsier the longer time progressed.

Gold's birthday was just around the corner, and I had to make sure my plan would work, if not only for Gold's sake, but for my own too.

* * *

**Author's Note: Short chapter, but the next one will be much longer! I promise some major drama coming soon! So stay tuned! Please read and review, it makes a girl very happy :) Thank you!**


	22. Happy Birthday

**Author's Note: Ah! Only two more chapters to go! D: I can't believe it! Also sorry it took so long to update, I have been busy with work and stuff, but hopefully this will be worth the wait. Let the drama ensue!**

_**'I think my friend said "Stick it in the back of her head."**_

_**I think my friend said "Two of them are sisters,"**_

"_**I'm a murder tramp, murder tramp," I think I said.**_

"_**You're a murder boy, birthday boy." I think he said...'**_

* * *

**Chapter Twenty Two: Happy Birthday**

**A week later~**

It was strange. Nothing bad had occurred since Gold had received the birthday card, and a part of me wondered if Cyan was literally biding his time, or had merely given up at last. But I doubted he would let me off so easily.

And now it was Gold's eighteenth birthday today, and everyone was very excited over everything. Crystal had rented a community hall in Olivine City for the party, and given it had a large room she reckoned it would be the perfect place. Trouble was it would take a lot of decorating.

But luckily I wasn't assigned that job.

I was assigned a worse job. Somehow I had to go to the bakery and pick up Gold's birthday cake, which Crystal had ordered and was due to be picked up today. Of course I was given the worst job, but I suppose it was better than decorating a hall.

Whilst Blue and Crystal got everything sorted Red, who was now out of his wheelchair and felt a lot better, took Gold out for a few hours so he would be oblivious to the whole thing. He had a rough idea that he was going to have a party, but he didn't need to be there when they were decorating. There had to be some element of surprise at least.

Red used some excuse about shopping for Pokemon food, and Gold immediately jumped at the idea.

So, that left myself to get the cake.

_Great._

As I left my apartment I noticed that Green was waiting on the stairs, leading up to the door. He shot me an amused smirk, as he folded his arms.

"Ah, so you finally decided to make a move, huh?"

I shot the taller male a disapproving look, to which he only chuckled. We still thought it was better to be in pairs at least, just to be on the safe side.

"Shut up Green, I don't even want to do this."

As I walked up to the emerald eyed boy, he shrugged half heartedly.

"Well, I suppose this is better than doing what the girl's are doing..."

He had a point there. If it was left up to me the banners would all be red and black, and I quite frankly had no taste when it came to making things look 'pretty'. It might look good for a funeral, but not a party.

* * *

As Green and I walked through Goldenrod City towards the bakery I sighed. A troubling thought continued to resurface in my mind.

_What if Cyan was waiting for the right moment to strike? Or, what if Crystal was right and he did have outside help? Maybe we weren't prepared enough for this._

"Hey, snap out of it!" Green called out, tapping the back of my head slightly, which snapped me out of my daze. As I glared up at the taller male, he smiled softly.

"Stop worrying about things! I'm bringing the gun just to be safe."

_So, he really was going to do that?! Did Red know?_

"What about Red? Does he know?" I asked.

Green chuckled, only it seemed a nervous one at that.

"Nope. If he knew he might try to take the bullets out or something. We need it just in case something does happen."

So, we did have a back up if things went terribly wrong, but why did I keep assuming that they would? Gold might just be able to have the best eighteenth birthday party ever, without any interruptions, or maniacs interfering.

_Maybe._

When Green and I finally reached the bakery and they handed us the birthday cake I couldn't believe what was written in the red icing. Crystal had spelt birthday wrong, for a start.

_Since when is birthday spelt like Brithday? And I was almost sure it had marzipan on it. Gold...hated marzipan._

So as we left the shop I just glared at the monstrosity, covered by a see-through plastic container.

"It seems like a great cake!" Green beamed, only I wasn't so keen.

_Why did I let her do this? She couldn't even get the spelling right! _

Sighing deeply I wondered if we could do anything about this.

"Green..." I mumbled, causing the older male to look at me.

"Yeah?"

"What do you know about baking cakes?"

His eyes widened for a moment, before a large cheeky grin smothered his features.

"Well...I'd say I'm not too bad."

I nodded. Maybe we could ditch this cake and bake a new one in time for the party tonight? If Green knew how to bake then it could work.

"How do you feel about baking a new birthday cake?" I asked, watching at how his face morphed into confusion.

"But...we already have one."

"Have you seen this?!" I cried, pausing just to get my point across. I pointed to the writing, at how wonky it was, and the fact it had marzipan!

_Gold hated that stuff. He was a sucker for Victoria Sponge cake, Even I knew that!_

Green blinked rapidly.

"Well...the writing is a little...off, but it's still okay."

"GOLD HATES MARZIPAN!" I practically screamed at the emerald eyed boy in the street, who looked closer at the cake. Then he placed a hand to his chin in thought.

"Oh...well, this is a problem."

Rolling my eyes I just wanted to throw this God forsaken thing at his face right now.

_How could he be so calm?!_

The party was due to start tonight, and it was 11:00am. We didn't have that long to start baking a new one!

"That is why I asked if you could bake, you moron!"

Green smiled softly, puffing his chest out subconsciously.

"Of course I can bake!"

"Then let's get rid of this abomination and make a new one!" I cried, not quite believing I hadn't dropped it on the floor yet in shock. Oh well, the Pokemon could eat it or something.

Once we made a swift trip to the shop to grab some decorations for the cake we headed back to my apartment. We even walked past the Goldenrod Department Store, which was still cordoned off from the public ever since Red got attacked. I wondered if the Police had figured out who did it yet.

I handed Green the ghastly monstrosity that was Gold's birthday cake so I could open my apartment door. We had a lot of work to do, and fast.

As the door swung open I was greeted immediately by Weavile, and Gold's Aipom, who had chosen to house-sit while we were gone. They both seemed very happy, maybe because they could sense we had cake or something.

I smiled, and hugged my partner, who nuzzled my face happily, as Green just stood there, holding the plastic container.

"Hey guys, how do you fancy helping us out?" I asked both of them, watching as both Weavile and Aipom looked at each other in confusion.

"We have this really horrible looking cake, and we need volunteers to eat it. Do you guys want to eat it?"

It was as if I said they had won the lottery or something. I have never seen them so enthusiastic in all my life.

"Weeaaavvv~!" Weavile cried, nodding frantically, while Aipom bounced up and down on the carpet. Well, at least that was settled. Green placed the plastic container on the coffee table, and we watched as Aipom and Weavile started to eat the monstrosity, obviously not caring about the marzipan, or the weird lettering.

At least there would be no evidence to trace it back to here. Crystal really needed to think things through a little more.

"So, what sort of cake are we making?" Green asked, as he rummaged through the bag, looking at the cake decorations we bought. Well, considering Gold liked Victoria Sponge cake I thought it would be beneficial to roll with that.

"A Victoria Sponge cake, reckon you could do it?"

I watched as the older male stood tall, rolling his sleeves up his arms, ready to take on the challenge.

"Of course I can! It'll be...a piece of cake!" He winked, and started to laugh at his own joke, which to tell the truth sucked major ass. But it did cause me to smile. I gave one final look at the two Pokemon, who were now throwing cake at each other playfully.

_Well, as long as they were enjoying themselves._

I rolled my own sleeves up, ready to get into the chore of baking with Green.

_It sounded like a corny television show..._

* * *

Once both Green and I got into the kitchen he started rearranging the utensils. I assumed he knew what he was doing so I didn't give any input. After all, he said it would be easy.

"Right, now all we need is the ingredients." He finalised, looking over at me.

_Wait...what? Was he telling me to find them? I didn't even know what went into a cake!_

"And what ingredients are those?" I asked, leaning against one of the marbled counters, vaguely remembering how Gold and I almost had sex in here a week ago.

_And now...we were baking a cake in here. The irony._

"Right, we need eggs, butter, sugar, self raising flour and vanilla essence." I blinked at the taller boy.

_Vanilla essence? What the hell was that?_

I didn't even know what I had in my fridge. It was pot luck most of the time.

"Vanilla essence?" I asked, unsure about it. Maybe I heard it wrong. Green nodded, smiling softly.

"Yes! It comes in a small bottle."

Rolling my eyes I decided to look anyway, even though I was pretty sure I had none. Well, the eggs were easy. I had tons of them, and sugar. I had a new unopened packet of butter too so that was marked off the list.

Now it was just self raising flour and vanilla essence I was struggling with.

"I don't even know what I'm looking for." I groaned, moving various tinned produce out of the way in one of the cabinets on the wall. Green sighed until he was standing behind me, obviously double checking my search.

_Well, I knew what flour looked like, that was easy._

"Then let me help."

Huffing under my breath I watched as Green started to search through the cans, and tinned produce, until he pulled out a white bag. Smiling at me I figured he had found the flour. I didn't even know I bought that.

_Wow, was it that long since I had a clear out? _

I watched as Green gathered all the ingredients on the counter and sighed softly.

_Would it matter if we forgot the essence? Couldn't we use something else?_

As I shut the cupboard door and walked over to him his green eyes met mine for a moment.

"I guess you have jam, right?"

_Well, yeah I had that!_

I went to the fridge to retrieve the pot of seedless strawberry jam and handed it to the older male. I really was no use here, in fact I was more of a hindrance if anything. So I just watched Green, not daring to move an inch unless he told me to.

It was actually fascinating to watch him cook in the kitchen. He had pre heated the oven and had all the ingredients put into little bowls, so organised. If it was me then most of it would be all over the table by now. Then I watched as he put the sugar and butter into a bowl, and started to mix it all together.

_How did he even know what to do without following a recipe?_

My attention wavered for a moment when I heard my phone ringing in the living room.

_Who on Earth could be ringing me?_

Green looked over at me for a moment before nodding towards the living room.

"Don't you think you should answer that?"

Yeah, it was probably a good idea, it could be important. So, I left Green to his own devices in my kitchen, praying he wouldn't burn my apartment down to answer the ringing phone.

Once I picked the phone up a part of me wondered just who the hell it could be. That was soon uncovered.

"Hey Silver!"

The voice I recognised, but I could not put a face to it. So, I thought about where I had heard this voice from, and then it hit me like a rock in the face.

"Ruby how the hell did you get this number?!" I cried down the phone at the younger trainer. He chuckled softly, his Hoenn accent dancing in my ears..

"I just asked Blue for it. Anyway, sorry about before. Seems you caught me on a bad day."

Yeah, too right. I thought he was Gold and touched him, and then he went berserk at me.

_Upper class prick_.

I stifled a groan in my throat and instead decided to at least try to be civil.

"Tell me about it. So, why are you calling?"

"Ah! Funny you should ask that! Blue asked me to take some photos at the birthday party. I wanted to make sure you were okay with that before agreeing to it."

I blinked in shock.

_Photographs? Of me and Gold? Oh dear... _

Sighing softly I placed my hand to my head.

"Ruby...we don't need a photographer."

"Oh...well, she seemed pretty certain about it. I did offer to make some outfits for the party, but she didn't seem keen on the idea."

_And there was no way in hell I would ever wear ANYTHING Ruby made. One, it was just too gaudy and bright. Totally the opposite to me. And two, Ruby's fashion taste was like mixing chalk and cheese._

"Trust me. We will be fine." I assured the younger boy on the phone. He sighed.

"Well that is a shame. I was in the area today as well..."

"You're in Johto?" I asked, feeling my curiosity get the better of me. There was a brief pause.

"Yeah! I heard Green and Red were here and wanted to pay them a visit, but I haven't had much luck yet."

Well, Red was out with Gold, God knows where, and Green was in here with me. I didn't feel like sharing that information with him though.

"Sorry, I can't help you there." I lied.

"Oh well, never mind. So, when is the party?"

_Was he asking for an invite?_

I chewed my lip absent-mindedly, trying to remember the time when it was due to start.

_Didn't they say 7:00pm?_

As I cleared my throat I answered.

"I think it's tonight at 7:00pm."

"Awesome! Is it okay if I come too? Considering I am in the area and all..."

_Did he even know Gold?_

Sighing softly I combed my fingers through my hair, having visions of Ruby annoying the shit out of Green and Red all night. But, I suppose having one more guest there would be better.

"Knock yourself out."

"...what?" Ruby replied, his voice sounding confused.

"It's a figure of speech. It basically means, yeah go for it." I rolled my eyes.

"Oh! Yeah, I knew that!"

Sometimes I wondered if him and Gold shared brain cells in their spare time. I stole a glance towards my kitchen, hearing Green potter about. I wondered if he had done any more cooking whilst I was here.

"I have to go." I mused, hoping that the younger trainer would get the hint.

"Oh! Sorry! I understand. I'll see you tonight at the party!"

And quickly I hung up, tired of talking to people I didn't even like. I was going to give Blue a severe talking to.

_How dare she hand out my phone number without my permission! _

Placing my head in my hands I sighed softly. Having more people at this party might be either a good or bad decision, especially if Cyan was planning something. But what did I know? Nothing. In fact it could all be in my head, and just worrying over something that might not even happen would ultimately lead to my downfall. Man I needed to chill out.

* * *

After a few minutes of sitting in silence I managed to gain some strength to get up and walk back into the kitchen. Green was mixing something in a plastic bowl, his t-shirt now splattered with flour and he was concentrating so hard I wondered if the bowl would just float in mid air.

_Ha, psychic Green...that image is disturbing. _

I leaned against the counter, watching the taller male, who remained silent. Did he even notice I had returned? It was only when I cleared my throat did his attention waver and focus on me for a moment. He smiled softly;

"Oh hey, you're back."

"Yeah..." I mumbled, watching Green's ministrations. I would never have enough patience to bake anything, maybe burn it, that was definitely something I was capable of.

"Who was it?"

I sighed softly.

"It was Ruby..."

Green looked confused for a moment before looking back at the bowl in his hands.

"Why would Ruby be calling you?"

I shrugged, not really wanting to give details. Blue was going to get a serious talking to. How dare she give my phone number out to anyone who asked for it.

"He wanted to know if he could come to the party..."

Green almost fell over in shock as he tried to suppress a chuckle from escaping into the atmosphere. Of course he was aware of our last meeting, when Ruby was so rude to me, and then completely ignored me for Green.

_Well, didn't he say he was looking for him?_

"Are you going to let him?" Green asked, as he set the bowl on the counter. I nodded weakly. Well, it wasn't my birthday party. The older male's countenance changed to a look of uncertainty.

"Is that wise?"

"Why not? It's not like I can stop him." I groaned, looking up at Green. He looked thoughtful before smirking.

"I thought that kicking people out would be something you were good at, Silv."

Folding my arms I scowled at the spiky haired male, who flashed a cheeky smile at me.

_How dare he use my pet name! Gold always got told off or using it, so it won't be any different for him either!_

"Don't call me that!" I growled angrily. I could feel my cheeks burn when he started to chuckle softly. Just like Gold did.

_Why did no-one see that it was a problem for me? Silv was a girly name! I was not a girl!_

"Sorry...I never realised you'd get so prissy over it."

I could feel myself getting more annoyed as I stared at the older male, who now continued to mix the ingredients in the bowl, ready to bake.

_I was not prissy! _

"Shut up Green!" I barked angrily, now deciding I didn't want to stay in the same room as him any longer.

Clicking my tongue in annoyance I moved from the counter and walked back into the living, preparing myself to wallow in anger for about five minutes.

Before I had a chance to even sit down my arm was being held in a vice grip, causing me to spin around until I was literally face to face with the emerald eyed boy. His face was stern and his hands were strong on my arms.

"Silver...I thought you were over all the anger..."

His voice sounded pained for a moment, before I realised he was trying to guilt trip me into apologising for storming out.

_No chance!_

"You should never have called me that..." I mumbled, my eyes trailing down to his hands on my arms. His fingers were cold against my burning skin, which seemed to get hotter the longer he touched me. He smiled softly.

"It's only a nickname Silver, it's not like I insulted you or anything. It's a term of endearment."

He was right, but it wasn't just the nickname I despised it was everything linked to it. How my father used to call it me.

_ When I was twelve I watched my father and his cronies play a drinking game...and obviously I didn't want to feel left out. Stupidly I thought that if I joined in my dad wouldn't hate me any more, he would respect me, and stop hurting me. I was wrong._

"Silver...?" Green asked, pulling me out of my daze to meet a pair of sparkling emerald eyes. "Are you okay?"

Sighing to myself I wondered if I should tell Green why that name really got underneath my skin.

_Would he even begin to understand? _

"...Green..." I tried, feeling my voice fail me. How could I even begin to talk about this? It was hard enough to admit it to myself that it happened, let alone tell some-one about it. His hands lingered on my arms.

"Yes?"

Closing my eyes briefly I tried to gain some courage from somewhere. He wouldn't judge me, he would understand.

_Green wouldn't make this all a big joke and make me feel like shit would he?_

"It's...not you..."

"What?"

His voice sounded confused, and I knew I was just complicating everything right now. Why could I never get the words right? Swallowing hard I attempted to explain myself for the first time.

"...the nickname...I wasn't mad at you..."

"You seemed mad."

I looked up at him, seeing how his face had changed to a sombre expression, like he just wanted me to tell him what was really on my mind. But this was not the day to be dwelling on the past. Maybe getting it out in the open would help.

"My dad used to call me...Silv..." I admitted, feeling my body tremble as the images resurfaced.

"He did what?"

Green's hands remained strong as I literally just wanted to crumble to the ground.

_Every time, even now...my father always managed to make my skin crawl._

"It started a long time ago...my dad and his... friends were drinking together...and I felt left out. My dad and I...didn't get on so well. So I thought if I drank with them I could feel included...and we could have a normal father and son relationship..."

I swallowed hard as the memories re surfaced.

"...I was so wrong..."

Green's face seemed stern throughout what I had said, like he was listening so hard he could hear a pin drop. When I paused he edged me to continue with a wiggle of his eyebrows. I sighed once more.

"...they jeered at me, and bought lots of vodka shots. My dad said if I could keep up with them, then he might consider being a proper father to me. So...I did what they asked..."

I leaned into Green's embrace, so my head was resting against his chest. I inhaled his strong cologne and felt the warmth his body emitted. Maybe talking about this wasn't so bad after all.

"What happened after that?" Green asked softly. Sighing I tried to remove the horrible images that continued to reappear in my mind, cursing me with their abhorred faces.

"...after the third shot I was sick. I couldn't do it any more...and they laughed at me. They pointed at how pathetic I was and just laughed. And I remember my dad's voice...booming in my mind..._"Oh lads...look at him! He's not a man! He's a pathetic...girl. From now on...let's call him Silvia"._...and all I heard after that was my father's voice...going around in my head... _"Silvia...Silvia.._."

Green's body relaxed as he held me close, sighing softly. Re telling the tale of events really took it's toll on me as I exhaled deeply. I could feel my body convulsing slightly in his arms. It was the past, but it still felt like it happened only hours ago.

"...Your dad can't hurt you any more Silver...it's the past."

I looked up at the older male's kind face. He was smiling at me, and at that moment I felt my heart melt a little inside. Why was he so understanding? I didn't deserve to be understood, not after everything I had done.

_I was just as screwed up as he was...it was a never ending circle of pain._

But Green was right. It was the past. And my dad could never hurt me again. I wasn't that eight year old kid, lying crying in my bed any more. I was eighteen, I was strong. I could fight my own battles.

_He was the weak one...the one who ran away. No, I was not like him. I wasn't weak._

A part of me wished that mom intervened when I was little, but I guess I understood why she didn't.

_Maybe she didn't know, or was too scared to say anything?_

I wondered if she was still alive, and if I would ever see her again. Smirking to myself I shook my head into Green's chest.

_I think I have more chance of meeting Santa Claus than seeing her again..._

Green held me for a while until I had calmed down and found it physically possible to stand on my own two feet without assistance. He smiled at me, and it was a genuine one.

_Why was it that Green was always here?_

Red was actually lucky to have someone like Green looking out for him, always being there.

"Are you feeling better now?"

I nodded, feeling bashful for the first time in a while. It had been a long time since I had spoke to some-one about my past. It just felt weird to talk about it, but I did feel a lot better.

"Yeah...thanks."

"Don't mention it! Anyway, I better get cracking with this cake!"

I watched as he flashed me a brilliant smile before escaping back into the kitchen like nothing happened. I felt my cheeks burn significantly at the thought and tried to ignore it.

_Why did that just happen? It was only Green..._

But this wasn't the first time I blushed around him. Maybe my emotions were going out of control or something.

_Well...it wasn't really surprising._

Helping Green bake wasn't top of my priority list, so instead I just watched television for a while, wondering just how long he would be until it was ready. He had been in the kitchen for hours, and the party was due to start in less than three hours.

_Would it be ready in time? _

As a Pokemon battle had just ended on the television Green walked towards me, his clothes covered in flour and other food related messes and just smiled.

In his hands lay an absolutely perfect Victoria Sponge cake. Green had even managed to draw an Aipom and a Pichu in icing on the top for decoration, with the words. '_Happy Birthday Gold'_ written just above it.

Well at least this was ten times better than the old cake.

"Wow...this actually looks edible." I joked, hardly believing what I saw. At least Gold would be happy about having a cake that looked good. Green smiled, proud of his handy work. He wasn't kidding when he said he could bake.

"I said I had it covered."

And now that aspect was out of the way I breathed a sigh of relief, counting down the minutes till Green and I made our way to the party venue, ready for the main event.

* * *

Hours passed and eventually it came down to the time where Green and I were ready to leave. Considering it was Gold's birthday I had tried to make an effort. That consisted of wearing an ironed black silk shirt with dark denim jeans.

I even tried, emphasis on the word '_tried_', to do something with my hair.

At least I managed to calm it down a little and flatten it so it didn't look so unruly, but my complexion was still pasty white, completely clashing with my hair colour.

No matter what I did I still looked horrible, but I hoped that Gold wouldn't mind. Fashion and me in the same sentence did not mix.

Of course Green looked great, as usual. His hair was wilder than I ever thought it was possible. He too was wearing a shirt, which was a beautiful azure colour, accompanied by dark jeans. His cologne was as potent as usual, causing me to laugh violently every time he neared me. But that was just Green for you.

It was unfair that he took pride in his appearance and managed to pull it off, unlike me.

So once we were all set Green carried the cake, which was covered in a plastic tub, just because I had a tendency to drop things. Weavile and Aipom offered to house sit once again, which was nice of them.

I figured that a loud atmosphere like a party might not be a good idea for them. Weavile hated crowds anyway.

"Well...it's time." Green beckoned to me as he stood by the front door, holding the cake. I nodded, taking a deep breath.

_Gold's eighteenth birthday party was due to start in less than thirty minutes...and I was a nervous wreck._

I hoped to God the girls had managed to decorate the place properly.

We travelled to the venue by taxi, considering it would have took longer than thirty minutes to walk it down, and I didn't fancy it. The taxi ride was quiet and comfortable, the only sounds that emitted through the atmosphere was the soft humming of the engine, which was soothing.

I gazed out of the window, thinking.

_I hadn't seen Gold all day..__._

I wondered if he was okay. I knew he was with Red, but after everything that had happened I figured Red wouldn't be too great at fighting off psychopaths. Taking a deep breath I tried to steady my nerves. This was ridiculous.

_Why was I worrying over this?_

"Silver...relax..." Green's voice entered my ears, causing me to turn and face him. "Nothing bad is going to happen, I promise."

His voice was sincere and it made me smile weakly. Yeah, maybe he was right. My mind was just going into over drive that was all.

"...force of habit." I admitted.

"Trust me. If something does happen we have a plan sorted, so stop worrying. We all know what to do."

He lifted the hem of his shirt up to reveal the gun he brought. Well at least we had a back up plan because the one we had wasn't very good.

I smirked at the thought.

_Yeah, Gold playing dead. Because he totally wouldn't screw that up would he?_

I sighed softly, looking out of the window once again. If I just focused on the birthday instead of impending doom I might actually enjoy myself for once, if not at least for one night.

When the taxi pulled up outside the community hall huge dark blue banners covered the large windows. Bold white lettering spelling _'Eighteen today' _was covering the entire building, and beautiful gold and silver balloons were tied up in bunches at each corner. As I got out of the taxi I smiled softly.

_Okay...they did a good job. _

Green paid the fare and I watched as the black vehicle drove away, and the sound of music blaring soon took over my ears.

_Was it already starting?_

Green stood beside me and inhaled deeply.

"Well...this looks great!" He mused.

I nodded, silently pleased with their work. Although I had a feeling Crystal would enquire about the cake. Well, if she had done it right in the first place then a new cake didn't need to be made.

"Yeah...let's go inside."

The taller male lead the way up to the large oak doors, whilst I just looked around aimlessly. This place was quite isolated in the large port town of Olivine. The community hall had large glass windows, allowing lots of natural light into it's room. It seemed this area was hardly used by tourists which pleased me.

A private affair suited me just fine.

* * *

"SILVER!" A voice cried as we walked inside, only my eyesight soon became blurry as something collided with my face.

It took a few seconds to realise that it was Blue, and she was hugging me to death. I smiled, feeling a tightness around my throat as the taller girl squeezed. Eventually she let go, admiring my attire, and my attempt at hair styling.

She smiled happily.

"You look wonderful!"

"...pull the other one." I groaned, rolling my eyes.

Blue wore a beautiful pink summer dress which reached just above her knees and her hair was immaculate. She clicked her tongue in annoyance as the loud music started to sink into my brain cells.

_Just what the hell was playing?_

"You do!" She declared loudly.

Okay, maybe arguing with her wasn't a good idea. So I just nodded meekly, scanning the room for people I knew. It was packed, and I mean with people who I had never seen before. Did Gold know all these people?

My paranoia really started to act up when foreign eyes burned into me, as strangers sipped their cocktail drinks in disgust.

"Crystal decided to be DJ..." Blue giggled, indicating with her arm to a raised platform, where she stood with some headphones on, pretending to enjoy the music that was hurting my ear drums.

_What the fuck was this? Funky house? Whatever it was, it was pure shit._

"I can see that!" I cried over the loud music, that seemed to get louder as time progressed. I had also realised that Green had been swallowed up by the crowd and I had no clue where he went.

Hopefully he was still alive.

"Gold is over there!" Blue shouted, pointing to the far end of the brightly coloured hall.

There I saw him, standing against the wall, talking to some-one. Balloons and banners hung on the walls behind him and he seemed happy, which was good. And he actually made an effort. He wore a pink shirt, which suited him with blue jeans that seemed too tight around his legs.

"Okay! I'll go and say hello!"

Moving away from the safety of Blue I decided to risk my life through the crowd. Occasionally I would get elbowed in the ribs or shoved around but, eventually I reached the wall, meeting Gold's gaze. He smiled at me when he saw me.

"Silver!"

It was now I noticed Red was with him, dressed in a similar attire. So that was why they went out, to get suited and booted for the occasion. He smiled faintly at me before taking a sip from his drink.

"You look...great!" Gold enthused happily, walking towards me to give me a hug. I embraced the dark haired boy tightly, inhaling deeply.

"You do too."

The music blared in my ears as Gold and I just hugged for a while, enjoying each other's company. I closed my eyes, trying to block it all out, and only to envision that it was only me and him in the room, no one else.

_No noise...no people...no interruptions. Just us._

"Hey Gold!" A brash voice entered my ears which immediately made my body tense up.

_I knew that accent... _

As we pulled away I turned to face the direction and noticed it was Ruby. He was smiling wildly. It seemed he forgot it was a party and so dressed like he would normally, even with the stupid hat.

"Ruby?! What the hell are you doing here?" Gold cried, before smiling. They smacked fists together before Ruby grinned once again.

"Silver invited me!"

I frowned, wishing I hadn't. He was such a stuck up prick, I didn't need this shit.

"Well...that was nice of him." Gold joined in, giving me a concerned look. Red stayed mute, as usual, enjoying his drink. Meanwhile I was trying to stay calm.

Ruby's accent was driving me up the wall!

"This party is great!" He enthused, looking around at all the people dancing around him. I sighed, folding my arms. This party was not my idea of fun.

_ Having strangers bump and barge into me? Staring at me like I was dirt on the bottom of their shoes? No thanks._

"Yeah! It's great to see you again!" Gold beamed happily, smiling like an idiot as usual. Now my eyes started to search for some-one else to mingle with, obviously Gold and Ruby were far too enthralled in each other to notice me.

Sighing softly I stole a glance at Red, who seemed to be just staring at the same spot. Was he day dreaming? It was only when I looked to where he was staring that I realised he was actually staring at some-one. And that some-one was Green.

"Man! You have changed so much man! Totally rocking your outfit!" Ruby cried, and at that moment I walked towards where Green was.

He was standing opposite us, against a wall, still holding that cake. Was he protecting it with his life or something? So I risked my life for a second time through the crowd, feeling people elbow me, and push me around until I reached the safety of the wall.

The music blared into my ears, causing me to wince.

_Couldn't some-one change this play list?!_

My eyes caught Green's as he flashed me an apologetic smile. I wondered if it was because of the crowd? My eyes focused on the plastic tub in his hands and couldn't help but sigh.

"You're still carrying that?"

"I don't know where to put it." The older male replied, his eyes scanning the room uneasily.

That was true. Wherever he put it there was a risk of it being trodden on, or knocked onto the floor. I wasn't familiar with the layout of this community hall but I reckoned there had to be other rooms.

"Shall we look for somewhere safe then?" I asked, anything to stop hearing this awful music. Green nodded slightly. Aimlessly I looked around, wondering where we could go.

But before we had any chance to move the music cut out, and a horrible screeching sound from the microphone deafened me.

"Hello everyone!"

It was Crystal, and everyone in the room stopped doing what they were doing and stared at the blue haired girl. What was she playing at?

"Thank you all for coming! And now...I think it's time we wished Gold a happy birthday!"

The crowd cheered, and quickly I tried to find Gold amongst the crowd, but I couldn't pinpoint his location. I huffed in annoyance as the cheery song started. The whole crowd sang along.

"Happy birthday to you~! Happy birthday to you~! Happy birthday to _Gold_~! Happy birthday to you~!"

The crowd cheered and whistled and clapped in admiration. I couldn't help but smile along with them. This truly was a happy day, for everyone.

* * *

A loud crashing sound murdered my ear drums and instinctively I knelt down, using my arms to protect my head. Screams and shouts were the next thing I heard as broken glass rained down onto my body. I closed my eyes, not daring to open them.

Wails and cries hurt my ears as I tried to understand just what the hell was going on. What made that crashing sound?

Once the glass shower seemed to have ended I moved my arms, daring to peek out at the damage. Somehow a large dumping truck had driven right through one of the glass windows, causing it to shatter. It had also damaged a segment of the roof, and parts of it were falling down.

Dust billowed in the air causing me to cough violently. Screams and cries were still heard by people and I wondered if anyone was hurt.

I shakily stood up, trying to get a better view of the person behind the wheel. Their face was hidden behind a veil of long dark tangled hair, and blood was smeared on the windscreen. I figured whoever it was wouldn't be getting up any time soon.

Aimlessly I glanced around until I spotted Blue in one of the corners, cowering in fear. Her pink dress was covered in dust and blood splatters from the people who were injured close by.

"Blue!"

Immediately her eyes met mine, clouded with tears. Her face flushed with relief as she got to her feet shakily and rushed towards me.

"Silver!" She cried as she collided with me, hugging me as hard as she could.

Her body convulsed as she allowed tears to now escape her eyes. Sighing to myself I didn't know what else to do but hold her.

"Silver...what happened?"

I shook my head desperately, not knowing myself.

_Was it an accident? But who the hell would be driving a dump truck at that speed around a port town?_

"Blue...is everyone else alright?" I asked, moving from the embrace to place my hands on her shoulder's, which trembled underneath my touch. She looked unsure, and her face was pained.

_No...did some-one get hurt?_

Once again I tried to find the others.

_Wasn't Green by my side when it all happened? Where did he go?_

"SILVER~!" Blue screamed, pointing to a portion of the roof, which as soon as I laid eyes on it fell just in front of us with a crash, billowing a dust cloud around the room.

We both coughed violently trying to see through the haze, but it was impossible. This whole building could cave in, if we were not careful.

"You have to get out of here!" I told her sternly, watching as her bottom lip quivered a little in sadness. The brunette shook her head weakly before I glared at her.

_I wished she wouldn't act so stubborn! She was in danger!_

"No...I can't you leave...I..."

"It wasn't a request Blue, it was an order."

She blinked at me, allowing tears to fall down her cheeks, which were sprinkled with dust. Then she nodded. That was a relief. She glanced at me a final time before rushing out of the door, which amazingly was still okay and not harmed.

Taking a deep breath I tried to get some courage from somewhere. I needed to find the others!

I scrambled over the pile of debris, desperately searching for faces I recognised, screams that I knew of. But I saw nothing. My clothes were covered in dust and dirt, and the skin on my hands was starting to blister and split. Blood seeped out of the cuts on my fingers but I continued.

_What if Gold was under this rubble?_

"SILVER!"

Instantly I shot up, recognising that voice. It was Red! He was knelt beside something, waving with his hand for me to walk over. In haste I made my way over to another pile of debris, where the roof had collapsed.

Red seemed fine, apart from having dust all over him, and a few cuts and bruises.

"Silver, it's Crystal!"

I knelt down to where he was pointing. Crystal lay motionless, with her legs trapped underneath one of the beams from the roof. It looked painful to move her.

We needed assistance and urgently!

"Red call for the fire brigade!" I bellowed to the champion, who nodded quickly. He fished into his pockets for his phone whilst I tried to get to Crystal. Her eyes were closed, but she was still breathing.

Then I gazed down at her trapped legs. Blood was seeping onto the ground from where they had cut into her and I wondered if she would make it.

_Oh no...this...this was worse than I ever thought! _

Red placed a hand on my shoulder to steady my wavering emotions as he placed the phone to his ear.

"Hello? Fire brigade please..."

I tuned out of his voice as I watched Crystal, lying on the cold hard ground, trapped.

_Why couldn't I help her?!_

"Crystal? Stay with us! The fire brigade are on their way." I assured her, not even knowing if she could even hear me. My heart was pounding in my chest as realisation started to sink in.

_The birthday card...the three, or four presents...was this...Cyan? I had to find GOLD!_

"Red stay with Crystal, I have to find Gold!"

He nodded as I stood up, feeling my legs wobble underneath my weight.

_No...Gold...he had to be okay! He had to be!_

Quickly I looked around, hoping to see his goofy smile somewhere. But I didn't. I saw a bunch of people I didn't know scrambling about, trying to get out of the hall, but no Gold.

"Shit...shit... shit..." I cursed to myself, pacing around the hall, that was covered in debris. I ran my fingers through my hair uneasily. Where could he be?

"S-Silv-er..." I heard a weak voice enter my ears.

Quickly I looked to where I heard the voice to see it was Green. He was lying underneath some rubble that had fallen on top of him. Promptly I scrambled towards him, trying to remove the debris.

He smiled faintly, coughing violently as time after time I shoved pieces of brick and glass out of the way, not caring if I got cut along the way.

"Don't worry Green, I'll get you out."

My heart thundered in my chest as I looked at my hands. They were covered in blood, and I knew it was not mine. Glancing back down at the ground I noticed it was Green's. A shard of glass had pierced his stomach, and he was bleeding pretty badly. But he still smiled at me.

"Silv-er..."

"No...don't talk." I shushed, panicking.

_What was I supposed to do?! Oh fuck...oh shit!_

Running my fingers through my hair I watched as his eyes closed briefly and opened once again. His breathing was raspy and drawn out, like it was a difficult task for him to do.

"Don't worry... we will get you out of here!" I assured him, watching as he smiled weakly. It was a smile of disbelief, and I hated it!

_Have faith Green! Please! Fucking hell don't die you bastard!_

I glanced across at Red, wondering if I should call him to be by his lover's side. But he already looked upset...I didn't want to destroy him.

So I didn't.

"I have to find Gold..." I murmured weakly, feeling tears sting my eyes at the thought of him being dead.

_What if...he was...?_

My hands trembled as I dug them into the debris, not caring about the sensation on my flesh. I needed to make sure he was safe.

"Find...Gold..." Green issued weakly to me, causing me to look at him.

He nodded, like it was the right thing to do. But I couldn't just leave him here. He smiled at me, and I swear to God it was heartbreaking to witness. A part of me wondered if it was the last time I would ever see his smile again.

"Go..." He murmured weakly.

I nodded in response and stood up, feeling just how shaky my legs had become. I had to find Gold.

_He just had to be okay! But where would I start_?

The whole room was a shambles, and what if he was underneath the debris? Panic flooded every inch of my body as I stepped over broken shards of glass and brick, that smothered the once pristine tiled floor.

Then I wondered if there were other rooms in this community hall.

_There had to be, right? Like toilets, or a cleaning cupboard. But...why would Gold be there?_

He was in this room when the roof decided to cave in. I glanced up at the ruined ceiling, allowing my mind to short circuit with thoughts, thoughts I didn't want to even consider.

Fusing my eyes shut I decided that standing around contemplating the maybe's and what if's were doing no good for my sanity so, I had to look for him. Over the noise of crying and wails I decided that getting out of this room might be beneficial, after all, Gold could have left the room.

* * *

I managed to find the door, through the mountains of broken glass, and beams from the roof, and wondered down the narrow hallway. It was silent, deathly silent. But it wouldn't be for long.

It was probable some-one had called for an ambulance, even the police. And sirens blaring in my ears was something that I didn't want right now.

Grunting to myself I stopped outside an old worn out looking door. On appearance it seemed like it hadn't been used for years.

_What was this? A cleaning cupboard? _

Sighing to myself I decided to try to steady my nerves, and pushed the door. It creaked open painfully, causing me to wince. As my eyes scanned the room it was indeed a cleaning cupboard, only it seemed rather large.

Aimlessly I searched along the wall for a light switch, and sadly my search was failing miserably. So, without light to guide me I stepped into the dark void, that was the room and tried my best to navigate.

The room had a damp smell, like old dusty books, and water logged wall paper.

I cursed as I bumped into something solid in front of me, and then a long string tickled my forehead.

Instinctively I grabbed it and pulled, only to allow the room to become illuminated in light.

The sound of a door being locked entered my ears, closely followed by my own heart beat, pumping faster and faster in my chest. My eyes met a pair of narrowed azure ones, then trailed down to a wicked smile that wreaked havoc with my insides, then realisation hit me in the face.

"What a pleasant surprise this is." That voice sent a violent shiver down my body, as instinctively I tried to back away. But I couldn't.

The room seemed so much smaller now, like the walls were closing in on me.

_And that look in his eyes...I saw that look before. When I was eight..._

"No..." I mumbled, feeling my body convulse as those dark eyes burned into my very soul, and a heartbreaking cackle filled the air.

_Cyan couldn't be here...he...no!_

"Oh yes. I just popped by to see how you were enjoying the party." He smirked, leaning against the wall, eyes never leaving mine. I felt my hands clench into fists protectively.

_Had he already got to Gold?_

"...you...bastard!" I cried in anger. He shook his head and tutted in annoyance.

"No need for such vulgar language Silver. I was only visiting. Besides... I heard it went _CRASHINGLY_ well."

He laughed darkly, and my skin exploded into goosebumps. _He did this...he was the cause of this?!_ I bit my lip harshly as he stared at me, without a care in the worl_d. _

_But...he wasn't driving the truck..._

"...how could you do that?!"

"Quite easily." He returned coyly. "In fact, I didn't even have to do anything. As you know, I wasn't the one behind the wheel."

He had a point, so who was it?

_Was Crystal right all along? Did he have outside help?_

I felt myself backing away as he neared me, that wicked smile never leaving his face.

"Then... who..." I tried, feeling my voice fail on me as he got closer. My whole body tensed as he paused inches away from me.

"...Violet."

My eyes widened.

_What? That... wasn't possible! She...was good! She would never side with the enemy! She helped me! She called for an ambulance when I got hurt! Wait..._

Cyan smiled at me, and I tried reading his expression. He was toying with me, screwing with my head.

"That...can't be.."

"Oh I assure you, it is. Bless her soul, after she hit you over the head in the alleyway she just had to call for an ambulance. She was never truly cut out for being my sidekick..."

He laughed, and I swear it chilled my very soul. He knew that she could die if she drove that truck. And now, she was dead and he didn't even seem bothered.

"...You knew...you knew if she drove that truck she would die!"

"Oh...details!"

He waved me off, smirking.

_Did he really have no heart? Did I create this...monster?! _

Then a thought hit me.

_What about Gold? Did he think he was dead? _

I swallowed hard, thinking of various scenarios. What was I supposed to say now?

"Oh...did Gold like his birthday card?" Cyan added in, looking at me curiously.

_Was he having me on here?!_

I frowned at his remark and folded my arms, trying to distance myself between him.

"Why did you send it?"

"Because I am so generous!" He exclaimed. "I even got him four birthday presents!"

He neared me once again, and I felt my back hit against the wall. There was no escape, nowhere to run. I was stuck between Cyan and the wall.

_Great..._

"What presents?!" I cried, trying to fight off the fear that was starting to seep into my bones. He smirked.

"Let me list them for you..." He started to count on his fingers. "Number one...his best friend will be crippled for the rest of her life."

My eyes widened as thoughts of Crystal returned.

_No...crippled?! This was...no he had to be lying!_

"Number two..." He continued. "...two of his friends are dead."

I blinked, trying to fight off the urge to cry.

_Dead? Who was dead? Then it hit me. Oh no...not him...not...Green!_

"Number three..." Cyan continued, his voice hurting my ears. "...his other friends will never recover from this...incident..."

I felt my body tremble violently as I looked at the floor.

_ No...this...wasn't happening! This was...a nightmare!_

"And finally..." I froze as I felt Cyan near me, his breath was hot on my face as I flinched involuntarily. "...your precious Gold..is dead!"

It felt like my heart had literally just exploded in my chest, and death was coming to take me away from this cruel world. My ears rang with those words.

_Gold...is dead..._

Tears stung my eyes as fear crept it's way into my heart.

_Was he...being serious. Was Gold really... _

I closed my eyes tightly, feeling every heartbeat wreak havoc within me, causing me to feel a pain that was excruciating.

"I'd say...we are finally even, wouldn't you?"

I glared at him, and watched as he smiled. Then a switch flicked in my mind and the only thing I saw was a horrible red mist.

Growling like a feral cat I lunged at him, knocking him to the floor. My hands reached and gripped his throat tightly. With all the power I had I squeezed his throat, watching as he coughed and struggled underneath me. But that smile remained.

His hands reached up to hold my arms, and surprisingly he was strong, stronger than I remembered. I pushed down with all my weight, only to be thrown backwards against the wall.

I hissed as pain shot up my spine, and I closed my eyes.

_This bastard wouldn't give up would he?! _

"That...wasn't a wise move" He said threateningly, adjusting his t-shirt and rubbing his neck, where I strangled him. My eyes watched him like a hawk as I sat against the wall.

_If he dared come near me..._

"Get the hell away from me!" I screamed, feeling tears escape my eyes. Cyan shook his head slowly, until he was literally inches away from me.

"We are not...quite even after all..."

_What the hell was he talking about? He finally had his revenge, wasn't that enough?_

Then that look returned, the power hungry look. I shuddered when memories returned, memories that refused to die. His fingers gripped my chin harshly, forcing me to look at him. And my heart died a little more inside.

"...I'd say you owe me...big time!"

He smirked at me until his face was literally inches away. Instinctively I closed my eyes, praying for this to go away. I just wanted it all to go away. His fingers on my skin made me feel sick, like he was poisoning me.

"Get...the hell off me!"

His other hand grabbed my wrist, forcing it against the wall, stopping me from moving, as clouded azure eyes drunk in this image of me. He smiled softly.

"...I'm not finished with you yet."

_No..._

The memories stung me like a Beedrill as images of my father haunted my mind.

_Images of him saying the same thing to me after he abused me, after he made me feel worthless...cheap...dirty..._

My eyes widened in realisation, and by look on his face I figured that was his intention.

"No...no..." I mumbled, shaking my head, trying to get him off me. His grip was strong, stronger than I remembered.

"Shhh~" He cooed, placing a finger to my lips, which trembled. "...fighting it will only hurt you more."

_Hurt me more?! What the fuck was he planning to do to me?! _

I tried to remain strong, to show him I wasn't afraid. Until he smiled at me, and my defence came crumbling down.

I struggled against him, only to find my wrists were compromised and I couldn't move them. Cyan pushed against me until I was lying flat on the floor, his body weight keeping me from moving.

I shook my head desperately, feeling tears fall down my face. I didn't want look at him any more, I didn't want to feel this any more.

Closing my eyes I tried to block everything out. The poisonous touches on my skin, the toxicity behind his kisses, the evil undertone to his voice. But I couldn't.

"Get...off me!" I cried, feeling his lips attach themselves to my neck, suckling the skin hard.

_This was wrong! I didn't want this!_

I hissed at the feeling, wishing that somehow I could get this creep off me. Sadly there was no sharp objects around.

His arm stopped me from moving, as the other hand started to squeeze my flaccid organ in my trousers. Squeezing my eyes shut I tried to block it out.

_I didn't want to feel this! This...wasn't happening!_

"STOP IT!" I yelled desperately, feeling my chest tighten with every breathe. Cyan smiled at me, squeezing harder which caused me to yelp like a Growlithe that had been kicked by it's trainer.

"I would..." He mused, before dark emotionless eyes gazed at me. "...but I just can't stop myself."

Fear consumed me almost immediately as I flailed around, wishing that I could control my own body.

_I didn't want to enjoy his ministrations! This was wrong! I didn't like this! _

His body weight kept me on the ground, making moving harder. I was stuck, and I couldn't do anything about it.

"Stop doing this!"

Closing my eyes tightly I felt tears well up, longing to be freed as he continued to grope me unmercifully.

_Why...? He had his revenge...why...?_

Then I felt my black silk shirt riding up my torso slowly.

_It was him...he was doing this!_

"GET THE HELL OFF ME!" I shrieked loudly.

"That is not going to happen..." He assured me, his voice laced with an evil undertone that made me shiver. I hated myself right now, I hated how he was making my organ erect in my pants.

_I DIDN'T LIKE THIS! WHY WAS IT BEHAVING THAT WAY!_

Then his breath was hot by my ear as I tensed immediately, praying, wishing for something to happen.

_I wanted some-one to help me...anyone!_

"I want you...all for myself."

My heart thundered in my chest as I felt his nimble fingers undo the button on my trousers, and slowly they were being pulled down my legs. I kicked out in anger, hoping to cause some damage. But it was hopeless. Cyan used his body weight against me once again, stopping me from moving. I fused my eyes shut, biting into my lip desperately.

_Please...some-one...help!_

"No...NO!" I cried.

"...and I will have you..."

"NOOOO! I WON'T LET YOU!"

* * *

Then the sound of a loud bang rung in my ears causing my whole body to tense up. Keeping my eyes closed I noticed Cyan's body had become stiff against mine, until he went limp and lifeless, collapsing to the ground.

Shakily I opened my eyes, drinking in the image of the embodiment of evil lying on the ground, not moving. Blood was seeping through his shirt, causing the garment to darken.

_What happened?_

I struggled to sit up, kicking his body further away from me as still he did not move. Quickly I adjusted my clothes, thankful for whatever had intervened.

But as my eyes looked up towards the door I saw some-one I never expected to see. He held Green's gun, pointing it at Cyan, and he trembled with fear as realisation hit him with what he had just done.

_He shot Cyan..._

My heart continued to beat faster in my chest as relief washed over me.

Broken golden eyes stared at the corpse of the enemy, until they met mine. Then they became over come with tears, that flooded his face, darkening his skin. His clothes were ripped and torn, and bruises covered his honey blemished skin from the incident that happened earlier.

My whole body trembled as I witnessed the gun shot wound in Cyan's back, causing more blood to escape onto the ground.

_He was...dead at last._

"G-Gold..?" I struggled to say, feeling my voice fail on me.

His whole body convulsed against the door frame as he dropped the gun to the floor.

"...is he...is...he..." He tried, sniffing back the tears that refused to stop.

I glanced at Cyan, who was still devoid of life. I reckoned he was dead, considering the damage the bullet had inflicted on him. Shakily I rose to my feet, my eyes meeting Gold's. He was breaking down, I could see it.

_But...he was alive._

"Yes," I answered, watching as he panicked.

"I...killed him." He murmured, completely in shock with what he just did.

And even though he had murdered him I felt completely at ease now my nemesis was gone for good, and that Gold was still alive.

_Now... the only problem that was swimming in my mind was...how was I supposed to get out of this situation now?_

* * *

**_Author's Note: GO ON GOLD YOU BEAUTY! Thank Goodness! Some-one needed to do that right? But what happens next? Will Gold get into trouble? What has Silver got planned? Find out in the next chapter! :D Please read and review! It makes a girl very happy face! ^^_**


	23. Unconditional

**Author's Note: Ah :'( The end is in sight. Only one more chapter to go! This is kinda short, but have tissues handy! Enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter Twenty Three: Unconditional**

Gold's body convulsed in utter shock against the door frame, fighting tears that longed to be released. I think he had only just realised that he had shot Cyan, and successfully killed him. Obviously there would be consequences to such actions, which he must not have thought about.

I glanced at the corpse of my nemesis, motionless on the floor. At least his devil days were over.

"...Silver..." Gold croaked out weakly, tears flooding his face as he looked at me. It was breaking my heart to see him so pained. He did a good thing, yet obviously not everyone would see it that way.

"Just calm down..." I murmured, walking towards him to place my hands on his shoulder's. He tensed immediately, his whole body shaking against my touch.

"...I just...he was trying to...I couldn't...I had to..."

"Shhh~" I cooed softly, wiping tears away from his face as broken amber eyes stared into my own.

"You didn't do anything..."

He shook his head desperately, disagreeing with me.

"I...killed him!"

Then my ears detected the sounds of sirens, police sirens at that. This wasn't good. If they came in here and saw Cyan's body, and discovered Gold killed him he would definitely go to prison. Chewing my lip I had to think of something to give us some more time.

And then it clicked.

I reached down to pick up the gun and inspected it. It was fully loaded, just like Green had assured me. Gold's whimpers and cries still entered my ears.

"He...was going to...hurt you...I...I...just shot him and...oh God..." Gold cried out helplessly, and instead of saying anything I pointed the gun at the wall and shot again, hearing the sound resonate off the walls. Gold leapt up in shock, golden eyes wide in terror.

"What...are you doing?!"

I threw the gun back on the floor, glancing briefly at the shot in the wall.

"Giving us some time..."

The dark haired boy sat down on the floor, his back against the door.

"...for what?"

"To think of some sort of alibi..." I murmured, kneeling down to his level. Once again he shook his head desperately, refusing my help. He closed his eyes, allowing tears to trickle down his face.

"No...I need to take responsibility for this...I...killed him!"

Then a thought hit me. There was no way I was going to let Gold go to prison for this, not if I could help it. And as I looked at his pained expression I couldn't help but say;

"You didn't do anything..."

"I did! I shot him!"

"No...you didn't...I did."

His eyes flashed open, sparkling with tears as his lip quivered in sadness. His face portrayed just how confused he was. But this was the only way.

"W-what...?" He struggled to say, his voice croaking a little. I took a deep breath, trying to steady my nerves.

_Wasn't this what Cyan spoke of before? Taking the bullet?_

"I...shot him,"

"But...I did! He was trying to-"

"No Gold!" I said sternly, holding his hands in mine gently. His eyes met mine once again, before trailing to the floor in sadness.

"The story is...I shot him, you had nothing to do with this!"

I watched as he shook his head desperately, refusing to accept this alibi. I sighed heavily and stood up, combing my fingers through my hair. At least by shooting a second time the Police would assume there were hostages and not just burst in here.

"Silver..." Gold murmured, causing me to look at him. "I am not that ten year old boy any more...who cried when things got tough. I am all grown up now...I can look after myself..."

"No..." I muttered, shaking my head. There was no way he was going to get blamed for this. I had to protect him, and I promised that I would.

"Do you...know what unconditional love is?" I asked him, watching as sparkling golden eyes blinked in confusion, before he shook his head.

"It's...when you would take the bullet in place of some-one you love, die for them. And that is what I am doing. I am taking that bullet...for you..."

More tears cascaded down his face as my heart rate increased ten fold inside my chest. It just seemed that it would literally burst through my ribcage eventually.

"...you can't...protect me from this..."

"Yes I can!" I cried in anger, once again combing my fingers through my hair, pacing around the room. Thinking, of things that would make this whole mess right again. But nothing surfaced. Gold's whole body slumped against the door.

"Silver..."

"I will not let you go to prison for this!" I said determinedly. Of course Gold didn't want me to go to prison either, but he had no choice. I made a promise to myself that Cyan would not hurt him, or ruin his life. So I had to take the blame, it was more believable anyway.

Gold looked up at me, smiling weakly as the tears continued to fall down his face, breaking my heart slowly, painfully. Even though he did the right thing he would still get punished. That wasn't going to happen.

"Did everyone else get out of the hall?" I asked, trying to change the subject. Gold's expression changed from sorrowful to anguish in a matters of seconds, as his body started to convulse once again.

"Not...everyone..."

So Cyan was right, people were hurt.

_Were two of his friends really dead? And what about Crystal?_

It seemed that he read my mind because he answered all my questions.

"...Crystal...her legs were crushed...they reckon...she won't walk again..."

My whole body froze like I was encased in Ice Beam.

_So she was crippled? Wouldn't walk again? Oh my God..._

"...the others?" I choked out. I knew Red and Blue were alive and well, if not a little shaken up, but I didn't know about anyone else. I wanted answers. Gold's head bowed lower in sorrow as he sighed heavily.

"...Ruby and Green...they...they..."

And just like that he crumbled down in front of me, burying his head in his hands as he cried. My heart echoed pain throughout my body with every cursed beat as realisation started to seep into every crevice of my being.

_They were...dead..._

"This is all my fault!" I cried, feeling panic wash over me for a moment. Red must have been devastated. The one person he loved most in this world was gone, and there was nothing he could do to bring him back.

_It was all my fault..._

"No...you weren't driving the truck." Gold defended me. I shook my head.

"I might as well have been! None of this would have happened if I had just kept my mouth shut!"

I gripped my head tightly, thinking about all those times when my life had started to tumble downhill into a pit of never ending despair.

_If only I had let his brother win that battle..._

"Stop blaming yourself..."

Unable to keep still I decided to sit down beside Gold, my eyes scanning the ceiling in thought.

_What had I done...?_

"How can I not?"

"You told me once that you never apologise for being you, so don't start doing it now."

I looked at him, seeing a weak expression of determination through his crumbling facade, and I knew he was right. I never apologised for any of my actions, but this was different. I had caused hurt, pain and suffering, even death because of what I did. Blaming myself was okay this time.

The sound of sirens returned and it sounded like they were just outside the hall, but no-one seemed to be coming in, which was a relief. We needed more time to get our stories straight if they were going to question Gold about the event.

"Okay...our story is...you came in because you heard shouting and then a loud bang. When you came in Cyan was already dead, okay?"

Gold's face expressed indignation, but it seemed he understood.

"But...what if they check the gun? They will find my fingerprints."

"I used the gun to shoot at the wall, mine are on there too."

I did that for a reason, to bide us time and to put evidence on the gun. If Gold spoke against me then they wouldn't suspect him, and besides...it wasn't the first time I got into trouble with the law.

"Silver..." Gold murmured weakly, eyes gazing into my own.

"That is the story, okay?"

He weakly nodded, obviously not happy with lying to the Police, but he had no choice. I wasn't going to let him take the blame for any of this. I glanced at the wall, seeing the bullet embedded in the wallpaper and sighed.

_Was this really how it was going to end?_

"But...you'll go to prison!" Gold cried, sniffling back his tears. With a heavy sigh I shrugged. That was a small price to pay.

"I know..."

"I don't...want you to...leave me..."

He rested his head on my shoulder and I watched as with every breath his whole body trembled slightly, like a candle in the wind. He was really struggling to keep composed, and once again it was my fault. I smiled softly;

"This is the only way..."

I glanced at him as golden eyes shimmered with tears. He forced a lopsided smile at me.

"I wish...I could have been a better boyfriend to you..."

In disbelief I shook my head, smiling to myself.

_How could he even say that? None of this was his fault._

"Don't talk like that." I said sternly, feeling his arms wrap around my waist desperately.

"...I should have been there for you...I should have known that Cyan..."

"It wasn't your fault," I assured him. None of what happened was connected to him. He wasn't to know that Cyan planned any of this.

"I can't...ever forgive myself," I rolled my eyes, holding the dark haired boy against me.

"Stop blaming yourself. You did what you could. I don't hate you, and most of this happened because of me, so stop beating yourself up about it."

Once again he forced a smile at me. As my eyes diverted to the ceiling I could vaguely hear Officer Jenny outside demanding that I come out of the hall with my hands above my head. Right now, I wasn't going anywhere. These moments would probably be my last with Gold, and I didn't want them cut short.

I sighed heavily as I reached out and picked up the gun. As my eyes inspected the weapon Gold's weak voice entered my ears once again.

"What's going to happen now?" I shrugged, deciding to take the bullets out of the gun. Gold wasn't watching what I was doing and was too preoccupied by staring at the same spot on the wall.

_This gave me some time..._

"I admit that it was me who shot Cyan...and you get to move on with your life."

His head bowed lower as the words processed. He would be able to move on and live a normal life. Crystal would need him, especially since she was crippled for the rest of her life. She would rely on him more than ever.

"...I can't..." He murmured weakly, as I took the last bullet out of the gun and hid them underneath the edge of the carpet.

"You don't have a choice."

His eyes refocused on mine, and for that split second I could see my world crashing down in his eyes, watching it all burn to the ground.

"You do! I could tell them it was me,"

"Not going to happen..."

He sighed, slamming the back of his head against the wall in annoyance. We had already decided this, we were just going over old ground now. And once again Officer Jenny's voice was heard vaguely, reminding me that I didn't have long left to hand myself over to the police.

_Time... was of the essence, and right now I didn't have enough of it left._

"...Silver..." Gold murmured, eyes sparkling in sadness.

"Crystal will need you to look after her, Red too."

He shook his head as once again fresh tears fell down his honey coloured cheeks. And I could feel my heart breaking more and more inside.

"But...I need you..."

And that was it. He just broke down. His whole body collapsed into my arms as he cried out in pain, hands covering his face desperately trying to fight the sadness that had burrowed deep into his heart. I frowned sadly, hating the fact that even now I was slowly tearing his world apart.

"...I know..." I murmured, holding him tightly, frightened to let go. These moments would be the ones he would remember forever, so they needed to be good.

"Please...I don't want you to go..."

Blinking furiously I tried to hold back tears that were threatening to fall from my eyes, as my feelings just ran havoc inside me, pulsating a pain like no other.

_I wanted it to stop..._

"...Gold..."

"Stay with me..." He pleaded, his hands desperately clutching at my shirt, wishing that if he clung hard enough I wouldn't be able to leave. And I didn't want to go, but I had to. He needed to be able to live a normal life, with or without me.

_And I would do that...for him._

"I won't ask again! Come out with your hands behind your head!" Officer Jenny's voice boomed louder so I reckoned she was using a megaphone. Sighing heavily I tried to prise Gold away from me, giving me enough time to stare into broken golden eyes. They shimmered like fresh spring dew on a leaf.

"...No..."

"I have to go..." I murmured quietly, picking the gun up and placing it in my pocket. He shook his head wildly.

"It's...too soon!"

"It will always be too soon..."

Instinctively I placed my hands either side of his face, watching as his eyes closed in pain, refusing to even look at me. Taking a deep breath I assured him of something.

"But...don't ever forget that...I love you..okay?"

His head nodded weakly, more tears cascading down his cheeks. Wiping them away with my thumbs I decided that it was now or never and stood up. I gave a final glance to Cyan, pleased that he was dead but scared for my life right now.

"I...love you too..." Gold uttered weakly, his whole body shuddering against the wall. I smiled, and it was a genuine one. At least this whole mess had something positive mixed into it. I found out how to love some-one, and that was more precious than anything.

I opened the door, hearing Gold's cries haunt my ears and as I walked out into the silent corridor I wondered about something. I couldn't go to prison, I would be in there for life after admitting to this. I would never see Gold again, and it would kill me to know he was out there waiting for me to come out. He might never try to move on, and would beat himself up about it all the time.

_No...I had to make sure this was final._

I placed one hand on the empty gun, knowing that I had strategically placed the bullets right beside Gold. It would give me enough time before he realised just what I was planning. There was no way back from this. This was definitely the end for me, and for him.

* * *

Opening the large doors of the hall out into the open I noticed that the whole area was surrounded by police cars. Officer Jenny stood a few metres away holding the megaphone, whilst other Officer's stood armed and ready to shoot at me if I dared make a wrong move.

A weak smile played on my lips as I closed my eyes. Just what I had expected. Then a desperate voice entered my ears;

"Silver!"

I stole a quick glance amongst the crowd. It was Blue, and she was holding Red desperately as, just like Gold, she was breaking down for me to see.

_Did she know what I was planning?_

Red looked completely devastated, like his whole world had crashed and burned, and now he had nothing left to live for.

I smiled weakly at Blue, and watched as she caught Red from falling to the ground. His eyes looked glassed over, emotionless. It was as if someone had literally ripped his heart from his chest and stabbed it in front of him.

And for that moment I felt sorry for him.

"Put your hands behind your head!" Officer Jenny boomed, and instinctively I did as instructed.

The other Officer's did not approach me, they must have seen the gun in my trouser pocket and decided against it.

_Even though...it wasn't loaded. No-one knew that apart from me._

My eyes scanned across the crowd, only noticing Blue and Red amongst them, no-one else I recognised.

_So...Green and Ruby really were dead._

"Silver...no! Please...! I...can't..." Blue wailed, holding Red stable as she too broke down. I frowned at seeing my closest friend crumble in front of me. And this was all my fault. But I had to do this, for her, for Gold, for me.

Taking a deep breath I gazed up at the night sky, looking at the beautiful stars, remembering a time when I used to wish upon them to make things better.

I remembered it well. It was the only time I felt close to my mother. Whenever I gazed at the millions of stars in the sky was the only time I felt safe, secure, like nothing could hurt me any more. That was what I needed right now.

"My name is Silver..." I started, watching as the Officer's got their guns prepared, just in case I did try to strike them down.

"...and I am responsible for the murder of...Cyan."

I saw Blue gasp as more tears fell down her cheeks. Even Red seemed to acknowledge my existence for that moment. Officer Jenny seemed to grow impatient as she stared at me.

_Was she waiting for me to willingly get arrested? No chance._

I stood there, refusing to move, counting down the seconds.

_This was it...the end. Everything I had done and achieved was all going to be lost forever._

Closing my eyes I moved one of my hands from my head, hearing Officer Jenny's loud voice boom in my mind. But I didn't care. None of it mattered.

As I placed my hand on the gun that wasn't loaded I heard a scream, and the sound of frantic footsteps edging closer to me. It was Gold. He must have realised what my plan was.

_I wasn't going to prison. Never._

"SILVER STOP! THE GUN ISN'T LOADED!" Gold's wailing voice haunted my ears as I took a deep breath.

_No Gold...it's just too late._

And as a faint smirk teased my lips and my heart thundered in my chest I mumbled the words;

"...maybe in another life...Gold..."

I pulled the gun from my pocket and pointed it at one of the Officer's. As I pulled the trigger and heard the sound, and knew that no bullets were going to be flying at any Officer's I waited. Waited for the sound of another gun shot.

And then I heard it, closely followed by an excruciating pain searing through my body.

"NOOOOO! SILVER!" Blue's voice haunted my ears as my legs just collapsed underneath me like a card tower. My vision started to get blurry and with the final moments in sight I smiled.

_It was finally over...all of it...it was all over._

* * *

**Author's Note: NOOOO! Silver! What will happen next? The last chapter will be coming very soon!**


	24. A Change of Heart

**Author's Note: The end is here! Enjoy!**

* * *

**Chapter Twenty Four: A Change Of Heary**

In shock I jumped up, realising that in actual fact I wasn't dead. I didn't just get shot by hundred's of Police Officer's and I wasn't at Gold's birthday party. In fact I was standing on the edge of the side road, Sneasel looking up at me expectantly.

W_hat the hell...happened?_

"Ermmm...are you okay?" A voice entered my ears instantly pulling me from my thoughts. I stared back into azure eyes, eyes that I recognised from some distant memory. Then I looked down at my feet. Sneasel seemed annoyed that I hadn't said anything, but a worrying thought consumed me.

_Didn't she...evolve?_

Then I noticed a Rattatta standing a few metres away, looking confused.

Slowly realisation started to sink in, causing my whole body to tremble in shock.

_Oh my God...did...was that all...some sort of...premonition? _

But that couldn't be true! I was supposed to be dead! The officer's shot me! This guy shouldn't even be here!

"Snee~"

Without thinking I scooped her up in my arms and just hugged her, as a great weight release itself from my chest, feeling relief flood my body. No-one died!

"Are you...okay? Do you..want to stop the battle?" The boy continued.

As I looked at him I did the rarest of things. I smiled. This meant my whole life was going to change. I wouldn't go down the path of ruin and despair.

_I had a chance to make things right! I could make the right decision!_

"I...yeah...let's stop."

Even though the kid looked hurt, that frown soon changed when I continued smiling at him. I couldn't even begin to explain how overjoyed I was. _Given a second chance? I wasn't going to screw up this time._

"Why?" He grumbled.

"I wouldn't have beat you anyway." I lied, watching as his whole countenance lit up right before my eyes.

"...what?"

"Keep at it. I bet one day you'll give the Elite Four a run for their money."

Sneasel seemed confused, but I was sure she understood the madness to my actions. I never acted nice, to anyone. But now...I had to. If I was to make sure no psychos tried to ruin my life then I had to learn to change. This was a good place to start.

"Wow! Thanks!" He cried happily, returning the purple rat Pokemon to it's Pokeball. I wanted to roll my eyes, but instead I waved him off and started walking towards the Goldenrod Pokemon Centre.

It felt good to do something nice for a change, and now I knew he wouldn't go and kill himself over what I had said. It might spur him on to improve.

As I walked with Sneasel to the Pokemon Centre a thought hit me.

Gold and I were not a couple, and never had been. I was back to the beginning, but if I was right Gold would be in the Pokemon Centre. Even if he was with Crystal, at least that was something. She wouldn't be crippled for the rest of her life which was a bonus.

And as I smiled wildly I found myself running to the Pokemon Centre, ready to alter the course of my life.

* * *

Opening the large doors of the Pokemon Centre I looked around. It was exactly the same as before. The same group of people, the same Nurse Joy at the counter, smiling that same smile. Nothing had changed. I walked up to the counter and allowed her to heal Sneasel.

Slowly I glanced over my shoulder and felt my heart lift up to the heavens.

I saw Gold and Crystal at the same table as before, talking to each other. They hadn't noticed me yet. I smiled weakly, eternally grateful to have a second chance at this, and this time there was no way I was going to screw up.

"Here you are, your Sneasel is in perfect condition!" Nurse Joy piped up, handing my precious partner over to me. She beamed happily and nuzzled my face, and I was so happy at that moment.

_Sneasel was here, un-evolved...but still here._

Whilst lost in my own thoughts I heard a familiar voice enter my ears;

"Silver!"

And as I turned around I saw it was Gold, and he was waving at me, smiling that stupid smile like before. For that moment I smiled back, feeling Sneasel struggle in my arms. She obviously wanted to say hello to them, she hadn't seen them for a while.

Slowly I released her onto the floor and watched as she ran towards the table, happily beaming up at Gold.

I walked over to the table, hearing Gold's laugh which was like music to my ears. The smile lingered on my face as I watched the scene unfold and even when I saw Crystal's shocked expression it didn't alter my mood.

"Dear God... Silver is smiling!"

Gold's beautiful amber eyes stared into my own, and that smile fizzled from his face. It was replaced by shock, and I swear for a brief moment I saw that love in his eyes just like before.

_Had it always been there?_

"Are you...feeling okay?" He joked, chuckling afterwards, as Sneasel now started fussing over Crystal. I shrugged my shoulder's, looking away for a moment.

_How was it that Gold was here? Completely okay, oblivious to my own visions and dreams. Is that all it was? Just a vision?_

"Silver...?"

I allowed my mind to zone out for a moment. I thought about a lot of things. Of how Gold and I argued so much at the beginning, how he ruthlessly took advantage of me in the cafe toilets, how he had come to my house and claimed me unmercifully.

None of that happened and for that moment I felt a slight sadness creep into my heart.

Gold stood up, looking me over carefully, maybe for signs of injury or something. Then he raised an eyebrow in thought.

"...something isn't right."

"Gold..." I murmured, looking deeply into his eyes. They shimmered beautifully, just like I remembered. He looked questioning, edging me to continue with whatever he thought I was going to say.

Only I wasn't planning on saying anything.

Without thinking I grabbed Gold by the scruff of his t-shirt and crushed our lips together. He whimpered for a moment as his own hands placed themselves on top of mine.

As his eyes closed I heard wolf whistles and jeers from the other people in the Pokemon Centre. Even Crystal gasped in shock. But none of that mattered.

It took a few seconds before Gold's lips were moving softly against my own, and his hands moved to hold my waist, pulling me closer to him. Smiling into the kiss I realised that perhaps all that wishing upon the stars when I was a kid actually paid off.

It just took a while for it to take effect.

As we pulled away from the kiss I looked into half lidded golden eyes, and a beautiful crimson face. I guessed he wasn't expecting that. He tried to speak, but no words came out. Instead of watching this battle with speech I shook my head, smiling weakly.

"I...I..."

"You don't have to say anything."

"I'd say he does! You can't go around kissing people Silver!" Crystal cried, her own face sporting a red glow. She too obviously didn't expect that. Gold's hands remained on my waist, not quite knowing if he should remove them or not.

"Well..." Gold muttered bashfully, smiling like an idiot once more.

"What's the big idea?! So what? Are you...into Gold now or something?!" She cried once again, her cheeks puffing up in rage like an angered Jigglypuff.

As I looked into golden eyes I realised that the answer was staring me in the face. I wasn't just into Gold, I was uncontrollably in love with him.

"I think I am," I answered, watching as Gold's face contorted to confusion, then he blushed fiercely. He never usually blushed at anything, but now his honey coloured complexion was changing to crimson within seconds.

"I...wow...I wasn't expecting this!"

"Neither was I!" She exclaimed, causing me to roll my eyes in annoyance. At least she was alive and well. I looked at the ground, smiling to myself. I would never meet Cyan, he would never be a part of my life now.

I had altered that part of my future. No psychopaths trying to ruin my life, no-one dying because of me. I would actually get my happy ending after all.

And as I stared at Gold for the final time I chuckled to myself, recalling a past conversation that wasn't too pleasant for me, yet it was what started this whole thing off.

Smirking playfully I decided to throw the words out there, that would hopefully change our relationship forever;

"So...how about a game of chess?"

* * *

**End**

**Author's Note: Ah...beautiful journey. So sad to see it end, but hopefully I'll see you al again real soon! Read and review! Makes a girl very happy!**


	25. Bonus Chapter

**Author's Note: Alas! This is a small bonus chapter, getting ready to write a sequel! I has ideas people! Please enjoy!**

* * *

**Bonus chapter.**

**Cyan's POV**

I leapt up in shock, almost hitting my head against the wall. As a cold sweat consumed me I realised I was in my bed, and the sunlight was seeping in through my opened curtains.

_Was it morning?_

Rubbing my head lightly I inhaled deeply.

_Another nightmare? But...why was I dreaming about ruining some-one's life I had never met before? Yes okay, apparently they screwed my brother over or something but, seriously? One, my brother might be sensitive, but he would never kill himself. And two, I am not that cunning to plot a whole devious scheme like that._

My eyes glanced at the ceiling in thought.

_The guy with red hair...what was his name again? Silver...? Yes. Why did he seem so familiar? According to my nightmare I would have to work with him?_

I sighed heavily, still feeling a bit groggy from jumping up suddenly. Oh yeah, my new job started tomorrow at Goldenrod Department Store. Now I was worried that I would meet some-one like that...what would I do if I did?

"Cyan!" I heard my Grandmother's voice call for me, causing me to grumble incoherent nonsense to myself. Did I really have to get up already? Sighing heavily I sat up, rubbing my eyes.

"Alright! I'm awake!" I yelled back, shuffling to the edge of my bed. As I started to look for clothes to wear I continued to think about that nightmare. About all those people I had never met before in my life, and how I only woke up when the guy with the dark hair shot me. Closing my eyes tightly I took a deep breath.

_Isn't it a bad thing if you die in your dreams?_

Okay, thinking about it was doing me no favours, so hastily I got dressed in my casual attire, consisting of a plain black t-shirt and denim jeans, and then decided to make a move downstairs. I had no idea what time it was, so perhaps it was later than I thought.

As I walked down the stairs I noticed the front door was wide open and my brother stood there, smiling wildly like he had just won some competition or something.

_Was this why my Grandmother called me?_ I flashed him a weak smile as he walked over to me.

"Big brother! You'll never guess what happened today!"

I leaned against the banister, looking at my sibling. His azure eyes sparkling in delight. I wondered why he was so happy.

"Do tell."

"I won my first Pokemon battle today!"

I blinked in shock. Joey, my baby brother, had just become an official Pokemon Trainer and already he was winning battles? It made me smile, genuinely. I was so proud of him.

"Wow, I am impressed!"

"Yeah, one day I'll be as strong as you are!"

Rolling my eyes I smirked. I doubted that, but it was nice to dream big. Joey continued smiling wildly so I figured it wasn't just because he won his first battle. Something else must have happened.

"Is that all?"

Joey shook his head, almost falling off balance in excitement.

"No, the guy I battled...he was really nice to me, he said that if I continued training I could beat the Elite Four one day!"

At that moment I froze.

_Didn't my nightmare consist of some-one being horrible to him, telling him he sucked at being a trainer? So..why was it the complete opposite?_

"...I see..."

"He had a REALLY tough Pokemon too!"

Once again I felt my heart tighten in my chest.

_Just like my dream...I had to find out if it was the same..._

"...what Pokemon was it?"

I watched as Joey looked thoughtful for a moment, like he was trying to think of the right name, and then it hit him. Smiling once again he told me;

"It was a Sneasel."

Just like that I felt all the blood drain from my body, making me feel slightly light headed.

_No...this couldn't be true. Did the guy have red hair too?_

"...the guy...what did he look like?" I asked, almost struggling to say the words. My brother was looking more confused by the second, probably wondering why I was asking all these questions.

_If only he knew..._

"He had red hair..."

It was starting to get weirder and weirder. Was my dream some sort of future warning of the opposite? _Man...I was confused._ I placed a hand to my head in thought, trying to figure out just what the hell was going on.

First I have a nightmare about my kid brother killing himself because of a red headed male, and now this?

"...are you okay?" Joey asked nervously. I glanced at him and forced a smile. He didn't need to know about this.

"Yeah...anyway Grandma wants to see you."

I watched my sibling run happily into the living room, leaving me to think some more about what had just happened. Frowning in thought I tried to figure out what to do, should I try to avoid this guy just in case my dream happened?

_What if it DID happen? Did I even have that murderous side to me?_

Cringing in thought I didn't think I was truly capable of such malicious antics. Unless...my dream was trying to tell me something I wasn't aware of. That I had a dark side inside me, that was capable of causing so much destruction. I shot a glance at the door, wondering about my next course of action.

And then it hit me. I would find this guy, and I would make sure none of those bad things happened. It was the least we all deserved.

* * *

**Author's Note: Ah! Thanks to all of you for sticking with this story! And I hope you will enjoy the sequel too :D but for now...ciao!**


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